JoyfulC

Honestly, I don't know why some people think they need to "help" kids lose their virginity. It's creepy. Besides, the problem isn't kids not being able to figure out how to get laid. The problem is they're getting laid left and right, and accruing some serious adult consequences (stds, pregnancy, etc.). ..Christine..

Truer words were never spoken. In a nutshell, that's exactly how it works.

Yeah, well, while I'm at it, let me also note that I won't appreciate you bringing your mom either. ;)

I had a great time in Kingston earlier this week. This was the first time I posted my plans on CERB, and I'm glad to say that it worked very nicely. My only regret was that I couldn't stay longer.

I was a bit surprised by this thread. I guess I assumed that most of us would have all this done by our family doctors. Dummpy, would you not feel comfortable going to your family doctor for this sort of thing? Or do you think that the clinic is more up-to-date and knowledgeable with respect to STDs? Often clinics have a high staff turnover -- do you usually see the same doctor, one who is familiar with you, and vice versa? I have had clients tell me about going to their family doctors for prescriptions for Viagra and such. I guess it can be touchy when one doctor is treating both partners in a relationship -- or the whole family. But still, if you are honest with them, they will protect your privacy -- they are bound to by law.

Oh, the other thing I wanted to note is to please remember that your phone call might have come at a time when the SP is rushing around getting ready for an appointment or busy with something else. We independents don't charge enough to hire full-time receptionists to handle our phones for us. We're pretty much Chief Cook & Bottle Washer in our businesses. We have to answer the phones and email, manage our ads and websites, do the banking, do the housekeeping and laundry, get ourselves ready, and visit with customers. Sometimes the pace is leisurely -- other times, not so much. It's a good idea to browse through the SP's web site or ad to see if the info you want is there before asking. You never know what might be going on at the moment you decide to phone.

I suspect it might have been the blatant asking about bbbj that put the second SPs off -- and I can't blame her because that puts me off too. Do I lose business by refusing to discuss such things? Probably. But I do okay anyway. You can't win them all, and it's best to work at getting the business that's right for you and losing business from people who, from the first moment, put you on the spot and make you feel uncomfortable. I really, really dislike discussing explicits. For one thing, it's just not discreet. For another, it's not necessarily all that effective -- someone could say she does anything over the phone, but when you get there, that might not necessarily be what she's willing to provide (some things you can't commit to, sight unseen). And finally, there are just too many 1-handed typists out there who think that by pretending they're looking for an appointment, they can get a freebie. I had hoped when reviews came out that perhaps one benefit would be that guys could say that which we may not be so comfortable discussing. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to work like this. Some guy mentioned that I did something in a review a couple years back, and immediately about a dozen guys wrote or called me to say, "so-&-so says you do this -- can you confirm that?" Yeesh! :-/ The funny thing is, I'm not really all that restrictive in person. (I mean, within limits -- if you bring a sheep, I'm not letting you in.) And even in the few times where I have met someone and it was obvious once we started that I wasn't going to be able to satisfy the guy's interests, I was happy not to take his money and end the session on a civil note, with neither of us having wasted anything more than our time. I really don't see the point of committing to specific services or acts beforehand. If a guy finds it necessary to pin me down to something like that, then perhaps he would be happier with someone else.

These are all excellent suggestions -- however, a couple of them (such as booking a suite, limiting the number of appointments so as to be fresher for you, providing beverages and food) increase the SP's costs or limit her earning potential, and therefore will affect her price. No matter if someone is paying for a budget-priced service or a high-end luxury service, there's never any excuse for the SP answering her phone during the session. Some customers insist that they must leave their cell phones on and answer them -- but it drives me nuts when someone interrupts the session to answer the phone. It sure breaks the mood. Voicemail isn't really dead -- you can still rely on it in an emergency.

Hands down, the best advertising for me, with respect to bringing in quality customers, is Escorts-Canada.com. You do have to pay for your ad there, but it's extremely reasonable compared to, say, print classifieds. I have advertised on CL, and I have gotten new business from there, but it's such a pain in the ass. I'd rather pay to be on a site where the admin deals with the nonsense and where I can actually get service and support if there's a problem. I also find the customers from EC are usually seriously looking for an appointment, and not just looking for chums and freebies. I don't make huge amounts of money, but the price is more than affordable and I just budget it into the cost of doing business.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/14/technology/companies/14craigs*list.html?_r=1&partner=rss&emc=rss To make this link work, you'll need to remove the asterisk in you-know-what above. (Damn, this makes it hard to post links about this site.) ..Christine..

Meow! ;) But really, as long as you're accountable and open about other names you've used, I think it will be okay. Perhaps you could have a blurb about various names you've used on your site so customers can check you out against them. That might dispel any concerns they might have. It's probably better for you to be proactive about this than to have someone somewhere make a connection and have it blow up to some big thing, with speculation running rampant as to why you changed your name. (As you might have noticed, that's a major league sport on the internet.) Good luck! ..c..

You've encountered a fickle heart before, I think, Anita! But... better to have loved and lost, eh? ;)

Every once in a while, some guy will send me a pic of himself in which he's holding a gun. In a few cases, there was a good reason for it -- like he's in the military or was on a hunting trip when the pic was taken -- but gun people need to understand the emotional affect the sight of a gun has on us non-gun people. Seeing a gun in someone's hand is perhaps only slightly less of a turn-off for some of us than seeing needle tracks or suppurating sore. I don't mean for this to degenerate into a debate over gun rights. Only to note that, before someone distributes a pic of themselves with a gun, they should consider that it will be a huge turn-off to some people. If they don't mind that, fine. But if it isn't essential that their target audience share their gun views, then perhaps its best to get to know someone a little better before sharing gun photos with them.

So I guess men are getting pec implants these days too -- male fakers. How would I feel about that? Hmmmm.... if I didn't know they were fake, I probably wouldn't care one way or the other. I don't care if my partner of the moment is a toned Olympic athlete or a senior citizen with a life of bad habits behind him -- as long as he's wicked and playful. That's the thing that turns me on. But if I knew (or suspected) they were fakers?? Oh man! I'd have trouble keeping a straight face. .... (and yeah, it was the same thing with those hilarious hair plugs.)

And this doesn't even count those kinky alien abductions, eh? ;)

Yep, that's the way it used to be. I wouldn't mind seeing us move back towards that. Are there risks? Yes. On both sides. SPs are worried about their physical security, hobbyists about their privacy. I know I always get annoyed when someone cites the reason that I might call his wife as to why he doesn't want to give me verification info -- why would I want to do that?? But on the other hand, I'm afraid he'll be a robber or a predator. He's probably wondering why on earth I'd suspect him of that. The truth is that most SPs view customer privacy as essential, and most hobbyists would never do anything to threaten or rip-off an SP. It's those few who colour outside the lines that worry us all. It's why I have to go through security at the airport and I can't carry my trusty Swiss Army knife with me, the one I've had for 30 years and that never attacked anything more serious than a wine cork or a switch for toasting marshmallows over a bonfire. On one level, I do understand the concern that hobbyists have for their privacy, but on another level, I do believe our concerns for security are greater. The hobbyists have so many more tools at their disposal to check us out, assure themselves of who they're dealing with, than we do. They can check our reviews, go with someone who's been advertising a long time under the same name, someone known to members of our community. And if they have a problem, they can report it. But most of the time, we really have no reciprocity. We're opening ourselves to you, sight unseen you might say. But that said, I guess it hasn't resulted in as many murders, assaults and robberies on SPs as I predicted it would ten years ago or more. That makes it hard to argue that verification is necessary.

I leave it on. My best clients are married, like me, with families, like me. We have our heads on straight about what this is about. We're just normal people, solving a problem.

It's happened to me a few times. (And sometimes I think the guy sets it up to happen.) I usually just tell the lady that she'll have to take it up with her partner. After all, he's the one who has a contract with her. Not me.

I hate to see dead skin on a body -- or to feel that sludgy feel to skin that isn't regularly washed and scrubbed. When you're in the shower, soap up a washcloth and get to know every inch of your body -- THEN introduce it to someone else.

I love playing with my partners' nipples -- sometimes they love it, sometimes the burst out giggling, and sometimes I think they're just shocked. Today I saw this tattoo (hope this works) -- this gave me pause! What would I do if some guy whipped off his shirt and I saw this?? I'm seriously conflicted http://20.media.tumblr.com/v6rsP0Lfomonck0qcr3oJv5Wo1_500.jpg

I've actually come to appreciate the half hour session -- especially with regulars I see more than once a month. It's a nice, familiar relationship. There's nothing we can't accomplish in half an hour -- and done right, time can stand still in half an hour. Hour and 2-hour sessions are nice too -- especially with someone I'm not able to get together with as frequently. But the half hour session with someone I know well and who knows me well and sees me a little more often is turning out to be my hands-down favourite session. I think Ottawa is famous for its sexy nooners!

I can't STAND the taste of condoms -- especially knowing what's under them. I'll use them if someone requests it, but I'm not convinced that condoms are all that necessary for oral play. (And that's not even to mention that weird SQUINCHING thing latex does on my teeth -- nails on chalkboard!)

Jimmy Page

It's also weird from our perspective when a customer asks us to call him when we're available. ??? That seems to me like begging for business. I've had customers ask me to contact them by email if I were going to be in a certain area, and that's not too bad -- as long as you write an individual message to everyone who asks. (BCCs and such are so impersonal! And "marketing-y".) The customers are the customers here and so with the exception of notifications from touring escorts, it really should be up to the customers to check on availability. I mean, we make reservations with restaurants, eh? But what would we think of a restaurant that phoned us and told us what slots it had available? Or what would restaurants think of customers who asked them to notify them of availability? The other thing I'd like to address is customers who leave a number for you to call back, and when you do, their wives answer. ???? Don't put us in that situation, please. If the only number you can leave is one that your wife is going to answer, then please just keep trying us until you get us. What goes on between you and your wife is your affair -- leave us out of it.

That's a good suggestion. I know escorts who selected incall locations with security cameras in the lobbies just for that reason, and insist on seeing the customer as they ring them in (some guys will go out of their way to avoid or confuse security cams). For me, though, I always preferred just to ask for verification and leave it up to the customer whether to give it to me of his own free will. And for many years, there was no problem. It's only been in recent years that it seems that many customers feel we should bear 100% of the risks, while they bear none at all. (I never liked call display either -- I always figured, if someone wants me to have his number, he can give it to me. I really dislike blocked calls because it's like the guy is announcing that he thinks either he isn't or I'm not trustworthy. What's the point of going forward with that!? Call display and call blocking seem to generate more suspicion and distrust than they allay.) Anita, you're a lady with a good head on your shoulders! Nice to get to know you. :) ..c..