SamanthaEvans

Shortcake, I totally agree! My experience is that the ones who have a very definite outline and detailed expectations are setting us up for failure. What actually happens is unlikely to follow his fantasy to a T because we're human beings, not actors following a script. I try to encourage my visitors to relax and let things flow in their own way, as they will. I'm quite happy to say that I do or do not offer certain things, but I won't ever guarantee anything. There are too many variables that may make something a poor choice for that particular meeting, though it might be very different another time. That said, I do a fair amount of role playing. I find it works best with clients I've seen before, though. And then all we really need is a set-up: He's the interrogator, I'm the spy they've captured recently... or whatever!

Awwwww! That's adorable!

The idea of a client information sheet seems like a good one, at first, but in many ways isn't as workable as one might think, at least in my experience. When someone contacts me, I send a detailed letter about my services and restrictions. I ask to know some things about them, too. Some prospective clients reply with valuable information, but many do not. I've found that those who say little aren't holding back so much as they're often open to going with the flow, so to speak, and discovering the chemistry that may occur between us. The quality of the interaction is based on many subtle things that can't be confined to particular acts or accessories. It's got a lot to do with personal style, rapport, a shared sense of humour and a willingness to be open and vulnerable that can't be forced or faked. That said, I aim for extended meetings so that there's time to create a basis for intimate play. I offer experiences rather than services; I only make same day or half-hour appointments with established clients who may find that they want to experience something brief and intense. Not everyone works the same way, and what I offer isn't what everyone is looking for, either. We're all different! However, knowing what the prospective client is interested in isn't my first consideration. Screening is about safety. If I'm sure that I'm safe and that I'll be treated well, I can address the man's interests. If I don't think we'll be compatible, nothing else matters. While I'm willing to play hard, the first meeting with someone new is more exploratory than kinky. If we have a mutual rapport, then I ask for detailed information about needs, fantasies and fetishes.

Thank you, friends. Z is a complex man, in all of the finest ways. He's been seeing me for about three years, so there's a lot of history mixed into our interaction. While I frequently feel unnerved and rarely know what to expect, he's always treated me well. The edgy and dark aspects of our play have been very good for me. I don't write about this kind of thing very often, but I'm glad you've enjoyed reading this account.

In a good way, I hope! :lol:

LOL I can imagine a new advertising campaign.....

It's been a very long time since I posted a story, here. It feels like it's time. My client has given me permission to share this one, in full. It's too long for this board. You can read it on my website. Mute

I completely agree. My clients know that their identities are sacrosanct with me as long as my safety isn't compromised. One of the biggest reasons that our business thrives is that we maintain this kind of confidentiality!

My clients are mostly men over the age of 50. I have a few regulars who are in their 70s, in terrific health and still going strong in every way. :bigclap: Honestly, they're terrific lovers. They're happy to take their time and are very giving, erotically. One, in particular, seems almost to turn me inside out whenever we meet. He's fabulous at the psychological side of things in ways that enhance the physical beyond description, for me. Take care of your health, gentlemen. Stop smoking. Get plenty of regular, aerobic exercise, lose those 20 pounds you've been complaining about for years, eat a good, healthy diet, get plenty of sleep and avoid unnecessary stress. You'll be so glad that you did. You'll live a longer, healthier, sexier life!

I only offer last-minute appointments to established clients. I'm often booked for two or three weeks ahead and I have some clients whom I see on a very regular basis, like the second Monday of the month. If someone needs to cancel or change a meeting, I may be available for a same-day appointment with someone else, but this doesn't happen very often. Most of my clients see me for longer appointments, in any case. I'll always go out of my way to make arrangements for someone I've seen before, but new clients aren't going to get the same benefits.

Some people give such mixed messages at times that it's very hard to know what to do. In early December, a new client checked with me several times about what my GFE included. He wanted to be very sure that I was open to kissing, cuddling and all of that. I met him at his hotel. He seemed very pleased to see me. We got along very well, chatting and so on for about 10 minutes. But every time I touched him, he didn't respond. Every non-verbal message I got from him was that he didn't want to go through with the date. I finally asked him if he was comfortable, and he said he was, telling me how lovely I am, etc. But he did nothing when I was straddling his lap and unbuttoning his shirt. Nothing when I moved to kneel on the floor and unbuckle his belt, etc. He smiled and stayed almost stone still. It was extremely frustrating for me to get no feedback. I suggested we go to bed, and even there, he just lay still. He got hard and stayed that way. I got on top of him.... It seemed like a test, whether of himself or of me, I'm still uncertain. When I left, he was warm, friendly, said he wanted to see me again in the spring, and he tucked $50 into my coat pocket. I was stymied. A tip, for what? He got off, but I felt rejected the whole time and that's not something I need to go through. I have had men visit me who didn't want to have to spend much time or attention on what might give me pleasure. I think that one of the reasons they wanted to see an escort was that they don't have to pay attention to what we might like. They've paid for my time and everything else is solely for their benefit. Okay. I can understand that. I don't need to feel sexually fulfilled every time. However, I don't enjoy these encounters and I don't encourage the clients to return to see me again. I usually struggle with blaming myself for these encounters. I'm a strong woman. I'm pretty forthright and assertive. But I'm not naturally dominant in bed. I can take charge, but my preference is to be an equal, including a submissive equal. If the person really seemed nervous or inexperienced, I could work with that. But when they just seem detached and disassociated, that's something very different to me.

Aww... that's serious bragging! :biggrin:

That is adorable! Thanks for sharing it.

I think there's a profound contradiction in our society when we decry pedophilia but also sexualize female children, dressing them provocatively and encouraging them to become obsessed with their physical appearance rather than their physical health and well-being. I dressed my daughter in the same things my sons wore: baggy, comfortable slacks and jeans, over-sized t-shirts and sweatshirts with no advertising, no ballerina dinosaurs, skulls or motorcycles. They wore bright, clear colours that they liked. They could move around, run, jump, climb things and be active without worrying about their clothes, or about whether it was okay to clamber about on playground equipment. I'd seen too many girl children who wouldn't climb on play structures because they were wearing frilly miniskirts and were worried that their underwear would show. My daughter had some beautiful dresses, too. She wore them to some family birthdays, Christmas parties, concerts and so on. She loved to dress up, but she also loved to wear play clothes most of the time. She wasn't interested in wearing makeup until she was about 16, when she had her ears pierced. I felt that she should develop her mind and feel physically strong so that she could be independent. Focusing on external beauty, clothes and makeup to attract men undermines girls and young teens, and that seemed very wrong to me.

The discussion of semantics and legal definitions doesn't really address lowdark's original point. He wasn't talking about the use of "whore" from a civil or human rights standpoint, or whether it was legal to use the word. He was objecting to its use to describe women in places like CERB. He thinks that the word debases and degrades women and shouldn't be used as a matter of courtesy, or gentlemanly etiquette. Fair enough. The question is not whether it's legal to call someone a whore (whether she exchanges sex for money or not). It's what kind of language does a gentleman use to refer to the women in his life, whether they are sex workers or not. Language has enormous power. It can wound and maim. Sometimes it kills. Most often, though, the words we use say more about us, as users, than about the people, places and things we describe. A man who refuses to describe me as a whore has a higher standing with me than one who doesn't. Why, I turned down a meeting with someone just last week because I knew we weren't compatible. He responded in e-mail, saying that I'm just an over-priced, trumped-up whore. I took that as confirmation that we wouldn't get along well in person. I don't consider it something to be worth debating, however. Context is everything.

The word "whore" doesn't bother me as long as I'm the one using it to describe myself. But I agree that some men use it as a put-down when they apply it to a woman. However, I don't entertain such men! :icon_wink: Language that has texture and contrast is meaningful and stimulating. I've noticed that, at the right moment, referring to myself as a whore often has a significant effect on my companion. That's worth a great deal to me. And urging him to fuck my c**t at the right time usually ratchets up the heat and intensity quite a bit!

And if you're living in Vancouver, try not to remind your friends in other parts of the country that we only have to shovel the worst of our weather every three or four years.....

Good for you, Sarah! Knowing what's right for you is what matters most. I wish you all the best in the time to come. Happy monogamy is possible. You'll find it! Good luck with your new company, too!

This is a good question, Rob. It will be interesting to see what others have to say. In my experience, having worked in Toronto for a few years, and here in Vancouver for a few more, I'd say that differences are minimal, overall. The market is much more competitive in Toronto, which I attribute to the larger population. Here, in B.C., there aren't as many mature companions as there were when I was in Ontario. I can charge higher rates in Vancouver than I could in Toronto, too. While it seems that the clientele might be younger in the west because of the economic growth you've noted, the cost of housing here is the highest in North America which has a significant impact on their disposable income. Older men have usually lived here for a long time, or and are better established financially. When I lived in Toronto, nearly all of my clients lived there, too. Here in Vancouver, almost half of them are from out of town, and more than half of them are from the States. I can't make any comparisons with Ottawa, though it does make sense to me that the clientele may be older there. As for being more polite, many companions say that Ottawa is the "no show" capital of Canada!

There's no question that hypothetical questions are useful, and accurate information is essential. That having been said, and with apologies in advance if I should seem too cranky or irritable, I'd like us all to be clear about a few things. The person who is most at risk of harm is always the paid companion. Always. If the hotel is raided, if there's a fire, an earthquake or other disaster, even the highest-paid companion should expect to be disowned by her client who will suddenly be transformed into a fine, upstanding man of exemplary character and ethics, while she will be understood to be nothing more than a drug-addicted hooker who has lured the poor fellow into a compromising situation. Most paid companions will take their clients' identities to the grave rather than release the information to anyone as long as we're safe. If a client compromises our safety and security, all deals are off. People who are genuinely worried about being arrested or held on suspicion of committing a crime should think long and hard about whether they can afford to take such a risk. If you, the client, invite a paid companion into your hotel room and pay her for her time, with or without sexual activities, both you and she are acting fully within the law. If the companion has taken a hotel room and you're the first person to meet her there, whatever transpires between the two of you is perfectly legal. If you're her second or subsequent guest, the room may be considered to have transformed, legally speaking, into a common bawdy house and, in the event of the hypothetical raid, you could be charged with being found in it. If this is a concern, see my point #5. Innkeepers and paid companions have been in cahoots for millennia. Each of us makes a considerable part of our living in relation to the services the other provides. The more one pays for such services, the less one has to worry about risk. I can find no references to any Hilton, Fairmont or Four Seasons hotel in Canada being named as the location of a common bawdy house. Four and five-star hotels don't get raided in Canada. Paid companions are at least as concerned about risks and liabilities as are our clients. We, too, have families, partners, lovers, employers, community standing and personal dignity to protect. Television is television. It is not reality. Crime dramas are not reliable sources of information about any aspect of the law, the criminal justice system, the courts or likely outcomes. Fear-mongering is not helpful.

I've been natural, but trimmed, for years until recently when I finally agreed to have it all waxed off. It's been interesting to see the reactions. Some love it, many don't comment at all, and a couple of my regulars have sulked, feeling put out that I did it without recognizing that they preferred things to stay as they were. Even so, they're still booking appointments! Waxing is easier than shaving and not painful, to me, anyway, so that's what I've done. I would go back to au naturel, though.

Suzanne Sommers is incredible. She's 64 and she's been cancer-free (breast cancer) for over 10 years, too. Barbara Amiel, the writer, who is also married to Conrad Black, is 71 and looks like she's 25 years younger. Granted, these women can afford the judicial use of plastic surgery and hormones, but still.... I'd also like to say that men in their 60s are wonderful. Some of my all-time favourite visitors are in this age bracket. The article Loralee posted emphasized financial security, which is important, but what I notice is a kind of genuine patience that comes with real maturity. Men in their 60s may not be able to have three orgasms in a night, it's true. But they can have one, sometimes two, that are deeply satisfying, which is what matters, anyway. In my admittedly rarely-humble opinion, men in this age bracket are the finest lovers, too. One can expect that, if they want sex, it's because it really matters to them that they and their partner should enjoy the encounter as fully as possible. They know how women's bodies work, where the important places are and how to touch and torment them. Playing is a process: the goal is pleasure, rather than some particular peak experience that brings everything to an end.

Wow! What a breath of fresh air!

Erectile dysfunction is common in middle-aged and older men who have type-2 diabetes and in men who take medication for high blood pressure. Other medical conditions and medications can cause men to be unable to achieve or maintain erections. But their penises are still sensitive. Hand jobs and prostate massage are both very effective for orgasm and ejaculation. Or, so I've noticed.... ;-)

The We-Vibe II is great; she can use it on her own or with you. But unless you're sure she'll be happy to receive a sex toy, you might start with some massage oil/cream or candles, then suggest you go shopping together.