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A treehouse? Really? I soooo want to be a part of this. I have a male patterned brain, does that count? I have a strap on with testicles? Please let me in? A tree house! I can bring beer, hotdogs and marshmallows; and I have mad cheap decorating skills. We could have a 108 flat screen HD, dish, pool table and antler chandeliers with lazy boy recliners all around! Wait, this is sounding very Fat Bastards... I'm not sure what purpose a male private section would serve but if our boys want it, I will support it. But I resent that I can't participate in it because I am so much better at understanding testosterone than estrogen!!!! cat

Avoiding the WOTs and tirekickers is why I'm email only. I'm going to start answering blocked calls whispering... "It's done but there's blood everywhere and there's a dog, what should I do with the dog?" My calls don't come from clients but telemarketers so it should be fun... cat

Fake bookings are the reason I don't tour. In '05 I toured from mid July to November. I came home with $1200 more than I left with. I consistently had more than 70% no show rate and it left me with a very bitter taste in my mouth. Today I am wiser and could probably venture out but it won't be far from home. I take my hat off to the ladies who live out of suitcases and hotels. Even with solid bookings, it's hard on the body and lonely for the soul... cat

I would hope no children would be present, starving or otherwise! I will say that any provider worth her salt would ensure you got your moneys worth if she was too uncomfortable to ask for it when you didn't present it and breathed a huge sigh of relief when you finally paid. You have never been in that position so you really have no clue how a provider actually feels the first time she meets you and you don't provide the envelop... cat

The fact that you insist it makes it more enjoyable for you without knowing if it made the experience more enjoyable for the providers is interesting. As Cleo mentioned, it brings power dynamics into play. Remember, we get paid to pretend to like our clients, no matter how distasteful they may be, especially if the rent is due or our kids need braces. I can assure you, until a providers trusts a client, she will be focused on whether or not she's going to get paid. It would make me question if the providers you choose are desperate for work and therefore vulnerable to your demands. The key is that you wouldn't know if that was how she was feeling if she was a professional. As a client, that's not a question I would want to wonder about given the nature of the service at hand. It would make me wonder why she would allow this, why would she take this risk? There is a reason, I guarantee it and it isn't because she trusts you given she has never met you... cat

THANK GOODNESS!!! The thought of that drivel being made into a movie was unpalatable but the fact Charlie was in it meant I would sit thru it just to watch him. Now I will be spared... cat

But when you go to pick up your car without paying, they don't give you the keys and you don't get your car back! This is a ridiculous statement to make. I would love to see what would happen if hobbyists started walking in and refusing to pay for service first, I really would. I am a provider that is fairly relaxed about the timing of fee collection and I have been screwed over many times because of it back in the day. Now, I have provisions in place that if a client screws me (without paying), it will bite him far worse than it will hurt me. I can also say that the first time clients that have stiffed me intended to do so before they ever walked thru the door because I have never in my career promised services I couldn't or wouldn't deliver. State upfront that you intend to pay on the back end and see how many appointments you get... cat

It would be fun to have Faulty on board for comic relief actually! The fact is I do run a business and I know I have to cater to guests somewhat. But when someone has rubbed me the wrong way enough to give me mental rug burns, it makes it exceedingly hard to have sexy time with them authentically. I'm pretty tolerant of newb questioners, tire kicking financially challenged inquirers reschedulers and high maintenance, constant ecomm guests. What is difficult for me is usually the timing. Murphy's law always sends these guys my way when my personal life is over demanding or things are stressful. This magnifies the annoying exponentially and at times I teeter on the fragile edge of ripping someone a new one. I always realize it's me that has the issue and I need to either ignore the request completely or send them a cut and paste response to ensure I don't cross a line. I can be quite cutting at times because I'm not fluent in sarcasm so I just drop an anvil on them when my edit button malfunctions and the damage is usually irreparable... cat

I don't think anyone is brushing the situation off, there is a B&S/Dangerous section to post the information in. There are places online to post this kind of information on other boards, that is their forte where any and all are welcome to post details. The other option is to call LE. It was an outcall to a hotel, no laws were broken and even if no violence occurred or indictable offence happened; a report is on file in the event there are future incidences to show a pattern of behaviour... cat

It really does depend on the provider. I am an email person, I send an introduction which is a small book if you're on a handheld but it contains just about everything you need to know plus links for other information. I prefer a gentleman spend a minute and send a reply with a bit of detail about himself, what he's looking for and any other questions. I will exchange emails after an appointment is booked as my time permits if the flow of communication is engaging. I have cancelled appointments because the emails presented red flags that weren't displayed during the initial booking emails so it can help with my screening. Inquiries that continue to ask questions already answered in prior communications are deemed Askholes and written off. Guests who insist on over communicating between appointments are at times annoying simply because of time constraints on my end. If I see someone 4 times a year but receive emails weekly, then it's disproportional to the relationship we have but I have several who have more than earned the privilege of daily communication and it's something I enjoy and look forward to. The better the client, the more time I'm willing to invest answering the comm's. In my books, a WOT is an actual time waster. Booking an appointment then rescheduling, moving the time, cancelling and rebooking etc. These are Wafflemeisters in my books. Move an appointment more than once and I raise an eyebrow. The next time I put a yellow flag on it, one more then I'm out. Wafflemeisters are second cousins to Twatwaffles from the far reaches of the Ozarks and not people I need to entertain. Ever. Be aware of the relationship you have with your provider and that will guide you in the communication style she prefers. If you haven't met her yet, then keep it simple and concise... cat

I'm a Neopets multi, multimillionaire. I justify it by telling people that it ensures I have something to leave my grandchildren... cat

Christine is right on every point. The oldest client on my dance card passed May 24 weekend at the ripe old age of 94. He was a delightful, crotchety ass grabber that saw me every 3 weeks like clockwork for more than 5 years. No viagra or cialis, just lots of skin and fun. I don't think men ever get to old to play... cat

I believe in taking each holiday as it comes. I celebrate both Thanksgivings and Christmas goes up on the American Thanksgiving weekend. It seems that as a society we are in such a rush about everything that we make shit up to rush... cat

The Jax' and Tig's of the world do make the pulse race but it is impossible to have them around long term unless you're an adrenaline fiend. Bad boys are big fun when I'm feeling naughty but to keep one as a pet is a little to much responsibility for me. That said, keeping any man full time is too much work for me even tho I simply can't live without them in small doses! Like the favourite, eccentric auntie who simply borrows OPC's (other peoples children) and returns the little bundle of joy at the end of the day; I like to borrow OPP's (other peoples partners) and send them home when I've had enough of the sticky kisses and fingerprints everywhere, bad boys included... cat

I'm all over that! We could have a Fox Hunt here at the Sanctuary! I have the furries, when are you back in Otown? cat

Honestly, give me a silver fox over frolicking cub any day! cat

Oh no no no you don't! Everyone knows lawyers were spawned from Lucifers loin after he was cast out of the heavens as part of his revenge on man. I read it online so it must be true! I'm quite sure she had nothing to do with it... ;) cat

It would be far easier to list those that don't like mature gentlemen. Let me see, I can't think of one... ;) cat

I discriminate on a regular basis... I discriminate against those that send me emails with vulgar language or ask blatantly stupid questions. I discriminate by denying services to those who arrive at my location drunk, under the influence or set my spidey senses off. I discriminate against those that send me cock shots. If I have two gentlemen vying for the same appointment time, I discriminate against the newer client by allowing my regular to have the spot. I discriminate against men who are negative and want to bitch at me about their wives by showing them the door. I discriminate against those that have poor hygiene. I discriminate against anyone who will not follow the basic principle of treating me with the same respect I show them. I discriminate against anyone whom I feel is vile, crass, unethical or in any way violates my personal sense of universal balance. I would gently suggest to those who claim she should take all comers who have the cash to sit quietly and imagine what it would be like to kiss someone they would never want to be intimate with. Imagine someone you feel a physical revulsion to and then try and feel their tongue forcing your lips apart, their saliva mixing with yours and all you want to do is spit it out and bite the invading tongue. Imagine the feel of their hands roaming your body while your skin crawls in an unwinable attempt to escape. Imagine you having to part you legs and let them penetrate you while not only are you controlling the urge to throw them off you but you have to pretend you are enjoying it simply for cash that you don't want; in order to maintain the Canadian politically correct line of thinking or keep your name off the negative review boards. Imagine trying to perform oral while controlling the gag reflex to lose your dinner and constantly reswallowing your own vomit while smiling because he's watching you. Imagine having to look at them 3 inches from you, feeling their sweat dripping on your face, their exhales defiling your inhales and their body on top of you and you can't leave because... It's illegal to discriminate! For once, just try walking or imagine walking in our shoes. This isn't about being politically incorrect, it's about knowing what our boundaries are and respecting them. Service industry or not, you can't compare what we do to massage therapy, hairdressing, dentist, doctor, chiropractor or any other hands on service professional. I believe that I have the right to choose who I share my body with based on any criteria I deem important to my physical, mental and spiritual state and like Sandi, I may not share this providers belief system but I support her right to choose who she lets enter her most intimate of space, her body. I lived the above experience once and I will never do it again, I don't care if it's illegal to discriminate or not. I will continue to screen my clients as I see fit and if I want to post an ad that contains a "DON'T BOTHER CONTACTING ME IF ANY OF THIS APPLIES TO YOU" list, I will... cat

Actually, it does. When I singled out East/West Indian it effectively eliminated Indian, Black and Asian. All three of these races populate the West Indies so it was easier to say whites only rather than outline who I wouldn't see... cat

Mighty Pen's words speak truth. There are times a provider hasn't prepared for the appointment by keeping track of requests. That would require keeping records and that is something quite discouraged by hobbyists. I don't provide a menu or promise a single service when I book my appointments for this reason. If a guest has a check list of activities that must take place during the playdate, I'm not the provider for him and I'm clear about this upfront. If a guest let's me run the session the way my intuition tells me he will leave smiling and completely satisfied. Walk thru my door with specific services demanded and you will be shown the door but I don't keep the envelop. I think it's dirty money at that point and brings no good to my life from a karmic level. A good provider trusts her instincts and if her spidey sense is tingling, the agreed upon services are at her discretion. She needs to be honest about why she won't provide the agreed upon services if she wants to make the appointment work. Won't kiss? Probably a hygiene issue at hand. No shower? She has probably booked appointments after you that weren't on the books when you set up your appointment and won't have time to redo her hair after you leave; or she feels it's a bad judgement call from a safety perspective. There are a 100 reasons the menu will change. Has the contract been broken? Yes. Is she required to give you a refund of some sort? No but if she's smart she will make it right. It's good business to be honest and keep clients happy. This business is only viable if you can build repeat business and violating the agreement doesn't accomplish that... cat

It's easy to say "crappy reason" but the truth is we don't know why she has specified the race of her guests. I had a girl work for me who was gang raped by a specific race and she simply couldn't service guests of that race because she couldn't guarantee that she'd be able to go thru with the appointment. That was before PTSD was better understood but even passing someone on the street who was the same build or dressed the same as her assaulters would send her into a tail spin for days. The fact is this provider clarified what she feels comfortable with is all we really need to know. The OP wanted to know if he should disclose his race before meeting a provider and the answer is "yes" if he wants to alleviate any concerns he may have. The truth of the matter is that most providers don't have a problem with race because we know all humans bleed red... cat

I think the OP is asking a valid question if he is concerned about putting himself in an awkward situation upon arriving at a playdate. There can be a number of non racist reasons why a provider prefers to exclude a certain group. In my younger years I was married to a brown man and I didn't see East or West Indians because he was very well networked in those communities. I didn't want to open the door to a surprise visit from someone my husband may cross paths with. Ladies have a life outside of work and if they feel there is a risk of either being found out or causing someone they love embarrassment, they may opt out because of personal ties to a community. She may have had a bad sexual experience and her comfort level isn't there due to memories it may stir up while being intimate with someone. No one wants to have a melt down in front of a client for something unrelated to him or have him feel her discomfort when he is there with hard earned dollars for a playdate that isn't going to end well. Emotions are hard to control at times. In an industry that is constantly trying to overcome unfair assumptions, I find it's more prudent to simply not assume. If you have any concerns about your race, run it by your provider! She will tell you if she has an issue... cat

I'm out to all in my life. The reactions were varied, some stepped up and supported me; others disowned me. I prefer to know who I can count on so I disclose it up front and allow people to make the decision for themselves to get to know me or not. I'm so far beyond caring what anyone else thinks at this point in my life that it is easy for me to do. The only time it causes issues is when people are not honest with themselves about how they feel about my work. They misrepresent themselves as being ok with it when in fact they aren't. That has caused some rough patches in the past and now I take a long time to get to know someone before I let them get close so I know I've done my due diligence in protecting me and mine. I do believe that the industry as a whole needs to be prepared to shed some light on the realities to dispel the myths but I understand those that fear the reaction and chose to closet their choices. I view every interaction I have with the "squares" as a chance to challenge their preconceived ideas and as a little one on one public relations. I don't fit the stereotype (as few of us do!) and most often than not they go away with food for thought. Planting the seeds of doubt and having patience is all it takes to change minds... cat

The total membership of my "take 'em to the bank" regulars do not write recos. Ever. I have few recos in over 5 years, I advertise rarely and yet I exist comfortably and with total satisfaction in my business. Reco's are not the be all to end all. They don't add to my business, if anything they discourage the kind of client I like to attract at this point. So really, having lots of recos depends on the provider and the kind of business she's trying to establish. I understand the OP's intention as well meaning but we are all different in our goals and objectives and a guests never has to kiss and tell... cat