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I'm very curious too, as I am part of that "choice words and blocked" umbrella. Unprofessional approaches and lack of respect for someones protocol, doesn't vibe well with most people. This feels like something a "SB/SD" arrangement would start like. First hand actually, yes... this is how most would start. But what people don't understand is that protocol for online SW, Sugaring SW and FSSW are all VERY DIFFERENT. If you get used to the protocol for SBs or online SW, you're going to have to go through alot more hoops and follow a way more strict protocol to see someone who gets paid for their TIME (including random outcall meets). Emotional vampires are the biggest issue when a John goes from OF to booking someone... "$4.33/minute." This means if you email talking about random bs, we're probably not going to respond if you don't attach a payment for our time taken to read and respond. It's really that simple. Manda hit the nail on the head, no sane SW is going to go out in a public place and meet "you" in person, to decide if they should meet you in person. That's fucking weird man. Best of luck. * what also bothers me is that if someone asks for compensation for their time, that they don't willingly offer for free - they get labeled as "not passionate about it." WELL NO! IM PASSIONATE ABOUT MAKING MONEY... not seeing you for free and making a connection to see if we vibe. It's my job to make sure we vibe and if you don't like how the first session went, don't come back. But you're not going to waste MY time to figure that out. I'm still going to be paid. This is not Amazon, no refunds or exchanges. No 30 day trial. You get what you get and you take the chance... I dont ask John's to meet in public first to see if we vibe, I take the risk because that's all part of the game. Okay, I'm done. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. Have a good day.

Darling, there are literally thousands of my pictures and videos on my maintained, and easily verifiable socials and fansites.. I've left the sexiest trail of breadcrumbs for anyone who cares to do their own research and follow it 😈 If that & 100+ reviews on multiple sites over nearly a decade aren't enough to verify that I'm legitimate, I don't think that my sending a non sexual selfie is going to convince anyone 😂 But for what it's worth, in case a newer sp is reading this.. I would also not meet a stranger in public without a deposit.. Too many scams of people having us show up to random places for a date that isn't real.. It's a big reason why many of us require deposits for outcalls 🤷 I've shown up for lunch dates who no show, only to message me details of how nice I looked, or they liked my outfit, afterwards.. Then they've already seen who I am, and could easily follow me,without me knowing who they are. I do prefer not to be stalked or followed lol For this reason especially, I require a deposit for public meetings with a new guest, just to ensure my own safety and privacy is respected I honestly don't know any providers who are meeting strangers in public first..

There is the truth right there. If you can't afford an hour of an SPs, Mistress or Subs time to learn about them and see if you vibe then you shouldn't be asking.

Your expectations are completely out of line. I am probably the worst new client ever for approaching things the right way, and not following proper protocol...I'm lucky that the lovely ladies I have met were patient and gracious, but they didn't have to be. I would love to spend time with them anywhere, anytime, and they likely know that, haha...but I would never ask anything like what you suggest. Their jobs are hard enough already. Don't make them harder, and respect them and their time.

This thread is hilarious, I've learned a ton and am going to change the way I approach making bookings. I'm gonna start requiring SPs to send me a photo of them with their keyboard on their head to verify their pics. If they can accomplish this task then they may have the privilege of meeting me for coffee so I can determine if they're truly worthy of me. I'm an old fashioned guy though so I'll gladly pay for their coffee (none of that frappuccino shit though, I don't come across money easily). I expect this rigorous screening process will weed out approximately 100% of all SPs on planet earth and I'll finally have the time and energy to get back to my true passion: whittling.

Oh it shows. 🤷‍♀️ Gotta run! Having lunch with another provider. I'm gunna ask my waitress if I can sample the food first, before I decide to pay for it. Wish me luck!

I have to question how many times this has actually worked for you? I've been at this a long time and I think most of the ladies I have met over the years would immediately block/ignore you for even asking. (Especially for a one hour appointment). The rest of them would likely have some choice words for you ;) . Maybe I'm wrong but I have a hard time believing that you ask this regularly with any degree of success, at least without offering some compensation for their time.

Polite gentlemen are my absolute favorite! And, while I respect others and myself -and require the same (hence my avid love of gentlemen), I dont think so highly of myself that I believe Im a rare breed in that way around here!! Most of the lyla ladies directly speak of respect in their ads 💯 Fair warning: I can smell a fake though so you have to be genuinely polite and respectful, not using niceties to mask arrogance. For any new SWs here, if you want to but dont know how to yet, read Clays posts closely and you will find examples of this so you too can learn to spot the fake gentlemen. They dont come around here often, or last long here! Thank you to Clay for the educational examples provided here, such a prince... Last words from me on this are directly for all the impeccable gentlemen of Lyla; I adore you ALL and what better time to extend my heartfelt thanks to each of you for making being part of this industry worth the toll it sometimes takes. Every industry has its downside, and you all are definitely top the list of upsides! Cheers 🥂 S.

Then pay for their time that they meet you. But you'll rarely get a yes. You're allowed to have your view and allowed to be old fashion... but knowledge is power and if you open your mind up to other peoples thoughts, feelings, emotions and SAFETY... you might get somewhere instead of bitching on the internet. Like someone else said... YOU are the common factor here. Fix yourself. Fix the issue.

THIS! WE ARE A LUXURY, NOT A RIGHT. If you can't afford to keep your phone on, then you can't afford a SW. That simple. If someone tells me they don't have an active number, how will they text when they arrive? Not an excuse. You are not a Prince and we are not "hired by you" we accept you as a client and you PAY our SERVICE FEE. You are not owners of our time. Simple as that. Have good day!

I came here to leave my 2 cents but I see I don’t have to because @SarahAlexxx @StephanieMystique and @MsManda have all said everything crossing my mind!

I understand the desire, and the rationale from your side. The reality for these ladies is it is not practical, nor is it safe. As @MsManda pointed out, it would be very easy to arrange a meet and then follow them when they leave. as @SarahAlexxx said, it's her job to make sure you feel well looked after. Read her reviews...they'll tell you if she's good at her job. (They all agree, btw,,,she is)

Why would you wish for more women to be in such a vulnerable position that they have to walk the blade? How vile and disturbing tbh.

Sarah and MS Manda - you are so right on the money!!!!

Oh I won't... and it definitely won't be on account of some self proclaimed Prince. 😆

This may totally work for you and I'm glad it does. But there will be NO negotiations on my rates. Meet me for dinner for 10 minutes when I only allow one hour minimums, means you will still be required to pay me for the HOUR I set aside for you... even if you leave after 10 minutes.

Then don't eat it. But don't expect those who do eat it, to let you try a bite of theirs. XD

To SarahAlexxx point taken . Education is important and yes that is what LYLA is about . Now I'm done lol

You eat pasta and pussy?

I play fair. Doesn't always mean nice. 😉 There's a difference between bullying and educating. Sometimes children throw tempertantrums to get what they want. It's up to the parent to explain why ABC isn't happening. Exactly what's going on here. We (as a SW community) are trying to EDUCATE someone on how things are done, as well as protect other, and future SW in the industry. This thread and kind of discussion are extremely important for new people. However, if they don't want to listen to the class, they WILL get detention. 😉 I know how to use a meter stick.

Not that in any way I'm against free speech but this thread is about to go sideways very soon in my opinion . Sometimes we must agree to disagree and move on . Prince Clay will continue to justify his actions and those on the other side will put theirs forward , I don't see any common ground here . That's my final say . Let's remember to all play nice .

Then you will never truly be an ally. It's that simple. Byeeeeeeee

Using SWs as a therapist or ANY kind of emotional outlet is extremely selfish. We aren't trained professionals - seek help. Also, your emotional and financial safety is NOTHING compared to finding one of us dead in a hotel room, or as Manda said, stalked and beaten. I'm sorry, but I do not give you sympathy. You need to seek your own aid that isn't putting someone else at risk.

If this is "always" being told to you, and "many" try to diagnose you...YOU are the common factor here. I don't know about the gaslighting, but I do know denial isn't just a river in Egypt. To everyone else...I'm sorry, yes, I know that was lame. I have my brilliant moments, today isn't one of them.

If safety is important to you, I think you have to realize that safety is an incredibly important factor for these ladies. Also, if your emotional safety is that much of a concern, it might be better to consider a different hobby until that is under control. I don't say that in a rude or condescending way...you can't convey tone over text. Emotional regulation isn't easy, so if you have any issues in that area, you have my sympathy.

Make sure to contact a provider that requires phone conversations to verify otherwise it's rude to expect one from someone that doesn't offer them. Imo and experience, those that want phone calls are time waster and beating it on the other end. Top it off, it's never a discrete conversation, nor can you insure someone isn't recording the conversation.

I will not be spending any extra time, money or effort above what I have put into my marketing (website, social medias, Lyla, online content, creating profiles, advertising, professional photos, ect) to meet some entitled person who thinks they are above my safety, security and thinks less of me because they don't value my time to compensate for meeting. As @MsManda put it, we leave sexy breadcrumb trails for you to follow and get all the information you need to make a decision to see us. For an SP that is new, don't send them photos. I have seen enough pic collector collections to know you are risking your safety. It takes them showing the wrong person or blasting it out to hurt you, be it psychical, mental or emotionally, or lose your job(s), family and housing. Build your content, build you ads, build your website if you choose too. If you need help, there is a ton of helpful information on this board to get you up and running. AMEN!!!!

I agree with Ms Manda on this one. It's not fair nor realistic to expect an SP to meet you for free . Their time should be respected and compensated for . In my experience most providers allow a little chit chat to make sure the comfort level is there . I've left when I have not felt comfortable but I leave something for their time. Most have understood graciously some not so . Maybe this may not be considered proper but I feel it's fair .

It says a lot, not that it needed to be said, that people are still posting even after shes gone 🥲 Lydia sure left a mark, and its not the same here without her 💔

It's nothing personal. I just have to meet someone in person before I can hire them. The way they speak, their scent, their body-language. It's just nice to know what I'm paying for, for that fleeting hour.

When writing a pm, email or texting, please do not send one liners! Many times, it come across as being rude. Ive been on the recieving end of this threw txting, hence the reason why I do not text anymore to make a 1st appointment! WE can not hear your tone of voice, so when you send something like this: "WHEN CAN I SEE YOU?" It just sounds rude. First off, INTRODUCE yourself! Say hello, how are you, I am Mr.XXX. The reason why you are emailing or pm'ing: I am interested in meeting with you on this date and time for this long. A little about yourself, if your comfortable saying anything, some ladies actually request that you do, some don't. Then sign off... Looking forward to hearing from you, Until we meet, or what ever. When you write an actual pm or email, we WILL respond! When I see something that is not like the above described, I dont even want to put in the effort to respond, since you did not take the effort to say more than 3 or 4 words to me! And I am sure I am not the only lady that feels like that! And most importantly!! Read her Ads, website and profile!! They are very imformative. Hence the reason why we put so much effort into them! The effort your going to put in by pm'ing "Whats your rates?", "What time do you start?", or the big question, "What do you look like?" will be alot less than clicking your mouse on the link to her website/profile! You just look very lazy and disrespectful! We are not asking you to write an autobiography about yourself or a novel! 5-6 lines is not asking for much! I know some men are men of very few words, but if you cant take a few minutes to learn about us and say more then a few words, then imagin how we think the encounter will go with you?! Starting an email/pm politely can and will get you a better or if any encounter with your choosen SP/MA! ****************** I've searched and could not find a thread about etiquette on pm'ing, but found this thread, which only shows you how to START a pm: http://cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=15861 If I missed it someone let me know and Ill ask the Mod to add this post to it! Thanks, Tiffany Amber xoxo

Then carry on. Because the sexy trail you left behind here, isn't going to get you far on this site. Try SeekingArrangements. You might have more luck. But youde have to dish out the membership fee. 😆

This sounds like what youd expect from traditional dating. The fact is that it IS unusual in the SW industry. Thats why providers give details about their look and service prior to bookings. Hesitant clients can ask to negotiate a fee beforehand that if you meet and dont want to go through the whole encounter, the client gives the lady some cash - not the whole amount but enough to compensate. Thats how we navigate the fine line between risk 4 the gent and risk 4 the lady when it comes to in person "chemistry tests"

I'm not a fan of pasta.🤷‍♂️

Invest your time in researching them to make sure they are the right fit and invest your money in the time that they are putting forth for you. If you don't want to do it that way, maybe being on a 'professionals get paid for their time' site isn't the place for you to be. Great point. If emotional safety is an issue, maybe seek counseling/therapy instead as a better investment of money and time.

lol well if you're not willing to send a non-sexual pic of yourself proving that you're real, then you'll likely never get hired by me bc I require a meeting in person in a public space before any money is exchanged. Works every time. Anyway it'd be nice to book a lady in Truro, as I grew up there and the nostalgia might really add to the experience. It's a cozy town.

So finally decided to meet her and did last week. The girl is real and genuine. So can book with confidence. Experience is subjective so not commenting here.

After a re-read of this thread I was reminded of an upcoming date (yes it'll be post op but one I'm very much looking forward too) that I'm having so a deposit (2nd one) has been sent to the lady. And I've paid deposits (well in full) since 2011 (unless a lady doesn't take deposits) and never lost a deposit. So I'm going to continue paying companions by etransfer, including for this date. A Rambling From Someone Who Doesn't Hate This Industry RG

I will b booking with her this trip...can't wait based on her reco's....

My pleasure! Personally, I dont bother with LeoList, never have, never will. Its a total crap chute on both sides so I personally see no point in attracting unsavory characters while being amongs a bunch of scammers when the good hobbyists will end up checking me out somewhere like Lyla or an Indy Companion collective in the end anyway. If I were a hobbyist, I wouldn't go anywhere near there. Why go sifting for gold though a bunch of sand? Sure a lot of good ones are there but they will ALSO be on lyla or in a collective, so why bother? Same with our end with clients. A good hobbyist will find me and will either know better than bother with leolist or eventually do research and find me in a better place. So yes, I would recommend avoiding it. All hassle, no benefit if you ask me. And verification is a joke on there. It means nothing. For recos and reviews: take one timer posters with a grain of salt. Completely disbelieve ones that only post for one person and no one else. If thats just a recent thing fine... he just found his dream girl but I mean EVER. And sadly, I would not trust reviews from agency SPs unless its from a well known Poster here or from multiple posters who have recoed SPs from other agencies or independents as well. Although the mods are pretty hardcore at catching those. I once had pages of recos removed because a stupid driver made fake reviews for girls hoping he could drive for them. I didnt ask for it, need it or appreciate it! So his one BS reco deleted a years worth of genuine ones. Thankfully the mods understood it wasnt my doing. Anyway, the sniffed it out because he only recoed SPs from that agency and funny... only on nights he woked. lol Wanted to throttle the guy. For his stupid 20$ he brought me (and others) to square one. Many members only trust recos for new SPs if they are done by members who word they trust. But as long as the poster has reviewed SPs that arent all from the same place and has reviewed SPs that have nothing to do with each other, its trustworthy. I'm so sorry you have been burned. Enrages me. May I ask your area? You may have already but if not, please check if there is a collective there. Google keywords like ___city/town name___ indy companions " ----------------------------" independent companions "------------" indy/independent sex workers collective Another good move would be to post what you are looking for in your area's section. I once found a regular client who had posted that he was looking for a lady with strong legs lol Not something anyone usually advertise but i contacted him and it just so happened we were a perfect match. Again, I was starting out back then so spent a lot more time on admin. I go for long periods without even advertising let alone perusing forums but... takes a few mins, doesnt hurt and may give fruit! We should make a thread for how much we've each lost... SPs and Hobbyists alike, too depressing though Again, Im so sorry for every cent you lost and all your frustration. Jessy

A question for the OP: could you perhaps go about this differently? The fact that you've been scammed on deposits multiple times indicates that something's up. Scammers have always been out there, but not everyone gets scammed. How do you go about choosing which SP to see? If you just go to LL (or wherever) when you're horny, and pick someone that the little head seems to like... well, getting some scammers is inevitable. The thing is, you have to do your research, and research takes time, and is best done when you're *not* looking for some action right now. As others have said here and elsewhere: look for a proper website. Do a reverse image search on the pics. Look for an established presence in the industry; whether that's an active and reasonably long-standing social media presence, or positive feedback from other clients. TBH the long-term presence alone is probably enough - it's all I really go on. Anyone pulling a scam simply won't last all that long before word gets around and they're forced to adopt yet another new identity, and so building up that long-term presence is almost impossible if you're just trying to make a quick buck from the next mark. I don't look at ads until I've *already* decided I might want to see someone and I'm at the point of looking at rates, screening requirements, contact methods, etc. That's what happens to work for me, and obviously YMMV... the point here is that a slower approach may serve you better than making a decision in a hurry. As regards looking for a regular: I get that this is the end goal for you, but again, perhaps... slow down? Providers get many, many messages from people claiming they'll be the best regular ever, and pretty much all of those are from people running a scam of their own (usually that they want a discount, I suspect). Claiming you want to be a regular before you've even met might be a red flag for some providers. Even on the first meeting, making it a regular thing probably isn't going to be on the agenda immediately. Think of it like a first date: do you actually *want* to see this provider regularly? No matter how well you might think you know someone from their online presence, the reality may be different. It happens, sometimes; I've met people in the past who I thought I'd get on well with, and... we just didn't really hit it off. That's not anybody's fault; it's just the way life goes, and you have to be prepared to simply accept that this time things didn't work out and it's time to pursue other opportunities. Finally, I'm afraid there's one thing I really must push back on: Hate to say it, but I think you're being unreasonable here. When you book a first appointment, you're booking that one appointment... and that's all. You met, and had fun, for the agreed length of time? You've got what you paid for. She owes you nothing more at this point. She said she's available for something regular? All that means is that she's happy for you to book again sometime; it is not a commitment to being available exactly when you demand it. The way to become a regular is simply to book again, and again, and again.... regularly. Telling her you intend to do that means very little; actually doing it is what counts. Please remember that the vast majority of people claiming they'll be a regular are, as I said, blowing smoke. No sane provider is going to abandon a tour for someone she's only met once, and the reason she didn't tell you about it before you met was that it's none of your business. If you *really* don't want to meet someone who doesn't tour, it's up to you to check providers' schedules and pick someone who doesn't - and if you take a long-term approach to your research then you'll probably just figure this out without explicitly looking for it, because most providers who are touring will talk about it. And if you're seeing someone regularly and you want to have a say in whether she tours or not.... well, to me that sounds less like being a regular and more like a SD/SB kind of relationship, which is an entirely different ballgame. If you want to keep her at home then you'd best be prepared to pay - in advance - for the privilege, and even then she may not agree. Hope all of that was of some use to you, or at least food for thought. Good luck!

You know how as time goes by, and you have had time to think about something, you see things even more clearly? Well it has been about a week, and here's where my mind is. You know when you were young, and you had that group of friends you have known all your life, a few good guys and usually that one girl who you grew up down the road from? And through your childhood you have all kinds of fun with these friends and it doesn't matter that one friend is a girl. Then as you get older, you all start to see each other in a different light. That girl you spent so much time with, had so much fun with, you have now noticed you feel all sorts of awkward around, and as you hit your teens you realize that you've developed a huge crush on her. As time goes on, you realize that she's still that same amazing girl that is just so easy to spend time with, but you stop because you can't convey your feelings, but every time you see her your heart aches, every time she spends time with you, your heart races, when you share a laugh and she rests her hand on your arm and all you want to do is kiss her, but you don't want to risk ruining everything. When you meet @Cheeky.char you'll have all those feelings come rushing at you. She is that girl you've known forever and had a crush on. She is that girl that you just want to spend time with. She'll touch your arm and your mind will flow back to those teen years, that heart beating fast, blood rushing through your body feeling of pure bliss.

Serious question: I've heard this a lot on this forum, "don't ask me for a picture [for free]" I understand why SPs would say that, no question. I am one of the folks who would gladly pay, say, $40-$50 to verify an SP is who she claims to be in her ad. In fact, in a way I do it frequently - I'll subscribe to OF if it's listed (and yes, @MsManda, I subscribe to your page* 😊) - short of that... Is there a generally accepted system for buying/selling a 'verification' picture? --- *Just remembered that you were in fact the reason I knew OnlyFans existed - read an interview you did, maybe CBC(?) - I literally had no idea that the sw industry existed in Halifax 🤷‍♂️ thank you :)

Let me begin by saying this woman is an absolute goddess! Her pictures don’t do her justice as she looks even better in person! Not only is her body firm and fit, she has all the curves in the right places with her soft velvety skin and beautiful full lips. Simply put, she will intoxicate you and leave you in absolute bliss and begging for more with her looks, scent, charm, and touch. She is a hard working and loving woman who will listen to your requests. She is very professional and passionate about what she does and makes safety and comfort her number one priority. Upon meeting her you will feel as if you’ve known her for years with her laid back vibe. She comes across as a woman you could approach at a bar and have a good conversation with. She will also give you that girlfriend experience with her kindness, intelligence, and positive attitude. Her massages are to die for! She puts in the effort to target areas that need relief. Her strength and passion combined will provide an experience matched by no other. She is an absolute must see! Treat her well gentlemen, she deserves the best!

Glad to know she is real but I would rather wait for her to provide an incall location where I don't have to worry about other room mates.

Sorry man, I don’t post publicly about the details of the actual service provided by any escort. No matter how good or bad the service is. Firstly, there are far too many variables between two individual people when it comes to sexual interaction. But mostly because I’ve been around so long that I know how much BS there is when it comes to escort reviews. Some provide positive reviews for free or discounted service. Some provide negative feedback as revenge or on behalf of a competing escort. I provide neutral feedback to confirm the girl is real, as advertised, and delivers service as agreed upon. @babyparadise does check all of those boxes.

To start off, WOW! She's even more stunning in person than her pictures lead to believe. An absolute gem no doubt about it.Saw her for hh, coming straight from work I told her I definitely need to shower, duh. She was so inviting, from the moment I stepped in the door, very calm, chill even. Definitely the kind of girl you would want to smoke a bowl and shoot the shit with. I felt very at ease and had no difficulty being myself (the odd little duck that I am).Her hands were soft and warm and oh so inviting, her skin silky smooth and her toned curves ermahgerd!She's very accommodating, and absolutely worth a visit. I'll save the details for your imagination.She's a queen fellas, so be courteous and she will treat you like a king.

Yes, I agree with you ladies. A one line Pm comes across as it may be from someone who is not serious about getting together however the tone of the Pm says a lot. I have learned that some here are 'men of few words' but that does not make them disrespectful. A message like the one Gabrielle posted though is disrespectful for sure. It is 'funny' some people need to be taught on Pm etiquette. I doubt they comunicate that way when they send an email or letter to anyone outside of this industry. But what bothers me the most is when I get asked by someone to send a message with my availability or upon my return when I have been away only to get ignored. As Meg said common courtesy is very simple to have and expected, especially if you started or requested the communication.

I'm a lawyer, so brevity is the least of my problems (smile) ... if anything, I tend to ramble on a bit. Its nice to get to know someone a bit as an icebreaker. Also, those e-mail conversations give you an easy way to start up the face to face conversation when you finally meet. Not to mention that its just plain f...ing rude to send a lady a message like that.

"Hi, when are you available." Just don't cut it lol