Leaderboard

I'm going to be blunt and I'm sure quite a few of you will get your jockeys in a bunch, but it needs to be said. 1. No one cares who you are. The majority of you are not high-profile enough to matter. 2. The paranoia around us getting hacked or your info leaked because we lost our phone or some other ridiculous scenario you come up with to avoid taking responsibility for your own actions (eg. contacting s ex workers) is so entitled to me. Has an escort ever been hacked in the history of the internet? NOPE. 3. You can't have it both ways; you can't expect us to provide high level customer service like remembering little details about your life, interests, etc and not expect us to keep info. 4. If you think we're going to extort you or some other malicious action, you need to seriously re-evaluate how you think about s ex workers and your participation in this industry. 5. Your privacy, your personal life, your marriage--none of that trumps my safety. My life is on the line when I invite men into my space. It is not my responsibility to make sure that your wife doesn't find out, or your children or your boss or whoever. 6. It is in my best interests to keep your info private and secure, my reputation and business is on the line. All of which is to say, give us the info we ask for, or move along, but quit whining about it. *drops mic*

Thanks everyone for an entertaining read... Of course the bottom line here, as has already been pointed out a few times, is that you are either okay giving more detailed personal information or you aren't. Yea or Nay Arguing the reasons why a companion chooses to have certain specifications in order to spend time with her is not accomplishing anything. A lady chooses her rules and what she's okay with and that's that. I'm not even going to go into reasons why saying shit like "if she wants your real info you should have hers, too" is skewed logic at it's best. If you don't understand why you're being obtuse, me adding yet another explanation is hardly going to enlighten you. I get that guys want to protect their privacy just as much as the ladies do. But again: if you don't like the way a lady handles her business, then find someone who is more suited to you. No need to try to use weird logic to justify your stance. Move on to another companion whose expectations and requirements are at a level you are willing to meet. Wow! Rocket science! Okay kids, let's all make nice and go about our lives.

Eric, with all due respect, you can guesstimate, assume, analyze, deduct all you want but the fact remains that you are not an SP and have no clue about the effectiveness of our screening methods, and what IS or is not, or what could be, or not, more effective, as a client of SPs. We screen and ask for real names because it HAS proven to be effective. We don't just go through all the trouble of screening and having those policies just because it looks good on a website. I can tell you from personal experience that asking for real names, aside from other information, HAS saved me from a few potential bad dates. Ladies know what is best for them, what works for them, know how to screen and do many other things... and I think clients should stay out of their business no matter how much they think they know about the industry and no matter how long they have been a "hobbyist".

Extortion would not happen from an established provider who cares about her name, brand, reputation and about all the hard work she has invested over time to get where she is. Doing so (extortion) would be committing business suicide, plain and simple.

Oh Berlin, this is why I admire you so much! Callin' it as it is. I'm 100% with Berlin on this. Sorry guys, but she's bang-on: you just aren't important enough to be a target for any extortion or hacking. We don't give a crap about your profile or status in society, we give a damn about our own safety and how you conduct yourself while you are with us. You can be a cash-strapped student who saved up for two months to visit us, or a wealthy executive and you'll get the exact same treatment and will be held accountable to meet the same guidelines and expectations each of us lays out for our clients to abide by. It's not about you. Truly, we don't care enough one way or the other about you beyond ascertaining if you will be a gentlemen during our time together. It's about us making sure we feel safe and whatever precautions we put in place to create that feeling of safety.

Well screening with the sole method of name verification is certainly not effective, and it would be silly to simply rely on that. I have never heard of a lady using such basic screening. It's quite patronizing to suggest that this is what we do. As you just said, polite communication and positive vibe makes all the difference. And yes, we do have methods to know your real name without verifying your ID on site. The thread is about name divulgation, not general screening. Now if you want to talk about stats and psychopath, note that between 1% and 3% of male population suffers from this personality disorder. However, I concede that the majority of them won't necessarily turn to physical or psychological violence. Yet *IT HAPPENS*, and not always from a clinically diagnosed freak. I didn't invent these numbers, you can easily look it up yourself. I understand your ignorance as it is not your life that is on the line. Especially if you take such offence every time a woman speaks about male violence. Having a real name won't tell you much about a person's state of mind, but you are right: relying on our gut feeling and intuition is our best tool at the end of the day. How do I use your real name? 1. Hotel: To make sure that you have indeed make a reservation at the hotel and this is not a simple prank; 2. Google: If I Google your name and news article appear regarding your recent liberation from a 10 years sentence that you got for killing your wife (yes, this actually happened to me), I won't see you. 3. Social media: If I look you up on FB, IG, Twitter, etc. and that you are a devil worshiper and are into ritual sacrifices (yes, I got that too), I will most likely not see you as well. 3. Blacklist: if your names pops on one of the verification sites for bad clients - not necessarily as a psychokiller - but lets say just as a time waster, I won't see you.

Congrats to the Sens on winning tonight, our top scorers have to show up on Friday night they have being pretty quiet so far.

Reality is that most gentlemen who see companions are respectful people who would never hurt an escort. The reality is also that bad apples exist everywhere and not just in this industry. For some reason, this industry seems to attract some of the less desirables... The reality is that we screen to the best of our abilities to avoid those bad apples as much as we can by using various methods. Reality is that some of us are passionate about this topic because it is an issue that involves our own physical well-being, safety and lives. No one is being verbally bludgeoned. We are simply trying to show you the reality we deal with when we accept to see a new patron. And it's the best way to go.

I have a real name for those who needs a reality check. Bradley Barton. Bradley Barton was recently found NOT guilty of killing an prostitute by letting her vaginally bleeding to death after, and I quote "rough sex". Bradley Barton is a free man. Hell, as far as I know he could be here posting on this very thread! This world is full of Bradley Barton. He is not an exception. Now before I hear someone wining that not all men are the same, let me tell you something: If "losing" the business of a hundreds clients gives us the chance to avoid only ONE Bradley Barton, we win big time. There is no lost here. Two-way street my ass. Boner vs Murder.... Read the full article here: http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2015/03/30/cindy-gladue-protests-bradley-barton-not-guilty_n_6966806.html

Perhaps a different perspective will help with this "two way street" debate. Couple questions: How many escorts or providers have been killed, stalked, threatened, beaten, blackmailed etc. from a client? That is to present time with no real names being utilized. How many clients have been in the same position from an escort? Some providing real names. If a providers real name is out there, . what do you think the increase rate for harassment or other negative behavior might be? A real name links to FB or an address, real phone number, info on kids, job, parents etc? How many other may be on the receiving end of negative behavior from being connected to someone now known to be doing this? How many may have an impact via schooling, another job, losing a job etc? Many ladies work from hotels or an Incall location. They keep business separate from personal usually for a number of reasons. MY point is that saying it is a two way street and that a client having a real name is the same as a provider having a real name and being NO big deal is absurd. If it was really no big deal, this would be a legitimate business, acceptable as any other form of work, fully accepted by society with no stigma attached, would receive rights and benefits afforded regular workers and not be the focus of so many people wanting to out, save, slam etc. This is the point, it IS a big deal to many of us. If it's not a big deal to you, great, find those who agree with you but at least acknowledge that it can and is a big deal to many.

Check out this link http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/henry-rayhons-acquitted-of-sexual-abuse-of-wife-an-alzheimer-s-patient-1.3045185 Western society is soo weird about sex. Nursing home roomie was uncomfortable,deal with that. How could it go to a prosecution?

I don't need external scientific studies to be conducted to know, for a fact, as an SP with experience, that my screening methods work and have saved me from a few potential bad dates because of the person(s) contacting me. I also know that I'm not the only one. Implying nothing has happened to me or others because of the luck of the draw and so-called superstition is insulting at best. Anyway, I'm done. Cheers

I replied on here before with this issue, but I really agree with how Berlin put this! Storms off stage furious!

Absolutely. I'm not concerned about anyone deliberately disclosing contact information or anything like that; I'm more concerned about what happens when a lady loses her phone, or puts the Facebook app on her work phone (you *do* all know what happens when you do that, don't you?), or a third party gets in and goes on a fishing expedition. Call me paranoid if you like... but that's why Phaedrus has his own email and phone number. Also: I'd love to assume that anyone we give any contact details to will be professional, responsible and discreet and delete them when they're done with, but... unfortunately this world contains quite a lot of people who are unprofessional, irresponsible and indiscreet. Some of them are involved in this industry, on both sides. Reminders don't hurt :)

It's been mainly the guys on the 3rd and 4th lines doing the scoring... The top lines will have to eventually. But that will happen sooner or later.

Live another day... Woohoo... Actually scored and held the lead... Roll on to the next game!

too true, this is why we ask for names, the hotels require that when we call to verify you, the HOTEL will ask for the name of the party you are trying to reach. I don't know why guys don't get this. But when a lady calls into the hotel to verify you are actually there, the hotel does ask us this information. Too many times, in my early days, I have been told to go to a hotel only to find out the person was not there.

I already said it in this thread, but I feel that it is important to say it again: As a Kingston Escort, 95% of my business comes from BP. I repeat: 95% of my business comes from BP. And I must not be the only one!Therefore, implying that BP only/mostly has fake ads, bait and switch etc... is putting fear in potential clients, strongly suggesting them to stay away from girls who advertise there. Meaning to stay away from girls like me. Only about 5% of my clients ALSO have an account here on Lyla. But even this 5% often found my ad FIRST on Bp. So you get it, without BP = no business for me, no business for other girls who work in Kingston too. Funny enough some people who have participated to this thread encourage this fear of girls while they do advertise on BP... So all the other girls are bad, but they are not? Hm... Instead of searching for what is wrong with the others' ads, or making up fears hoping that it will attract more business to them, I personally prefer to focus on HOW I ADVERTISE MYSELF. I have no time nor energy to loose on being BP's police to check which girl is real or fake. I am not to be taken responsible for fake ads on BP. I don't manage BP and cannot do anything about it. The fact is that it is the first place where men go to look for an escort. At least it is true FOR MY CITY, Kingston. And I do advertise or have profiles/accounts on many other websites, whether them being boards, or simply advertising sites for escorts. If some disrespectful men try to negociate donations, acts, or avoid my screening process, then end of discussion, no meeting, that's all. And I have never had any issue with my clients so far. Of course there are WOTS and no shows, but we ladies all experience that. My website link is always in my ads. My observation is that less than 5% of guys take the time/make the effort to visit it. So it is a lot of biases to put on ladies who use BP to advertise their services, when we know that we all have to do it! BP is what it is, I cannot change it. Can you? And one last thing, again about biases. I am going to quote what Leprechaun1957 wrote: ". I avoid certain locations or hotels (e.g Montreal Road or Rideau Street)" Why? Because the ladies you might meet/have met who are located in this area are not trustworthy? All of them? Are you absolutely sure about that? You might miss some wonderful experience by making this idea a general rule, and mostly, you might insult some who live/work in this area and who are known to be reputable ladies, welcoming gentlemen in very nice locations... And by writing this, you might put fear in some potential clients' minds who will conclude that they must not see girls who are located in this area. We have all said that: do your research. Well, people, please do your research, and avoid spreading fears and biases, it is insulting, and I am personally fed up with this. Thank you.

Debauchery... I like Debauchery... I would definitely give my full name for some Debauchery...:grin:

I will try to keep abreast of new developments in the future. Also, while I do agree that this discussion has indeed been more civilized than most internet forums, I don't think that is setting the bar particularly high :p

It's just my opinion, in a sea of many. I find that online discussions like this one quickly turn to heated debates, which most often devolve into two differing points of view stating the same facts over and over and insisting the other side doesn't appreciate their point of view, or know what they're talking about. I see where people are coming from, but once two opposing sides who are never going to change their opinions keep "debating', it usually ends poorly. I think some great thoughts have been put out there, but the major takeaways, "sp's value their safety above all else (and with good reason)" and "some guys are worried their personal info will be used against them (with somewhat less of a good reason)" were there after a few posts.

People (men and women alike) routinely give their personal information to all sorts of businesses on a regular basis...such as banks, cable companies, internet service providers, phone companies (I still get contacted by Bell after being finished with them eight years ago), etc etc etc. Do you know the background of each and every employee that works for them? Yet that information is given freely, and its even more information than a lady asks for. But when it comes to seeing a lady a man wants to see, and he is the one who contacted her, all of a sudden it's a big deal to provide your real name. No, I don't understand the hesitation. And when I embarked on this lifestyle, my career was in LE, and my bosses would have frowned on me seeing professional companions. Also, living in smalltown Ontario, if someone heard I was seeing companions, it wouldn't take long for most of the town to know I was seeing companions My employers never knew, and the town I live in doesn't know I see companions Ladies I've found, are far more discrete and honest than some businesses I've had to give information too. RG

Nicely put Berlin. Extortion is a losers game and I seriously doubt anyone in this industry would try it. I expect it's mostly in the movies and even then, it would be in cases where someone is specifically targeted because of who they are or what they do. I especially like the bit about getting caught. Let's be real...how many guys get caught because of something the lady did? Or was it because of their own stupidity leaving a text on their phone or not using a burner or some such thing?

To be honest, the thing that appall me the most in this discussion is that some users feel offended and take it personal when we throw our harsh reality in their face, instead of feeling empathetic to it. We are told we have an inflammatory discourse. Those who are empathetic and sensitive to our situation are being shamed into the guy who is just afraid to contradict ladies (or me LOL). Let's pretend that I am a cop, and that I speaking to a citizen of my reality to be killed on duty, in his/her city. It could be the neighbour! Do you think that the regular citizen would be like "Hey, I don't like to be accused of a cop killer! We are not all cop killers! Blocking their hears with both hand and going "lalalalaalalalala I can't hear ya"! "I believe we are living in a perfect world and I don't want to hear about your inflammatory discourse." My point is, why is us escort, when we try to speak our own reality, we are being silenced? Apparently it is very offensive when we do. Some clients just don't like to have their fantasies interrupted while they are riding their unicorn. Why are they even offended in the first place? I really don't understand. Really. Another exercise for the offended souls here: When it is late night, and you have to walk in the parking to your car...What is your biggest fear? Not remembering where you have put your car? Well for women, it is to be attacked at gun or knife point, being raped and robed. This happens EVERYDAY, in EVERY cities in EVERY countries. Although the previous example is a little off of the current subject, all I am trying to say is that if women feel like that in a parking (I don't know one woman who doesn't), imagine when she is in a situation with a first-time client? Of course most men are not like that! I have fantastic and amazing clients in my life. They are the reason why I love my work so much, and that I keep going. They have considerably contributed in my life, and I am thankful every day that they have decided to trust me. If one of them would ever become a victim of extortion by another "lady", she'd have to step over me first, and good luck with that. I tend to get protective with my clients and female colleagues. That's why I don't understand where the offence is...

Wrong thread derp

This is only link I have but I am sure you can donate to PACE via online or their site http://vancouver.24hrs.ca/2015/04/22/sex-worker-group-fights-to-stay-in-dtes I hope they can stay in DTES to continue to provide a valuable service for our colleagues.

A well respected member of this board. https://www.lyla.com/vbulletin/member.php?u=22822 And one amazing woman...who has happened to cross paths in her travels with this cub. Feeling very fortunate.

She has a reco thread at http://www.lyla.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?ltr=E&t=12051. She travels a lot, so she may well have other reco threads in other cities' sections if you feel inclined to search.

Stopped in today got a great deep tissue massage from Kathy, slender Asian lady, I was pleasantly surprised to be offered an extra, pleasant HE

Hockey... what hockey? Hockey season ended 2weeks ago. Or as former NFL coach Jim Mora says "PLAYOFFS!" Good luck to all the fans that still have teams playing! Signed, Bruins fan

i like the "no games" line in the ad...LOL

I am in full agreement with Mia Adore here. But I have to say that 98% of my business comes from bp. I found on here, that unless someone has tofft, no one wants to see you, well, there has to be someone that is first! I have seen a few gentlemen from here, none of which have had the courage to write a reco and many of them have been repeaters, that is their decision for various reasons, but it shouldn't be a reason to dismiss someone. Also, there are girls that request no reco's be written about them. I for one like to use bp, especially if I am touring, it is just another avenue of marketing for me. Yes, there are girls that do bait and switch and just outright lie about info and use fake/other girls pics. But to state that everyone that uses bp is not good, then tell that to the elite and very reputable ladies right here on Lyla that use it! especially when they are touring, it's how the gentlemen of the area know they are here! I get told from gentlemen that they don't want to come to me due to my location, but they live in an area that I wouldn't walk through in broad daylight without protection. I have a very clean, neat and welcoming incall location, extremely private and discreet that is just for this business. It never looks as though someone was just there, and I don't live in it. Until the fakers and liars are outed on bp, there will always be the misgivings that everyone is the same. I, like Mia Adore, have my website listed in my links, does anyone use the foresight to actually look at it? usually not! We advertise where we see fit, and since bp is worldwide, I uses it wherever I travel.

Quite simple isn't it.

LOL if you want a real name, get a girlfriend. Ladies choose to protect their name because we want to avoid stalkers, harassment and good-clients-gone-bad. I am sorry (not) that it ruins your fantasy. FANTASY being the keyword here. Some of us require the client's real name to avoid this exact same individuals mentioned above.

Had my staples removed yesterday morning. CLSC nurse said a portion of the incision margins didn't look just right so she used steri-strips to help until it got better. About six in the evening I felt way too much liquid in my lap. On inspection, found a small tear in my incision had opened and was acting as a drain. Not a doctor, but pretty sure this isn't good. On the advice of Info-Sante, went to the ER. Doc on call was impressed with the McGyver-esque arrangement I'd assembled to keep my insides in. Declared it to be okay enough to get me through the night and said to see my doc in the morning. Just got back from seeing him. All is okay. Keep the site dry. Pick up nothing heavier that 5 (five) pounds. Have a nice life. Which I will do. But I gotta say there was a moment in there that scared the bejeebers out of me!!

Cristy in no-lingerie. ;) To answer Bellafan's, both! MA or CR (Champaign Room)?

The Canadian Alliance for Sex Work Law Reform (national coalition of sex work organizations, sex work support organizations and allied groups) is collecting information on the impact of the new laws. Below are a series of questions and I'm hoping that people will be willing to answer them and forward the answers to me. I'll make them anonymous and send them off to the Alliance. This is so that when people are talking to the media or doing public talks, we'll have some recent anecdotal information about impacts sex workers are experiencing, if any. Please provide as much or as little information as you wish. Please feel free to forward the questions and my email address to anyone in your network as we'd like to hear from as many sex workers as possible and particularly independent workers as you often get missed! · What are some of the safety issues you face when doing sex work? · What is your relationship with police? · Have the police been hassling you and if so, do you know why? · Have the police been hassling your clients and if so, do you know why? · Do you go to the police if you need help? Why or why not? · Where do you work and is that the place you would like to work or would you prefer to work somewhere else? · Do you advertise and have there been changes in terms of how you advertise? · Do you work with others, have there been changes in terms of how you work with others? · What can you do with third parties in your place of work? · Have you changed your safety mechanisms since the news laws have come into effect? If so, how? please send me your answers and i will forward them to the alliance!! [email protected] love susie

Not according to the articles I read. They may present in different ways but fundamentally, the diagnosis is the same. That is an ad hominem attack. I've not said anything supporting violence or implying that I don't want to hear about it. I'm not deflecting, merely sharing an interesting thought I had. These are how discussions work. Conversations flow, people think of new things. I was merely wondering if, like CEOs, surgeons and salesmen, there might be some aspects of psychopathy that are particularly suitable for sex work. Again, don't read anything more than what was said. The question was about representation and whether there might be either more or fewer psychopaths amongst SWs than in the general population. See this is where I disagree but it might be we have different definitions of what psychopath means. Wikipedia talks about many traits including boldness, dis-inhibition, lack of empathy and remorse, etc. To me, those might be traits that could actually be useful to someone in the sex work field. And yet once again, don't take it as anything more that a topic for discussion. Not suggesting you or anyone else in this field is a psycho or even more likely to be one. Only pondering the question of whether it might be USEFUL to be one. Almost all the ladies I've met have struck me as warm, personable and empathetic individuals. But might not a psychopath be particularly good at faking that?

That is definitely something I can believe. Unfortunately a lot of psychos are VERY good at appearing normal until it's too late. There's a very interesting book called The Wisdom of Psychopaths that talks a lot about the psychopaths living among us. It actually makes the argument that there are some traits that are actually very useful, particularly in our modern world. It makes sense really since purely negative traits tend to evolve out of a population.

éassult Speaking about scientific, We should acknowledge that there are vast differences in being a psychopath ( meaning psychologically delusional ), and sociopaths ( do not know or understand how society works and how to get along in it ) and the violent criminal ( such as a common rapist or violent assaults. ) So yes the violent criminal is much more predominate in our world and industry than the others mentioned. Specifically the kind that can not handle rejection. And to be rejected by a lady like us hit them extra hard, which is when they tend to try to find our locations for revenge purposes. At least with screening we can limit who can reach us or not. I have had a few to try, actually not too long ago. If I did not screen him in this method, lord knows what could have happened. It doesn't just happen in the movies.

I think the main reason a lady wants the potential clients name and info is for her safety! I would understand if the lady is some random new SP with no good reco's etc, but if it is a highly reco'd and respected SP there really should be no issue because she would never do anything with that information(of course unless the client did something horrible to her etc) I guess with these new laws people may be more paranoid and all that, but there are a lot of great ladies with great reco's that do not ask for all this(unless of course as mentioned above they need it to go to an outcall and need the name for the hotel verification!) To add to what I said above, I do not ask for full names just because I understand the whole dicretion thing etc, I am thankful I have never had anything really bad happen during my time off and on in the business but usually just from talking to someone and getting to know them a bit and by the way they talk to me, I can tell if I want to see them or not. I have had to turn away a few people in the past but it had to do more with terrible terrible hygiene(even after a shower) but nothing to make me want to report them lol

There are many good girls there and though many may not deserve gentlemen they get them. They get them because they are the types that don't ask questions, they don't screen and a lot of men like that. A lot of men fall for the fake fantasy and many don't care if the fantasy is fake they simply want someone anonymous. Men keep paying them that's why they remain and repost-simple

Starting in the front and ending up in the back :) Pub or fine dining?

Ive definitely got a thing for Jonah Hill... and matrix era Keanu Reeves

I've never been asked for my "real" name, perhaps it's because I've been around awhile and have a presence on boards and twitter. That being said I wouldn't provide it if requested to do so. It certainly is a woman's prerogative to request such information as it is mine not to provide it. If it became an issue, no harm no foul.....I'd just move along. Peace MG

Welcome Sasha... hopefully you will find this community a welcoming informative place to learn and share like I have. Sent from my Passport using Tapatalk

How else are the hairs on your neck supposed to stand up or feel the chills go up your spine? Kissing is my favourite :)

For me, kissing is seductive, it always turns me on... Especially if you remember that I love kisses on the neck as well ;) Kissing is something natural when connection is shared. I also think it makes the date more fulfilling and fun. Who will say the opposite ? Who doesn't like to feel the heat raise, one's body getting warmer and the atmosphere becoming more sensual... ? You know when you think: omg, he/she is into it, this is going to be really nice and fun !! This being said, each his own and I understand and respect people that find it too intimate or engaging. For those who like kissing, a magical date might be what will come next... ;)

* Flying to middle of nowhere Canada and not getting your luggage, only to find nothing open to buy replacement items. *Calling Rogers and waiting 90mins on hold, when they answer you explain your calling as the cell keeps dropping calls in downtown Toronto as they are in the middle of telling you that you are using the phone wrong, the call drops. *Waiting 6 weeks for a replacement Iphone only for it not to work *Travelling to a city that is expensive and having your entire trip no-show(on more than one occasion)