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This is not about where people advertise, or where other people look for ads to call. This comes down to being a responsible individual participating in this activity. I'm not sticking up for CL or any like site by making this statement. the bottom line here is this - and it has been stated on this site many a time - if you show up for a date and she looks young, ask for ID and if she looks too young or cannot accommodate ID - then do the right thing and leave. Remember CERB is moderated, but the mod cannot catch everything so sometimes even though you book with someone via CERB, you still need to exercise good judgment and maturity when you show up. Play, but play safe.

This thread is not promoting Valerie, it's informing the rest of us that we now have a way of protecting ourselves. It's also a warning to trolls out there who use the threat of a bad review to extort price reductions and free services from SPs. They are out there, I have met several in person. There are members of CERB who are singing a very different tune when they are on other boards with different user ids. If this thread reaches only one of them it was worth it. The dilemma is that our work is unlike any other. We bare the most intimate parts of ourselves daily and we are human. We have bad days, it's unavoidable. Instead of being able to retreat into a cubical and make busy avoiding the world we have to go out into it and pretend everything is glorious. I remember having to go to work the same day I lost my children in court. Why? To put a roof over my head because the lawyers had eaten every cent of my savings. Another time I buried a very close friend at noon and had to be on shift at 5pm. Why? My agency had a no show=termination policy. If I didn't show up I had no job and I was still paying off the lawyers. We have no sick days to take or personal days. There is no 50-50 pension plan waiting for us. If we are hurt in an accident or at work, there is no safety net. No disability checks arrive by direct deposit. We are 100% out there, on our own. Our reputation is all we have! So if someone had a less than desirable experience, that's unfortunate and I'm genuinely sorry. It's not unheard of and certainly no threat to ones well being. If you have a problem with a provider you have two options. Either approach her directly, explain your concerns and see if she will rectify the situation, or move on and see what else is out there. But the first thing I would gently suggest is to look long and hard in the mirror and know exactly what it was that left you feeling the way you did. Dissatisfaction emanates from within and permeates everything. I have many clients who know Valerie and are quite fond of her with no complaints. One mans treasure is another mans garbage, and there isn't a woman out there that isn't attractive to someone out there. SPs deserve to be able to make a living at their chosen profession without fearing someone with a personal vendetta will try to undermine her ability to support herself. Valerie took the necessary steps to protect herself by registering as a DNR, he chose to ignore it. I realize there are two sides to every story and he may have felt he had the right to do what he did, but SPs are not able to defend themselves on other boards so she took the only steps she could to secure her livelihood. He took the risk and now his name is out there. If someone writes a bad review about me without contacting me first, giving me a chance to rectify the situation I will definitely consider doing the same thing now that I know it's doable. cat

Report the pm's to mod. It's likely that it's someone trying to discredit the competition.

Suffice to say this thread raises awareness around this 'issue'. If you've been burned, I guess the best lesson is learn from one's mistakes. That said, if you have an emotional connection with someone (which does happen), it makes it that much more difficult to turn one's back on someone in a legitimate or innovative time of need. So is there a right or wrong way to deal with this type of situation? I believe the answer is up to the individual involved.