JoyfulC

Don't worry. It happened to me today too. I just said, "be right back, I gotta go to the bathroom" and no problem. I've had many guests need to do the same. Just remember to wash your hands and other bits well before returning. I usually try to add double the amount of time rounded up to the nearest 5 minutes I was gone to the session, not only to compensate for the actual time I was away but for any "cooling off" that may have occurred. We can't control nature. All we can do is try to have a sense of humor about it.

Absolutely right. When Spitzer was exposed for using the services of a very expensive prostitute, a friend of mine wrote to ask what the difference was between me and her --why could she charge a higher rate. I tried to explain that it wasn't so much about her -- there are many comparable or better women at my level and less expensive -- but merely that she was charging that much, and so her "club" was that much more exclusive. I know prettier and ladies very well liked charging much less. Perhaps the difference is not so much in the quality of companion or the quality of service, but the strata or "club" one identifies with. Which is why I don't understand why someone who wants a sub-100$ rate would bother approaching women who advertise rates higher than that.

Depends on the reason for the nagging. Sure, it might be easier not to bother nagging a kid to do his homework or pick up his room, or to nag a spouse to mind the budget or make the mortgage payment on time, but it's not always the responsible thing to do -- especially if there can be serious consequences if the thing being nagged doesn't get done. After I posted, I read what I wrote to my husband. He just grinned. He knows! Two minutes later, we thought of something he had to do the following morning, and he said "put that on my to-do list!" Because we both know that if I not only don't remember for him, but stand over him until it's done, it won't get done. Not only doesn't he seem to mind me nagging, he seems to prefer to to the alternative I don't; I wish he'd take charge of keeping himself organized -- but no one's perfect, and overall his good qualities far outweigh his faults. So don't judge everyone by your own experiences. Not only is this nag not jealous, insecure, desperate for attention or alone, but my partner of nearly three decades seems to rely on my being a nag when it counts. It's fair to say that he likes my nagging more than I like having to nag. I somehow doubt our situation is unique. ;)

I downloaded Angry Birds and the Seasons edition for my SO. I've seen very little of my iPod since! ( But I love to watch him having fun -- he gets so into it!)

I always say that we both come into this with certain expectations, and if those expectations can't be met, then we should both keep looking. But I see what some here are saying about "specials" with respect to touring SPs. I just worry that some vicious little group of "consumer activists" would try to create a bad situation for some visiting SPs, purely for the purpose of getting her to reduce her rates. Not only would that hurt any SP on the wrong end of such a scam, but ultimately it would blow back on local hobbyists as the town gets a bad rep. I see too, and agree with those saying that, in recent years, people have come to expect to have everything now, and to pay less. This is a harmful bill of goods that has been sold to us. Remember the ads about cutting out the middle man and paying less? Trouble is, we're all our neighbors' middlemen. Prices are great, but unemployment and underemployment is becoming a serious problem. There have been instances when I've given someone a better rate, but at my discretion and not because they asked for one. I'm far more likely to give a temporary lower rate to a longstanding regular who finds himself in tough times than someone I don't know who asks for a better rate or offers me less. Just say no.

I only nag my husband in private -- and unfortunately for all his wonderful qualities, I have a husband who sometimes needs to be nagged. The thing is, it's always stuff that he knows he has to do anyway. There's no getting around it. But he likes to wait until I'm at my wit's end from having to nag him. I always ask him if he thinks I enjoy having to nag him? I don't. I wish I could just count on him keeping track of what he has to do and just doing it in a reasonably timely fashion. Please don't think that I'm just naggy. It rubs me so the wrong way that there are many things that I probably should be able to expect him to do, but just let slide because I don't want to have to nag him to do it. I'd rather do it myself or go without. I have tried setting up to-do lists and email reminders for him, but you know what they say about leading a horse to water... If someone in your life is nagging you, ask yourself why. If they're nagging you to do something that you would rather not do, that's one thing. But if it's something you know you're going to have to do anyway, or there will be serious consequences, then ask yourself why you're putting it on your partner to nag you. Wouldn't life be a lot more pleasant without this?

My favorite will always be the one starring Mr. Magoo.

WRT streetwalkers suffering from mental illness, I think the remedy should be to overhaul our mental health care system -- not our prostitution laws. As it is, we are letting too many of our mentally ill slip through the cracks, living under deplorable conditions, sometimes homeless, not uncommonly incarcerated rather than hospitalized or in a supported living home, sometimes a threat to themselves and others. And why? Budget considerations? Are we becoming so much like our friends over the border that, rather than to bear the thought of anyone getting something they didn't "work for," that we're ready to forfeit any sense of civilized compassion? It's a shame, the state of our mental health policy. But as for those living in rooming houses or on people's couches, if they're working the streets, they're making money -- but unlike the rest of us, they're obviously not paying their bills first so they can get a place of their own which they can then use as a means to support themselves and whatever habits they might have. Over the years, I have found financial illiteracy to be the number one contributor to insecurity for prostitutes. Yet time and again, we see prostitution advocacy groups that want to take on the laws, take on the police, but which are light on offering life skills training to prostitutes to help them learn to to set up and live within a reasonable budget, for instance. This financial illiteracy ultimately affects us all. I believe it to be a key factor in the rate stagnation we've been experiencing for a couple decades now.

Unfortunately, things are changing very quickly with the border. I know someone who appeared in some porn south of the border who was recently denied entry on the basis of that. The US is out of control right now. They're denying access to people like Cat Stevens and a world-acclaimed Swiss Muslim prof invited to teach at Notre Dame University, for goodness sake. Last thing we need in this climate is our own government hanging labels around our necks. I hope it won't be a problem, but frankly, being an American myself, I don't see it going that way. There are serious problems in the US right now. We don't need to help them discriminate.

But it does happen. I've been told that it's illegal to discriminate on the basis of age or race, and for many businesses, I'd agree that they should not discriminate. For example, a diner should not be allowed to deny service to someone on such basis. However our business is somewhat different in that our level of comfort with someone makes all the difference in the world. For me, it is younger guys -- I'm just not into them. Wasn't even when I was younger myself. And still some will try to insist and, regrettably even find a way to lie and sneak into an appointment. In a case like that, what can you do? It puts an SP in a very difficult situation. Sorry this is happening to you, Victoria. I recommend that you ask prospective customers for a phone number where you can phone them back. It's not impossible for someone to get a new phone number, but it's a little more trouble, and so it might make it easier for you to track and identify those you wish to avoid.

Too bad there is no one to assist them and help them become better educated about their options. Me neither, but that's where it will go if the laws in the Criminal Code are struck. Some in the business seem so convinced that this is a victory. I say, we'll see.

Megan, it may seem counterintuitive but having these laws in the Criminal Code serves to protect us. Without them, municipalities would be forced to deal with us as just another business -- and for reasons I tried to point out above, that may not suit our business and many of the workers in it so well. Regardless what they do with the law, the stigma will persist. The laws we have right now (and current enforcement strategies) offer us perhaps the greatest degree of protection. I'm sorry to say it, but (as is so often the case) the only person who will benefit from this is the lawyer. SPs and customers will find themselves with worse outcomes. I guess I'm just totally shocked by this whole matter. I worked many years in the US, and so I've always had a deep appreciation of Canadian prostitution laws. I know how well we have it here.

Here are some concerns I have about licensing, and other suggestions: This business is not like others, such as operating a hot dog or chip stand, in which the operator invests in assets that can be seized if fines aren't paid. Tossing people in jail (for up to ten years! as one person suggested) may not offer a cost effective solution to the public, and may go further to encourage practices that put prostitutes' lives and safety at risk. Business licensing is often the domain of the municipality, and I've noticed that cities that license escorts generally exercise tremendous bias. In Calgary, for example, licensing fees for escorts are the third highest and by far much higher than those for categories with less expensive fees. The most expensive, I believe, was licensing for public or outdoor events -- and that's reasonable, given the likelihood that the event would generate noise nuisance complaints and higher than normal demands on law enforcement services. The second highest was for home alarm installers, and again, this seems reasonable because false alarms generate unnecessary costs for the city's first responder system. But escorts should come in a close third? By what reasoning? What problems do escorts cause in cities without regulation? On the contrary, unless someone is looking for us, we're almost invisible. The City of Calgary had at one time (not sure about now) a rationalization for this on their site, explaining that the provincial municipal bylaw act allowed them to set higher licensing fees for businesses that ran contrary to the community's sense of "morality." Mind you, they didn't *have* to set a higher fee for escorts -- they decided to gouge them because, after all, they're escorts. They deserve to overpay. Licensing will result in a greater number of prostitutes working on the streets and in other dangerous situations. Those most vulnerable will likely also be those least likely to be able or willing to get licensed: the drug addicted, the pimped, those with criminal records, illegal immigrants, minors and so forth. Further, one of the main purposes of the licensing process is to put on public record the identity of the license holder -- and let's face it, because of the stigma, many prostitutes do not wish their involvement in this business to be on their permanent public record. Many are young and looking just to make some money for school or to get started in another business, and have no plans to be in the business long term -- and therefore may well be extremely reluctant to have entered on their permanent record something that might come back to embarrass them or limit their opportunities later in life. And it goes without saying that having one's identity and info on public record is a stalker's wet dream. I believe that most cities that license escorts have as much or more street prostitution (and LE costs related to it) as those that do not. It's a mistake to think that politicians will take a reasonable, common sense view of any problem -- especially if there's an advantage to spinning it some other way. Many municipalities cite the escort licensing as a means to defer costs for enforcing street prostitution laws -- but why should law-abiding escorts pay for those who break the law? Especially when it's the bylaw itself that forces many of those prostitutes out onto the streets? That's a clear example of a disincentive. Licensing and zoning will also be boons to organized crime types and other greedy, unethical players. Red light zones will be relegated to the ghettos, as the NIMBY mindset takes over, but think again if you think rents will be cheap just because the area is rundown and unsafe. Such properties will be bought up by greedy slumlords, looking to gouge prostitutes. And who will stop them? You know what they say about where prostitutes can find sympathy. (Hint: between "sh*t" and "syphilis" in the dictionary.) Licensing costs will inevitably be passed down to customers. We already have a trend in this business that a significant percentage of customers are perfectly willing to deal with flagrant violators of the law (streetwalkers). This won't change with licensing. (In many businesses, customers are often reluctant to deal with unlicensed contractors. This certainly isn't one of those businesses.) I predict that licensing will encourage even more consumers of sex services to seek out unlicensed providers, for lower costs, more anonymity, and to avoid the possibility of being seen in areas zoned "red light." I am extremely disappointed in the women who brought this challenge. It makes no sense that the reason women are risking their lives on the streets is because it's illegal to work indoors. It's illegal to work on the streets! And the chances of getting busted for that are hundreds of times greater! I also don't buy the crap about the living off the avails law being so onerous. When was the last time we heard of anyone's legitimate life partner, child or other non-pimp person being charged under this law? Frankly, I think this lawyer saw these dumb bunnies coming. To challenge the constitution and win is quite the feather in his cap, and his career is the better for it. Unfortunately, prostitution in Canada -- and most specifically the safety of prostitutes and the fairness that they can expect from society has been placed in jeopardy.

Haha! I specialize in working with older guys, and many of my regulars are in their 60s, 70s, 80s and one I see once a year who will be 90 next time (... if there is a next time). It's not uncommon for it to be "'til death do us part" with my regulars.

One of the weirdest and best gifts I ever received was when one of my guys sang and played "Mountains O'Mourne" for me on the harmonica -- wearing only his longjohns. I was so tickled, I cried! I shall never forget it -- it was truly one of the most special moments of my life.

Not just since joining this site, but over the years in this business, one thing I've learned is that most of us have a fairly narrow window of others that we will exalt in and feel comfortable with. Trying to meet with anyone outside that is generally tedious to uncomfortable ... maybe even counterproductive. It's really best when we have the patience and discipline to hold out for someone who is right for each of us. But of course, to do that, we must first know and understand ourselves as best we can.

My baby just turned 32. Don't worry! They go through that independent stage early, but then backlash hard when they know they will always have a mommy that loves them without condition and will always dote upon them. Our girl is the biggest suck, demanding special treats and backrubs/foot massages when she visits (she perches on my massage table until I give in), and that we chat with her and play games online with her daily when she's not here. (...actually, even when she visits and I put my foot down on some of the aggressive Lexulous she and Fred play, I can tell by the evil cackles in the dark that they're playing behind my back. Trust me, children get even better as adults.

I have it. My daughter gave it to me a few years back. It is quite good. I'll try to remember to bring it next time I come into town -- maybe I can leave it at Carrie's for you to pick up.

Thank you, Grasshopper -- you brightened my morning!

Well, Carrie, a lot depends on what's going on in my horny little mind (my greatest sex organ) and some guys just tend to bring that out in me more. There are a couple guys both you and I know that, just hearing their voices on the phone gets my juices flowing. You once asked me what I fantasize about -- but if I tell, well... it's sort of like telling your wish on a star or your birthday cake candles. You can't tell or it won't come true. We should do some duos again this summer! Not sure if I can make it into town, but it's fun to think about.

Can't disagree with anything here. That's exactly why we have "money."

You know, I can cum more than once in an hour (sometimes even more than once in a half hour), but if I rush it, it's just not as enjoyable. More like "orgasm-lite."

Nope. Has to be Spidey. But he's in charge of sourcing that. I already have what I'll be wearing.