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Showing content with the highest reputation on 09/10/16 in Posts
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2 pointsIm available all weekend! Gentlemen, Allow me to introduce myself. Im Rebecca, the cute girl next door you have dream about, once in your life. Im 26 years old, french Canadian from Montréal with an adorable accent. I stand 5'4 with curvy build, long dark hair and nice handful of perky tits. My juicy pink lipz will amaze you in more than one way. My warm and friendly personality will put you at ease just with a smile by opening the door. Kiss? Cuddle? Light caress? Or something a little more spicy? I love it all. Take a look at what others have to say about me.. http://www.lyla.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=40938 At my place donation... Limited time specials for lyla's members only! 100HH 180H 280 90MIN 340 2H Located in the SOUTHEND by the airport... 613-315-6354
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2 pointsRest assured, my feathers remain unruffled. Lyla is cyclical and such opinion holders come and go. Recommendations are key in establishing a worthy reputation; without, only a few undesirables will give merit to such unseemly threads. Providers know exactly who writes about them, our ability to match reviews to faces is unparalleled. Unless it's a truly extraordinary experience physically and financially, rest assured it certainly won't take long until your identity is matched to your handle... smiles, cat
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1 pointHey ladies what is a major turn off when someone is looking to book a time with you ? One thing I absolutely hate is when someone texts me and says....What's up? Like really lol that will not grab my attention First impressions mean everything and I prefer a gentlemen being respectful and courteous when inquiring about my ......... For an example; Hello how are you or Hi I am .... and I am interested in knowing more about you and your ........!......so much better
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1 pointOnce in a while you come to realize that so many of our members really don't "get" the whole hobby experience, or rather, they understand that there are rules but believe they are somehow exempt. So let's help them. Let's give some handy tips to make this a more wonderful experience for all. This is a pleasant place so let's keep it constructive... and be aware that the rules shouldn't just be for clients, you can also add some helpful tips that may help a new provider too! Here goes: 1. Appointment time is at 2:00 pm, what time do I arrive? Ummmmm. Hmmmmm. What part of 2:00 pm is ambiguous? A 2 o'clock appointment means you are at her door at 2. Not 1:55, not 2:10. It's seems petty but when you screw up her schedule, you may be screwing up MY schedule. I may be the appointment at 3. I have things to do... and my schedule may not be as loosey goosey as yours. I may be using a very small window of time or I may have "commitments" that see me arriving like clockwork elsewhere. Regardless, when the little hand is at 2 and the big hand is at 12, be where you are supposed to be. 2. "I am awesomely wicked good in bed, and I often masturbate to pictures of myself nude, because I am that good looking. Can we negotiate a better rate?" In a word, No. Would you go to a restaurant and say, "I am a really good eater, can I get a better price on that steak?" Would you go to a lawyer and say, "I am an awesome criminal, can you represent me for free?" Would you go to the dentist and say, "My teeth are so bad that you should fix them all for $50!" A service provider gets paid at a set rate because she is a professional. She is good... no, not just good... wickedly awesome good, at what she does. Your part is the compensation, her part is the wicked awesome part. Pay the pretty lady and be happy. 3. Cleanliness is next to godliness. Ever step into an elevator and stand next to someone who smells like they have never met a bar of soap they liked? Ever met someone that looked like they were an extra in the Walking Dead? Have you ever gone into a bathroom after someone and wondered if they ate something dead? Step one. Go to the potty. Do your business. Wipe. Wipe again. Wipe again. and then, wipe again. Do the optical test. Last wipe. Is there any residue? If yes, start over. If no, then proceed to step two. Step Two. Shower. Clean EVERYWHERE. Rinse. Repeat. Did you pay attention to anywhere in particular??? Hmmm??? Go back to those places. Make em sparkle. (at this point I do suggest that artificial glitter is NOT necessary.) Get out of the shower. Towel dry (for pete's sake use a clean towel!)... apply a generous amount of deodorant/anti-perspirant. Brush your teeth. (if additional grooming is required, please do that too.) Step three. Clothing. Go to the place where you keep your clean clothes. No. Not the place where you put the stuff that you THINK you can wear again. The CLEAN clothes. You know that stuff that you just took from the dryer and folded nicely?? That's the stuff. Wear that shit. Uh oh... what if I have to do step one again?? Then repeat ALL the steps. Cuz skidmarks are not sexy. Febreeze showers are not acceptable. 4. I have to cancel, what do I do? Give your head a smack. With a hammer. Stop. Now take a pointy thing and stick it with great force into your upper thigh, avoiding the artery. Now, go to your car. Start it. Open the door, put your foot beneath a tire and have someone put that car in reverse. Cancellations? NOT COOL. We all know that shit happens. A death in the family. A sick kid. Decapitation with farm machinery. Thermonuclear war. Explosion of your planet from a death star ray. That shit is acceptable.... but you still owe the pretty lady an explanation AND a cancellation fee. When you cancel, providers don't eat. When providers don't eat they get distended bellies and look like kids from the CARE commercials. When you cancel, providers give not only you, but also your city, a bad reputation. This makes you masturbate more. Because you will never get laid again. Ever. You will over develop muscles in only one arm. Your clothes will fit poorly. People will figure it out and suspect you are the notorious masturbating king of cancellations. They will hunt you down and kill your family. Let's keep little Bobby and Joanie safe. If you make an appointment, keep that appointment. Your family will love you for it. 5. "I'm a little short on cash. Do you think she will notice if the envelope is a bit short?" In a word, yes. She will also point out that your penis is a bit short.... and that your skill level is a bit short... and that you cry like a bitch when you have your pathetic little man-gasm. Do you want that??? Do YOU WANT THAT, bitch??? Wow. That was a bit over-emphatic. Gonna step away from the computer and take a valium. BACK!!!! Where were we... yes. Shorting your provider. Not COOL. Remember, providers have special powers. They communicate telepathically. As soon as you walk out that door, she will know and so will all of her allies in the super friends. They will combine their superpowers and make sure that you never get wood again.... and if you do, it will be at inappropriate times... like at funerals or family gatherings or when talking to your grandfather or something like that. Seriously?? Give your head a shake. If you are short then GET the money and make sure you have it set aside BEFORE you book. You will have a wickedly awesome good time... just pay the pretty lady what you agreed to and enjoy! 6. Can I pay her in drugs? Hmmmm. Does your banker take drugs in lieu of money? Have you offered Rogers drugs in return for their cable/home phone/cell phone/internet bundle? When you get groceries at Loblaws, do they have a special drawer that says "financial equivalent in drugs?" You know the answer. "No, you addled-pated simpleton." Remember the distended belly part from above? Providers take cash because cash buys groceries, pays bills and looks pretty. Carrying cash will not get you arrested. Using cash is the engine that runs our capitalist society. "All you need is cash, cash is all you need." The Beatles sang that, I think. Your turn....
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1 pointAfter hearing so many great things, I decided to venture down to The Brass Club to see for myself what all it has to offer. Jessica was a great help sending me on the right track to exactly what I was looking for. Being it my first visit, there was of course the first visit gitters. Thankfully, Madison made me feel comfortable instantly. Her smile, beautiful eyes and general charm are quite contagious, getting lost inside her gaze will give you goosebumps. Madison is through and through a true girl next door, unmatched beauty, down to earth, a real head on her shoulders. Chemistry is something very important to me during a visit and there was no lack at all. Time spent with this amazing beauty will drive you to visit more and more. After a massage with Madison, you will be on another world. A true sensual touch with just the right amount of pressure for those problem areas. She may be new to this but you would never know. Thank you for a spectacular time Madison
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1 pointWelcome to Paradise, Let my hands and soft skin relax you as you forget about all life's troubles. Enjoy being treated like royalty at Paradise Spa with Katie Cummings, "A true classic beauty." Follow link for more about me... (right cick and go to...) https://www.lyla.com/classifieds/showproduct.php/product/1518/title/katie-cummings-xo/cat/57
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1 pointHi there, thank you for checking my ad. You will not be disappointed with my A+++ massage... My name is Vivian. I'm 28 years old. Gorgeous, i am a classy looking Lady with long black hair, seductive cat eyes ...., beautiful silky soft, tanned skin. work out body with all the right curves in the right places. You have finally met your dream girl... I great you at the door with a lovely smile then lead you to the massage room...I will start with a deep soothing tissue massage to relax all your muscles then follow with a soft touch to invigorate your whole body then the fun time ... It will be the most relaxing, creative and passionate session for you ever. So amazing that you cannot help yourself from thinking about it and want to come back for more ! http://www.lyla.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=92146 For relaxing massage $40/30m $50/45m $70/60m appointment only, call/text me at 6l3 7l2 l2OO mon to sat 10am to 7pm
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1 pointI saw Shu this afternoon for the first time. The massage was one of the best I have ever had. Not rushed at all.
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1 point....and still is... they are gone.. and yet... here we are.. still hashing over him... *sigh* next topic please ;)
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1 point- forests so dense you can't smell anything but the folliage - lakes so still as to be mistaken for glass - catching fish to feed my friends - camp fires - laying in damp grass, smelling the earth in the dark of night, watching stars, seeing a few fall.... - finding amazing mushrooms and plants - enjoying conversations with strangers who become fast friends - being gifted with something sooo incredibly special, I won;t even mention it here!! - being graced the appearance of not 1, not 2.. but SIX eagles on my adventure away - learning more about myself, and those I call friends - arriving home to find I have been sorely missed by my kitten (has NOT left my side since my arrival home) ... I was ridiculously happy to be away.. and am just as ridiculous now that I am back <grin> ...and very happy to embark on my next <short> adventure away ;)
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1 pointVerrrrrry well played 'Opentonew' hahaha well done (bit of a creepy picture hehe an undulating uvula but hahaha ;)
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1 point....yep....*sigh*.. there is always 'one of those' in a crowd though.... I went to block him, (and have)... and noticed he has apparently been suspended.. which, I assume, made his day, seeing as that sort of appeared to be the goal... odd little man that..... <shaking head...> "We now rrrreturn you to your regularly scheduled prrrrrogramming" ;)
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1 pointI would definitely recommend avoiding her... I saw her some time ago and hadn't gotten around to posting anything. She's skinnier that the pics she's posted and her boobs are much smaller. When texting to set up an appointment, her price of $200/ hr seemed reasonable as she said it was all inclusive. When I got to her apartment everything was extra... ��, touching her, etc... she didn't even want to take off her shirt and bra. She obviously didn't want to be there and was not very interactive. When I was leaving(completely unsatisfied) I noticed men's shoes in the closet by the door... I'd would not repeat meeting her and recommend that other guys avoid seeing her
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1 pointHi Everyone! My name is Sadie (fka Skylar Heart)! I'm a petite beauty with booty here to take all your tension & stiffness away. I strive to provide the best experience possible for those who enjoy the finer things in life. I have experience as an exotic dancer and some of you may recognize me from a few of your favourite stripclubs in the Ottawa/Gatineau area!? I'm open-minded, sweet & fun and I love being in the massage industry! I am looking forward to getting you alone & relaxed very soon! I'm Available: ***ON SUNDAY*** Currently from 4pm until 10pm! ************ I'm Also Available Next On: Monday from 4pm until 10pm! & Tuesday from 4pm until 10pm too!! ******************** Please call Vibe at 613 680 8059 to reserve your precious time with me! ********** You can visit my Cerb Profile & see more pictures: HERE! & Check Out My New Recommendations: HERE! & My DUO Recommendation: HERE! xoxo Sadie
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1 pointI have seen her. A bit plump. Super friendly, very much a girlfriend experience. Nice location (clean, tidy, etc). Easy to talk to. I've yet to find a SP who didn't own a bunch of cats, but hers were clean, no litter smell and well behaved. I can share more via PM if needed, but I'd recommend try her yourself.
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1 pointTo our White Knights who have delightfully replied...I salute you. To the OP, it should be apparent that the ladies of Lyla have no desire to engage with you on any level here. Such thread topics are so obviously in bad taste, it's hard to believe you don't see it. My gentle suggestion would be for you to give deep consideration to how genuinely insightful your thread topics and posts are to providers... smiles, cat
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1 pointThanks for taking an interest in my ad. For Immediate Response Text: 613-884-3102 I offer Companionship with Massage as well as "Manscaping." With 2 Locations to suit everyone's taste. The "Boudoir" is located in "Little Italy" perfect for tender moments. "Dungeon613" is located in Centertown I stand 5'7 with long lush brown hair. All natural DD38 breasts & a spankable derriere. My relaxed style will put you at ease. I'm a good listener and easy to talk with, I have an open mind & I'm sincere . I enjoy sharing a mutually satisfying experience that's are never rushed. It's all about having a good time Availability Sept 8th to 11th Thursday to Saturday:10am-11pm Sunday: 8pm-11pm ***VISA*MASTER*AMEX*** ********************** Contact Info PM Ms. Samantha or Text/Call 613-884-3102 E-mail [email protected] ***************************** Manscaping: Trimming/shaving of a man's body hair so as to enhance our appearance . Available for private areas & torso Massage: Warm oil full body relaxation massage. Domination: Sensory play, Role play, Fem Dom Fetishes: Leather, Latex, Panty Hose, Foot *********************************** My Recommendations http://www.lyla.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?ltr=S&t=68076 30mins/$150 1h/$200 90mins/$250 2h/$300 Couples 2hrs/$450 I can visit for an added $50 Downtown w/Free Parking Kisses & Spanks Ms.Samantha xox
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1 pointhttp://winnipeg.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/lean-hottest-intown/2988282
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1 pointThis is rare and doesn't include most men out there but don't harass an SP non stop all day long asking if she's available. When she doesn't return someone's messages, there is an obvious reason as to why the person doesn't hear back. That's a major red flag right there and there is no way I would invite someone like that into my location who has no awareness of social boundaries. If an SP doesn't return a person's messages, it's best to move on and find someone else. Harassing her even if the person's intentions aren't nefarious will scare her away even more. When a potential client's attitude screams that of desperation and being too overly eager, I go in the opposite direction.
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1 pointI may be in the minority here but I don't offer a shower for two. I think the biggest part is I take time to do my hair and makeup and have had a few fiascos where I had to basically take off all my makeup and redo my hair due to those pesky and at time uncontrollable shower heads. However, I do offer a bath tub experience for two on my hour massage appointments in a big roman bath that I have. It's great on a cold winter's day and really nice to relax in. Ultimately I don't get wet above my chest. lol.
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1 pointTake shoes off when entering an SP's location. I tell new clients to remind them just in case. Imo, this is a first sign of respect. Discretion and privacy for SPs - Have some boundaries and don't cross them like showing up at a lady's location unannounced or other shady practices such as being indiscreet when seeing them in public, spying on them , etc. Reputable ladies will respect your privacy so please respect ours. Follow protocol when visiting and being discreet upon entering the location or when buzzing up. These things aren't the norm when it comes to more service oriented type details on how to be a good client but they all make a lasting impression and can be a deal breaker in choosing not to see someone again. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries are a huge thing with me. If someone doesn't respect them, I'm done.
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1 pointI will be visiting Angels Touch Friday night, interested in seeing Valentina or Chanel. Anyone seen them lately? Any info about Angels Touch would be great as well
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1 pointWash your hands after using the bathroom...maybe I should be a bit crass...when u piss, flush not only the toilet but your digits too!
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1 point8. Safety first If you are a guy you KNOW that wearing a condom is akin to drinking beer with a straw. It's not as good as without but in the end, it's not that bad. Wearing a condom let's you go home to your significant other and not wear one. It's as simple as that. It also lets your wickedly awesome provider also go home to HER significant other (if applicable) and not have to demand that they wear one. It creates that safe barrier between both of you and the great unknown. The likelihood is that you are both very clean and very safe... but why take the risk??? If I can only make one super serious point in this entire thread, it's this. STDs are ugly. HIV is heinous. AIDS is deadly. Nuff said on dat. 9. Fragrance I know it's aesthetics, but we all like to smell good. Many of us have a particular scent that just works with our body chemistry. Not every commercially available scent is good. Ice Blue Aqua Velva is a manly scent that many of your grandfathers wore to cover the fact that their homes had no running water and that they could only bathe monthly. Aqua Velva, Brut and Hai Karate should not be worn by any man with a birth date after 1919. Bay Rum is used by pirates to kill scurvy and to keep other lonely, lusty pirates away. Anything that you purchased prior to the millennium should probably be used as drain cleaner. Febreeze is not an acceptable cologne. Scent should be used in a delicate fashion. You should be able to smell it only at very close range. Ohhhh... and your twig and berries do not require the assistance of any eau de cologne. No. They. Don't. Spray cologne on your arm. Now lick your arm. Lick it again. And again. And again. And again. Now give that arm a suck... oh yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about.... lick that arm until it gives you the goods... STOP. What does your mouth taste like? That's why you don't spray stuff on your tackle and bait. Ohhhhh... and here's a tip for both ladies and gents: If you are somebody that has sensitivities to fragrance PLEASE let it be known at time of booking. We all want to have a sexy time. Runny eyes, snotty noses and swollen tongues ... not so sexy. 10. First contact. Ohhhh the jitters. You have seen her. She is beautiful. She has two of those, and one of those and a great one of those... she has a beautiful mind, she expresses herself so well.... she's funny!!! She's profound. She's smart. She's perfect!!!!!!! I gotta write her. I have to PM her and ask if we can get together. I went to her website and checked the rates and the menu (like all SMART hobby guys do ;) ) ... and now I am ready to write her. I know what I want... I have the money put aside (thanks for reminding me of that Old Dog!!)... I am .... FUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKK.... what do I write??? Dear Alotta Fagina ... I have a 10 inch meat girder pulsing with lusty intent <THWACK> ... you're right maybe I was exaggerating, thanks for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 7 inch purple python of love poised and waiting for your girl cave <THWACK> ... okay... maybe that sounded a little stalker like, but I do get kudos for being more accurate. Thanks again for the head smack. Dear Alotta Fagina... I have a 5.5 inch throbbing man stick just waiting for you to... <THWACK> ... okay... WTF??? Why do you keep hitting me???? Try "Hi Alotta, I saw your website and would be very interested in meeting you next Tuesday afternoon. Please let me know if that works with your schedule! Thanks, Happy Hobbyist." Simplicity works. You aren't writing a Penthouse letter... you are booking with a professional provider. She knows you are interested. She will see your penis. (There I said the penis word. Whooops said it again.) No need to go into goofy graphic detail... plus when you write that stuff, you get that creepy smile and that's frickin' scary ... stop it now. 11. Bacon Sandwiches. Providers - you know it. Bacon sandwiches save lives. It's not necessarily a deal breaker but I think it definitely would be a pot sweetener if you had bacon sandwiches as a mandatory refreshment at your incall. I like mine toasted with lettuce, tomato, mayo and a little salt and pepper. Cut into triangles, but you don't have to cut off the crusts. MegForFun cuts off the crusts for me but that is because she loves me. Bacon sandwiches will improve your business and will put you that much further ahead than providers who only provide ham sandwiches or cheese sandwiches and much further ahead than providers who don't make any sandwiches. Bacon sandwiches just make good business sense. wait there's more.... later ;)
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