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I'm the mother of 3 boys...one is 20 and others are in their teens.they are my life and i would do anything for them. This is the main reason i became a provider. My boys always come first. My job second and my free time is last... After leaving my husband 7 years ago i had no idea what i would do...i went to Flight Attendant Academy the Air Canada went on strike almost immediately after i graduated..i worked as a waitress,did some acting {no not porn}but none of it paid enough to keep 3 young boys fed. Sure we were happy but happy doesn't pay the bills. One day i seen an ad in the local paper looking for escorts etc. The rest is history. Thinking wow i get to get paid for something i enjoy doing....nice. At first i didn't tell my boys anything...they were too young. As they became older i told them. I figured it would be better coming from me then someone else. My boys are wonderful and very understanding. We don't talk about my work of course but if they have questions about sex they do ask. I just tell them "OK right now i am not your mom",before i answer...lol. I think by me being a provider it gives my boys a better respect for women. They know i will not take crap from men anymore.They know i stand up for myself.They see me being very protective of them and others. They are fine young gentlemen. I'm always told what a wonderful job i have done raising my boys. Being a single mom isn't easy for sure but this job certainly helps ME provide well for them. I thank you all for this. kisses, Emma A

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It is tru that after 8 years, a certain bond can develop between 2 individuals, even by seeing each other on a casual basis. It si the intemtion that counts. But in my case, I am in the same boat as EDMan described above: even though some ladies are amazing and I have learnt to get to know some of them over time, I still don't know one SP's full name. So if I see an obituary, there must be a picture in order for me to recognize her otherwise, it will be just a name that while rading, I would tell to myself: 'so young...'

I think you made the right decision for you, Brandi. I don't think it would have been wrong if you had gone to the funeral, though, if you could do it discretely. In the other part of my life, I've worked closely with quite a few funeral homes and attended dozens of funerals over the last 15 years or so. I'm writing from that experience. Unless the person is quite elderly, or has been shut-in for a long, long time, or has a disability that seriously restricted their ability to be out in the world, most funeral services have a wide variety of people attending. They don't all know each other. Many people will be there who may hardly know the deceased, but have accompanied their spouse or a friend who did know him/her. If the death was sudden, it would be very unusual for members of the family to be greeting people at the door of the funeral home or church when people arrive. If the deceased had been ill for a long time and was on good terms with his/her family, it's more likely that family members will be greeting people when they arrive. You might need to make a judgment call about this, but it would be unusual for anyone greeting folks as they arrive to also ask questions about why someone is there. You can always call the funeral home and ask how many people they're expecting to attend the service. They'll tell you if it's really just a small, private family service, or if they're expecting a couple of hundred people. If the service is being held in a church, there will usually be a lot of people there. If the whole service is being held at the graveside, fewer people will attend. Funeral homes are asked this very question several times a day. Estranged family members, former spouses and other people who have had a difficult relationship with the deceased, or with members of his/her family, often call the funeral home and ask this question. There's no need to feel conspicuous for asking! There's usually a guest book available for signing. I wouldn't sign it, if I was at a funeral for a client. There's often a gathering after the service, too. I wouldn't attend. That's where questions about how someone knows the deceased would be most likely to be asked. And I wouldn't go to the burial if it's happening after the service. Again, more than half of the people who attend the service also won't go to the graveyard, so there's nothing conspicuous about staying away. Going, however, could raise questions. But if there will be more than about 80 people at the funeral, to arrive at the funeral home or church only a couple of minutes before the service starts, and to leave when it's over, shouldn't be a problem. Many other people will do the same thing for different reasons.

I would definitely go if I were placed in the situation; in fact and this is going to sound weird but wtf LOL I have an envelope that is sealed and placed with a friend to be delivered to the funeral director who will be handling my Arrangements, in the event of my untimely passing, inside is the contact info for a few very close friends some of them SP's and some not, and directions for him to notify them of my passing and extend an invitation from me, for them to attend the service if they so choose to do so.... Some may come others may not LOL it wont matter to me; the important thing is that in this business/hobby we seldom see each other from one descrete apointment to the next and would not want these close friends to think that I had just "left" them with no word of goodbye.... Like Brandi and i am sure many others here I "travel" in many different circles for work, volinteer activities, and play and my Family do not know all my contacts Loki318

i would go and just say your a regular at the same bar. But it would be hard for the client to be at the sp funeral because of the fake names used. But i would go if I was a long time customer.:sad:

Let this thread remind anyone that have forgotten - these encounters we have are a 'relationship'. It is not just about the physical aspect, but also about the extended friendships that get forged. If anyone forgot, meeting, being with someone for extended periods of time does result in emotional connections. (Let's forget about the business side for a second). In terms of this particular circumstance (and every one is unique), perhaps it helps to have some guidelines to help decide whether to attend or not. Discretion - will attending place you, or the person in a bad light with their family members and friends? How emotionally attached were you to the person? Will you have an emotional outburst with their family and friends present? What circles did this person play in? Will attending cause you to run into another client and what of that potential impact? I think in the end you did the sensible thing by not attending. I'm sorry for your loss. Take this with you, cherish the good times you shared with your friend, you will always have those memories.

Personally I think it's a good idea to go. If you had a friendship for the last 8 years and that is what it was, then I don't see a problem with you going. Personally I would love to know that my favorite SP attended my funeral, of course I'm not actually having one and I told my son he can flush my ashes down the toilet for all I care! If you were close, then I don't see why not.

I haven't personally gone to an SP's however my snap answer is 'yes I would' Recognize that a funeral is really for the people who know the deceased and not for the deceased. It is quite ok to say 'He/She really impressed me the few times we met and I felt I should be here' It is quite ok to say 'We met for work/ We bump into each other around town' It is quite ok to feel compelled to go and didn't. Sometimes the intention is what counts.

In addition to being a provider, I'm also self-employed in another field. It's work I enjoy, but it doesn't pay well enough to support my children and myself. I take on contracts in my other career, but the majority of my income comes from being an SP. My son has no idea about my real line of work. To keep things as separate as possible, I only see clients between about 10:00 a.m. and 2:30 p.m. on weekdays and I do outcalls at most one or two evenings a week. Those evenings are usually booked up weeks in advance and are very stable. I'm always home by 10:00 p.m. at the latest. When my son goes to visit his father in Ontario, my schedule can be as open and flexible as I want it to be. I generally ask clients to confirm meetings with me in the morning of the day we're getting together. I always explain that I'm a mother and it's possible (but not very likely) that something could happen to my child--he could come down with a bug or something--which is the only reason I would need to postpone our meeting. So far, that's worked very well. I don't think that being a provider has affected my parenting. I am who I am, and how I am, everywhere. I think I'm very fortunate that my children have felt that they could talk about sex, sexuality, safe sex and STDs with me very openly. They trust me to be open-minded and to give them straight, honest responses to what they talk about. It never seems to have occurred to them that I have any special reason for being very well-informed, it's just the way things are. My kids tease me and say that I was probably a lot like Hermione Granger, the girl in the Harry Potter novels, when I was growing up.:lol: I did go through a period when I felt misgivings because there's a big part of my life that I can't share in any way with my children. I finally realized that children rarely know their parents very well in many ways. The parent/child relationship is largely about the children, and rightly so. One of the hardest things even for adult children is to recognize their parents as complete human beings who are separate from them and who have thoughts, ideas, hopes and dreams that have nothing to do with their kids at all, but are part of who the parent is, as a person. Looking at my situation that way makes it easy to separate these pieces of my life.