MightyPen

Has a Russian client ever asked to "invade" your "Crimean peninsula"? How did you respond? Possible responses: a) "Yes, but he assured me he was simply cumming to the aid of his countrymen!" b) "Yes, and soon the navy's port at Sevastopol was full of seamen!" EDIT: c) "Yes, but in truth it was less an invasion, and more of an "uncontested arrival"! (Thanks for the best punchline, U.S. officials!) (etc. etc.) [Right now this seems to me like the very pinnacle of world-aware humour, but it could just be a mood and I may feel differently in the morning. If so, I apologize in advance. ;) ]

Whoops! I'm with ya Summer, and that wasn't me that said that. :)

To be fair to all, I've summarized the questions in this thread as I did for the "ask an Escort" thread. Once again, I've edited some of these down and the originals may contain additional nuances. My intention here is to help resurrect some questions that may have been missed, simply prompt new answers, and avoid duplication going forward. Great thread! 1. What made you finally take the leap? Do you book mostly because ads? Recs? Pictures? or recs or pictures (mostly)? How important is non-CERB web presence? (Cute0aza0Button) 2. Have you ever looked at an ad or profile and thought, "wow, she way out of my league?" (SuiteEscapes) 3. Have you booked a session and not be able to perform as you hoped? If so, how did you handle that? (SuiteEscapes) 4. For married clients, did you ever feel like your hobby was obvious to others at home/work? (SuiteEscapes) 5. For married clients, does a session with an MA/SP leave you happier/better able to deal with issues at home? (SuiteEscapes) 6. In the course of your hobbyist experiences, what has surprised you? What have you learned or discovered? How have those things spilled over into other facets of your life? (AnnaSweets) 7. Have you ever invited a friend into the hobby? (SuiteEscapes) 8. What is the one piece if advice you wish someone had given you when you started hobbying? (Cute0aza0Button) 9. How do you, or would you deal with a Bait & Switch or theft? (SuiteEscapes) 10. Do you ever have fantasies of providers that may not be your typical/usual "type"? Have you ever acted on them? (LexyGrace) 11. How much value do put on what another hobbyist or sp has to say about another provider? Would it impact your decision to see/ or not see her? Do you also base decisions in other aspects of your life the opinions and comments of others? (cristycurves) 12. If the government does criminalize hobbyists, are you going to drop out of the community? What will you want us providers to do to reassure you that it will be safe to come see us? (Summer) 13. Do you form a significant opinion of an SP based on her writing and how she presents herself online? (Nicolette Vaughn) 14. If your favorite companion was to increase in size 15 to lets say 20+ lbs would your attraction change? (cristycurves) 15. What is your favorite thing about hobbying? (Setting up the meeting? The sex? The anticipation?) (kimmyxoxo) 16. What is the thing you hate most about hobbying? (kimmyxoxo) 17. In a session if you "blow" to fast, do you just want to run out right away or do you stay and chat, or massage, enjoy a beverage? (SuiteEscapes) 18. On some providers' profiles you post that you'll be in touch and want to meet. But you don't act on the promise. What's up with that? (cristycurves) 19. Let's say you go see someone for 3rd time, and she is just out of sorts that day. Will you give her the benefit of doubt and try again, or just say..." nah I will look for another"? (SuiteEscapes) 20. When you've seen a lady a few times and have a good connection established, do you feel comfortable talking about or requesting things you'd enjoy trying or do you leave it up to her to either broach or try? Or would you look for someone else who up front states they are into whatever you want to explore and not even mention it to the other? (Midnite-Massage) 21. Should ladies charge for social time? Should I include the option of free meet up before a date when someone books a certain amount of hours? (Amelie) 22. Why precisely do some gentlemen have their profile private? (Raven Rain) 23. WHY don't men a) read websites b) follow direction/instructions c) pre-book more often d) text things other than "hey" e) send out penis pictures? (cristycurves) 24. Why do some men confuse breasts with Charmin toilet tissue and/or loaves of bread? (cristycurves) 25. Hey! Guys! What about #12!? (Summer) 26. When contacting an sp, why do you give up entirely after the first attempt didn't reach her? (fortunateone) 27. For the young hobbyist here, say under 25, have you ever been carded by a SP/MA ? (SuiteEsapes) 28. Is the nature of the incall location important? and why? (Bianca Jaguar)

Phew! For the benefit of others who don't especially want to read through 30 pages to see what questions have been asked, I've done the work and here's the list so far. ;) Some of these are verbatim; others I've edited down to something brief. The originals may contain additional nuances. I thought this might help get some buried or missed questions answered anew, and possibly prevent duplicate questions going forward. This is now one of my favourite threads by the way! 1. Why did you get into escorting in the first place? (Bmoc68 ) 2. What is the best thing about being an SP? (PisaqLove) 3. How do you react when a client says he loves you? (jafo105) 4. What do you like least about being an escort? (Ice4fun) 5. How do you shield yourself from emotional attachments? (curiousm7) 6. Do you ever want to take a client relationship further? (muncher459) 7. How did you feel after y our fist time as an SP? (PisaqLove) 8. After a while seeing the same person, do you prefer not to see that same person and move on? (frank97500) 9. Has it been important to have friends, confidants, mentors in the business? (Winnipegcub) 10. What would you say to a guy that would love to visit an SP but feels very intimidated and doesn't think he is good enough? (frank97500) 11. Have you ever had a "date" that was so hot that it eclipsed your best experience in your civilian life? (PisaqLove) 12. What do SP's do to mentally prepare themselves for a session? (Jay67) 13. Why have I been asked if I was a former male SP? (frenchbrute) 14. What advice would you give a lady just starting out? What's one thing you wish you had known. (Cute0aza0Button) 15. What can a gentlemen do to make an encounter an enjoyable time for both him and her? (roamingguy) 16. How do you deal with a client you don't want to see again? (jg24) 17. If a potential client is interested in knowing if you enjoy/offer a given activity, is there a "best" way to ask? (Brad) 18. Have you even been recognized on the street? (ottawascout) 19. Do your line of work mean that lack health or dental insurance? Have you no income without work? How do you handle this? (Ice4fun) 20. How long do you plan on being an SP/MA/Dancer? (PisaqLove) 21. How do you determine which of your bedroom activities are YMMV? (curiousm7) 22. How are (some of) you able to make a guy feel you truly desire him every time you see him? (nlwoodchuck) 23. Do you all go to sexual skills university? Or are you all just naturally gifted? Does practice truly make perfect or do you need to study and learn specific techniques? Do you have a sexual move or technique that you tend to go with as your finishing move (emiafish) 24. How do I find out what really pleases a lady and what she actually likes or dislikes? How do I find out what I'm doing right, and more importantly, wrong? (qwertyaccount) 25. Have you ever had a bad encounter that made you question your occupation? (PisaqLove) 26. Has a client ever used a heretofore unknown technique that has rocked your world, and if so then can you share it with the rest of us? (emiafish) 27. How do you treat no-shows? (curiousm7) 28. How do you deal with a bad review? (nlwoodchuck) 29. Do you prefer a man's junk shaved or hairy? (defensedave) 30. Have you ever been turned off by a hobbyist look, attitude, and behaviour? And if so, how did you pull through the time with that person? (frank97500) 31. If you offer duos is it because you like them and are a little bi, or is it just part of the job? (Ice4fun) 32. What do you think has made you different that you can sustain a longer career in what can be a very tough business? (OutForFun) 33. How often do you get requests for costumes or roleplaying? (emiafish) 34. What has been the most surprising thing you've learned or done after being an SP? (piano8950) 35. How common is it, after a client leaves, to think "wow, that was someone I could see myself going out to dinner with."? (curiousm7) 36. What makes a pleasant review for you? (Magician) 37. What does it mean when after a session an SP asks "Can I put your number in my phone"? (qwertyaccount) 38. Is assuring a lady that I've just come out of the shower as good as actually taking a shower right there? (Gentleman11) 39. What is your preference in call, out call client hotel. Are client residences out-of-bounds? (Gentleman11) 40. What advice would you give to a client who is a virgin? And If you meet a client who is a virgin, how would you go about relaxing him? (Jay67) 41. For a paid encounter would you be open to going out to dinner or a movie, holding hands, or walking arm in arm? OR do you prefer keeping things completely private? (jafo105) 42. How important are recommendations to a lady's business? (roamingguy) 43. Is it fun when a man cums on your face? Do you have any private pictures with your face covered in cum? (Ice4fun) 44. Why do most ladies ads list all their physical stats (height, age, weight, measurements, eye color, etc.) but others are silent on most or all of this? (qwertyaccount) 45. What types of gifts do you normally receive and what would you like to receive? (Ice4fun) 46. If you show your face in your pictues here, why did you decide to 'out' your face? Did it result in any change? (piano8950) 47. What jobs/careers that guys have do you find turn-ons and turn-offs? (qwertyaccount) 48. Do you have clients that you are more excited to see than others? (PisaqLove) 49. If a client gives you a gift, is cash a good alternative to a gift card? (Luckyme) 50. What's the craziest gift you have received as an SP? (PisaqLove) 51. Do you ever get tired of dealing with people? (frank97500) 52. Have you ever wanted to meet a particular cerb member in person, and get really nervous due to certain perception or expectation you have of them? (Empty83) 53. Is there a kind of sex work you haven't done but would like to try? (dancer, Domme, escort, massage)? If so, why haven't you? 54. What's the strangest outfit/costume you've been asked to wear? (qwertyaccount) 55. What's the weirdest role-play you've been asked to do? (qwertyaccount) 56. Would it be fun to arrive at a date and be confronted with buckets of oysters? No, c'mon, seriously! (LeeRichards) 57. Do certain times of day attract certain type of clientele? Is there a particular time that is more popular? What part of day or night is your preference? (Empty83) 58. If I were to book a 4 hour session with a SP, the first hours being dinner and the next two hours being an incall, what would the rates be? Would I have to pay for a 4 hour incall rate? (Jay67) 59. At what point in a new relationship do you let a guy know your line of work and how do you deal with the worry that he may judge you? (curiousm7) 60. If a new guy in your life tells you he likes to see escorts, what is your reaction? (roamingguy) 61. Is it okay to contact you on days you don't advertise? (Empty83) 62. Do you prefer the first contact be discrete, or straight to the point? (Empty83) 63. Are sincere compliments on appearance acceptable? What such comments are unacceptable? (igab) 64. Are the apt descriptors "prostitue" and "john" inherently shameful? (mrgreen760) 65. Is writing a recommendation the ultimate compliment you can give a lady? (roamingguy) 66. What would be the circumstances of your retirement from this business? (OutForFun) 67. If a regular client and a CERB menber you've never seen both want to book you at the same time, who gets preference? (Luckyme) 68. What is the most memorable thing a client has done for/with you? (PisaqLove) 69. Have you ever had a client do something sweet/kind/nice that it made you cry? (PisaqLove) 70. What questions can I ask to get a sense of how affectionate an SP is likely to be during an encounter? (Rob360) 71. Would you have any issues with your own parner seeing an MA/SP? (JohnnyCanuck) 72. How many times have you fallen for a client? (Daniel Boone) 73 a, b, c, d.... How do I become the ideal kind of client? Do you generally like regulars more or new clients? What's your definition of a regular client? How long a session do you prefer? Is it cool for clients to contact you to say happy birthdays/merry Christmas etc.? How do you feel about a client sending you a brief thank you note after the appointment? If you contact a client between bookings, is that an open invitation to keep in touch between appointments? (A1B2C3D4E5) 74. What are some of the funniest or strangest text messages you've received? (qwertyaccount) 75. If there's something you offer as stated on your ads and/or website does it necessarily mean that you like to offer that service? Or does it only mean that you're able to tolerate it? If it's the later, why offer something you don't particularly like doing? (A1B2C3D4E5) 76. What unwelcome questions do clients commonly ask? (Darr) 77. Is there a good texting format for same evening booking request? (Darr) 78. Would you ever consider going on an all expense paid vacation to some exotic location, with no sex on the table, just as a companion for no other compensation? (gc1968 )

I'm not an SP, and don't meant to break the intent of the thread; but to offer some perspective... just being around a stranger for an extended time is WORK. Imagine the question was "hey, can my friend come live in your house for a week? There'd be no sex, promise! He'd just be around you ALL THE TIME." The locale, food, and shelter are not sufficient compensation for the service he's looking for; and frankly if the lady wanted those things, she could just buy them herself thanks very much. Your buddy is asking for someone to be around him and be a pleasant companion, 24/7. His companionship in a strange place is not as enticing an offer as he thinks. (Plus, he sounds like a bit of a dick and kind of clueless.) He needs to pay the companion to be there and "on the clock" for the duration of the trip.

Thanks for the comments. And huge bonus points to you for the Firefly reference! (Shiny!) But that's probably no surprise, since Jayne Cobb is my avatar. :)

I pretty much agree with you. The stigma comes from the old view of male/female power dynamics, and you're right that despite many advances in many areas of society, this one fiercely resists change. For a very long time in Western society, a woman's value lay entirely and exclusively in her sexual and reproductive powers. There was a long time even in English law when women couldn't own property and had no particular claim on her children; she and they were mere appendages of the husband. (Even today, the father walks his daughter down the aisle in the marriage ceremony and "gives away" the bride-object to her new owner, and how many people really stop to ask "wait, what?"? We're all too busy being caught up in the happy security of a familiar tradition.) When sex is the only measure of your value and using it to secure a husband is your only path to financial security, you do all you can to ensure it retains its value. Women will shame another woman who shares sex freely because she's devaluing the currency in general; and everyone shames, or at least pities, the prostitute for "squandering" her own sole value for the sake of an income when she should be conserving it to secure a husband. And from the man's side you're right; his value was measured by his ability to secure a good wife (and the access to sex and reproduction that entailed). A truly successful man should have a large supply of women throwing themselves at him in the hopes of securing him as a husband. Simply buying sex with money suggested he was incapable of acquiring it through merit. Everyone was supposed to stick to the rules for the sexual "transaction", or the authorities (and their peers) would come down hard to preserve the accepted order. Or at least... everyone should always appear to follow the rules. And that's the rub, because even in such a rigid society prostitutes wouldn't exist without men to secretly be their clients. And plenty of young women, and wives, experienced sexual attraction and acted on it outside of marriage. But when institutions hold sway and individuals are lesser partners in society, you maintain appearances at all costs lest that all-powerful community turn upon you. Essentially: the powers that be, and even the individual participants in a rigid society, won't tolerate others who challenge its rules. The same thing happened to gypsies, who owned no land and therefore were seen as rootless and untrustworthy. People who disregarded the rules of sex=marriage were like sexual gypsies and suffered accordingly. These things all sound silly today, BUT... traditions die hard, even when the reasons they arose don't apply any more. Most people still think that the standard life script -- marry in a church and have kids -- fundamentally rules any successful life, regardless of other changes in society. Parents and other authority figures are happy to reinforce this idea. So you get the dual behaviour of people becoming freer with sex to a point, but still buying into the idea of it as currency to purchase marriage, and that ultimately, sex should reside exclusively within that marriage. Anything else is a threat to all those who still buy into that idea. Still... there's change underway. It's had to wait until the Old Guard largely die off and those that remain becomes outnumbered by a newer generation growing up with different ideas. Just as same-sex marriage has unexpectedly begun to achieve normality, the other anachronisms about marriage and sexuality may give way too. This could be helping to pave the way for acceptance of sexual service providers too. There will always be a conservative rump who will never accept the change, but I think those numbers are changing. We'll see.

I'm sorry she's stuck with such a horrible partner in her contract. But I do really like her solution! Especially if the sugar daddy is married. There's sort of a beautiful symmetry to the relationship. Made me chuckle.

Don't worry; not only did I not watch, I had no idea it was on. In fact, I'd forgotten that hockey was part of the Olympics at all. The only events that usually come to my mind if I think of the winter Olympics are figure skating and skiing, and the ones where a person/people atop different kinds of things slide down hills. :) Oh, well. I hope that team of that country with those people in it had a good time.

I think people have hit on the key difference: the cougar is aggressive in the pursuit of sexual conquest, wheras the MILF is someone not so much seeking but rather admired and sought. But it's all subjective so yeah, you can't really tell what connotations either term will have for people. They'll decide for themselves. Personally speaking, as an attractive "mature provider" you're my preferred class of SP. When I was a kid I was always sort of in awe of the style and allure of women older than I was; and sure, looking back, there were definitely some MILFs! ;) But they were all unattainable, and certainly not interested in me, so "cougars" weren't really on my radar. Still, for some reason that special allure of a woman in her 40s or 50s hasn't changed for me, even though I've reached their age myself. Funny how the mind works.

I've made Big Mistakes that I've later had to forgive myself for. And I'm really, really bad at the actual forgiving part. What I'm better at, though, is being honest with myself about why the thing happened; figuring out (as best I can) exactly what contributions I made to the mistake and why; and then trying hard to correct those things about myself so I won't make the same mistake again. I can settle for that much. I'm not sure the result is really "forgiving". Neither is it forgetting. It's really just trying to learn from the experience and fixing myself for the future. And that all by itself helps me stop obsessing over the event; it knocks it off its pedestal and stops it from defining me. Sometimes those mistakes have involved other people and sometimes those people have been lost from my life as a result of the mistake. Other times I remove them from my life as part of the solution. Other times we find a way, after a while, to pick up what's not broken and agree to move forward and rebuild from there. Depends on the mistake, and the person involved.

Both. Neither. Depends.

Chicken Pot Pie I just made in a new casserole someone gave me for Christmas. If I'd known it was this simple I'd have started making them decades ago! :)

OH MY GOD I am now compelled to date myself terribly. I remember as a kid growing up in the 70s there was a CBC show called "This Is the Law", in which a panel of guests was shown a short (slightly comical) video of a hapless "lawbreaker" (always played by actor Paul Soles) who unwittingly breaks some obscure, unspecified Canadian law and gets arrested. Then the panel had to decide what law he just broke. Some of the laws were pretty weird and some were totally impossible to spot, especially when there was some other more obvious candidate inserted to trick the panelists. Huh! I just searched and found exactly one clip of the show: Funny... the "special guest" in this clip happens to be a younger-than-I-ever-saw-him Donnelly Rhodes, who is better known as the older cop on Da Vinci's Inquest and the doctor in the remake of Battlestar Galactica. Ah, the 70s. I really don't miss you at all.

Yes. Now, that wouldn't prevent me from also condemning him for his actions and requiring that he face the full penalty of the law. I'd kind of like to see happen now. But it does mean that, at the same time, I would understand the circumstances that brought him to that point, and I could see the tragedy in them too. There's another thread that lists the child stars who made it through the experience and came out just fine; and that's brilliant. Some people really can survive early stardom, wealth, power, and the manipulations of opportunists. I don't know why their outcomes are different from others' -- better support network? Simple strength of mind and character? But in Bieber's place, it's clear he's been on top of the world and all the normal impulses to experimentation and edginess from that age are magnified, because there's no shortage of people keen to facilitate his every whim and desire. I think in essence, fame put Bieber into a position that only an extremely strong-willed, well-grounded, well-supported, or simply lucky person could survive unscathed. Looks like he hasn't been that lucky. And so yeah, the tragedy of early wealth and power starts to unfold.

Yeah... like others I'm pretty sick of Justin Bieber the meme/image/celebrity. But I withhold my judgement on Justin Bieber the person. Poor guy got waaay too much fame, money, and (thanks to those) power at too young an age. For most of us, occasionally hitting limits and facing consequences teaches us a healthy degree of humility. Then we grow in character by doing the work required to overcome those limits. Power earned is more often power employed responsibly. But when Justin Bieber hits a limit that somehow didn't bow and scrape out of the way before he even reached it, he can usually just throw some of his money or celebrity at it and it goes away. He never learns. Justin Bieber did earn his fame and money by using his talent (whatever you think of it... it worked). But I can't imagine anyone in their teens being ready to deal with the power and freedom that came with them. Surrounded for years by enablers and fawning sycophants, he's got every reason to think he's the master of every situation he gets into, and all rules will bend to accommodate him. I agree with others who think his arrest is a good thing. Maybe it'll just bounce off him; maybe he'll be contrite for a brief period and then return to who he was a week ago. Or maybe it'll take hold and actually penetrate his celebrity aura, and impact on whatever is left of his original person. Guess we'll see.

Holy shit. I did just check before posting though, and thankfully that's not a real ad, just something someone slapped together on their own computer. Aston Martin has nothing to do with it. And "the photo was taken from the January 2012 issue of Playboy Germany, showing dutch Playmate Rosanne Jongenelen." And no kidding -- that would be the most disgusting ad I've ever seen. I'm cool with innuendo and even evoking the sexual allure of luxury items. But this would have been far beyond the pale. EDIT: On the other hand, I just found that the slogan was used with a less explicit but still same-themed ad. And I even have trouble with this legit one.

I want to give cristycurves a soft little kiss right... there. :) I'd need to travel to 'Scotia-land to do it. :(

I think what you've established there is that, with respect to your relationship, your act IS cheating. But you won't stop for that reason alone, and instead you deal with that by mitigating the risks. As I said before -- that's fine, everyone knows best their own situation, boundaries, and priorities. But "cheating" is by definition a question about one's relationship, and not just one's own point of view. No single member within a relationship can decide by him/herself what does and does not count as cheating on their partner(s); it's something determined by the parameters of a shared relationship, not one solitary individual.

OMIGOD four kilo-posts! Nicely done! Keep up the good work. :)

I agree that avoiding FS shows some attempt to manage the risks of seeing an SP or MA. That said, though, if the question is "is act X cheating?" then the only answer is: what would your significant other say? If she would say it is... then it is. Where the guy's own preferred boundaries fall doesn't really matter when it comes to assessing the potential damage of X to his relationship with another person. Now, having established that, a guy might still have reasons why, despite the act being cheating, he still finds it appropriate for him to go ahead. That's cool. Grown-up lives come in all shapes and sizes, and maybe that decision is right for him in those circumstances. But unless a couple has agreed ahead of time that escort visits are cool, then the guy who says "aw, c'mon, this doesn't really count... right?" is just fooling himself, or trying to avoid taking responsibility for the decision he's really making.

I like to imagine what his partner was doing -- texting back and masturbating while operating a crane?

Yeah, strangely enough I had two colleagues die of heart attacks this year alone -- one while away on a business trip, and one while getting ready to come into work in the morning for a meeting. Both times, in addition to being sad 'n stuff, I thought: wow, their jobs had 'em right to their very last minute. Saddest thing ever. I promised myself I wouldn't go the same way. I'm glad your body gave you a stern warning instead of a final verdict, Curious! Here's to a better 2014 and beyond, and getting the most out of a long life ahead of you.

Hooray! One small step for a court, one giant leap for a system of laws. It's true, the current laws remain in full effect for the coming year, and we don't know what new laws Parliament might pass in the year that's available to it. But at least we won't see a mindless restoration of the laws almost-as-they-were; the court's rationale remains in place to guide whatever is coming. I think at least now there's a fresh conversation to be had in the public square. The ruling by the Supreme Court will create some new awareness of the issues involved, and at the same time its ruling weakens the knee-jerk responses of old that just appealed to shallow conservative tradition. we'll see what 2014 brings. But I'm optimistic for the long-term.