VedaSloan

The best thing to do if you see anyone being slandered or smeared on CL is to simply flag the ad. The more people who flag it, the faster it gets taken down.

Ha, that last one you used (Tell him I'm too fucking busy...or vice versa) was completely awesome.

Personally, I can't stand ads that use words like slut to describe themselves. That's just asking for trouble. Poor spelling and grammar drive me crazy, though I make exceptions where English isn't the individual's first language. But on the whole, I don't tend to read other provider ads. Though, I do check to see what quote Meg has used when I remember. Ha.

Duh, thanks WIT. I completely didn't realize this had already been posted. My bad!

I completely disagree with #4. At least in terms of Ottawa. In my experiences, the police in Ottawa have preferred to work against us, implementing the street crimes unit last year.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/09/10/AR2010091002670.html?hpid=opinionsbox1 I hope that link is correct. It works for me, but sometimes, you never know. I disagree with #4, at least in terms of Ottawa. Didn't realize this was already posted. I'd delete it, but I don't know how.

The Chapin Sisters covering Toxic by Britney Spears Additional Comments: I really liked Patti Smith's cover of Smells Like Teen Spirit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2tv1ShcVmQ&ob=av2n

When you criminalize people, you also dehumanize them. People don't care what happens to so-called "criminals." Just think about all the jokes you hear about being raped in prison. People don't care because they're criminals.

Yes and now the dichotomy between forced vs voluntary prostitution, in cases of trafficking, is being used to imply innocence vs guilty. In many cases, women who are trafficked know they are going to be prostitutes, but they did not expect to be debt-bonded slaves etc. The onus becomes proving the so-called "innocence" of the victim, ie whether or not she knew she was going to be a prostitute, rather than fighting all instances of human rights violations, regardless of "innocence." I just wrote a paper last year about this.

I wasn't trying to be sexist, nor was I trying to offend anyone or downplay the severity of abuse. This thread has certainly given me more to think about and it is hardly a bad thing to learn about your own biases. However, my bias is not related to my being feminist, it is related to my own rape. So let's keep my feminism out of it, shall we?

Again, and I'm really not trying to stir the pot here, but statistics showing the number of women who commit violence against men (and vice versa) are hardly illuminating. It certainly doesn't mention that the majority of violence that women commit against men is retaliatory or in self-defense. Yes, violence against men is a valid issue, but taking statistics point-blank is misleading.

What really pisses me off is that all of this is pushed under the umbrella of "human trafficking" and hello, shit-tons of people are trafficked for lots of things OTHER THAN PROSTITUTION. Not to mention, these people pushing these bills have probably never even met a sex worker, let alone knowing what might be beneficial to us (not that they care). And people wonder why I'm not afraid of my clients. It's policy and lawmakers, academics and others who think they know what is best for me that scare the shit out of me.

She should have at least apologized. I know myself, I turn the ringer off on my cell when I'm in class and have a few times forgotten to turn it back on. Also, my phone does this really irritating thing where it randomly turns off. So if I'm expecting a call, I am checking that thing every few minutes to make sure it didn't shut itself off without me knowing. I think this is a bit of column a (you're being a touch oversensitive) and a bit of column b (she could have apologized). I understand the frustration in taking a whole day and you get your expectations up and it can be incredibly disappointing when your expectations are not met. Lesson learned, I suppose!

I've had the same dream, where all my teeth fall out. But it usually starts as just one or two and then eventually they're all gone. It's so creepy and I always wake up and check my teeth.

Why does no one see the complete ridiculousness of the Swedish model? If prostitution is violence towards the sex worker him/herself, then why is it still okay to sell sex? And since when does it make any sense to criminalize the buyer? The Swedish model went into place without any consultation with sex workers, and in the official Swedish language, they do not make any distinction between forced and voluntary, all prostitution is understood as violence against women. They claim to be the most gender neutral, feminist country, but they did not even consider speaking to the sex workers themselves. The Swedish model is yet another example of policy and law makers deciding what is best for us, and treating us like children. In the first year, police used video cameras to collect evidence and harass clients, which meant they had to film both the exchange of money and the sex itself and many workers felt that even though they weren't doing anything illegal, this was being used to violate their integrity. The street clients become more stressed and want to complete the negotiation process as quickly as possible to avoid getting caught and it becomes difficult to assess if the person is a good client if she is supposed to just jump into the car without any negotiation. Many of the "good" clients have turned to indoor workers to avoid getting caught, leaving the street workers to deal with the clients who don't care about getting caught, usually because they already have a criminal record. Prior to the law criminalizing clients, they could refuse these clients, but now they cannot afford to. It comes as no surprise then that they are exposed to more violence now. The decrease in the number of clients for street workers has made them more desperate and more likely to accept unsafe sex practices. And since the police look for condoms as evidence of sex, this is a strong incentive not to carry condoms. So basically, the Swedish model sucks and only forces prostitution further underground. Give your head a shake lady (Joy Smith), you don't know what the fuck you're talking about.

No idea why, but as a child I was irrationally terrified of tornadoes and every time there was a thunderstorm, I'd pack my favourite things into a garbage bag in case I had to make a quick run for the basement. And I've always been terrified of spiders. I have this irrational fear that they're going to leap into my face. Probably because when I was three I ran into a web of freshly hatched babies and they were all over me. Just thinking about it gives me the heebie-jeebies.

I am sorry for what happened to you. And my sincere apologies if I have offended you. That was not my intent. I am curious to see where you have gotten your stats, if you care to share them.

I didn't arbitrarily blame all men for the fault of some, I merely made the point that is still men who commit the overwhelming majority of violence. And nowhere did I say "all men are shit." Please don't put words in my mouth. My point was also not to deny the fact that some women commit violence and mental abuse toward men, but that many of the posts in this thread seemed to generalize women as unable to communicate in healthy ways, as always being verbally abusive. And that I disagree with.

Violence refers to physical abuse. Perhaps if the thread was entitled "Psychological abuse against men is real" I'd be more inclined to agree. Throwing out details from the past 30 years is a result of poor communication and bad argument skills, not a specifically "woman" thing. So please, don't generalize to all women, ANYONE can be that ignorant.

I love how the assumption is that violence against men is committed by women. Actually, women committing violence against men is a very very small percentage, when in fact, MEN still commit the majority of violence, against other men, and against women. I'm not trying to say that women are blameless or that they don't do horrible things from time to time. What I'm saying is that the focus and onus should still be on men. You know what really pisses me off though? Prison rape and the fact that it is expected and joked about. Roughly 300,000 inmates (this is a US statistic) are sexually abused every year, by both other inmates and guards. That is unacceptable.

Couchsurfing is really the only way to travel if you ask me. http://www.couchsurfing.org That's what I did when I went to Europe and not only was it super cheap (you don't pay for accommodations and most of the time the people you stay with feed you too), but I met A TON of really awesome people.

Hahaha, LOVE IT. This takes me back.

I watched the movie when I got back and I was staying in one of the houses across the street from the park where Colin Farrell is going to kill himself. I walked through that park every day. I also killed myself laughing at the bit where the give the American tourists crap before they go up the Tower. That thing is a climb and a half.

rebellious!

From about twelve until grade eleven or twelve, I was convinced I was going to be a forensic pathologist. What can I say, I was a weird kid who kept to herself a lot. Then I decided I was going to be an archaeologist. And I went to university do a double major in archaeology and classics. Then in the middle of that degree, I semi-returned to forensics and was going to study forensic anthropology. However, it was at Wilfrid Laurier that I discovered the Women's Centre and my passion for feminism. I started volunteering for the centre, answering the phones and watching the library. Then I moved to Ottawa and started escorting and decided I was going to go back to school and study what I was really passionate about. So now my plan is to go to graduate school and combine both of my degrees and study sex and gender in pre-literate societies with the eventual goal to become a professor and teach somewhere.