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Most of us who have been doing this for awhile would probably agree that it's probably best to see this as paid sex for fun which can be endlessly enjoyable, rather than some unrealistic (as well as an often sad - frequently pathetic - and sometimes dangerous - for all concerned - "love" fantasy.") That doesn't mean you can't have some really good friends - and once or twice perhaps (in my experience, at least - YMMV), if you are really honest with yourself - and she is as well, you can find someone you really love as a person - as opposed to being "in love with". And that's pretty damn good. But she's not your "girlfriend". Or your "wife". She's a true friend that goes way beyond this "life". And sometimes, that can be as good as, if not better than, any alternative.

Today I am celebrating the people at CERB!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to say thank you to the gentlemen who chose my presence in their busy lives; the ones who brought wrapped surprises in their hands with lingerie, wine, toiletries, flowers and chocolates; you know who you are and, you also know that our time together was repeated in the imagination, over the emails, on the phone or in new rendezvous-, but it has not ended yet, we are learning each other better and better.... I was nervous with my first visitor, especially because we formed a bond through chats and long letters on the net, and he helped me to relax.... Later on, a well known Cerbite came to visit me and I was so tight up that he must have thought I was a total incompetent....I almost fell from my own shoe while undressing, and while at the shower, I almost knocked my head off on the shower head....but I hope, if he reads this, he understands and laughs...he is the only one who has not come back to me...no wonder!!!!! I could not expect different... I want to say thank you also to the beautiful people who welcomed me and keeps in touch through the net at least once a week and show me their care, give advice and basically "are there" if needed. ...And I have to acknowledge the great presence of Emma Alexandra in my affaires with Cerb. Emma is a Lady and a great person....the ones who have been with her know it and, the ones who have not yet visited with her.........what are you waiting for???? Three hurrahs for The MOD for teaching me with great patience to put pictures, to correctly post jokes and fix all the other messes I made confusing emails and addresing the wrong people....etc...thanks MODS (I did not get one of your emails lately...I guess I'm learning?) Thanks to all of you for trusting your bodies, and hearts into my care and for giving me the chance to make you happier just by being your girlfriend ! See you all soon again, and again...and again Tracie Gold, your Trace!!! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

One aspect I would like to add is that it is possible for an SP to fall in love with a special man, leave the industry and eventually go back into functioning in a normal life. We are not immune to being overcome with emotion and falling in love with the gentlemen we see. It does, however, take a lot of patience and love to adjust to leaving this very addictive industry. It does happen though. It happened to me and I'm currently in the happiest and healthiest relationship of my life.

Cat

Excellent summary of a common occurrence. I've talked to a number of SPs about 'love' in the Industry, after having the word thrown around a fair number of times now when sharing companionship. (To note: IMHO, 'love' is confusing at the best of times, let alone when the lines are blurred like in this hobby.) One young lady said she no longer knew what 'love' was, which I found unfortunate, but understood with clashes in today's culture of polyamourous sexual relations vs. yesterday's culture of monogamous coupling (not saying either one is for better or for worse). (Then add delusional TV/Movie fantasy love and viola!) At least she was honest about it. I don't believe sex or marriage = love. Sex/marriage can most certainly be an act of love, as much they can be nothing about love (which I can only I assume are both better with love than without, cause sex is better (don't know about marriage - I'm a proud marriage virgin :) )). We've discussed the differences in Loving sex, saying things like I Love your ass, or I Love your oral skills, or I Love how you look today (example, sexy and radiant) - with none of it the same as saying 'I Love You'. *hair raises* Having an SP saying this during the throes of passion really got me thinking of what exactly this, in context of the hobby, was all about. (Who knows though - the World's one mixed-up place most days.) I did not reciprocate. I like the quote in Wedding Crashers about: What is 'true love'? True love is your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another. ...and the girl responds: "...cheesy but I like it." I concur. So, to the reality of unacquainted love, if ones flinging of woo is not countered by the other - then simply move on, as continuing to obsess beyond that then moves one into stalker territory (remember, don't use 'pet names' either! :P - sorry, joke from another thread). While one may like to believe it's flattering to the object of ones desire to have you desire them, if they do not want said desire, it's fruitless. It's like when you offer help to someone in need of help (from your perspective), but they don't want your help, as they don't think they need it - so it's useless try to help or keep nagging the person, you know what I mean? If they want help, and they know you are willing to give it, and they take it, then great, both parties are that much better off. I believe life is too short to waste time on fruitless endeavours. Reminds me of a quote I heard from an old guy once: There are 2 things in life you never chase - Buses and woman - as you will get left behind every single time. Ever try chasing an OC Transpo bus? Like love, Good Luck! The other reality is this is a hobby of fantasy, and a 'True GFE' can be made to feel like 'love' - as if the SP were your GF. (Would you not be in love with your GF if/when one has one?) ...but they are not your GF, SPs offer the 'experience' of them being your GF for which money is exchanged for time, albeit un-rushed. ...of which the 'experience' should end according to you agreement to only do it for whatever amount of time was paid for. In other words, after ones session, while it may be enjoyable to bask in the afterglow and adding footage to the ol' spank bank - believing one 'loves' the SP (again, just IMHO) is only opening a can or worms to ones own disappointment to the fact anything beyond business is highly unlikely. (To compliment: I can see in other perspectives how a hobbyist falling in 'love' with an SP can be a testament to the expert skills of the SP to act like your GF enough to make one (mistakenly) do so. ...with this a double-edged sword, as I am also sure SPs like repeat customers whom hold them on a pedestal (I know I would! A nice stroke to the ego, but more importantly - more business! After all, that's what this service industry is principally all about isn't it - business (vs. love)? (Not to say one can't love their work :) don't we all want a job that you 'love' so much it doesn't seem like work at all?)). Such a fine-line to walk that it's inevitably things get blurred sometimes - another part of the 'dance' I spose.) Regardless of how mind-blowingly amazing the SP may be and one would 'love' to find a real GF like that, whom was your true counterpoint - just 'love' your shared time together and appreciate it for what it is/was, and look elsewhere for your 'true love' where others are in the same business of finding the same (ex: plenty of fish). To me, this hobby is an outlet for passion/recreational sex while waiting for 'true love' with someone I know wants to be with me as much as I do them (sans monetary payment). ...but man, do I ever 'love' the practice! :) Be honest to yourself and to those around you and it will save yourself and others unnecessary heartache. Carpe Peaciem! (...or should that be: Carpe Lustiem! :P )

I think it makes a big difference you have a core understanding that "falling in love" is part of an emotional feedback loop inside of us, that happens when an SO (significant other) helps bring out our core essence and magic, while at the same time welcoming reciprocation. I'd love to fall in love - if the Sp is ok with it - during a session. The aftermath is so delicious, and lasting. It's like Christmas when you're a kid - it's amazing while it lasts, but you don't need to ask your dad to rope and chain Santa for the rest of the year. It will happen again.

Stalkers would disagree......