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I have been a member of CERB now for a little over a year. I joined because I wanted to communicate with SPs and MAs and their clients. The "recommendation" part of the name intrigued me. I am not a frequent hobbyist but I have done it for many years (since 1956). So hearing about the escort and massage scene that is going on nowadays was of great interst to me. The recommendation part of the Board turned out to be fascinating. People were having wonderful experiences, and ladies and gents were always curteous and complimentary. I was particularly pleased with the friendly "tone" of the Board. I soon learned that sex is a frequent topic here, it is by no means the only one. Members have questions about all sorts of worldly issues: computers crashing or being infected by viruses; the Habs losing; a member or a loved one getting seriously ill; funny jokes in words or pics; politics and work. Really, the range of topics is endless and makes one want to check in every day. The responses members provide to questions are informed and always very sympathetic. New members sometimes apologize for the question they are about to ask, but always get very helpful and kind answers. I never would have thought a Board could work so well. Credit must go to the members for their enthusiasm and the time they give. Much credit, of course, goes to the MOD who monitors the Board with sympathy and firmness. I would love to find out if you agree that CERB is a community. What is it about this Board that keeps you coming back?

I am in recovery. I have done a lot of work spiritually and working the 12 steps to be in such a great place right now. I am wondering who may be on the same path. PM me if you wish to keep your anonymity. I'm looking for new sober friends to share the joys of sobriety. grateful to be sober today. r100rs

I do not ask for a full legal name and screen more along the lines of intuition. For starters, I do not make appts from payphones or blocked numbers. I don't care if people claim they have to be careful with their privacy. If that's the case, they shouldn't be calling escorts. It is very rude to assume they can be completely anonymous while I have to disclose an address and coming into my space. Tit for tat. I listen to the questions these guys ask me, their tone of voice and how they respond to the questions I ask them. If I hear something I don't like, I will make an excuse and say that I'm busy. I can tell within the first 30 seconds of talking to them if I'm going to meet them or not. I don't care if I've just lost money. I will not see someone if I get a bad feeling. There will always be other people calling and I have a long list of regulars. Like Shortcake, I lived 5 minutes away from Russell Williams and many of those break ins occurred in my area. I also encountered someone running out from my backyard last week while they were attempting to elude the police. They ran out and scared the hell out of me as I was coming out the front door just before dawn. I yelled and screamed at him to get off my property and chased him with a lawn ornament. I was more shocked and startled but also mad in the heat of the moment. So after this incident, it really did spook me and made me realize that anything could happen in a split second. It has also given me more awareness as to who I decide to invite into my private space.

Not to be rude or anything, but there has been a couple of threads about this. I am sure people are aware of the risks now adays. There is also a chart of the common STI's and their risks. Maybe you should ask the Mod if you can gain access to the SP area and speak amoung the Ladies? Maybe others feel differently, but I dont think anyone has the right to preach about the right and wrongs in life. As for giving personal info about the lady you metioned without saying her name, I think that is best to keep to yourself. I am some people around you or that knwo you can out 2 and 2 together and figure out who she is. This board does not condone trash talk unless you have 100% proof, then I suggest you speak with the Mod and he can decide what to do from there. Here is the link to the STI chart and thread: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=34872&highlight=chart

Perhaps there should be a group started here where all members and posts are anon., for support. I know there are a trillion "groups/forums" out there but I know there are some folks who get support from where they feel most comfortable, and there are some who feel that way here. Having the posts and members be hidden allows one to be very very honest. Anyway just a thought.

Greetings Cerbites As previously stated, I was diagnosed with the "big C" a couple of weeks ago. Well I have a date for surgery, it is next Tuesday. Because of backlogs "in the system" I am now traveling down to London for this surgery! How weird, Ottawa's hospitals are too busy, so let's find someplace else to have it done. Anyway, will be out of commission for a while. Guess my tongue will get a nice rest!! Maybe I can be "serviced" by one of the nurses on night shift. Nudge, Nudge, Wink, Wink. Have a good Easter long weekend all. Play safe, have fun, and of course.......lots of licks! PS: thanx to those who have sent out their good wishes and thoughts, it is appreciated. The Liquor

I have to disagree with you on this one, I'm afraid. If CERB's membership was constant and unchanging, and if we all had perfect memories, then I'd be right with you - but both SPs and hobbyists come and go, and even for those who have been around for a while a reminder of the potential pitfalls isn't necessarily a bad idea. If this thread makes someone, somewhere stop and think a little harder about what they're doing (or not doing), or if someone learns something from it, or if someone decides to go and find out more about something as a result of it, then I think it's been worthwhile. And I won't complain if it comes up again a few months down the road, for the same reasons; we'll have new members by then who won't have seen it before. Those who feel they have nothing further to learn are free to move along.

And I really don't care for these threads that keep coming up,after being discussed in great detail, year after year after year, and please Angeltbay do not take it personally. All you need to do, is have it YOUR WAY while conducting your sexual appetite and not to announce and start fear mongering over BB anything. Educate yourself, get checked out,have sex the way you want it,and keep your own choice to yourself. If a man wishes to have covered everything,which should also include protective dam while giving oral to his lady if he is that worried about BB, then that's his choice,if a lady only offers CBJ and perhaps you should not kiss or DFK too, again that is her choice and preference. Signed.... dislikes this controversial topic,only because others really need to educate themselves on the topic at hand and risks involved. I know I might take some flak for this,but I'm not interested in this debate,and discussions anymore here on this board.

I'm a non smoker. I personally don't care if anybody smokes. I don't want smoking in my place (because of my furniture and clothes) and I don't want to kiss cigarette breath, but that's what mouth wash and gum is for. As for your clothes smelling, hopefully they'll be on the floor or hung up, so who cares what they smell like? Don't worry about it. I'm sure you smell wonderful. I'm sure 50% of my clients smoke, I never notice. I have one client, that I can tell he just had a smoke in the car before ringing my bell, but a shower and some mouth wash and I don't notice anymore. There are much, much, much worse things to smell. Some of my best friends are smokers :D

ok, i dont want to offend anyone with this post because i dont believe in BB-anyhing with all the diseases that are out there, i dont like taking the risk. Ive had alot of people ask me if i offer it, and i reply with "if i offer it to you, imagine how many other peopke i offer it to" Really, just because a lady or gentleman says they are clean doesnt mean they are. Ive known ladies who were escorts in this town that i live in who had herpees, and wasnt using protection (she hasnt been in town for a few yesrs and someone has told me the health unit will be called if she comes back to work) . Why does anyone really want to risk this? I dont want to scare anyone, but id love to know what people think about this? Like, if u can go to a docctor, show me the papers that you are clean, then maybe ill consider it. But nowadays, Aids, and herpees are a growing epidemic. Ladie4 if you're doing it just for the money, think about all the risks. Gentlemen, think about all the other guys she may have done something with like that. I know it feels better without, but you must think of your health, and the health of the people around you as well (this goes for both parties) Would you pick someone up from a bar that you dont know and not think about saety issues? Im just trying to understand the thought process of thoes who offer it, and thoes who request it.

I just hope when this is discussed , no one, gentleman or lady, is thinking "he sees lots of woman because he sees escorts" or " she sees lots of men because she is an escort" That element has to be taken out of the discussion altogether. When it comes to talk of std's no one talks about the single unattached guy on the dating scene,seeing more than one woman, or the woman that sits at the bar waiting to be picked up, or the married man/woman seeing someone on the side, and he/she is seeing a few people. Point is, std's are caused by sex, whether with wife/husband gf/bf single woman/man, or escort/gentleman Making the escort industry a focal point of the discussion of std's reinforces the negative stereotype that mainstream society has of escorting. I hope that came out right RG

I believe in education so people understand the risks they are taking and how to protect themselves. I also believe that people make decisions that are best for themselves, and what they do with their own body is not up to us to judge. This might sound controversial, but I respect the seriousness of diseases like Hep C and HIV with their potential to severely impact your quality of life and ultimately take it. I don't see what the big deal is about herpes or any STI that is curable with antibiotics. 1/4 women have herpes, so can it really be that big of a deal? If you have to take antibiotics for a week for the equivalent or a common cold, is that really a big deal? I'm not trying to undermine our health here, but I just want to put things in perspective. I think herpes and curable STI's are stigmatized because they are sexually contracted. If they were contracted another way, I don't think it would be such a big deal. Also remember that most gents on this board being older than us received a pre-HIV/AIDS sexual education. We've received a post-HIV/AIDS sexual education. I have personally had only a handful of sexual partners and offer massage partly to reduce my risk of contracting an STI/STD. This is my choice, what works best for me. I respect the personal choices others make about their own body. No judgments here!

I get migraines a lot, and my doctor prescribed a medication called Axert. It works like a charm, and stops a headache dead in its tracks. I swear by it!

I used to get them something terrible, now, not so often and not so terrible. First, I'm a coffaholic...and yes, if I don't get my fix, I get a headache from caffeine withdrawl...thats why I need at least 2-3 cups to kick start me in the morning. But I also got headaches from other factors...the cure, I stumbled upon by accident but makes sense. First avoid cold. Just think of eating ice cream too fast, you get a headache...heat works (at least for me) When I get a headache now, I have a hot bath, water as hot as bearable. I climb into the tub, get most of my head under water (not nose or mouth lol) and have a relaxed bath...the heat usually eliminates the headache RG

Well you could apply for a job at the weathernetwork! They cold use some help with thier perdictions!!! lol

Shortcake I truly sympathise with your situation. My SO is a severe migrain sufferrer to the point where she is often hospitilised for pain control. We have tried everything from homeopaths to accupunture and al aspects of modern medicine. Presently she is with a pain management specialist but the side affects of the drugs leave alot to be desired. Your diet will play a big part for there are foods that will trigger migrains. I wish you all the best for severe migrains can be realy debilitating and crimp ones lifestyle.

Wow! Such unprofessional conduct from the ladies. I always have contacted my inquiries in a timely fashion. Never have I stood anyone up, unless it were an emergency. Perhaps checking if the ladies have good reccomindations posted? It is awful long way for you to go for nothing! Hope you find the right ladies to spend time with!

I'd be creeped out too... and I was. Years ago this happened to me and I had to go loiter in another aisle while she chatted with my parents, who were too polite to tell her to go away. Yes they made "small talk" and were very annoyed that this person held them up. I'm not saying this is the same situation... but the attention from the ex was not wanted by myself or my parents. Some people don't get hints. As for the mental health issue... I did feel that it was just tossed in there rather nonchalently and wondered why? Have to say I agree with Naomi's points.

Well that is your opinion and is fine but saying nobody would care for the thread if it was not for the mental illness part is a little extreme. I didn't even make BPD part of my first post. I don't understand why you keep assuring she broke up with him, we don't have that information as far as I know. Also, why would she be freaked out? Is not like he was stalking her, he happened to be there that's all. As for him talking to her parents, perhaps he was close to them? Are you saying any posts that do no provide full detalis and bring up speculation should not be made? In that case I believe the readers who do not like these kind of posts where the situations mentioned are unknown to them can refrain from posting? I'm confused on what's bothering you here. Is it the fact that he mentioned her ex girlfriend having BPD or the fact that he actually mentioned having a girlfriend? Either way I think he was just trying to get whatever feeling he had out and he trusted us here by sharing it. Don't see anything wrong with that.

I still don't think it was tasteful... I doubt people would care so much for the thread (or even accepted it) if people weren't all hung up on the mental illness angle. About what you said here though; I don't think it had anything to do with mental illness. When you break up with a guy, is it not because you don't want to be with him? Depending on how long ago it was and how bad the end was, I'd be a little creeped out if there person I was trying to get away from (separate from) has now not only run into me, but has decided to make small talk with my parents in the store. This is what I mean about these posts, there's too much speculation about what is going on... so why not just not post it? Posting something like this will have some people supporting you and some people not, even if there not voicing such opinions. Look at the thread about ladies who have partners... Some gents actually spoke out that they don't like knowing, but these threads complaining/talking about girlfriends, ex girlfriends, ect... usually get the 'it's okay buddy' response quicker than anything. Seems completely hypocritical.

Hi Naomi, I understand and respect your point of view, and I happen to agree with it. My situation is a bit different - my ex GF told me that she had been diagnosed with BPD by a psychiatrist. The only reason I mentioned it in my post was to illustrate the fact that because of this, it made the relationship that much more difficult. This saddens me because I know it's not her fault; No one asks to have a mental illness. However, I feel that things may have been easier to manage if the dynamics had been different. Perhaps we may still have been together. As an aside, I work in the mental health field, so no disrespect to this population was intended. Thanks for reading.

MightyPen mentioned a very good point and I agree with him, drlove did not mention her name or any detail that would compromise her identity. He also did not blame it all on her having BPD and admitted to have made mistakes too. As for him just mentioning that just because she is not interested, that's assuming, we don't have those details and probably not even drlove does. She may be interested but hurt, perhaps a part of her does not want him to deal with the situations that her disorder caused? We can speculate many reasons but again only they know what really went on. We don't even know who ended the relationship or if it was a mutual agreement separation, etc. I do consider offensive when someone generalizes (no matter the gender or profession) claiming mental illness to be an issue like we recently saw on a thread here but the OP on this thread was talking about one particular person and if I read him right he did not accuse her of anything nor did he blame the BPD issue on the fact that she is a woman. April just shared a similar situation and I don't think men here got offended or even thought she was suggesting men's flaws are based on mental illness. As for how BPD is an important fact on his situation? Well, for what I read on this site and drlove said it didn't help make the relationship and her emotions stabled as well as it may have a connection to her reaction when saw him in the store which is what I think OP was trying to explain.

The girlfriend is completely anonymous, so the illness isn't being attributed slanderously to some specific person. And this board features discussions on topics far, FAR wider ranging than just escorts and their recommendations; the depth of the community is part of its attraction. The original post just expresses one board member's state of mind at one moment in time, and why he feels he's at that point. Maybe he's wrong about his ex. Maybe the whole story is completely invented -- we don't know. But I'm inclined to take the man at his word, and just express some sympathy for his unhappiness and for the situation he describes. I don't see the harm in just throwing the guy some support. If the claim of mental illness is a sore point, just a "hey, are you sure about that?" and measured follow-up would probably do. Just sayin'. That way everyone gets to play.

Can anybody give me an example of how or why this is an important fact (her mental illness, if such exists) that it should be broadcast publicly on an 'escort recommendation board'?? I don't think rants about ex gfs should be allowed anymore than rants about stalkers and bad clients... there's just too much one sidedness for my liking. Honestly, break ups sucks.. they hurt... but it's not a crime for someone to not like you or not want to be with you. Such a decision should be accepted just as much as someone not wanting to perform a specific sexual act. If you choose to be someone, especially if you claim to love them, that disorder (from what little I know about love) wouldn't be something you focused on. People with mental disorders already live with enough without having a partner who thinks they deserve a prize for 'living with them'. I honestly think anyway you look at it, this type of thread is better left to other boards.

Exactly, and since this happened in MY backyard (10 min from my house), I need to be extra careful! I could have easily been one of his victims! I am thankful I screen! And if someone is acting funny, or avoiding my questions, I will not see them! Simple! My life is not worth any amount of money!

You've reached a point where you're capable of direct and mature communication; she hasn't. You win.

Well, I think all the bases have been covered here, except one. You really can't afford it. The best part of visiting an SP is confidentiality. But I do recommend, if you have a wife or girlfriend.. Open up to her. Communicate what it is that turns your crank and drives you wild and you may just be surprised how flexible woman can be heck she may convey some fantasies she's been holding back and your sex life may just be better than ever. Time and time again I have men that are too shy to ask or their significant other for fetishes or domination n such and feel more comfortable with me, a stranger. It took me years to convince my shy husband to do some freaky stuff with me, now he turns himself over to me as I do him.

I personally love the sexy, sluty office worker look;) Hair in bun, glasses, office skirt just a bit shorter than it should be, stockings, and a button up blouse...with one too many buttons undone, hehehe