Joyful_Jillian

Just an update -- I'm over the initial jitters I was experiencing with the idea of seeing younger gentlemen. Everyone I've seen under 30 and as young as 27 has been fantastic company. I'm changing that policy right away, and deleting some posts about age restrictions. But first, I wanted to say publicly that I'm sorry if I offended any younger guys because it wasn't my intention. ;)

I'm glad this one is cleared up. Is it okay if we kill the thread now? I don't think our antlerman should have to suffer any further indignity. What an awful mix-up.

Fantastic answer Brandi - you're so right, beauty comes from inside when you feel great about yourself. I'm not a natural beauty and didn't always feel so good about myself as I do now either. But I did exactly what Brandi said. Last year I went to MAC cosmetics and they gave me a make-over and showed me how to get started with a very minimal investment, then they showed me how to apply it. I love MAC - their products are long lasting. Amber, it was a step by step process. When you do a small thing you feel better, and it makes you able to take a bigger step. In my case I started to feel better because I looked better, then I started to lose pounds because...I just FELT BETTER about myself and pretty soon I'd lost 45 pounds without even really trying. I bought a pedometer, counted steps, and built up gradually from 10,000 (super-easy) to 100,000 (moderate) steps a day. Walking more doesn't cost a dime and it works. So does belly dancing - I learned to love my middle (sort of) and hips again -- and it's damned sexy feeling too. You can get your groove back girl - I know you can. Get some fashion advice - big girls can look real fine. Like Brandi said, empower yourself to leave this guy in the ashes of your emergence. Be an example to your daughter or she could learn to seek the same kind of man when she's older. If this is the way she is conditioned to associate as "normal", this is the version of "normal" she could repeat if you don't make different choices in men. I thought at first Amber made an odd choice of community to seek out for support. She would probably get the same advice on any board on the internet but I suppose if the man she loves is addicted to seeing SPs, then talking to us could at least put more a human face on her problem. Her man seeing SPs causes her pain but she obviously doesn't view us as the enemy.

It is valuable for prospective clients to have a place to share their service experiences, good and bad, and especially to warn others of "fly by night" operations and poor quality experiences based on the advertising provided. We're not comparing apples and apples when we are talking of reviewing a roofer, etc. and reviewing a service provider. There are technical aspects to services we typically engage in our lives that are clearly right or wrong -- a roofing job, a plumbing job, an automotive repair. When it comes to engaging the services of an SP, it is clearly a subjective opinion at best. A client's expectation may easily exceed his experience, and it could be no fault of the provider. The client's imagination for the experience may have outweighed the provider's ability to meet it. The next client might be over the moon; it could be the best experience he has ever had. Is anyone's opinion invalid in this situation? If the second client happened to be a newbie on this board, posted a glowing review, and the long-time member then posted a negative one, whose opinion would be heard, respected or valued? And what about the SP, who might have delivered the same great level of service to both? Where does she stand in all this? I thought that the review FSS gave Cat was beautiful -- thought so when I read it, still do. I thought it was appropriate and on point. I understand Cat's response. She isn't closed to honest appraisals of her service -- but she doesn't want to be picked apart in public or have every little detail openly discussed. Some gentlemen have the habit of "over-sharing" on the forum. They say some things that are, frankly, quite rude from a lady's perspective. I'm sensitive to the issue from a similar thread to this present discussion in the SPs private area. Guys -- we're talking about very personal private acts, people's bodies, and things we do together which, in all other areas of life, are kept extremely private. Why would any "gentleman" even care to disclose on a public forum such explicit information unless he was bragging? As SPs we don't review you in explicit detail. We don't go off to our private SPs area and discuss your body parts or who you are in the daytime or your jobs or how you perform when you are with us. We're very professional. We talk about whether you're a reliable client, keep your appointments with us or habitually cancel, are easy or difficult to set up appointments with, whether you hassle, stalk, or otherwise exhibit predatory behaviour, and occasionally a comment comes up if someone hasn't washed their willie lately. That's it. All about the business. I don't think any SP has a problem with reviews that are on point and about things that matter. I certainly don't. Just my .02 worth ... love you guys -- love the ability to talk and share. You all rock my world. ;) Darling Cat, hope you don't mind me interjecting this into the flow of praise - I'm just catching up with the thread.

Darling Cat, Your advice is both timely and wise, as usual. The rule is indeed being relaxed and revised on a case-by-case basis. As you have just pointed out, some younger gentlemen with a passion for older women can be very persistent. I've discovered that it's gradually becoming easier to see younger clients, and I've begun to relax my age limit accordingly, in proportion to my comfort level. You are a continual inspiration Cat, Love you, JJ

Adding my thanks for posting these links - very interesting.

It's all good sweetie - you know how I don't like to rush... And yes, Emma is a very special lady. We talk. ;)

Welcome to the message board! I'm a newbie to this board as well. Message boards rock. Our venerable Moderator is very respectful, wise, savvy when it comes to BS, and totally dedicated to the integrity of this industry. I love it here. Oh my goodness, what a timely question and wonderful advice. I love you guys! Learning curve - ya, tell me about it.....I too am newly (back) in the business, new in town, unreviewed, and was asked to give a freebie. I would agree with everyone so far who has said don't do it. There are a few reasons. People can sniff out a "shill" a mile away on this board. From what I've read in different threads, it isn't viewed in a positive light for either the reviewer or the lady. What I've discovered thus far is that offering special introductory pricing is a wonderful idea. So are themed evenings. During the hockey play-offs I have my massage table set up in proximity to the TV and offer "Hockey Night in Heaven" specials for my clients to come over, watch the game while they enjoy their favourite beverage and snacks and I work all the knots and kinks out of their poor stressed-out hides. Most of my clients work way too hard, enjoy hockey, and hey, so do I - it's the playoffs after all...and they seem to enjoy killing two birds with one stone. S'cuse the pun. ;) Swimmer - you're so funny - when I come to Ottawa I really wanna meet you.

Nacho's such a dear - we've been in contact privately. Yes, it's too bad Winnipeg is so far from Halifax. Nacho would have to make a major road trip to take a dip in my salsa! ;) I'm confident there are many fine spicy ladies in Winnipeg for him to errr....sample. Meanwhile, you east coast boys are being very good to me....mmmm....

I'd like to weigh in on this one. Having lived in Europe for awhile (six years) I noticed lots of chicks in my travels who didn't shave anything, including their legs. I always admired how comfortable they were with it all. It's definitely a cultural issue though. Chicks on the continent tended not to shave while the ones in Britain where I lived shaved their legs and pits, but not their pubes. Few chicks I met in England shaved their pubes. I'm a fairly smooth girl anyway, so it's never been much of an issue. I'm one of those who has never needed to shave her legs - EVER. I got my pits waxed a few times years ago, and the hair just never grew back. And I only need to shave my pubes about once a week. The little bit of hair that grows in between times is light and soft - no one ever seems to mind! So here's the answer, for academic purposes: everyone in my circle of friends, male and female, either shaves or trims. So do all of my clients (so far anyway). Here's my viewpoint: Personally, I like a clean landing strip. It's just way more pleasant to deliver pleasure when there are no long hairs or stubble to irritate. As Cat said, it depends a lot on the texture of the hairs. Cat - have you had laser done? Does it hurt (much) ? I'm a wussie about pain. Kisses, JJ

Hey guys, my new ad went up on EC this week - no website yet - sorry, but write for details. http://escorts-canada.com/cgi-bin/frame2?prov=NS&city=Halifax&option=escorts Kisses, JJ

Maybe I should re-think the rule then. I guess my point is that I'd like to meet with gentlemen, not boys. It's astonishing how many enquiries I get from MUCH younger men (i.e. under 25) ... now that would be seriously weird - I have myself kids that age! Nope. Not goin there. I've been talking to Emma this week. Her minimum is 25. So I'm reconsidering....

Ya do it - I have one I'm dying to share.

<perk> Did someone say karoake? Oh you guyyyyyyyyyyyyys!!!!!!! That sounds like so much fun! May? I'm taking some time off after May 13th ... this just might call for a road trip...

I'd like to get some feedback/comments about the availability and demand for mature escorts in Halifax. Since I'm over 45 and fall into that category, it would be helpful to know what the general concensus is on the present providers operating within that demographic in this town. Thanks for your time.

Alexa you said it best - I totally agree; that's the best approach.

Branching topic - attraction and trusting service providers. Chemistry ... are you talking about chemistry or attraction or a little of both? Are you saying that for you ... a pretty face helps create attraction that sparks chemistry? I think everyone is entitled to assess attraction on their own terms - there is, afterall, truly no accounting for taste. None. No need. Everyone is different; what they're looking for is different. If a guy were to say to me, listen Jillian, you're a nice lady but I'm just not attracted to you, now that we're in the same room together ... you know what? I would be so happy they were upfront with me. Otherwise, if they stay and "go through the motions" ... I'm going to feel it. As an intelligent, intuitive woman I'm going to sense it, and that's WORSE than if the guy just walked away. Especially when we're talking about a customer who is paying for an "experience". No one loses face. Believe me, my ego is not so fragile that it's going to be shattered by a prospective customer telling me I'm not his type. Really, let's be mature, it's just business afterall. ;) If attraction and chemistry/spark relates to prettiness -- and, incidentally, there's nothing wrong with that - we are all entitled to our own standards when it comes to attraction ... then my opinion is that you should be offered a series of good (honest) pictures to help you assess whether the lady in question strikes your fancy. I just think that's just fair in the sort of business we're in, where chemistry is related to a quality experience for the client.

... would you care to hear how it goes in Jillian's world? Chemistry is absolutely everything. If there's no chemistry within/after the first five minutes, I would be prepared to call a halt to an appointment -- no charge nor no loss of face on either side. To deliver a good quality experience that both people will enjoy, I feel there has to be not only "click" but "quick click". I make a habit of communicating with new prospective clients in advance, through chat or on the phone. It's usually not hard to figure out. This is such an interesting board - I am loving the points of view! :D So helpful. ;)

Joyful C, I would never wish you to think I've misrepresented myself about anything. Privately we've been discussing legal issues and you've given me valuable guidance. We all know a little bit about a few things - I understand how the authorities work, what the overall legal framework in Canada looks like, who is responsible for enacting laws and by-laws in which areas. I've worked for and around lawyers and within every level of government. Doesn't make me an expert - hope I didn't come off trying to sound like one. I'm still learning new things every day. :)

Dummpy you're so sweet! ;)

Okay, we're digressing - this is a serious topic. Yes, you can catch STDs from kissing or an uncovered blow job. Herpes and oral clap can be transmitted through DFK and BBBJs. You have no way of being certain you're not playing with someone who is a carrier, whether in or outside the SP community. Many of the stories I've been reading about lately on an STD message board were from people who had been infected by their longterm partners, who themselves had no idea they had been exposed to HPV or herpes. The truly sad ones were those who had been virgins and became infected during their first sexual experience. Many more were stories of people who had been lied to by their girl/boyfriends or spouses about their status. Short of wearing dental dams and using condoms for everything, there is virtually no way to eliminate risk these days. Sex is a minefield, no matter who you are looking at having it with.

ROFL! Uh...so sorry to disappoint you. I don't actually have a link for one of those!

There's no good news quad - the only surefire way to eliminate all these risks is to stop having sex with humans and find yourself an extraordinary mechanical fuck-toy. You might find the following link useful. It is a workshop manual that was developed and aimed at streetwalkers and those involved in the sex industry on the west coast (US). I've found it to be an excellent resource on the STD/STI issue. You can probably ignore all the sections where they tell streetwalkers how to be safe! http://www.berkeleyneed.org/resources/tricksmanual.pdf

Good question quad. I don't think you're being paranoid at all. Just trying to assess the risks sensibly and asking good questions. What particular STD or STI are you concerned about that can be passed from one person to another via oral sex or kissing? I'm also interested in knowing whether guys who see SPs are as concerned about STIs and STDs when they see "regular chicks". As professionals we take the time and care to get checked regularly and are careful about protecting our STD/STI status. Remaining clean and healthy is our stock in trade, so to speak. Do you think regular chicks get tested as often as an SP does? What about herpes, which can "vacation" in a person's immune system and become active without many signs? Outside of the SP world, unsuspecting women get "flare-ups" and don't even notice. I'm more anxious about a guy who doesn't screen his "regular dates" or always make it a standard operating procedure to use condoms might pass something nasty along to ME rather than the other way around. I KNOW that I'm careful driver; it's often the other feller I'm worried about! I agree that these days, no matter who you're having sex with, it is ALWAYS best to be safe - however, my antennae are on the lookout for double standards or faulty thinking around these sorts of thorny issues and I just wanted to probe a little more. Feedback?

Thanks so much - that's helpful feed-back. :) I agree, the smell of cigarette smoke to a non-smoker is nauseating. Oh my goodness! The idea of turning up at the door in a cloud of smoke is most unappealing. Did that really happen to you? Oy vay. Did you complain???? If I were a client encountering that sort of reception, frankly I would simply walk the other way. What a terrible first impression! Understandably, however, if you did decide to stay and enjoy certain other "attributes" about the individual, and looked past such, let's call it what it is -- low rent behaviour -- your best alternative was to either "vote with your feet" and not visit the SP again, or post your honest impression during the course of a review, or complain to the agency -- or all three! Helpful Constructive Criticism Gentlemen, it isn't necessary to be mean-spirited or unnecessarily harsh, but if you felt it was a major turn-off, then I think it is important for the lady to hear about it somehow. I'm a REAL big fan of complaining .... in an emotionally mature way. I've found that it produces some amazing results if done properly. I realize this isn't always a "mature-minded" business, however, CERB is a very good and reputable forum that has been around a long time. It appears that your opinions matter. As an SP, I certainly follow threads and take things to heart. You're teaching me! Standards of Service Respecting the rights of the client -- first and foremost -- is where it's at, no matter what business you're in. :) Undesireable behaviour, such as smoking in the presence of a non-smoking client is disrespectful. It quite simply shouldn't be tolerated. It is not the mark of good service in a girl friend experience, unless you happen to like a girlfriend who smokes. :p Expectations either have to be understood by means of service standards, or conveyed as a matter of course when requesting service. In the absence of a "standard" (I'm big on standards) -- then I guess we all should be honest and clearly communicate about expectations. I communicate individually with clients about my nasty habit and the measures I go to so that it isn't a problem for them. The only reason I even raise it in my information package is that for some people who are extremely sensitive and have allergies, which even the most careful preparation will not mitigate, I feel it is only fair. If I had a severe peanut allergy and Dairy Queen didn't tell me there were nuts in my sundae and I had a serious reaction, well...you get the picture. Helping to Raise the Bar As Canadians, I feel that we are often far too polite and afraid to complain when we receive poor service. You can and should be insisting on better standards of service. Gentlemen, it isn't wrong to complain when you're the paying customer. Personal Opinion My feeling is this: if clients will share their honest impressions, in a safe open forum such as this, which is not meant to demean but rather (hopefully) to educate and inform, then together we can create a better industry as a whole, that is service-driven by the customers' wishes and preferences. Last Word If some ladies aren't getting that this is a service-driven industry where best practice counts, they don't deserve your business. Respectfully, Jillian