Jabba

Snacks. Gotta have 'em. I like 'em when I'm watching the tube or surfing. Oddly, I do have different snacks when I'm doing the 'puter or TV. Ummm, I'm getting an urge for popcorn. I'm doing the 'puter while watching TV. I like popcorn with a little butter + seasoning. Something with a little parmesan + lemon. I really like Costco Chicago Mix - Popcorn + Caramel...ooooohhhh. Sex in a bowl. I really like the small, hard crunchy shell Easter eggs with a chocolate centre. I like 'em mmmmm....gotta get more. M&Ms they are spawn of the evil dead. Same with the chocolate/peanut butter thingies. They make me want to bungie jump out of my familyroom. I feel sooo good while I crunch down on these sinful little eggs.

Geez, brings back memories. I'm not a fan of football...can't stand the game actually but met a few of the players. Stand-up guys. I remember attending a Grey Cup parade in downtown Ottawa in the mid-60s. Russ Jackson was on a float along with a bunch of other guys. They won the cup that year. Met Tony Gabriel a couple of times in the course of business. Now there was a true gentleman. A fellow who understood PR. Even though I didn't understand or appreciate the game, I wished him luck on a game he was playing that evening & he was very gracious and receptive to well wishes. Met Ian Mofford - Running Back/Wide Receiver. He used to fly out of the flight school I used to work for. Decent fella. Had some nice conversations - not about football.

The Collector - 2009. Disturbing.

Thanks Fishstick. Father's Day is a day of reflection of what it took to make you a Dad. All the care, worries, recitals, sports, driving lessons, piano lessons, singing lessons, swimming lessons, teacher interviews, story telling, book reading, vacations, biking, dog walking, cuddling, conversations, arguments, consoling, prompting, stupid & fun stuff....Dad's are always guilty of something. Kids remember all the weird shit we did to them. It's called damaging your child's upbringing. At the same time, your kid probably remembers your good points - vaguely....maybe. Meh, just gimme a beer & I'll cut the lawn....again. I think I'll hide-out in the garage. Enjoy the day. It won't come again for another year.

6000 posts?? - Good heavens man! Keep 'em coming. Congratulations :icon_biggrin:

In keeping with upholding & supporting future law in Canada, I want to provide law enforcement with an easy & convenient way of identifying Johns & Prostitutes. Johns: They look like your everyday, normal neighbours. They often walk their dogs and wear cardigans and rubber boots. Very sensible clothing. They also sport an unlit tobacco pipe just to make everything seem normal. Their names often start with John, Jack...names that start with "J". They cut the lawn religiously every Wednesday evening and take the garbage out in keeping with the local by-laws. They look like you and me, but they lead a secret life. Prostitutes: These individuals are a different breed. They look like your everyday, normal neighbours. They are often the target of hostile political movements which suit the moment. Sucks eh? Prostitutes also cut the lawn and take out the garbage in keeping with local by-laws. They look like you and me, but they lead a secret life. Hope this helps the Harper government in passing the new laws. Lock your doors everyone.

There are pictures on google of this madman walking around in camouflage & carrying weapons: http://www.google.ca/imgres?imgurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.news1130.com%2Ffiles%2F2014%2F06%2FMonctonshooter.jpg&imgrefurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.news1130.com%2F2014%2F06%2F04%2Fthree-rcmp-officers-killed-in-moncton-shooting-two-injured%2F&h=358&w=588&tbnid=AoeSIKi_mAqhEM%3A&zoom=1&docid=j_vHheS6guYvIM&hl=en&ei=nVeQU7XHFtCHqgbuqYDoDg&tbm=isch&ved=0CCgQMygAMAA&iact=rc&uact=3&dur=491&page=1&start=0&ndsp=15

I thought I read a news report that it was an unrelated incident.

I don't think you have anything to worry about just yet. The bill has to pass through Parliament & then Senate so it's not a done deal. I think the constitutionality of a new bill (especially this one) will be under the microscope. LE probably don't make any investigative moves retroactively prior to new law being enacted. They would be chasing their tails trying to prove criminal activity before something is actually considered a criminal offense. They also have to decide how to enforce new law. Will they use this forum as a tracker tool - they probably already do but so what?.... How many Senators (remember Wilbur Keon?), Ministers, Politicians, Backroom boys are clients themselves? What do you wanna bet those guys are gonna be chewing their nails about keeping their jobs if they pass an unpopular or stupidly draconian bill.

I'd be totally pissed like you. Easy to go overboard. I've got a similar problem with annoyance trespass & pilferage. Almost like a game of cat & mouse here. Consult with a lawyer. If applicable, draft a notarized letter advising the parents of potential liabilities such as reparations for property damage, trespassing, surveillance etc & send it registered mail. Install surveillance devices to track trespassing patterns. Install signage & advise police of your problems. The parents sound like real morons. Good luck!

Naw - apparently, you female folk are incapable of protecting yer own hormones and wet parts. Dang it - I wish there was a church or some other service that could shield females from their own "urges". I want to wish all female ladies of the female persuasion to stop using their female parts to enjoy life because the state says you shouldn't be doing stuff like that. Whatever that is...? Umm - sarcasm going on here....

I'm pretty sure they are two different people. I also saw the lady in your link. Different locations & set-up.

I think I've done Greek a total of about 5-6 times in my pooning career. Tried different techniques. I've researched, thought about, imagined, fantasized...etc, but as you all know, variety is the spice of whatever. Conclusions: Gentle is good Loads of lube is good Protection is good Toys can be good Positions are good (limited experience here) hmmm...what else is good? To be honest, I just don't have a lot of experience to bring to the table. Are there are Greek Goddesses & Gods out there who have wealth of understanding & joy to share? Is Greek an absolute must-do or a mysterious, dark secret reserved only for the true explorer?

Well wishes in your travels Pisaq. I enjoyed your contributions here. You're a class act. J.

Fishfeathers - You're probably already aware of this but Ottawa has "Cruise Night" evenings at various locations. Folks drive their rides from all over and display them at a sectioned-off area of the local shopping plaza parking lot. I used to bring my motorcycle to display 'cuz it was pretty. Attendees were invited to make a donation for various charitable causes so it was a good thing all around. It was a great way to meet some really nice people who had an enthusiasm for cars & motors & grease. Would luv to be able to make it to the Moncton show.

What kind of cars did you have? Did you have to do any restoration work yourself?

I have a buddy who discovered that who he thought were his cousins were in fact his half brothers & sisters. His mom had had kids out of wedlock & were raised by his grandparents. He was in total shock about his mom's previous life. Maybe our ancestors have things to teach us?

Let's see, if you could arrange a current day visit with your long deceased Great, Great, Great, Great Grandparents (given that a generation is about 25 years, which in my case, they could have lived circa 1725-1795)...what could you do to either amaze or outrage their sensibilities? I saw some photographs of one of my grandparent's homestead. Let me tell you it was pretty. frigging. humble! All they had was land, a roof and lots of hard work. Put yourself in their shoes and think of the differences between then and now. The stuff we do to ourselves now is so far removed from their existence back then - how would you help them relate for their day with you? Just one day. Suggestions: Give them a ride in a car? Take them to a movie - maybe a 3D movie? Use the microwave to help cook a meal? Take them to a heritage farm? Take them to church? Take them to a Supermarket? Take them to Home Depot? Turn on the light switch? Turn on the heat or air conditioning? Take them for a walk downtown? Let them surf the internet for porn? Listen to music on the sound system? Let them take a warm shower or bath or hottub? Imagine the look on their faces when they experience our everyday world. We have so much information bombarding us, we simply filter it out, but what about your relatives - how could you help them cope? What kindness would you do for your visitors? On the flip side, they will invite you back into their world for a day. Do you think you could hack it?

Clean the memorial at the cemetery (seems to be a common theme for us older pooners). Take the SO out for a nice brunch buffet. Ironically, our kid won't be able to join us due to work commitments. Chill & work in the garden if it isn't raining. Drink some wine.

I don't want to pontificate. I just remember my teenage years... Music, rebellion, individual expression held a lot of importance to me and my friends. We had the luxury of education & living in our parents' basements. Our parents indulged our crap because they simply were there for us to abuse. We smoked pot, rocked out on loud music, drove their cars into the ground (I don't know why we're still alive). We worked at shitty retail jobs on weekends and earned enough to buy records, dope, egg rolls and stereo equipment. Teenagers are a confused mess of emotions trying to find a path into adulthood - whatever the fuck that is...I'm still an infant. I'm afraid all you can do is enjoy the teenage ride. Ignorance is bliss if you can get away with it.

Might have used water to separate these two idiots. I wonder if the wedding photographer got some good shots?

Turning into an SP is a slippery slope. Oh sure, it's all very innocent and fun at the beginning... First it starts with somebody mentioning the word "sex". Usually in the school yard. Yes people - it can start at a very early age. Then one sees a picture of a naked person. Usually on the Internet. The Internet is an impure hell-hole of impurity. Well ya' see, this is where it really starts going to hell in a handbasket - one starts to have those, ummm - "Thoughts". You know what I'm talking about? "Thoughts". One should really not have any "Thoughts"...it leads to impurity and things like say, Masturbation? Ok, shit!. There, I said it: Masturbation, Masturbation, MASTURBATION!!! Ooohhhhh, fuck! Once a Masturbation happens, everyone in the whole neighbourhood is impure - ick....impurity. Why can't we all just be pure? I like pure. Impurity is impure. But wait folks - it get's worse....much worse. I knew someone who knew someone else who had a friend who overheard a conversation or read an article or something like that on the internet (the internet is always right) that Masturbation leads to SEX and getting promiscuousized and starting a Meth Lab and ultimately leads to being an SP! Lesson learned: Don't have any thoughts, don't look at naked people and for purity's sake, DON'T MASTURBATE! Stop Masturbating! I know you're Masturbating right now. We can all see you. So stopit or else you'll go blind and turn impure. I love how these idiots equate an enterprise to moral turpitude. Remember to use a very WIDE brush to condemn everyone. On a more serious note - were the attending children exposed to violent pictures or depictions at this "Choose Purity" event?

So, let's say you're stuck on a tropical desert island. Just to add a little background ambiance, you were sightseeing on a small fishing vessel. Suddenly, a major sea storm blew in from nowhere and the dang boat sunk. So sorry, no refunds. You, the lone survivor, were washed up on shore during the night. Don't know why you were sightseeing during the night, but what the hell - this is just setting the scene. In the morning, you wake up in a daze, face-down in the sand. Mmmmm...sand. Ptuooeee..spit..spit..spit. You pick the sand crabs off your nipples and other parts (ouch ouch ouch) and stagger to your feet. Your clothes have mysteriously washed away to a bare minimum. Good thing too, cuz it's starting to get pretty hot. Under the brilliant sun, you wander along the beachfront hoping to find a telephone or convenience store. You come across a banged-up brass vase. "Well", you say to yourself, "it ain't a telephone, but it might make a nice souvenir for the coffee table". You're obviously not thinking clearly yet, because there ain't a coffee table in sight! You decide to pause and shine the artifact with the scant remnants of your clothing. With each slow, deliberate stroke the object vibrates and hums with increasing intensity. You linger and stroke and pay very close attention when rubbing the top of the vase. To your amazement, the top pops off and a wonderous, creamy vapour spurts and pours forth. In front of you stands a vision of joyous, incredible beauty. The creature introduces itself with a combination of dignity and sensuality that defies gravity (ok, screwy metaphor). It also gracefully offers a gift of 3 wishes - with restrictions naturally (the creature mentions something about no Greek): Ixnay on wishing for more ishesway Don't try to bring back the dead - they stink ....other than that - you're good to go. Don't forget you're on a desert island, no coffee table, no telephone, no boat, no clothes, no food or water.... What are your 3 wishes master?

Stupid dream. I had a dream where I was in an airplane with Richard Gere. I'm not a fan, but what the hell - that's where dreams go astray. For some reason, Gere decided it would be great fun to jump out of the plane...and the stupid bugger dragged me with out with him. Not a parachute in sight. Boy, was I pissed!! I beat the crap out of him all the way down to the ground. Oddly, I didn't die. I fully expected to bite the big one. There goes the myth if you die in your dream you die in real life. Gere & I had a brief wrestle on the ground and that was it. We didn't do much harm to each other. I woke up both amused and pissed. To this day, I refuse to watch any movie with Gere in a starring role.

http://www.cbc.ca/newsblogs/yourcommunity/2014/04/online-dating-assistants-are-ghostwriting-tindr-profiles.html Personally, I see nothing wrong with this type of service. For those who are literally challenged and short on time it could be a real benefit. Ghost writers are used all the time for authoring autobiographies, resumes, advertizing, etc...why not dating sites? If you're going to dangle bait in the dating ocean, it better be tasty. You want to grab the attention of the right fish. Writers are experts in word-craft, so they know the key words that spark the imagination. What do you think?