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Happy Birthday PP! Hope the day brings you all kinds of smiles! Catherine

My thoughts were focused on providers. Dancers are an entirely different flower. When I had my service I wouldn't hire dancers because their vines have thorns and can entangle in ways unimaginable. I wouldn't venture to weigh in on the emotional games played in that garden... Catherine

In Mod we trust... Catherine

Important to remember that it's not usually intentional playing at hand, but a lack of genuine communication. Our own personal little voices then try to make sense of it and usually make a mess of it. I think there is often too much thinking involved when it comes to lifes relationships in general and we complicate things unnecessarily for ourselves. Just take life as it is every day and let life live itself thru you not vice versa... Catherine

Trust. It is a word that is bantered around like ping pong balls when it comes to relationships. I look at it like this. Every day I get in my car and drive on two way streets travelling at 80 kms/hr and I trust each and every on coming car to stay on their side of the road. I have the same approach to all things in life, otherwise how could we step outside the door. Life is a game meant to be played, not watched from the stands and there is always risk at hand. I find it worth the risk, the benefits far outweigh the negatives. When I reflect on my life, I never find myself saying "I wish I hadn't done...", it always is "I wish I had..." Catherine

This is a great topic and one I think causes all kinds of hiccups. Accept the offer at face value, she just may feel a connection. I can only speak for myself in these matters because providers have very personal and individualized rules about spending time with guests outside of work. Mine are really simple...as long as the clothes stay on there is no money on the table for my time. No expecation of an envelope is there, it's just time to have a little bit of real life fun. The people I am closest to started out as guests and are now very dear friends whom I love, trust and cherish. I prefer not to enter into the sugar daddy realm as it changes the dynamics so dramatically that the complications are simply not worth it. There is a false belief that the girl comes out on top and most of the time it isn't true. Occasionally there will be a provider who can run a truly blatant hustle and guests need to be aware of the possibility. But most of the time, the provider is a graduate of the Disney "happily ever after" program and really wants the white knight to ride to the rescue in the end. Because we are pleasers by nature, it is easy for a "friend" to end up with all kinds of benefits that go unpaid for. It has happened to me and I have learned. I do have a couple of friends with benefits who I simply have a hard time keeping my hands off of and would never ask them for payment. Fortunately, they always make sure there is something left for the playtime. It isn't always cash, but it always balances out. My only word of caution is that if you spend time with a provider outside of work and for some reason there ends up being playtime, leave her an envelope or something of equal value that you know she needs. Most people don't realize that it isn't the money, it's the acknowledgement of appreciation. Other that this, I think it is paramount to remember that providers are just people and enjoy spending time with people who know what they do so they don't have to keep up the walls and live a lie about what they are doing. Just enjoy and appreciate the moment for what it is. Two people enjoying each others company. Catherine

I do realize that I come across very strongly on this topic and I make no apologies for it. Here is the history of why. In 2001 I was involved in a custody case and lost my children because I owned an escort agency. No internet, no pictures, no client testimonials, no reviews or recommendations. All they had was a list of ladies that worked with me. Not one of the ladies on the list testified. Not one hard fact was presented to prove anything. It's a moral issue, they don't have to. It wasn't a typical custody case, it was my parents sitting on one side of the court room and my husband and I on the other. Because it wasn't a criminal proceeding, there didn't need to be concrete evidence just simple affidavits with preconcieved ideas and false facts. Never was it proven or even alluded to that I was an unfit mother in any way other than my ownership of the business. Until then, my husband and I were volunteers at the school, drove car pool, tutored and were in everyway attentive and loving parents. I saw my children only thru supervised visitation for two years every second weekend until 2003 and for the last 5 years I have laid eyes on my 3 daughters once. My oldest boarded a plane the day she graduated high school last spring and came home. The other two are stuck in the US and I do not know when I will see them. They are subjected to constant emotional abuse because their "mother is a whore" and their father is a "pimp" (he never had anything to do with my business). If you think because someone doesn't show their face, a tattoo or changes their name they can't be put on trial for societies moral issues...think again. The information on boards can and will hurt people. I have already lost everything that's worth losing, but I will never forget sitting on the stand with a judge (who had been in rehab for cocaine use on more than one occasion) who asked insane questions about the intimacies. He really wanted the juicy details. I saw the questions for what they were, his own morbid fascination not gathering information about my ability as a mother. He didn't want to hear how many hours a week I was at the school in my childrens classrooms or how many special ed children I tutored. He wanted to know how many blowjobs I gave in a week and how many garter belts I owned. What do you think he would do with pages of detailed accounts of my work that can be readily printed out and put in a file? I remember the disbelief in my heart that tore me apart because I knew I was a good mother. No drinking, no drugs, a beautiful home with two parents that loved each other and the children even more. Not perfect, but as perfect as we could make it. I watched as the two people in the world who had betrayed me since the dawn of my memory walked out of the courtroom with my children because of what I do, not who I am, because of societies belief that we are morally corrupt, perverse and twisted beings that could should never be around children. Everything can be distorted to serve a purpose. My custody case was boiled down to someone eluding to base sexual acts for money, dismissing the human element of this industry in its entirety. This is not about the women that welcome the attention. There are some that are open about what they do, some have already lost what is valuable, and those that don't yet have anything to lose. Many of the providers on here are extremely young and naive. They think this will not come back to them at some point, but it will for many. A few may escape the fallout, but from my experience which is long and extensive it is a rare case that gets away unscathed. It could take years, long after she has left the business, but at some point it will surface. There are too many people out there with the ability to find everything and anything. The danger isn't from Joe Public who spots similarities and wonders. It is from someone we take into confidence. All it takes is one disgruntled ex-boyfriend or friend who feels wronged. With revenge in heart, a little time on their hands and her familys contact information, they can hide behind an email address and forward everything they can find to those she loves. Do you think a mother doesn't know her own daughter even if the face isn't showing? The shock is something that will subside, but to have the detailed accounts out there for everyone to read is more than most parents could handle. What if it were you reading about your daughter? Or worse yet, what if it were your daughter reading it about her mother? How do families heal after that kind of trauma? 10 years ago the family would "find out" but it wasn't in their face and it would fade with time. How do words fade when they can be read and reread and the knowledge that anyone can read them is there? I can give you at least a dozen real life situations of girls facing their pasts and none of them are easy to listen to. A few came thru it and triumphed but most are still in the struggles of trying to right their lives because of the results of being outed. And these situations happened before the internet boom so I can't imagine what the next generation will deal with as it happens. I urge everyone to give serious consideration to whats out there because until the attitudes in our society change this business can put everything we love at risk. There is a reason the word "discretion" is used so often. I wonder just how many really understand what it means... Catherine

I think the term polyamourous needs to be investigated a little more closely. This thread shows that we have the capacity to love so much more than any of us realize and often more than one person at a time. Hmmmm.... Yes, the Steelers vs Giants is one of the games to watch, but then... AREN'T THEY ALL!!!! If I'm in town, I'm in. But only if Patron is in the glass. You can take the girl out of the luxury but you can never take the luxury out of the girl... Cat

A negative review can't be posted here, but every other board not only welcomes it but seems to encourage it. If a provider is lacking a negative or mediocre review, the positive reviewers are labeled shills unless they are serious longtime posters. CERB is the only board I have found that has the "say nothing" stance. If a provider requests not to be reviewed she is instantly seen in a negative light. Why wouldn't a girl want every detail of her intimacies out there for her parents, grandparents, children, childrens friends and classmates, boyfriends, husbands, girlfriends and coworkers to read? Who wouldn't want every stroke recorded for the judge in her custody case to JO to while her mothering abilities are in question due to a vindictive spouse? If she's out there the public has a right to know every last detail regardless of the repercussions to her personal life and loved ones! These reviews, while entertaining and informative at times are ticking time bombs waiting to explode when a provider least expects it. We all get outed eventually and the damage these detailed accounts will do is devasting because of societal prejudices. I think asking a provider how she feels about positive reviews is the gentlemanly thing to do before posting one. Negative reviews should be limited to "WILL NOT REPEAT". JMHO Catherine

Gentlemen, Yes, she has a package! If you look at the picture of her squatting it is by far one of the best presented packages I have looked at to date. I know it is confusing for some because they come from a completely hetero mindset and have a hard time imagining such feminine beauty with contradicting genitalia. Do not underestimate the intensity of the experience of challenging your belief systems. Some of the greatest seducers in history were androgenous or transsexual. Women with strong masculine have been weaving magic for centuries. It does not imply one is homosexual, the combination is simply tantilizing and intriguing. I genuinely believe that given the right circumstances we all can enjoy things entirely outside our realm of comfort. If you want to challenge yourself, this is an experience worth having. I have watched the TS providers closely and Aylhin is by far the most incredible I have seen come to Ottawa. Catherine

Why things are posted can be anyones guess RubJunky, there are threads that defy logic and others that hit home. I wax ad nauseum about the isolation that SPs feel, but seldom is the topic of a guests isolation addressed. I know many that have been long time patrons of this domain, and they are often as isolated as we are. How does one discuss a topic like this with their buddies? Just getting it out is sometimes all that is needed to help clear the head, but admitting to anyone who isn't a hobbyist that you have become attached to a provider would be difficult. CERB is a place where emotions are not shied away from and are never belittled. Threads like this exist because it is a real life situation and this is safe place to unload. I know that the contributors to CERB bring humanity to this life that is desperately needed and cannot be found elsewhere. It was not my intention to infer you were a lesser man in any way, either online or in real life. That you are comfortable enough to tell your provider how you feel is good, and I wish more people would follow suit. But many are not there yet. Finding acceptance and common ground here on CERB may give them the confidence to speak more openly the next time they find themselves in a similar situation. Communication is always a good thing when it is honest, and it has the power to change the quality of lives forever... Catherine Have the black and grey out this year...Raiders all the way!

Don't worry if you missed the point. The fact that relationships are formed in many different ways and the emotional connection is undeniable when people are willing to just open up and be human is a little foreign to some in this hobby. For many it's not just about "gittin some". It's like a football pool. Either you're in the pool or you don't care to participate on that level and you opt out. It doesn't change the fact you love football and are a great fan. Some people live, breathe, and die football. Others simply enjoy it as a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon when the little woman doesn't have a list of "to dos" for them. I love that the participants here in CERB are willing to be honest about their experiences and just tell the truth about themselves. To all who "poured their guts out" here.... REAL MEN ONE AND ALL... I SALUTE YOU!!!!!! Catherine

I can't agree with you more! I scan the new posts regularly to stay in the loop. In other parts of the country there are fewer posts and most are simply inquiries about a new ad and if "anyone knows anything" about them. Sometimes there will be 2 or 3 inquiries for the same ad. My first thought is "JUST DO IT ALREADY!" It's like ordering something new off the restaurant menu. You may not like it but at least you tried it. This isn't a long term purchase, it's fun way to spend some time. The results are always one of three things... 1. It was great 2. It was ok, but not sure I'd want it again unless I had a hankering 3. Wasn't impressed, wouldn't do it again I worked for 3 years in Ottawa with 1 review on the other board and no board presence at all. Did it mean I don't give good value? Absolutely not! I continued to make a very good living without reviews. It was a rare occurance that someone would ask for reviews, and my answer was always the same..."try to find something out there that is negative from someone who actually has visited me." There is a whole world out there of people (both guests and providers) who choose not to participate on boards and function quite well. My income did not increase significantly when I joined CERB, but the quality of my time did. I feel more connected and really enjoy the interaction. But don't think because a provider isn't reviewed she isn't worthy of your time. She just may choose to stay above the fray because she knows what the other boards are like, and isn't aware of the quality CERB offers. Catherine

Darling Lurker and antlerman, Maybe we should make it a threesome and I'll keep company while the private dances are underway! Catherine

I love to sit and enjoy conversation over beverages. One simply has to be careful while doing so. I am not a regular indulger, and a couple glasses of wine, even spanned over the afternoon can leave me tipsy. As long as my guest does not take offense at my minimal sipping then it is all good. I think the extra time spent getting to know someone is a valuable addition to the experience and well worth the time investment. Catherine

Reviews are extremely subjective and should always be read with an open mind. I have read reviews and seen the numbers and wondered to myself about them. Some SPs welcome detailed reviews while others prefer the details stay private for a myriad of reasons. The main thing to remember is that everyone involved is human and has good and bad days. If you are seeking a particular service then it is common sense to follow the reviews where a provider has her services listed in the open. If you are looking for more than just the usual then you will need to read between the lines and trust your instincts. My most trusted and adventurous guests do not review and most are not even involved on the boards. CERB is an excellent jump off point for the beginner, but the reviews written here should not be taken as gospel. YMMV!!! When I recieve a request to meet a new guest and I know they like to write detailed reviews online, I try to refer them to someone who appreciates this kind of attention. Does it mean that providers with limited reviews offer a lesser quality of service? Not always... Catherine

Kitchener is a strange market. I travelled there a couple a years ago and vowed never to return. Could explain why there is a void in what is available... Catherine

From my perspective, it's whatever the client needs to feel comfortable for the visit. I always have a shower available with all the necessities, some like to kiss the water before hand, others afterwards. I would gently suggest that if you would like your hostess to join you in a shower, let her know beforehand. I shower fully before every guest arrives and my grooming isn't waterproof and is time consuming. It can eliminate some valuable preparation time if I know there is going to be showerplay requested. Never be afraid to ask. Catherine

It happens frequently and never have I had anyone behave inappropriately. I attended a charity function with a friend who is openly gay, I was sitting at a table with 9 other couples. 3 of the men at the table were guests. Acknowledging eye contact was the only indication of hello. We had a wonderful evening and still laugh about it to this day. There was dancing after the dinner and I simply proceeded to flirt with all the women at the table (straight women are a favorite pasttime of mine when Patron is involved!) and all assumed I was as gay as my date... Catherine

Reading this thread brings many thoughts to mind and heart. Because of the negative perceptions of this business, many SPs leave with no option but to simply cut ties. It is a struggle for an SP to leave for many reasons. Never assume the decision was flippant in any way. There is an emotional commitment to her clients and walking away isn't done on a whim. Most feel that terminating all contact is the only way to go. The shame and social rejection that comes from publicly admitting our profession is overwhelming to all those that do not have the inner fortitude to withstand and come thru it. Other professions allow a forwarding address and relationships developed are allowed to continue and are considered valuable, but in this there are so many challenges it is almost impossible to maintain relationships if a woman has been an SP in secret. The one reason that is consistent with all of those that leave for romantic motivations (which in my experience is the #1 reason for retirement) is the insecurity that comes from their SO. The fallout is usually nuclear in proportion if it is found out that there is a continued relationship with a guest after she has "squared up". Even the most stable of men will have issues with her work, and it will undermine everything in the union, and SPs realize this. It takes an extraordinary man to accept that her work isn't a threat, and underneath the facade SPs want most to be loved and accepted. So they are faced with a choice...the man who wants to love them forever or the man that wants to love them for an hour a couple of times a month. It's a huge gamble in my opinion. If a man cannot accept me in my entirety including my work, then he is not the man for me. From my perspective, a complete cessation of contact with my guests would be akin to cutting off a limb. First and foremost they are my friends. I tried to refer many of them this summer to other SPs and it was an complete and utter failure. The reason I continue to travel back to Ottawa is because I have guests here that count on me and leaving them hanging simply isn't an option. Does that mean we are to close? What is too close? Is loving someone wrong if it isn't in the "traditional" sense? I think the posts above show that guests truly are more than a venue to generate money and I want hobbyists to know that most professional SPs invest themselves emotionally in very deep ways. Always remember this profession doesn't usually attract the woman that is strong and whole. We become SPs because we are trying to fix the financial crunch and do not understand the emotional side of things until we are in it. Some find wholeness, it gives us so much. Others are destroyed by it. I find my work rewards me back in direct proportion to what I invest in it. Each and every one of us are bent in our own unique way. The common perception is that we are money hungry and greedy, but for the good ones it isn't true. We have an unusual ability to love and let go when the time is right. In the grand scheme of the Universe, all relationships are simultaneously precious and insignificant. We must live in the moment, cherish what is now and accept that nothing in this world is stable. Not the concrete buildings we reside in, the earth below our feet or the experiences shared. Every relationship I have is treasured for what it is right now. Tomorrow, if circumstances have changed, I will remember fondly as every experience builds who we are as people and that is what we are here for... Catherine

Absolutely!!! Cat

Darling Cowboy, Altho it's belated, please accept my sincerest best wishes for your birthday! I have a surprise for you, but you'll have to come and see me when I arrive in Ottawa to get it... Kisses, Catherine

I have to agree! I had the pleasure to visit CMJ with a friend in September and I had a fantastic time. Miss Jasmin met with us with a great smile and an attitude that made you want to stay for a while. I like having someone makes you feel at home and Jasmin does that in spades! We had the most wonderful couples massage and her bodyslide is to die for. The location is inviting and I am looking forward to seeing her again when I come back this month! Will I repeat...ABSOLUTELY! Worth the $....ABSOLUTELY! Catherine

Darling Amber, I am so sorry this is happening, I know how frustrating it can be. Just know the cream always rises, and from what I've heard you are cream! Catherine

Just make sure you discuss it with the agency before the SP arrives so there are no surprises. But I think they would gladly offer it when it was convenient for you... Catherine