cat

I have a classic Volvo and her name is Vivian! I always name things that an important role in my life... cat

Haggling isn't something that should happen but it undeniably does. I am speaking to true negotiating where both sides are committed to reaching an agreement that works for both of us. Because I don't tour and I have a 2 hour minimum that often will put me out of reach for local hobbyists to see regularly, a retainer is a happy medium. They aren't able to hide $800 a month to see me every two weeks because their monthly budget is $500. Am I willing to walk away from that $6000/year if the guest is a perfect fit for me in every other way? No, I'm not because finding a good fit isn't easy for me. I set my retainer rate, they don't and I will gladly tailor it to fit both our needs. They aren't haggling my rate if they are willing to make a long term commitment to doing business with me and pay up front for the privilege of a retainer rate; it's a genuine negotiation. Give me a dozen retainer guests over 100 full fee "sometimes when they feel like it guys" any day... As it's been said, every provider has her preferred business model. My niche is catering to retainer clients who prefer long term arrangements. Keeps my profile low, my income steady and my job satisfaction level high. Win/win in my opinion and has nothing to do with haggling... cat

I sustain myself on retainer guests, I seldom advertise but when I do it's because I'm seeking just a couple of those who want something long term. I will meet 100 guests to find 2 or 3 that "fit". I enjoy meeting new guests but in reality the vast majority of hobbyists are not good candidates for something long term and are very seldom "take it to the bank" reliable even if the price is right. I understand what the OP is saying but rest assured, so many guests come in singing the "I'll be here twice a month if you work with me on the rate" and when you do, they don't follow thru because what they are doing is simply hustling a deal for the moment. Been there, done that; got the t-shirt, burned it, took a shower and won't do it again. Now, if a client wants to renegotiate my rate then we look at the triad. Time, service, money. If they want a more reasonable rate, then they either have to sacrifice on time/service ratio OR prepay for set number of sessions to lock in the discount. This way, I know he's coming back. The "we click so therefore financials take a back seat" doesn't pay the bills. I'm low volume, I offer extraordinary service in the lap of luxury and if I had a dollar for every man who "promised" to be a good client I could by a new Volvo. A girl can't take promises to the bank. If a guest wants to have the discussion of keeping the service affordable for the long run with me then he will have to make a commitment that is more than lip service. If he's willing to show that he's serious, then I doubt any provider worthy of her fishnets would decline... cat

Bacon and Egg Salad Toasted, buttered Ezekial bread with double yolk egg salad. Mash the eggs, mix in finely chopped bacon, celery, onion, dill pickle (wee bit) then add copious amounts of Dukes mayonnaise. Season with sea salt, pepper and a dash of mustard powder. Let sit in the fridge for at least a couple of hours before eating. Top with shredded lettuce and kettle cooked potato chips. As a child, I ate this accompanied by Witches Brew; soda fountain drink that had equal amounts of each available soda mixed together with a giant kosher dill dropped in with a tablespoon of pickle juice added in at the end. Now, depending on the meal it's coffee or water... cat

I feel that the SUI looked into it and yes, his initial approach was less than desirable for establishing trust but it was at least genuine. I haven't met the man myself but the ladies that I know who met him personally spoke highly of him and of their dealings with him. I don't buy that he was muscle for PK, that just screams sensationalism. I think he had the right idea, just took the wrong approach. Honestly, there are things reported as fact in both articles that I know to be untrue so I'm not buying any of it. If even 1 fact is wrong, I question everything. To me, it doesn't pass the smell test. The fact that there may very well be a serial killer in Ottawa targeting SW's that has gone unsolved for over 2 decades makes me wonder. They don't have a problem allocating funds to finance a team to reinvestigate this officer after SUI cleared him but they don't have the resources to find out who's killing us? cat

Be full of care when reading what is written in this article. What people say "might" have happened is hearsay and we all know gossip runs rampant at times. Reporters will print anything that sells papers and we should never take what is written at face value. I've been a News at 6 sound bite and several front pages when I was in the US and the only thing true in the reports were my actual charges. Everything else was just nonsense gathered from people that didn't even know me or outright lies from those with an axe to grind. I feel this investigation is an utter waste of tax payers money that should be allocated to finding the person who is killing sex workers here in Ottawa. It's been going on for 20 years... cat

From one mature provider to another, I will say it isn't easy. I've tried and have decided that the headaches and heartaches simply aren't worth the investment at this time in my life. The work just brings too many issues, even with those who know and understand it when combined with a strong will that we old broads seem to embody. What I would like to ask is if your relationship has ended, is there a need to seek another at this time? If you are anything like me, you have lived to raise your children and take care of others. I'm assuming here but I have never met a mature provider that wasn't instinctively nurturing, even if they haven't had children and most of us have sacrificed everything for those we love. Now your family is grown or almost, perhaps it's time to have an authentic relationship with yourself! I've decided to simply live each day and enjoy those who are in my life during those moments. I do have friends in my personal life but it's on my terms and my time. I've adopted a new approach. Rather than looking at things from a duality perspective ie. positive/negative contributions, I only consider if a relationship brings balance to my mental, spiritual, physical being. If a relationship doesn't contribute to the harmony I craft in my life then I bow out. I love but don't commit in a traditional way. I'm spending time with me, doing the things I love and want to do. If someone I enjoy wants to tag along, great! If not, great! If I want someone to sleep over, they can stay. If I want to wake up alone, they go home. Anything that disrupts the balance I'm creating is immediately eliminated. Embrace being a woman of mystery! Like Kathryn said, you do need to disclose your profession before intense intimacies take place but you would be amazed at how much fun you can have without going all the way. I get all the hard action I need with work but I love the foreplay most. I will spend months getting to know someone and never go further than high school couch make out sessions that have been the described as the best sex they've ever had without sex! Until I know they are trustworthy, they don't need to have information that is sensitive. Protect you and yours foremost. Life is suppose to be fun, make dating an adventure and I have chosen to make these experiences fun and without commitment or drama. They are simply for me to enjoy, nsa. Perhaps spending some quality time with you, for you, by you is in order. The right man may fall from the sky into your lap when you least expect it but if he doesn't then you are still living a life worthy of you, that you will find fulfilling. My grandma always told me that she never regretted anything she did in her life, she just regretted the things she didn't do so that is my focus. I'm just doing the things that I enjoy on my terms and seeing where life takes me... cat

IMO... An incall is a necessity unless a provider wants to run the 8pm to 5am shift until she has her license revoked for night blindness and her walker is too hard to get in and out of the backseat. Outcall clients are usually at night and are harder to handle in general because they are more spur of the moment. Day clients are seldom under the influence and usually able to plan ahead a bit. My clients are clear on what they expect from the location I use. I had to check into a hotel this spring for a few days during repair work and had clients cancel because they don't like hotels for their visit. My location runs me 30% of my gross income. I realize this is disproportional and if I had to relocate I'd be screwed. If I could run outcalls from 7am to 6pm, I would have that 30% (less gas as I already pay for my car and insurance) back in my wallet. Given I'm a low volume provider it is doable, traffic wise. But my guests need me to provide the location. This thread made me take a peek at my books, perhaps it's time to raise my rates... ;) cat

A huge thank you to MisterT, Loneskater and Spud for their hard work tonight! The Social was in a great location with amazing attendance! Thanks fellas! You did a phenomenal job! kisses, cat

@webothscore - Perhaps I am just dense. I do find your statement ambiguous. Actually, ambiguous isn't the word; I'm unsure of the word I'm searching for... Providing an incall doesn't negate the time before or after an appointment that is eaten up by travelling for an outcall. I have a full of hour of sterilizing and cleaning up after an incall appt so travel time is not an issue when comparing. On top of the labor involved of maintaining an incall is the expense. Hydro, rent, wifi, furnishing etc. Trust me, I've done both and incall is more expensive. I've compared the numbers and the only reason I offer it is because I'm no longer willing to run the roads. I'm willing to eat the overhead at this point because dealing with outcalls is a power dynamic I'm not willing to play with anymore. Incalls cost us more therefore should be more expensive. Period... cat

Can you elaborate? I'm afraid I don't understand this... cat Additional Comments: Can you elaborate? I'm afraid I don't understand this... cat

I agree with Christy, incalls should cost more. Most workers keep a second place to run incalls from and that overhead is far more than transportation costs. Until I came to Canada, incalls were always more expensive from $20-50 per session depending on the quality of the location. The problem is that the business in Canada is already so competitive that anything charged over the going rate will cut into the bottom line. If I adjusted my prices to accommodate the added expense of keeping my location it would put my prices into the touring girl range and I wouldn't be able to keep myself afloat without touring so I eat the loss to stay local and still competitive... cat

And this is why we screen. Not so we can acquire a man's information for nefarious reasons; simply to try and keep ourselves safe... cat

JUST TO CLARIFY... I in no way condone men seeing under aged sex workers. It is illegal, that's obvious. My words were simply my experience as a young woman who preferred older men and still does. I'm not encouraging any hobbyist to seek out underaged girls... cat

I have found this thread really interesting. I started work at 18 by my own volition and never found the clients I serviced to be seedy or slimy. That said, I looked in my mid 20's and seldom was I asked about my age. I knew what I was getting into, had given it a couple of years of thought before hand and I've never regretted the decision. I have a fairly strong personality and have never had a problem handling men even at 18. I could have easily worked at 16 from an emotional maturity stand point. The foundation for my business today was there already as a teenager and I've changed little in the way of customer service since I started. On a personal level, I'm divided by the "18 is acceptable" mentality. At 16 I started dating older men in their late 20's whom I met thru my older sister. I looked well over 18 and they never asked my age until we had been dating awhile. Most times I lied about being older and it was never questioned. By the time I was 18, I graduated to men over 40 and I have preferred men at least 15-20 years my senior ever since. Boys my own age held no interest for me. I didn't want to go to parties where everyone drank themselves into oblivion and pawed at me; I didn't want to hang out watching videos and making out on the couch or driving around. I wanted to go and do things. I loved live theater, racing of any sort, good restaurants and intelligent conversation. I wanted to travel and see the world outside of the little bit of swamp I grew up in. Boys my own age didn't do those sorts of things. The sex part of the dating was secondary to me. The intimacy was fun, I learned so much and I would do it again in a heart beat. I think older men can offer a better quality relationship because they are experienced. That said, there needs to be more on the mans mind than just getting into a young girls pants. Predators are always disgusting but I don't think we should paint all men with the same brush just because they end up in a relationship with a younger than 18 year old woman. Two of my daughters are involved with older men and I would say it's been a good thing. My 21 year old has lived with a man 17 years her senior for 3 years and is helping raise his 3 sons while attending University full time. They met when she was 17 and she moved in on her 18th birthday. Many were appalled and her step mom tried to have him arrested before she turned 18. I know my daughter, this man didn't take advantage of her; if anything, she took advantage of him. She has had the best 3 years of her life since 9/11 hit and the sky fell in on our family. My other daughter is 23 and dating a man my age. He provides her with opportunities she would never have on her own or dating a man her own age. He adores her and she him. They aren't marriage minded but they live together and seem happy. She's learning about being a grown up from someone she will listen to (God knows she doesn't listen to me or her father) and seems to be getting pretty good advice from him. Our society seems to forget that teenage girls mature faster than their male peers and some of these young ladies are more than ready to experience life with someone who can show them what's out there. The only relationship I had with someone my own age was with the father of my children and while I don't regret it on any level, I do think my life today would be very different if I had stayed true to my nature and married someone more mature... cat

I genuinely feel that I have an obligation to share with people about the industry as I know it and have sat in Regents shoes on many occasions. I consider it a very personal PSA Coles Notes that I willingly hand out for free. What I have learned is that I don't need to change their POV, all I need to do is put a face on it that challenges their beliefs. Meeting sex workers that don't fit the stereotype makes people reconsider what they believe to be true about the sex trade. It makes them question what they think are facts. I never take an activist stance, I'm very easy going in my delivery; avoiding the hard line presentation so they have nothing to push back against. Having them repeat their mistaken views verbally simply entrains it deeper. Instead I bring a light hearted tone to the conversation, smiling when I deliver the truths of my story. I've worked in every aspect of this industry save SWing and would do so again in a heart beat. I don't glamourize it but I also bring to light the good that I see. When they start pointing into dark corners, I simply parallel the facts with other lines of work equally as perilous and that sheds a certain inarguable light on things. Remember, you don't need to "win" the war. You just need to show them there actually isn't a war going on, simply a life as we chose it. Changing a belief starts with one seed taking root and growing. Not as quickly as we might like, it may be buried deep and take a long time to break the surface which requires patience on our part with liberal amounts of sunshine and water. Most often, they will supply the sunshine; they will reflect back on the conversation time and time again, every time allowing your essence to influence their perceptions just a little more. All you have to do is water it. Just don't over or under water, both will kill the seed before it can take root and flourish... cat

From the other side of the coin, yes; my work has made me far to lazy to date. I have no desire to do the dance, the "get to know you" or any of the accompanying bullshit. I have male friends I can just hang with to get a testosterone fix, a cuddle with a movie or a helping hand to move my furniture and I have no accountability to them for how I choose to live my life. I don't sleep with them, I just enjoy them as people. With years has come the wisdom to tailor my business to only entertaining men I enjoy sexually. When our time is over they leave; no drama, no muss, no fuss. I'm not accountable to them either for how I choose to live my life. It works for me, I know myself well enough to understand a traditional relationship could never work for me again because I won't deal with the day to day nonsense that being with someone regularly entails. Perhaps I will one day want to have someone underfoot but for now I like the way my life is... cat Additional Comments: From the other side of the coin, yes; my work has made me far to lazy to date. I have no desire to do the dance, the "get to know you" or any of the accompanying bullshit. I have male friends I can just hang with to get a testosterone fix, a cuddle with a movie or a helping hand to move my furniture and I have no accountability to them for how I choose to live my life. I don't sleep with them, I just enjoy them as people. With years has come the wisdom to tailor my business to only entertaining men I enjoy sexually. When our time is over they leave; no drama, no muss, no fuss. I'm not accountable to them either for how I choose to live my life. It works for me, I know myself well enough to understand a traditional relationship could never work for me again because I won't deal with the day to day nonsense that being with someone regularly entails. Perhaps I will one day want to have someone underfoot but for now I like the way my life is... cat

I agree with Chantal, grab a card and write the same sentiments in it that you did here. Let him know that random acts of kindness shows great character and is appreciated. Perhaps a small gift card from Best Buy or Tim's or Starbucks. Cash even! If he is like most kids from a divorce who is aware and considerate; asking his folks for money isn't something he does unless absolutely necessary. Something in his wallet just for him so to speak. It's good to read stories like this... cat

The problem is that not all intact men are built exactly alike. If phimosis presents then it can be painful for the gentleman with certain movements which requires the provider to have insight and skill in handling and there could be hygiene issues at hand (and often there is in these cases). For men with excessive foreskin, keeping a condom on him is a challenge and requires a certain skill level to ensure everyones health and safety. Some intact men look circumcised when erect, others have enough foreskin to tie in a bow when hard. Learning to deal with the variety takes time. A provider gradually accumulates the knowledge and experience she needs but remember, we have no school to go learn these things. Every new twist is learned in the trench while the bombs are dropping all around us. Most of the time, the provider will grow into it. When a provider is in a position where she knows she doesn't have the skill set she needs, then she is better to bow out, imo. If she never becomes comfortable with it being intact then it is a personal preference and it is her right to decline. cat

I don't have an issue with a guest wanting MSOG but it's a rare man that can even attempt it when I'm done with him after a single SOG. Like Emily, my guests come to me for an experience and I would rather play hours together building the tension. My guests derive as much pleasure from the journey as they do the destination. Delayed gratification is indeed the ultimate pleasure in my opinion and I specifically seek out those men who share my passion and inclinations. That said, a provider who posts an hourly fee then evicts a guest as soon he shoots is indeed asking for an issue. The "paid for time not services" comes from the US where escorts are required to cloak their business in a veil to protect themselves from LE. We are not required to do so here and providers have a choice of offering either an a la carte menu or an all inclusive buffet and everything in between. It is up to the guest to explore what a provider is offering to ensure it meets his expectations for the visit and a provider would be wise to be upfront about her chosen business model if she wants return clients. I believe there is the perfect client for every provider and vice versa, we just need to be willing to communicate clearly in order to find each other... cat

Personally, I do prefer an uncircumcised man for those long, extended play times. I do not like anyone, cut or uncut who is unclean. The circumcision has nothing to do with hygiene. I do know women who do not like an uncut man and while it baffles me, I accept their preference. My gentle suggestion is to accept her position as a personal preference and move on. There are plenty of us out here who appreciate a man who is intact. Just make sure that your hygiene is IMPECCABLE and you shouldn't have an issue. This is why ymmv is in the urban dictionary, there is always the chance that the key doesn't fit so just go try another door... cat

It also depends on where a woman is in her hormonal cycle. When I'm at peak, my nipples are so sensitive that anything more than baby soft touches are painful but the rest of the month they are pleasurably over sensitive. I also find it depends on the play at hand. If there is a build up of intensity then the touches reflect that and complement the passion. Just ask your provider, she'll know exactly what she likes... cat

Absolutely! I remember when I first started escorting, I considered dancing and ruled it out because a girl actually had to know how to put on a show and I have 2 left feet! I loved the performance and the showmanship the headliner would bring and the club girls would constantly try to up their game so maybe they could headline one day. A couple of weeks ago I was at a club here, it was a very quiet night for both clients and girls; the stage was empty. The manager and I were kibitzing and he motioned to the stage suggesting I go up. I told him I would rather put a man on that stage and have my way with him than dance. (yes, I'm that bad a dancer). He laughed and replied "just pretend there is a guy there! That's all the girls do." and I realized he was serious. It was a sad realization for me. The game has changed and not for the better in my opinion. An art was lost... cat

SS, you must be talking about phone inquiries without pictures? I have often wondered this as well. As an agency girl, we spoke directly with the clients and gave descriptions. I would always be accurate with 5 days on both weight and measurements but would still get asked "So are you slender or heavy?". Because I was a 34DD-27-34 guys would say "So you're small breasted?" (Duh! 34 is my rib cage NOT THE SIZE OF MY BREASTS!) or "You must weigh more than that with measurements like that." and I would just shake my head. Numbers are irrelevant unless you know the bone and muscle composition of an individual. Growing up, my best friend was the exact same height and weight as I was but wore pants 2 sizes smaller because she was solid rock muscle. I think because men as such visual creatures but have a more linear way of thinking, they like the numbers to try and sort out if we are what they think they like... cat

Well said Kylie! I do multihour, day and extended visits often and having a fuckathon is not an option on my menu anymore. I'm a low volume provider so my busiest days are 2 guests and I don't feel the need to have sex 8 times in a day. A day visit would start with some playtime then out for lunch and perhaps an event like a wedding or a show. If we ate at the event then we would head back for more playtime and perhaps a hot tub and a massage. If someone wants a full day of play then it will be charged accordingly. 8 play sessions = 8 appointments so there would be no discount on my consideration. The same with an overnight. If a guest wants 6 hours of solid play at night and then wakes me up at 5am to start over again, it's going to be at the full rate. My multihour rates are very reasonable BECAUSE it's mainly social time... cat