SamanthaEvans

Oh, I think that thing will end up next to the spray-on hair, Lee. I mean, really, it has no elasticity! It's not going to stay on anyone who tries to wear it. And animal print fabric? Pleeeze.... :icon_rolleyes: I could send a box of our prototypes to the FatBastardsBBM site and maybe we could get a photographer to do a shoot of the boys in their natural setting, wearing our product. What do you think? By all means, let's get together and see what we cum up with!

I have known two straight male escorts. They certainly had everything that would fit the bill: they were good looking; highly educated; able to talk to anyone about anything, anytime; they had impeccable manners; and they were adept at fading into the background at the drop of a cocktail napkin. A fine wardrobe of beautifully-tailored suits completed the package. The one I knew in Toronto was having a very hard time earning much of anything despite his strong resemblance to Pierce Brosnan. He said he had occasional dates with middle-aged and older women who needed a companion for an evening, usually for a public event or a party. He might earn $100-200 for four or five hours. He contacted me because he was hoping I might have some ideas or that I might need a companion of my own occasionally. I had very few suggestions and no need of company, though. About four years ago, I had a meeting with a man here in Vancouver who was also looking for a way to improve his business. A little bit more rugged looking than the fellow in Toronto, he was very attractive in addition to being a world-class skier. I think he would surely have been able to make a part-time income, but he was having little success. Like the man in Toronto, he said he might have a date every 4-6 weeks for an evening including dinner, an opening or other event and, as he put it, "tucking the lady into bed" later. I ran into him at a charity event one evening. He looked fantastic and was as charming and debonair as humanly possible. For essentially the same evening--drinks, dinner, the charity program and some private time--he earned $250; I earned $1500. He finally gave up on escorting and became a ski instructor for middle-aged people who'd never learned to ski before. If there are women interested in straight male escorts, where do they find out about them? What other kinds of supports are there for the idea that this might be something they should consider? For example, if women's magazines were to occasionally mention this option or feature it as a focus article, that might make a difference, but those publications tend to be very conventional in their attitudes and approach. I know almost nothing about gay male escorts, but my impression is that even they have a hard time making a living in our profession. Some are more successful with sugar daddy arrangements than with conventional advertising and agencies, but I think it would be rare for many of them to earn anything comparable to many female escorts' income.

The sun has come back to Vancouver . . . but we're trying not to make a big fuss about it. The sun is very shy and when overwhelmed with praise it tends to run away and hide.

In early January, a prospective client said that he wanted to meet me in a hotel bar. He would try to pick me up and I would steer the conversation to get him to understand that he couldn't have my time for free. He wanted to ask what an hour with me would cost and have me name my price. I told him that this is illegal and that I wouldn't do it. Moreover, I hadn't met him in person, didn't know what he looked like and therefore wouldn't take part in any role-play with him in public, even if the topic was a legal one. He tried to dissemble, saying that he was just testing me to see if I knew the limits of the law and whether I was the kind of woman who takes such risks. He said that some SPs will push the boundaries if they're paid enough. In his first e-mail to me, he'd piled on the compliments, saying how well-respected I am and how much he's appreciated my posts here, etc. If he really did know these things, he would have no reason to expect that testing me would serve any good purpose. I decided that he was up to no good. He was either wasting my time or running some agenda of his own that wasn't likely to be favourable to me.

RG, as you know, I've had no problem at all accepting these things from you as part of the screening process. You're providing good, verifiable information that assures me that you are who you say you are, and that helps me feel confident that I would be safe in your company. I don't require work telephone numbers from everyone who wants to see me. Indeed, I've probably asked less than a quarter of my new clients in the last couple of years to give me that information. When someone has a reasonable objection to providing a piece of information, there are usually other ways to satisfy my need. No work phone number, but two good references from companions he's seen within the last six months would be one example. Ultimately, I draw a sharp distinction between protecting someone's privacy and ensuring their complete anonymity and untraceability. I have a number of clients from the US. In every case, the first time they've contacted me they've provided complete disclosure of their identities and verifiable contact information along with good, recent references. This is standard in the US where clients and companions both need to take steps to ensure that they're not being set up by law enforcement. Here, in Canada, LE is much less an issue; safety is a greater one.

Odd calls are often a sign that university students' term has ended and they don't have enough constructive things to do.....

Many apartment buildings give residents the option to see whoever is using the enterphone--connected by video to their television--before they let them into the building. I've long been advised to do something similar with a discretely-hidden video camera outside my door. I haven't felt a need to do this, but when the Google glasses become widely used, I will probably take this advice and not allow anyone I don't know to come into my place if they're wearing glasses.

Be still, my pounding heart! I would never have doubted your fantasticness in bed, but you cook? And do housework, too? There is a God in Heaven! And he or she has prodded you to nudge me to avoid stereotypes--mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. (Sorry about the foot rubs, though. I don't like my feet to be handled!)

Wow... OD, you're outdoing yourself, here. I'm breathless, quivering with anticipation as I imagine the timeless questions women have that could be answered at long last. Like... for awhile, I dated a nuclear physicist, gifted beyond belief when it came to that kind of Math that doesn't use any numbers, just a lot of brackets and Greek symbols. You know, that one. The man is a certified genius. Good in bed, too. But could he remember when my birthday is? No! Sadly, he's not the first man I've known who couldn't keep track of something simple like that. Maybe it would be better if I dated accountants and actuaries, but, well, then I'd be dating accountants and actuaries and, really, dear friend, can you imagine me with one of them? Of course not. So, back to my original question: What is the problem with remembering birthdays? And what is it about hockey games? I mean, really. I've been looking forward to a pleasant rendez-vous with a very nice fellow in the late afternoon today. This morning, he called to say he thinks he's coming down with something. He wanted to postpone the meeting. Okay. I hang up the phone and turn the page of the newspaper to discover that some hockey team called the Senators is playing against the Penguins, today. Apparently this is the highly challenging Game 4. And the Senators only saved their asses-on-skates Sunday night by means of divine intervention or something, winning over the flightless waterfowl in the final heartbeats of the game. Is there a connection between the cancelled date and the game? That's not even debatable. Now, if I do say so myself, I'm a heck of a lot prettier than any of the Senators and I swear I have no Penguin-type fish-breath, and there's never a question about whether my guest will feel like a winner by the end of the encounter. So, what gives? Sign me Perplexed.

I can't recommend anyone, but I do advise you to be extremely cautious with this kind of play. The stimulation can be powerful, but it's also dangerous if carried out incorrectly. If you can't find someone who does this, you might check with the BDSM community in Ottawa and/or on FetLife. You may be able to find a Dominatrix who offers this or a male Dominant who would be willing to help you.

I'm not ashamed of what I do: I'm very self-protective. Some of the people who are most important to me would not understand my choices nor would they believe what I might say about my experiences in this profession. I can live with them not knowing the truth about how I make my living. I would have a very hard time dealing with their judgment and probable rejection. There is no need for them to know about my work. I'm sure there are things I don't know about them, too. If my daughter, my sister or a friend said that she wanted to become a paid companion, we would be having a lot of long talks after that! Because, no matter what some of us may say, after a decade in this business I know that the number of women who decide to become prostitutes because they've made a careful career plan is extremely tiny, like hen's teeth and clam feathers. I often hear from women who are considering joining our profession and who want some advice. I always ask them what has happened in their lives, what has brought them to the point where they're able to consider doing this. As Cat says, "little girls don't say they want to be prostitutes when they grow up." Usually, something happens and the woman finds that she has a sudden, inescapable need to make a considerable amount of money very quickly in order to avoid dire consequences like losing her children; being unable to care for an aging, ill parent; being unable to provide for herself while she deals with a serious illness like multiple sclerosis, lupus, fibromyalgia, rheumatoid arthritis, chronic fatigue syndrome and a host of others that may make ordinary work impossible; or maybe she needs to move away from an abusive spouse or partner but has essentially no job skills or time to develop them. There are many, many reasons why women become prostitutes and nearly all the time they're sad, hard ones. So, if someone I know told me she was considering becoming a paid companion, I would want to know a lot about what's really happening in her life. Maybe there's another way to get the help she needs and, if there is, I would want to ensure that it happens. You say, That's true, if the companion is actually able to do the work. The thing is, this is a terrible profession for the great majority of women who consider it and who try it for a while. In our society, even women who enjoy sex a lot and have good self-images are not usually prepared to have sex with a large number of men over a short period of time. Women are socialized to be emotional, to value intimacy in particular ways and generally to have few intimate partners. It's not easy to go from these conventional beliefs to being on intimate terms with many men you will never really know and may never see again. Add to that, if the woman is young, much of her clientele may be men old enough to be her father or grandfather, which can raise conflicting feelings and concerns for her. Most of the women who contact me are hoping that they will quickly be able to work the way I do, seeing very few clients. They're usually surprised by the amount of time, energy and hard work that it takes to build up a cadre of regulars: it can take years. In the meantime, she may need to see many, many more clients per week or month than she imagines. The urgent need to make money because of a life-crisis does not improve anyone's judgment. New companions always make mistakes. Those of us who have been working for a long time make mistakes, too, though generally different ones. But at the beginning, she has to learn how to screen clients and how to maintain her privacy and safety. Most of the time, she'll start out charging too little for her time which, unfortunately, means that she's far more likely to be preyed upon by unscrupulous clients who may be very hard on her, not treat her well, manipulate her and try to cheat her while demanding an extraordinary amount from her. This is emotionally, psychologically and physically exhausting, at best. For women who are real survivors, determined to take charge of their lives, to pull themselves out of whatever has happened to them, if they can keep their heads on straight, working in this industry can be a life-saver. Most companions don't last six months in our profession: it's not the right thing for them. The ones who do stay on usually have found a way to carve out their own niche, establish their own brand or style, and develop their business model with great care. We do well because we work damned hard. I know I put in many, many more hours on the computer and the telephone than I do in bed, even when every man I see that month is a returning guest, not a new client. Being a paid companion has been good for me. It has enhanced my self-esteem and made me much more confident in all areas of my life. I have learned things that I would not have learned any other way and developed skills and strengths I didn't know I had. I have never, ever been exploited by anyone. I was able to take a bad situation and turn it around. I wouldn't have been able to do that with an ordinary job. I've done fairly well because of a combination of luck, hard work and patience. Others will have different experiences and outcomes. Some will have more success than I have had so far. Many others will fare less well because they're simply not suited to what this work demands of them. This is all my way of saying that if a friend or family member told me that she wanted to join my profession, I would try to find other ways to deal with the crisis that has brought her to the brink of making this decision. Once someone has become one of us, I will do my utmost to help her learn what she needs to know about everything required to keep her safe and healthy.

Hmmm.... well, they've done at least one duo, right? So, I'm thinking.... surely we could arrange for a full-out orgy. That way, there's less haggling about who, what and with-whom. Thoughts?

Dear Dog, It's taken me quite awhile to make this, having a small kitchen and only one frying pan, but after buying up all the bacon I could find in the grocery store today, I kept at it because you're so special. I tried not to include too many veggies, which won't make your cardiologist happy, but he's not a client of mine, yet. Here, for you, for Queen Vicky's weekend:

Unfortunately, it takes seven provinces that also have 50% of the population to make a constitutional amendment to abolish the Senate. That's not going to happen. Creating an elected Senate isn't a solution, either. We'd end up with the kinds of problems the US has with a Senate and a House that don't necessarily agree about things. I think that all we can do is ensure that Senators are required to follow every minute detail of the rules. If they don't, they should be turfed out, summarily, with no returns possible. So ironic to have all of this going on with a PM who was once upon a time such a staunch advocate of Senate reform!

My sincere condolences to all those who have migraines. I used to get them, and they were murderous things. I'd see halos around lights and everything looked hyper-intense in colouring and detail--like when the ozone is really high in the air, right before a rain storm--for about half an hour or so and then the pain would arrive. If I was fortunate, I could get home in time to take some heavy meds and go to sleep. If not... oh, God. I can still remember hearing a fly stamping his jackboots on the ceiling while I lay naked on the bed unable to tolerate the feel of a sheet on top of me. It was the worst thing in the world. Fortunately, my migraines went away when I was pregnant with my first child and I haven't had one since then. I guess, for me, they were hormonal. Others aren't so lucky! I wish I could help.

Yup, I do know about that pub, Meaghan, thanks! A couple of years ago, they ran out of glasses by early September, the mosquitoes had died off and winter was about to arrive. The economical option was to board up the pub until spring. I'm not sure whether they remembered to wrap the pipes, but they're handy fellows. Sometimes. ;-) Maybe you'd like to join Katherine and me this fall? Well, Lee, I was imagining something a little more up-scale, you know. I don't get out much, see? I like to treat myself when I'm out of town. I'm sure we'll work something out. I've got a busy summer planned, so I'm sure I'll be able to afford an extra beer, maybe two!

Katherine, please let me know of your plans in advance. I'd like to join you there, if possible. That is, assuming the guys make it through the summer well enough to be able to handle visitors from both coasts at the same time. Hibernation season begins early, after all! Whatever happens, I'm sure that you and I can find a pub nearby where we can entertain ourselves and each other.

With respect, here's how it looks to me. The first time you see a lady, you steal time that she hadn't agreed to spend with you. If she doesn't know how to assert herself, she's probably inexperienced and has little or no support for maintaining her boundaries. If she pretends to be an enthusiastic playmate, you book another meeting. She agrees to see you because she doesn't know better. You still run overtime. If the time creates problems for her, it doesn't matter because you paid more, this time. Since you didn't compensate her for stealing time at the first meeting, you have a net savings for the total time. You feel like a winner because you've imposed on someone by ignoring your time agreement and essentially forcing her to appear to enjoy doing what you want, whether she likes it or not, while paying less than you should. Based on many years of experience, it's my professional opinion that men who behave in this way are a danger to inexperienced companions because they prey upon their fears and uncertainties, demonstrating a deplorable lack of respect for the women and the intimate care they receive. Such men are not really interested in a fun and playful erotic romp with a lovely lady. They want to exert power over women who aren't able to refuse them. My consistent advice to new, inexperienced paid companions is to establish clear boundaries and not to allow those limits to be violated. Once given an inch, some men will not settle for less than an entire continent. I tell these ladies never to fear that they won't get enough business: there's plenty to go around. Tolerating abuse often encourages abusers to continue to be abusive.

I really appreciate this good discussion, Charlotte. More than guys who want to haggle over prices, arrive early, try to stay late or, after they've arrived at the meeting place, pressure us for things we hadn't agreed to do, basic hygiene is the number one thing companions complain about. The guys who refuse to shower, the ones who shower but somehow don't get cleaner, the ones who seem oblivious to fecal matter clinging to their bodies are very challenging and sometimes impossible for us to engage with as well as we want to. A little over a year ago, a prospective client scheduled a lunch meeting with me. He wanted to get to know me before booking intimate time with me. Lunch was great. He had a sparkling personality and a great sense of humour. We talked and laughed, complained about politics, moaned about the endless Vancouver rain, told stories and otherwise quickly developed a very good rapport. When we left the restaurant, he walked me to my car. I offered a hug and he happily embraced me. That's when I smelled the strong cigarette smoke clinging to his clothes. I gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek. I could taste cigarettes on his skin. I didn't want to ruin the date, so I didn't say anything. I'm particularly sensitive to cigarette smoke. Heavy smokers often don't realize that the smoke and chemicals are absorbed by their whole bodies and exude from their skin. Without being too gross about it, the aroma is particularly pungent where there are major concentrations of sweat glands--that is, under the arms and in the groin. When he contacted me the next day to arrange a meeting time, I asked him about how much he smoked. He admitted that he smoked about three to three and a half packs a day. He was bashful about it, knowing how bad this was for his health. I had to tell him that I wouldn't be able to tolerate the smoke that oozes from a heavy smoker's pores. It's not a little thing, for me. I've tried to ignore it, but I can't: I quickly feel very ill, and a simple hot shower doesn't take care of it. I was very sorry to lose what I was sure would have been a great engagement with this very charming, personable fellow. He wrote to me a couple of weeks later, asking for another chance. He said that he'd taken steps to remedy the problem and that his wife was happy with the results so far. He wanted to meet me and, if the smoke was still a problem, that would be that. No hard feelings, no harm done. We could enjoy some social time together instead. I agreed to see him a week later. In the interval, he went to his health club and had a long sauna, followed by a deep tissue massage from the club's expert male masseuse. He did that twice that week, including the day before our meeting. The difference was incredible! He still smoked. He said he was trying hard to cut back. I could still detect a bit of smoke on his jacket. He took a shower before joining me in bed and everything was fine. He's become a very good, regular client. He sees me about once a month. He's continued with the sauna-and-massage routine. He's cut back his smoking to less than a pack a day and soon expects to give it up completely. He's feeling much healthier. I'm not the reason he's cut back on smoking, but I may have contributed to it. Whatever is true, he makes his own choices about such things. But I have truly appreciated being taken seriously.

This is a risk we all take. Much as we work hard to maintain good boundaries and keep expectations in line, human beings are human beings. Everyone wants to be loved. As a species, we don't do very well when we're alone too much. Sometimes these things work out, but that's very, very rare. You might consider taking a bit of time to reflect on your own life and what you really need. We all have aspects of ourselves and places in our lives that aren't quite what we think they are. A super-independent person may not recognize their need for close, intimate companionship, for example. You didn't say anything about your own life, and there's no reason why you should, but if you're married, perhaps there's more missing from your relationship than you'd thought. If you're single, maybe you need more connection than you'd been prepared to recognize. Think about other relationships in your life, too. How are things going with your friends and family members? Have there been major changes recently, such as the death of a parent, the loss of a friend or co-worker? And how is your health? Are you working too hard, too many hours or at something you no longer enjoy? Or are you in a time where you just don't feel like anyone knows you very well? Being lonely is not a trivial matter at all. It's a real life-issue that we rarely talk about, but is important to work on. My point in all of this is to say that if there are things in your life that you're missing, or that you've lost, or maybe never found before now, perhaps if you do some work on those, you'll find what you really need from someone who is in a position to really and completely be with you. I wish you all the best.

I think the mice have gotten into the wiring under the floorboards, here.... Word documents always insert a lot of hidden bumph into text. What happens if you format your ad copy in Notepad?

I always appreciate knowing that I'm not losing my mind, just yet! I also have the super-wide widths on some posts, but not all. Mice may have gotten into the site code....

I'm not sure if this has happened just to me or whether others are experiencing it, too, but tonight, when I logged in, going, as always, to my User CP, the "New Subscribed Threads" sort displayed 73 different topics, going all the way back to February 14. I was here this morning without such a massive list loading. I'd read all of those threads when their lasts posts appeared. Out of the 73 threads, only 6 had had changes since I was last in Cerb. Strange!

Dear one.... Are you saying that you book 30-minute meetings and then always go overtime, getting that extra 50% for free, and that you're proud of it? Has it occurred to you that these ladies may not feel that they're able to tell you to leave or to ask you to pay for the additional time? Surely you're not advising others to engage in such exploitation. That's not how gentlemen behave.

FB thinks I should consider buying a new, fuel-economical Nissan which I can finance it at 0% for 84 months. When I practice Alchemy for Success, Alienware will also help me switch cell phone companies, remember to drink more water and vote NDP on Tuesday (BC Provincial election day).