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Interesting thread, thank you for starting it! :) As someone who has recently started offering massage services, I am very interested to hear what massage lovers prefer. I've been using a high quality cold pressed organic virgin coconut oil. It has wonderful properties, texture and consistency, and the scent is super mild and barely there, because it's totally natural. I also warm it up on the stove before using it, to make it even more enjoyable. I just love it, and I've had great feedback so far. I keep a few other various options on hand, and am open to suggestions, but so far the coconut oil has been a hit. It's amazing for the skin, including mine, after using my body to rub it all over my subject. ;) It's also totally edible (wink wink) and actually even good for you.

Hey ladies what is a major turn off when someone is looking to book a time with you ? One thing I absolutely hate is when someone texts me and says....What's up? Like really lol that will not grab my attention First impressions mean everything and I prefer a gentlemen being respectful and courteous when inquiring about my ......... For an example; Hello how are you or Hi I am .... and I am interested in knowing more about you and your ........!......so much better

Hey baby How are you hun? Where are you located bb? Hun-baby-darling-bb-babe-sweetie-cutie at EVERY sentence from someone I NEVER met It litteraly makes me aggressive! I hate that!! Please take note that a: hey sweetie from someone I know its different!! Lol

As in all things, there are people that read and hear what they want to, and assume automatically that good looks get you free fries, or a ticket to the Jays game with VIP seats, or a BBBJ. (But not all at once. Ketchup in your hair smells like a chip stand at the CNE.) I don't understand why a BBBJ is so important. There are things that can be done with a man's body that hasn't even got names yet. And rightfully so. A Ducati is a great bike! Everybody loves Ducatis. But if all you do is Ducatis, each and every time you ride, over and over, you might secretly covet a midnighter on a Black Shadow. But Vincent types are not what the boys on ERB are talking about, so back you go. Funny how they never write about pegging, or nipple sucking, or licking the armpit, or biting behind the neck, or a 1000 other uniquely erotic inventions for the lover in all of us. They really should watch Fight Club more often. Don't wear another man's name on your underwear, and don't love a woman like you're told. Anyway. They say that a BBBJ feels better, but realistically, with a blindfold (one of my very favorite flavours), most people can't tell the difference between bar mixes. The reason that they will never do a BBBJ with a blindfold is because its a thrill. It's like screaming 200 kmph on the 401, sweating bullets, and sure, sorta, you are immortal, and it's your life. My evil twin wants to mutter that if you want a thrill, there are providers just itching to try some surprises that even Tyler Durden hadn't thought of. If - and this is a big if - you go off the grid and let her show you paradise. Yes or no? An opinion - hopefully an educated one. I liked FortunateOne's commentary that it's really for the client to confirm the escort's preferences - "safe" is a pretty straightforward word. Trusting us to make it matter is our job. Thanks for listening to my rant!

Some great points have been made regarding the "before and during" part of the encounter: contacting the lady by her preferred method and including the info she requires, impeccable hygiene, respecting her and her restrictions, handing her the envelop at the beginning of the encounter without having her ask for it, etc. For me, it goes a little further than that; although I have enjoyed my time with a patron and really like spending time in his company, I still expect him to respect our intimate professional arrangement (this is a NO strings attached business relationship) meaning that I do not want to feel obliged and have to correspond with him daily or weekly to catch up on everything in between appointments. Once in a while is all good but there needs to be a realistic limit. On a same note, I really appreciate it when a patron doesn't try to change the terms of our arrangement: we might have established a great NSA relationship that works for the both of us during our scheduled time together but it still doesn't mean that I want to see you "off the clock", so please, do not put me in a position where I have to decline your request.

Oh, I know what you mean lol I even created an ad for it some time ago: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=123724 I look at it on the bright side though: it makes my screening much easier/faster that way and I don't hesitate to mark the email as spam and then gladly send it to the trash folder :) u know sweet baby darlin'... coz im a buzy gurl i dont w8ste my time, evar ;) lol

- If the ATM is located at a bank, walk inside and grab some envelopes off their counter tops. - Keep a few envelopes in your car or at your office. They don't take up much place. ;) - How can a piece of paper be big & hard to carry, since it folds up very easily & very small. It doesn't have to be wrinkle free, just filled with good money. lol - Buy yourself a box of envelopes. They're cheap. - Use a piece of 8"by11" paper and fold it around the bills so that it looks like an envelope. Works just as good. - To the CVS, etc. & spend a buck on a Thank you card. It comes with an envelope. :) - Plan ahead to have your money and envelope before the day of your tryst. I hope this helps & makes you smile on how easy and how many options Gents have if they just ... Plan ahead when you want head!!!! ;)

It has nothing to do with a desire to be "classy" and everything to do with safety and discretion for both the client and the SP. If ever there was a situation whereby law enforcement became involved, it would not be possible to deny payment for what was going on if there is a pile of bills laying on the dresser. However it is possible when in a card, an envelope or a gift bag. This way, you are simply two consenting adults and you - the SP - can claim ignorance as to knowing what was inside, which protects BOTH parties. Using a card, envelope or gift bag just makes sense.

Just a dumb question. But if you want a BBBJ then why book an encounter with a companion who offers only a CBJ? It seems simple and just common courtesy. Respect the lady's boundaries, don't ask for something she doesn't offer A rambling RG

I think I've had all the stuff out there used on me and my preference is a good quality Massage Oil like Biotone. The stuff is about $13 for 8 oz or $54 a gallon and is available locally. Their lotion is also good. A number of MAs use baby oil and I hate it !! Some even use the scented stuff which smells like hell for the rest of the day! Although the unscented stuff doesn't smell, you still can't get rid of it unless you have 2 showers. I also get a rash from baby oil for some reason !! If you figure out the price of a gallon of baby oil you may find that good massage oil, or lotion if you prefer, is probably around the same price !! The massage oil is very slippery and is water soluble so cleanup is a breeze. It just plain gives a better massage. I don't mind unscented baby oil for the finish if that's what the MA prefers but not for the massage. If I visit an MA that I enjoy and she uses baby oil I will bring a bottle of Biotone on my second visit. Some switch and others just save the bottle of massage oil for my future visits :) My 2 cents, from a customer's perspective.

Watching my lawn turn green as the rain gently falls on it . Love how everything is being renewed! :)

I don't see this as a stupid question at all... As a client who has asked for an extension in the past, I have paid the 1 hour rate before and the discounted extra time rate before. So using your scenario, I have paid the 400 and once had to pay an extra 200 and another time the 150.you are the provider, it's your discretion. Myself, as a client, am not expecting special treatment for an extension, I expect to ask, and pay what you tell me... as long as I can afford it lol. A ramble... But I hope it helps!

I agree Savannah. It is more discrete to have the money presented in something but after a recent experience might I suggest counting it before the client leaves. I usually always count mine when the client is in the washroom, on his phone or at some other discrete time, this time I waited until hours after my client left and he shorted me, he did message me the next day with an I'm sorry, thought your website said $$. Now discrete or not I'm counting it in front of my client so there is no misunderstandings. Anyway, since it is still legal to pay for sex why the worry of law enforcement? If paying for sex does become an issue once you've accepted the money, after it's been counted, your caught. I may be wrong but just having the money present causes presumptions by the law.

Hear, hear for coconut oil, it is marvelous for massage, and it is quite versatile: one can use it for cooking and baking as well! Best, toine

Part of my story (as most of my struggles now are not my own): I spent about about 8 years being physically, psychologically and sexually abused by members of my immediate and extended family. Somehow, and I do not know how, at 12 I managed to summon the inner strength to put an end to it. Although I did not tell anyone about what was happening to me (although I'm positive there were many adults that knew and did nothing) nor seek help for many years, the abuse affected me physically and emotionally well into adulthood and has definitely shaped the person I am today. Although I am now successful, educated, liberal, open-minded, caring and forgiving, there is no room or tolerance in my life for anything bad happening to children (even in movies I have to walk away) or the adults that cause these bad things. Over thirty years later I'd like to say I've learned a few things. One is that what you name something, what you call it, matters. Maybe only on a subconscious level but often on a visceral in your face level. My opinion only, but "sexual abuse of a minor" is far too vague and low impact to correctly describe what happens to these children and the impact it has on them. Let's call it what it really is RAPING CHILDREN! A harsh term but more accurate. I am aware that for some abuse is a cycle, they were abused so they abuse. For most it is not. Most are so affected by what happened to them that even the thought of causing that much pain to another can make them sick. The difference could be whether or not they get help, or their own inner strength or moral compass, or the nurturing they received in their lives apart from the abuse. Or it may be simply that it is not called rape so they don't make the connection to what they are doing and what it really is and the effects it will have. I may be totally wrong but if it even stops one abuser and saves one child... My journey continues.

Some off the cuff ramblings Don't ask questions which are answered in the lady's website. Be on time, pay the donation in full up front. Also consider giving the lady a tip and gift Respect the lady's boundaries. Don't ask for services she doesn't offer Have something to drink when she arrives (wine, beer, water etc) You can always email and ask her what she likes. Maybe have some hors d'oeuvres too Think of writing a recommendation after a good encounter. Doesn't have to be a Pulitzer Prize essay, just a few lines saying you had a good time with the lady, she arrived on time etc etc etc Contact the lady using her preferred method of contact Many ladies utilize verification/screening. Be open and honest with the lady, providing the requested information. And always ask your reference's permission before using her as a reference Just a quick few ramblings RG

A clean bbbj is an oxymoron. Mouths are notoriously full of all kinds of microscopic wigglies. There are many providers to choose from who offer the service; many of them will be std/sti free but you can't tell who is and who isn't. There is no "on the spot" test to see if at this moment something lurks in her throat. Christy is right, this is something you have to educate yourself on. Speak with your doctor, read the public health information and then think on the best choice for your situation. What I will suggest is that when you find the provider, don't ask "Are you clean?". It's not a good way to start off an experience. My second suggestion is that when the "Oh my God, what have I done?" wave hits you afterwards, don't contact your provider asking if you should go get tested... cat

The reasons will probably be as varied as the providers. One reason might be because the sp feels it more discrete to discuss them one on one. I post my rates on my site but seldom do I in my ads. I want men to view my site before they book with me. After all, the point of setting up a site is to inform potential clients of my rates. services, how best to contact me and a little insight into my personality. So prior to contacting me they'll be informed. It does seem lately though an effort for a lot of men to take a minute to read , lol. In the end every sp advertises in her own special way, frustrating or not, she/he has chosen to do it for their reasons, which are important to them, so they should be respected. I have one service that I'll only give the rate via phone. I'm picky about who I offer this service to and want to speak to the potential client first. I prefer this for all my services, as talking to someone can give you much more insight than an email or text, imo. So inconvenient or not this is the way I want it:)

One other option to consider for paying is email money transfer. It's quick, paperless, no concerns about carrying a large amount of cash. I know for the ladies I see now, if they employ it, I pay the donation that way. Just a thought RG

I don't mind texting at all as long as it's respectful and conversational. I don't even mind a simple "when are you available?" I do, however hate the "rates location" type. If I am feeling generous, I will respond with my web address but I usually won't bother responding. I hate talking on the phone and avoid it as much as possible. I really get turned off by guys that assume that we must all do drugs. Ya wanna party type conversations, whether email text or voice get an immediate ignore from me.

I would hope that if a lady has an advertised 3 hour rate posted on her website (or ad) that she charges exactly that. As per your example, $550 total and not $600. It has happened to me many times in the past where a gentleman reserved my time for 3 hours and inquired, before we got together, about the possibility of extending. I always told him/them to have my 3 hour donation in one envelop and the difference in a second envelop; if my donation was $850 for 3 hours and $1050 for 4, to have an extra $200 in a separate envelop. Spur of the moment extensions? Same principal regarding rates, at least for me. A discounted rate (less than what I advertise) because of a last minute extension? I don't see why...

I know who mine are... SexxxyRebecca comes to mind right away! And there is one more... Who I'm sure will know when she reads this, but unfortunately, I will not mention her name. But I highly recommend SexxxyRebecca, if you haven't been to see her... You must!

lol, me too. I don't know how many times i've just said, oh, sorry, not available the minute i hear that kind of thing. Also they say it in what i call 'sexy voice', so it really grates on the nerves. This is not a dating site, I snap, from time to time, you don't have to sexy voice me to impress me. it creeps me out, and makes me question why they are calling in the first place lol. I'd advise not using sexy voice and not calling any sp sweetie, hun, babe, and/or babeeee

I feel the same way...I don't take the.donation.in hand I prefer for them to leave it on my drawer so.it doesn't feel.so business like

I have done a ton of duos over the years.. and many of my colleagues are BBBJ preferential. They do love the taste of cock without the condom. BUT the most frequently advertised condom is Trojan.. and they are the worst goddam tasting and smelling condoms on the planet. I would never ever ever use one for a BJ. I used to use flavoured ones and loved the variety of flavors.. strawberry and banana being my favorite. I've even encouraged clients who lament that their wives won't blow them to encourage them to play with a flavored one to get them into a different head space. Now however I just use Lifestyles. They come in L sizes too.. only use lubricated as unlubed have a stupid powder on them of some sort. They have zero taste to my sensitive palate anyway.. and I love using them as I feel 100% safe in my activities While risk of BBBJ is obviously less than BBFS.. it's always there and while people get tested.. you're only as safe as the last person you had an encounter with. Too much risk for my sanity. The reason guys ask CBJ escorts if they're open to BBBJ is because they believe that lady is seeing less clients for BBBJ and is therefore more 'clean'. They consider themselves one of the few she will offer this too and therefore less chance of risk. I used to have a client pressure me constantly for this for an extra fee and came right out and admitted this was his M.O. I finally got tired of it and refused his appts eventually. He literally pulled this every single session. It became mentally exhausting for me. Now.. having said that. I don't begrudge someone asking in the heat of the moment briefly.. so long as they let it go as a wistful wish. I will then incorporate their wish into a sexy roleplay talk. Let's face it.. while sex feels really good.. it's 90% between the ears.. the dirty talk about the risky behaviour is often hotter than the actual behaviour and you don't leave wondering if you're safe.

stupid question but I need to ask ... "at her regular rate" her regular rates are: 1hr 200 2hrs 400 3hrs 550 client books 2hrs for 400$ There was a complete and satisfying 2hr date At the end of the 2hrs he asks for another hour. will he be expected to pay 150$ or 200$ ?

I am bothered by the text messaging as well. I don't respond to them and I don't respond to one line emails either - if I can delete your email just as fast as it took for you to write it out... I don't think you and I will have good chemistry. Another one that bothers me: When he says he read my web site and than asks me questions that are clearly answered on my site

It makes me uncomfortable too... So usually if I don't see it or he makes no mention of it before the festivities start I will say something like "we should take care of business first" I don't like my dates to feel like an appointment so when I see the donation and he hands me the donation.. that's what it feels like. I don't date in my personal life so maybe that's why lol .... my own little fantasy I guess .... the BFE experience

I personally don't know what a clean bbbj is? If someone is afraid of catching.something then they shouldn't even consider bbbj or bbfs Because yes in this day and age herpies does exsist and we all take risk hell we are.human but if you are worried then my advice to you would be to practice safe sex I understand a bbbj probably does feel much better but so does a cbj(I have.never had a complaint)

I do prefer calling over text of course and will Not book and.confirm.through text but if texting me please at least be respectful especially when making first contact It's funny not.long after I posted this a had a young guy text me ...hey Wats up girl! Lolol no thanks

I have had one gentlemen ask me for change lol which was only a $10 bill...he was young and probably tight for cash but it was a little embarrassing having to change it ... I was kind of taken back when he asked...but hey its his money and I defiantly had no problem changeing it for him. I would just recommend you come with the exact amount to avoid anyone feeling any way

I don't do erotic massage, but for bound up muscles and soft skin, garden variety Lubriderm Unscented is quite nice. It is non greasy, adsorbs quickly, and seems to retain that moist feel for 24 hours. For truly dry, scaly, this-is-not-me skin, such as dry heels and elbows, you can find a product called Melkfett in European food stores. It's by Ombra. It is extremely oily, and you only need a bit, and it will last 6 months. It contains calandula and other ingredients, and if you are exercising outdoors a thin layer is nice on the face.

I also use biotone unscented massage gel (it comes in gel, lotion or oil) and have repeatedly received compliments on it. You can purchase it at simply therapy (a massage store in the east end) By the gallon and also a pump for easier dispensing of it into smaller squeeze bottles. They also sell very nice, soft white massage bed sheets that are much better then then typical towel over the bed idea. Goodluck and have fun testing out all the products ;-) Roar!

After a lot of research, trial and error, if I need to use a product I use Bon Vital Massage Gel. It has the workability of an oil and sinks into the skin like a lotion. It's also all natural with jojoba and you can actually lick it without your tongue going numb (many massage products have an additive that does this). The product is unscented and water dispersible.

I think a number of sps like the envelope, and a lot of clients as well. Me, not so much, but i don't think either way is righter or wronger or classier or trashier, just what they happen to prefer. (in other words if i get the donation in an envelope, i don't give it back to them and say take it out and give it to me proper lol) And i hope the enveloped sps don't worry too much if the client wants to take out his wallet and count it out one bill at a time. I think what makes a good client is someone i don't have to ask twice (let alone 3 or 4 times) for the fee after it has been confirmed in person. The other thing is common courtesy, I write as I sit here at 4:08, ready for an appt because someone said they wanted to come by at 4pm. No call to say they can't make it, no call to say they are running late. No call means not courteous, and not letting me get on with my day.

I've never been a fan of the envelope system. I sometimes wonder "Is it just full of Canadian Tire money?" and take a peek, just to be safe..lol I guess some people find it less, crass and feel it's classier? I don't know. As long as you don't show up with a ziploc full of loonies, or whip out your wallet and count it out into my hand (that's a mood killer), I'm fine with no envelope. Kim

Just heard this one earlier and I felt like I had just heard the secret for happiness and I think I kind of did ... 'Be the best person you can be.' I think by doing so you can have a peaceful life knowing that yes, not everything you do is right, that you may hurt someone or make mistakes that resulted in something bad happening but not having done it intentionally makes all the difference :) If only all of us would follow that advice and those of us who do would stop blaming ourselves or stressing out for things we couldn't control, at least not entirely the world would definitely be a much happier place .. Let's try!! Additional Comments: PS. I think we have to start by being the best person we can be with ourselves in order for us to be like that with others :)

SexyLacy, Emily J, and Christycurves... together you have pretty much summed up all a man needs to know to enter into and fully appreciate the interactions between himself and his chosen partner. We, the gentlemen, should all aspire to be the "Mr Wonderful" Lara described in her blog. Thank you Lacy for launching this thread and thank you Emily J for contributing such an excellent find in the blogpost.

My checklist- honesty-you expect it so please give it. punctuality- I am, so please be. discretion-I give it, protect it, so please show me the same . Respect- not just when we are together, but continue to after we part, I will. I think the rest has been covered;)

I am one who is not very good at providing dirty talk. I am practicing and getting better but it's not something I am great at. Now that being said, when a man does it to me? Oh fuck... "Mind fucking", as I call it, has been known to send me into wave over wave of orgasm. If I am engaged in intercourse with someone and they start talking dirty to me... Im over the top in no time!!!!

I love dirty talk no matter the format. I will say that since starting out as an SP my written dirty talk has increased while my verbal has decreased. I know part of the reason is that when I am with someone who is not very verbal or vocal, I restrain myself. I know there have been times it has been requested of me and the person had been so quiet that I had forgotten until halfway through. The more open someone is to me, the more comfortable I feel being expressive about needs, wants and desires. I feed off others so there is a lot of giving and receiving. It IS rather difficult to talk with my mouth full however you can be almost guaranteed that as I worship you I have thoughts running through my head about the taste and hard silkiness of your cock gliding over my tongue, forcing it's way into my throat and making me moan in need. And when you react to me with words or noises I'm panting in my mind for the reactions I'm causing and my lady bits are throbbing in anticipation.

I will echo Fortunateone's posts. I'm a CBJ only provider. I do duos with many colleagues who are BBBJ providers. I put the condom on when I am performing.. they take it of when they are. My comfort is paramount during an appt in order for me to perform at my best.. and as for CBJ being 'useless'. I don't take offense.. that is the opinion of several who haven't experienced a great CBJ. There are literally 1000's of happy customers in my wake who can say they not only enjoyed it but didn't leave wondering if they were safe or not. This is not to dismiss my many friends and colleagues who partake in BBBJ. The risks are low.. but they are still there.. or why get tested at all? As for trusting the clients to get tested regularly? few do.. believe me.

Now i need to go shopping ;) lol

Gentlemen would be astounded by the number of men who ask for change back but in my experience it's usually for the lower priced encounters. When I worked for an agency in Atlanta, they had appointments priced at 15 minute increments. Almost without fail, the client would arrive with $20's and want the $10/$5 change. At first I would scramble to give it, sometimes counting out quarters to ensure they got it; then the agency owner clued me in that it wasn't my responsibility to ensure they have the correct change. The clients knew the agency policy and were told on the phone to arrive with the exact amount but because I was new, they took advantage of my inexperience. I remember thinking to myself while giving it to them "If you can't afford to tip me 5/10$ then you can't afford to be paying for pussy; get your priorities straight!". Some peoples children... cat

Any intimate activity with anyone, be it a professional companion, bar pick up, girlfriend/CL/wife ALL carry an element of risk...celibacy, well masturbation is the only safe sex and no, not being glib here Condoms are not risk elimination, they are risk reduction As Cat pointed out, never ask a companion if she is clean, and don't ask the lady if you have a morning after panic attack if you should be tested YOUR SEXUAL HEALTH IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY...you should get tested regularly if you are sexually active One more thing, while there is an element of risk in being sexually active, even if using safe sex practices, celibacy while safe (sex wise that is) carries something else IMHO far more unhealthy...and that is loneliness...and I am speaking from experience Anyhow, a rambling RG

Pick a girl you are attracted to , review her site for her services then contact her:) But fears are going to hold you back from full enjoyment. So educate yourself, and well. There are many sites you can find reliable information about std's and how they can and won't be transmitted. Read up, or have an open frank discussion with your MD. Remember anything you tell your doctor is private and I think it's best when any of us are going to have more than one sexual partner that our doctors know as they are the best ones for health discussions. Nothing is 100% but most responsible and professional sp's take great pride in their health and taking care of their bodies:) I hope you find what you're looking for and that you can relax and thoroughly enjoy it:)