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JoyfulC, I understand where you're coming from, but I think the stigmatization of clients has another effect that we aren't taking into consideration here. When clients are stigmatized, and we don't fight that stigma, it can (and does) lead to their criminalization. There are lots of 'John sweeps' happening in Canada and they don't always happen in the context of outdoor/visible sex work. In Canada we seem to be moving towards a model of regulation that would criminalize the clients of sex workers, but not the sex workers themselves (known as the 'Swedish' model, because this is the system that exists in a lot of Nordik countries). It's easy to criminalize clients if society thinks they're 'gross' (etc). That's another reason why I think it's important to destigmatize clients...

I have had the pleasure to meet Clarissa on a couple of occasions and would highly recommend her. From the moment I walked into the room with her I felt welcomed and appreciated. Clarissa is a petite sexy lady with an amazing body and a desire to ensure that you enjoy every minute in her presence. Clarissa is engaging and funny and treats you like you are the only man in the world. It is very obvious that she know what she is doing and enjoys her time with you. I guarantee you that once you have met her you will want to see her again.

Considering the recent discussions here on CERB about fat/skinny body shaming, I wanted to share this amazing website that I came across today! "The Nu Project is a series of honest nudes of women from all over the world. The project began in 2005 and has stayed true to the original vision: no professional models, minimal makeup and no glamour. The focus of the project has been and continues to be the subjects and their personalities, spaces, insecurities and quirks." It is quite a remarkable collection of photographs of a wide variety of real women. It is a showcases and celebrates the beauty in ALL women's bodies, in their natural state. All unique and beautiful in their own way! :) www.thenuproject.com Enjoy!

I think this is an appropriate thread to share this on... Now, I enjoy looking at pictures of women as much as the next person (as anyone who follows the various image threads probably knows!) but it's good every so often to have a reminder about what is sometimes taking place with those images, especially in popular media. A lot of us have probably seen similar stories, but this 1 minute video really drives home the manipulation happening to showcase a particular (and near unattainable) idealized view of the female body, and the importance of reminding oneself of the variety of real beauty out there. http://www.upworthy.com/see-why-we-have-an-absolutely-ridiculous-standard-of-beauty-in-just-37-seconds

Just came to read this thread for the first time and... OUCH people! Wow is all i can say to some of these responses. I used to regularly offer 15-minute encounters when I started in the industry. A lot of guys liked it as a 'quick introduction' and would book longer the next time. They NEVER made me feel cheapened or like cum dumpster. I don't offer them regularly anymore (I don't really offer anything less than an hour) because I personally prefer longer encounters - but I would never, EVER judge someone for wanting a quick release. And I definitely would never demean a woman for offering it. If you need more than 15 minutes, great! You're in a place where many ladies specialize in longer encounters. The 'full experience' so to speak. But some guys can only afford a quick bj. Or maybe their SO is watching their time so really that's all they can fit in. ANd maybe the SP needs to money to pay her rent. If it doesn't work for you, then find what works - but why in the world are people judging and saying things like 'Okay great, glad to see people don't want these encounters'. All you're doing in insulting the people who DO, and the girls who DO offer them. And you know what? I do have one regular gent who pops in when he can for a quick BJ. I like it. He walks in, I get on my knees, and I get him off. Do you think that cheapens me? If you do, I shake my head at you, seriously. I thought this site was the place to keep it to yourself if you're not saying anything nice... well judging and insulting others for their choice of encounters is doing the exact opposite.

Not a surprising resolution, given what the throne speech had. Point 3), as stated, as elements of what the socialist party in France seems to be proposing, re. Targeting clients.

It's one thing to frame a resolution during a party convention, and quite another to actually create and enact legislation. My thinking is that nothing will happen until the court proceedings are over with, and even then I am not sure this will be a major policy priority. With all the other scandals and fires burning, I can't see this being front-and-centre for the Cons. I've been known to be wrong, though.

I did it all.... masturbated, snuggled with dogs, listen to my fav CD, did something good for another person, cried then had a tea:) Now glass of Pinot Girgio:) Thanks everyone, your so awesome!!!

Take a deep breath..and sit back.. take a break have some -me- time. Crying Feeling the blues.. is not a sign of weakness, sometimes it is a sign that you have been trying to be strong for too long.

It's taken a long time, and I still have some work to do, but learning to say "no" has saved me much time, money and aggravation: No, I won't help you paint your house No, I won't help you move No, you can't borrow $50 No, my schedule is full, I can't take on any new projects No, I do not want to mega-size my order No, I don't want to help a Nigerian prince with his $300 million inheritance No, those pants do not make you look fat No, don't stop!

I am most passionate about helping others when and where I can! Volunteering gives me great joy and I would say that is my number one passion. Nothing makes my life more fulfilling than helping others! I volunteer a lot with organizations dedicated to brain injury survivors, and when I meet each new person who is living with a brain injury whether traumatic or acquired, it reminds me to be grateful for my own life, family, and friends. Excellent topic! Xoxo

It is an event where the best to wear is what you are comfortable with... There is no such a thing as dress Code... just come have fun and enjoy a great time with friends that is what really matters :)

I too used to have a problem saying no, but after being used over and over, I have come to the realization that saying no isn't a bad thing. Not everyone is worthy or deserving of aide so I pick and choose who I give to more carefully. As far as refusing a client, if I have to for my own good then I don't feel bad, but if I have to refuse a client because I don't have an opening or time, I do feel bad. But we all have to do what we must:)

This, according to a combination of observed data and mathematical simulation, is the structure of matter in our universe -- the way mass is distributed throughout space on the very, very large scale. It's not uniform and boring; instead it's made up of unthinkably enormous filaments and clumps: This isn't a picture of the whole universe, just the small fraction that the project was able to work on and simulate. And each of those individual pixels of light? they're not stars. Each one is a GALAXY.

Please excuse my tardy response....was with my little one. I will post a real rec later tonight when I have more time....because...welll y'all gotta a wait....lol....and for all the English teachers in the room....I don't care cause my brains are still scrambled. .....and toes curled. ......(Cleo knows for anyone feeling like asking) never felt more alive and ready to contribute more to this group. Who doesn't love a girl who likes challenges... (wink...wink):-) Happy Halloween everyone......best ever for me! Additional Comments: I couldn't leave without giving a big high five to the other one for the healthy push and recommendation. Thanks again RNH Additional Comments: FUKN RGHT Cleo for Prime Minister.....

Most won't care, as it's clear from his post what he meant and the main person-Cleo- who he was thanking knows what he means so.. I think it's sweet and very nice of him to post such a truthful and flattering post. We all make spelling boboo's but we all don't thank one another enough;) Congrats to you for popping your hobby cherry and to Cleo for making it so memorable:)

Well for me gitters (or nervousness, excitement, heart pounding whatever adjectives you want to use) are all part of an encounter. If I felt no nervousness and excitement, well frankly whats the point Whether for a first time encounter or seeing a lady who is a friend for a repeat encounter I'm always excited and nervous, my hearts pounding The day that doesn't happen for me is the day I no longer see companions thats all part of encounters RG

Years ago, as a young woman in my 20s, I was standing in the packing area at a drop zone, talking to some people I didn't know. One person noted that I had a pager (we didn't have cell phones way back when), and asked me what I did for a living that I needed to carry a pager. I replied that I was a call girl. Everybody laughed and wanted to know what I really did. So I said I was an obstetrician and I was on-call. They readily bought that. Another time, a jumper's wife made a rare visit to the DZ one weekend, and was talking with us girls. At some point, we found ourselves alone and she had questions about E, another jumper. Her husband had told her that there was a prostitute jumping at the DZ, and she assumed it was E. E did her hair and applied make-up in the morning at the DZ. E wore sexy clothing and even a sexy jumpsuit. She was flirtatious. You should have seen her face when I explained that E worked for one of the hospitals in Toronto, and I was the prostitute. No one hates the damned stigmas more than I do, but I also recognize that they protect us. I don't really look or act like what people expect a prostitute to look like or act like, except when I'm in a session. My customers don't look like what most people expect customers to look like. This allows us to walk free, with invisibility cloaks, unseen and unbothered by those who might bother us if they were able to see us. Perhaps for single customers, it's more important to be able to come out and not be negatively judged for using the services of. Most of the men I've entertained over the years have been married men, men in position of trust in the businesses or communities, and for them, complete secrecy was probably more important than feeling understood by society. We know the stigma is way wrong. And we know that stigmas often are way wrong. Isn't that good enough? Many of us have had people in our lives who knew who we were, and I think we've been able to challenge some notions on a person-by-person basis. But hey! We're up against Hollywood.

I find that this picture below (from FB) does not belong to the " Funny Pictures", or " ..Lol Cat..." or " Puppies" thread, or any existing threads for that matter. It is cute, interesting, endearing and heart-warming. This thread should capture some incredible and interesting pictures you may find in the cyber space.

Happy birthday! Enjoy your special day with someone special. P.S. All ladies are special.

Happy Birthday my friend! Have a fabulous day!

One word: Masturbation Make it an event. Be good to yourself and rub those blues away.

Doctor says another month before my ribs are fully healed from my nasty fall. At least the bruising is clear. Now, back to work I go. Gently....

Happy Birthday Tom!!! Today is the first day of the rest of your life and renewed faith in beating all the negative that has been trying to beat you. To a better year and many years of pleasures ahead!! *muah*

Stare into my deep ocean dazzling blue eyes and get completely sucked into a state of bliss as I place you thoroughly at ease with my sensual massage begin and erotic bodyslides. Easy, everlasting connections are made with away as I am very playful and bubbly! Oh what fun we shall have! Let the yumminess begin. http://www.angelstouchmassage.ca/sit...rlies-profile/ Marlie XoXo Here Until 4pm 613-820-8887

Happy BIrthday !!!!! hope things are going well xoxo

I have a hard time with this too. I want to be efficient.. With SPing I just find it awkward. I know it's tough for people to put everything on the table and I'd be devastated if a girl said no to me because Im sensitive like that. It took a bad situation for me to finally realize that I am important too. I took stock of what I deserve and now I'm starting to get better.. starting to lol

Wishing you a wonderful birthday theliquor. You deserve it ! Cheers :chug:

Happy birthday! I hope you have a great day!

Many things in my opinion - I have found it has evolved and changed over the years. Right now its Animal Rescue, Music and Good Food.

My very best wishes on your birthday, theliquor. Stay strong! Best, toine

Happy Birthday theliquor - I hope its the best. The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday. Paris Hilton

The only occassions in which I have had to refuse a client is because I have a previous compromise.. being an appointment with another gentleman or a personal commitment... Simply timing does not work for both... It sucks .. but not much you can do.. you simply hope next time works better.

Happy Birthday The Liquor Enjoy your special day RG

Happy birthday Dear! Wishing you all the best Kisses xoxox

The only time I felt it necessary to refuse service to a respectful client was when someone came in whom I had encountered previously outside of work and who knew where I lived. This gentlemen did not end up asking for a massage (he came with a friend and had to rush back off to work suddenly), but if he had stayed I would have politely declined and referred him to one of our other attendants. If anything at work ever makes me feel uncomfortable, in any way, I always say no. In this case I did feel slightly guilty when I considered saying no, since he had done nothing wrong, but I am not going to provide a good experience if I feel uneasy. Similarly, I think you should realize that your inability to say no is hindering your productivity. By trying to do everything you are probably limiting your efficiency even on your most basic tasks. Don't spread yourself too thin!

I'm kind of in the same boat. I plow commercial snow, so there were storms last winter where in was out 30+ hours just ttrying to get ahead of the storm. Only difference is, if in fall asleep at the wheel of my 10ton plow... Alot more things could go wrong.

Additional Comments:

I get the feeling that this gal is hard to get together with. Anyone at all have any success yet? I'm getting such a boner loooking at her pics... I feel a trip into the city may be in the works for me soon.

Holy crap! Those VHS tapes must be worn completely through! ;)

Congratulations cdncasanova! Sounds like you picked the right lady in Cleo. I had my first (and second a few days later) experience just a couple of weeks ago with EmilyJ and it was so much better than I had expected. Leading up to the event I was extremely nervous and was half expecting to come down with a case of "Limp Noodle Syndrome" during the encounter. I had already been exchanging email with Emily so she was aware of me being new to this and that I was nervous. When I arrived at her incall place she quickly made me feel at ease and the rest of the activities just fell perfectly into place. When I left I felt like doing that Lionel Richie song "Dancing on the Ceiling" and also had a big sense of relief that not only was I able to go through with it, but that I'll be doing this many many times more. So for next time, which I hope won't be too far in the future, I am expecting/hoping for a more regular level of nervousness and excitement like roamingguy said in his post.

I did this once with a gentleman client and it was quite erotic. But it wasn't like the "on in the background" scenario as described here. It was a client from out of town who I had previously seen several times and visits when he is in Ottawa on business. We discovered that we enjoyed the same kind of porn... genuine solo female masturbation pleasure videos. Authentic non-pornstarry ladies enjoy themselves in different ways to achieve real orgasms. Stuff from quality pay websites like (for example), yanks.com, the-female-orgasm.com, abbywinters.com, ifeelmyself.com. In between appointments, we keep in contact by e-mail, and sometimes share some clips with each other that we find erotic. So one time he came to visit, we thought it would be fun to begin the session by watching a few of these videos together. He booked a couple hours, and we started like that, cuddling up close together on the bed with a laptop, caressing and massaging each other, talking and enjoying the videos. It was actually very erotic, and made me verrry excited. :) But after a few clips to warm up, the laptop went away and our full attention was on each other. I think this is different than in the "background", and of course to each their own, but I don't think I would like that. I've visited a few outcalls where the lad had the TV on in the background and I noticed a few times when I went to make eye contact during a BJ, his eyes were on the TV. Lame. It should be an an all-sensory experience and being distracted takes away from it all. So obviously, for me, I agree that all my senses are involved in the act... And I love the little things like the sounds of breathing and a soft sigh... the sound of wetness and licking, watching the pleasure on my partners face as he watches me lick his hard cock from the base to the tip... and so on. I think that "lady magazines" suggest adding porn to the mix for married folks because they already know everything there is to know about each other in bed, so it comes a time where you want to try introducing new things in the bedroom, and maybe for some, porn is one of these things to try. When visiting an SP, there is still the element of newness and excitement, so there is not often a need to "spice it up", because it's already quite spicy. Also, a concern I might have with just throwing on some generic porn in the background with a partner I don't know too well, with no real discussion about it prior, is that he might feel some kind of need to live up to whatever is going on in the porn.. and maybe feel inadequate because the guy has a massive cock, or the girl in the video is unrealistically wailing like a dying cat... while I am not the fake moan kind of gal. Also, he might get ideas from the porn about things he should do, and I am not into just continuous jack-hammering penis-in-vagina penetration, which is most of what common porn is. Boring. So, I do think it can be possible for it to be enjoyable in certain circumstances in an SP/Client encounter. If a gent has a specific fantasy of watching porn with a lady and his wife isn't interested, then why not. Also maybe for a mutual masturbation fantasy it could be hot too. Kind of off topic, but I've always has a fantasy of like a "ladies' sleepover" kind of thing... where someone puts on an erotic video and all the gals whip out some toys and masturbate together. Hot. :) hehe.

Ok, now I have to go find my damn Hitachi. :ThankYou:

Yes, in fact I think it's key to making your point. If you just say "they're like regular guys you see on the street!" then people just mentally downgrade guys on the street. It's easy when you don't know the people being invoked. But when you mention brother, father, etc. then you're saying "they're like the guys you care about." I think that conveys the message much more effectively -- clients aren't just "regular" people, they're good people. Thanks again for raising this topic -- it's a brilliant subject for discussion here.

Thanks for starting this thread, Nat. In answer to your question, basically i tell people, when the opportunity arises, is basically this, in one way, shape or form:

Yes, it is.

Just clicking through that... the one thing that really gets me is how damn happy they all look. It's really nice to see pics of normal looking people who seem to be having a good time, rather than the usual airbrushed pouty-looking trying-to-be-seductive thing that you see so much of...

Ahhh, the ?tipping? debate! I noticed there was a decided void in SP response so I will take a minute to share my thoughts? From an agency girl perspective, tipping is often a way to generate extra income because after they pay the agency and the driver, they usually end up on the short end of the stick. 10 years ago, I ran for an agency, we collected $260 for an hour, with $110 going to the house, $40-$100 to the driver depending on where the visit was located, which left me maximum of $110 with as little as $10 in my pocket. With a $15 book on fee and mandatory car cell phone fees of $25 per night, I needed 3 full fees per night to make working worthwhile, God forbid I get credit card calls, which somehow always worked out us getting nothing. We were not allowed to refuse a call so we had to find creative ways to ensure we were paid. Tipping for extra service was the only way to keep our heads above water. The nice thing was that we had a shift, we worked, and we went home and had a life. That said, it was unfair to the guest who would end up with less than what he expected because he was not prepared for the extra fees. Independents are in a slightly different boat. We usually have a higher upfront fee, but we also assume ALL the costs incurred, which is far more than many realize. If we charged what we feel we should to get our ROI, the protests would be heard long and loud. Many Indies have a smaller bottom line than an ambitious girl at a well run agency. So when it comes to tips, many things need to be considered. In the south, SP's are tipped much in the same manner as a restaurant. Anyone walking a restaurant wouldn?t consider walking out without leaving a tip if everything was satisfactory. I tip everyone in the service industry, from the girl who washes my hair, to the man at Suny?s who pumps my gas because a little bit from many adds up at the end of the day. Flowers and trinkets are lovely in thought, but a girl can?t deposit wilted stems into an RRSP, and my bank doesn?t seem to take dildos, massage oil, garter belts or silk stockings on deposit -go figure! As Joyful C has so wisely stated, most SP?s live a fragile existence financially. We provide an illusion of playful luxury for our guests benefit, but rest assured, 90% of the time it is smoke and mirrors. Behind the scenes we struggle to pay our bills, put diapers on our babies and try to take care of those we love, all the while working on a way to get to a normal existence if that does in fact even exist. An extra $20 from each client equals a full appointment by the end of the week, and at the end of the month that pays the cell phone, buys the groceries and lets us take the little ones away for the weekend after we have paid both rents (home and incall), all our advertising, babysitters, hydro, car repairs, personal maintenance and the same expenses everyone else has. Not to mention the monthly payments on augmentation, lifts, tucks and anything else to keep us up to the exceptionally high standards expected if we want to continue making money in this arena. There are few SP?s who can keep up the daily client service to ensure long term financial viability in this business because of the emotional and physical toll this business extracts which sometimes means extended time offs to get our heads, hearts and bodies back in order. We have no paid holidays, benefits or paid personal days. If there is a crisis that forces us to take time off, we lose money and clients which often means we work regardless of illness, pain or any other of lifes challenges. Each SP has her own reasons for working, but the universal element is that we all are trying to achieve some sort of financial stability. I never expect tips, and I can count on one hand how many I have received since my arrival in Canada because of the nature of the business here. Hate to tell you guys, but Canadian men are not known for their generous nature, they rank a close second to Germans in this realm (I think the outlandishly high taxes inflicted in both countries has something to do with it!). I would never expect a tip from guests that have me on retainer, I see them weekly. But unless you are going to be a bankable commodity in a SP?s life, a tip relative to the quality of service is a sure way to say thank you and have her know you mean it... Catherine