Annessa

whoa....deep breath (to myself, not you) everyone is trying to help you out here. You asked a question and we are offering our opinions, both SPs AND Members who have been hobbying for quite some time. despite the fact that I may not respect certain members I definitely tip my hat if they are trying to contribute to the thread with their knowledge ....ONLY to HELP you......not shoot you down or call you out, as it appears you may have interpreted it due to the last angst-ridden post. know that this is a community where we are all offering our input to it's contributers....and those of us who care about this industry (be it member or MP or SP etc) are NOT trying to correct or give pointers on your approach (which if I'm not mistaken, you ASKED for guidance...no?) because we are trying to embarrass you or make a fool out of you. That is not the idea here The only thing that will make fool out of anyone in this community is someone asking a question and making a personal attack back at someone who was trying to give their input and advice from years (and in YS's case, DECADES) of experience Sometimes responses take a bit of digestion time before jumping to a conclusion or interpretation....we're here to help you out. Take it in....digest it before reacting defensively ....and realize that if you do so and responded thankfully, that you are being respectful to the members here AND also winning over the hearts of the ladies on the board. no-brainer here, but the opposite reaction will have the opposite effect. I may not even like the member you're trying to put down in this case (, but I will always admire someone who accepts any opinion or advice...even if they dont agree...without the need to put them down because they feel their ego has been challenged) if you feel questioned or offended or that someone is trying to make you look like an idiot it is always best to perhaps ask for clarification via PM to them before jumping down their throats......if approached properly who knows, perhaps you may get the clarification you saught after in the first place. PS. No one gets a discount here because of apparent "ass kissing" as you hinted at........however, you will definitely be avoided and possibly added to a "personal black-list" by quality SPs if you keep cutting up members on here because you may not like their honest answers and react immaturely.

there is always no harm in being honest (after doing your research) with a lady in saying that you are looking to book a, say, 1.5 hour appointment.....with the "potential of extending" as you are looking for a lengthly booking but want to make sure you click....then leave it up to the lady as to whether she would like to take the booking or not. some ladies only se one client a day/evening so in this situation, it might work better for you. however dont jump right into booking the full 4 hours at first unless you are willing to leave her a healthy tip if you decide to cut the booking short due to lack of chemistry

lol....someonhow I was predicting that would be commented on haha

when I used to model my agent would make me lie and say I was 5'9" (I'm 5'8") generally speaking if you wanted to do runway you had to be between 5'9" and 5'11" if you were a model who was 6' you lied and said you were an inch shorter..obviously there are acceptions...like Kate Moss is 5'6" etc such a crazy industry how two inches makes or breaks your career lol I'm with Erin in that I wonder where on earth this woman would shop! I mean I know they have MR. Big and Tall stores....but...um...? ;-)

agreed Apex! take a cab home and then bus back the next day to get the car if those who are finicky on costs dont want to cab both ways. parking garages are also a safe bet that your car doesn't have a ticket the next day too. not to go back to driving services but there was this really neato miniature motor-bike drivers in the UK that would drive to your car if you needed a lift, the bike then folded up and fit in your trunk, the driver would drive your car with you in it to where you needed to go and upon arrival, ride their motor-bike away probably not the best idea for ottawa winters tho :-( lol

Great post Mod, I agree that no high-posting member should be treated any higher than another in their behavior on this site. I do remember that incident was definitely "irked" by it. I'm happy that mod took action over it. a member advertising for bottom-line prices and services among those ladies who work hard to build their reputations over their price-tags are definitely in a non-direct sense making times harder for the wonderful women on here There are many new members that join everyday and do need to see the light when their treatment of the ladies, (if foul, and is a pattern) is not appropriate. but I applaud mod for facing questioning about this high-posting member and putting the ladies' interests on this site first. Hopefully this can be applied eventually to any Cerb member (high-posting member comfortable with his rep, or newbie needing to be shown that 'this isn't how we do things here") who makes the mistakes as a pattern that does not respect what this site is about. Members who have a high standing on the boards ( as mod pointed out with said incident) should not be granted any favors if they mis-treat the ladies on the site, rip ladies off, down-play the worth of the dollar to all involved etc. As mod pointed out, whether you're a high poster or not rules are rules, and because a trust is established between the women here or the mod it does not give ANY member the right to relax and break them. correct? That being said it does definitely send a message when a high presence member is called out by mod. Hopefully this is being applied equally to all members. I think mod said it best when he said "It's just taking advantage on another persons bad situation really when you do that and I would like to say we are all above that... maybe one day." I'm am in complete agreement that I hope ppl one day don't take as huge of a disadvantage of anyone's situation, or put their situation before anyone's else's on here. Granted, we all learn lessons (hopefully) in every event that crosses us unexpectedly as SPs, but for the moment lets just hope for less interference and more contributions.....as no one (mainly mod) needs the stress or conflict of an interference, but a definite nod is given when the right thing is done

A great appreciation for the honorable mention. Thanks you Buggernot! considering that I know and love many of the ladies you mentioned it feels like a little family of mutual appretiation. Thank you for sharing your experiences for all :-)+ I will add that I have and hope to do more duos with the lovely dotted Kate, and having experienced another awesome and REAL lady FINALLY (which is rare in this industry sometimes amongst mis-matched duos) She is definitely a lady that is as strong minded if not more than myself. But her modesty on a session and inner beauty are what appeal to many men.....and many women like myself as well. Genuine girls are in my high ranks for sure! Buggernot, you may have the ring and flowers but I'm with jerican in that I may be one of many to fight you for her heart!....well I'd settle for less, but I think its fair to say that few ladies turn my crank in the bedroom and in her demenor and all-around grace. She is definitely a winner and despite the recent dramas, I hope that she is allowed to return eventually. I have no idea what was said but I hope eventually things can be amended....on all sides. *cue daisy inserted in riffle barrel* :-) xoxo Annessa

I agree with this. for any document I sign with my landlord i sign three copies and so do they (I keep one).....if you want to keep up with making sure everyone is on the same page of your decision, do the same. make three copies of the agreement, keep one, have them all signed at the same time in pen and if the document is more than one page and stapled, have yourself and your landlord initial each page, have the signed copy of the management company either fax you back a stamped and signed copy or have them send you a hard copy to your address

I have been stopped before and the best thing you can do is be completely honest if you drank a while back ...I drove myself and others home, but came out at 8pm and hit the bar with a shot of jager and a glass of wine right away....i didn't drink anything after that after a really drunk girlfriend came out and I didn't drive until after 3am driving her and some friends back from a Shawarma joint.... it was out of my way but they were all IN THE BAG....if you stutter and lie and have *some* alcohol in your system but under the limit.....if you have said "no" you have been lying and the cop may let you go....but I've heard of cops who have held ppl for lying to an officer that they had consumed ANY alcohol that night (not right, but some new cops are trying to make their quotas for the night and sometimes may try anything) never assume you're not going to get brethalized.....I was lucky that time that I blew under and almost wet myself in fear because I didn't know how my body would react to my early alcohol consumption and to the test....even if it was very early in the evening that I drank in the instance of question towards it, or just in the logic behind it, just dont drink and drive. a seemingly convienient route sometimes may be a deadly route for some (or yourself!)...be it having your car impounded and liscence taken away (the least of your worries) or the lives of yourself or the lives of others and the sake of your's and their families. (something you and others will have to live with forever) I'll take the short-term hassle ANY day: leaving my car downtown

this is an off-work situation but i have a close friend in a band that always sends spam-texts to all his friends and fans saying something like "hey you! whats goin on? are you coming to the show tomorrow?" Then I'd find out that the msg wasn't personal as i did this weekend during a pretty big show downtown...in the lineup with friends (which was more than probably 150 ppl long!) I heard they they had all got the same message so the invitation wasn't personal, youch...i waited longer than I should have in the cold and then was just so angry after texting my "friends" in the band who we could see smoking outside who checked their phones and then texted back that they already played and that we didnt need to come in to support them in the contest.. that i left (as they were good friends of mine). I told them i left in a text and to not invite me to any future shows unless they had my name in the message. ... it might seem like a different situation completely but many SPs get "spammed" by clients. it may not "hurt" us as most of us are pretty strong to appreciate the realities.....but it still taps a nerve....we work very hard to make our communications as personal as we can, and in the end it is a good sign that you will receive the most personal session. I get it somewhat,: they want to have a couple back-up options and some are terrible at replying when its needed. Generally tho, if someone feels like the subject of a chain of generalized requests and you fulfill them.....they're going to consider the sender guilty of making a mass request. how many people get forwards in their emails that are moving or appeal to them and there is only BCC and everyone thinks that the sender was thinking of them...or something perfect example: a gent who just recently was banned for ill behavior towards a lady on here used to send out multiple generic messages...subject : "want to get to know you" (or something of the like) but would send out multiple spam messages starting with "hey sexy!" or "hey baby!" many of us decided not to see him after comparing our messages. Some even said that because of his behavior to another we did not fee comfortable seeing him)....there was then some serious hate mail sent to the girl who saw him last from him....this is obviously an extreeme case tho....but still, something to think about the great and honest gentlemen definitely dont want be thrown into the same category of this guy....but after many of us have experienced issues like this this, we tend to cut things off right from the start when being addressed at first contact in a certain way....our red flags go up. And those of us who have been in the business long enough know to listen to our gut and acknowledge those red flags .... after what that one SP went through (which was pretty brutal) can anyone blame us for being careful? (at this point I realize this may seem like a total long winded rant but I dont want to re-hash anymore into the subject and just...yanno...get it all out) I am drawn however to a new light when I recently responded to a new client's email entitled "hey sexy" the content of the email started off with my name....so it was a tough draw....however I politely mentioned that given some of the most recent threads on this that addressing someone you dont know like that is sometimes not needed and sometimes a simple "hello" in the headline is awarded. I was honest in saying that I was just trying to give an opinion that may be helpful even if he decided not to see me. I thought he would be completely offended. he wrote back and was still interested and apologized....sometimes people just dont know, and thats ok (and thats why we're here to provide our experiences with seemingly small things leading to larger issues from our experiences), but this was the first non-angry response I got from a reply like mine.....i told him not to worry, this man has my business :-)

are they the circular packaged "ONE" (the brand name) condoms that come in the rectangular tin with the plastic flip-top? I've seen one smaller client who used to swear by these but because he could not be caught dead by his wife carrying these home would usually give the boxes to me after...they didn't work as well on my more micro-clients tho and i wouldn't suggest them for that...yes they were snugger than your average condom, but he definitely didn't have the smallest "member" on cerb as he claimed, there are way smaller men that still need equal protection.... this is a great thread because its much easier for us ladies to go out and find these for our lovely clients...I have a friend who worked at a Shoppers counter and would always roll her eyes at the girls who would waltz up to the counter and almost brag that their boyfriend's member was too big for the magnums and request an alternative.....however she said she tried her best to help a gal who said her "boyfriend" was on the *much* smaller side and wanted to find something for him..(she thought to herself...."awwww, you love him so much that you will go and try to find his micro-condoms for him....thts love!).....really the gal was someone I knew who was an SP....but the shoppers gal didnt need to know, lol generally I would recommend visiting some very well known sex shoppes here in Ottawa....as well, dont rule out the straight geared ones...there is also "one in Ten" or other gay friendly stores...obviously they sell condoms too and might also be able to help in the specifics area...on top of that the links provided by mod as well :-) happy hunting! xoxo

its funny, i was thinking about two situations that might make this more clear for guys...I was having a convo with a girlfriend about this subject and she said something that kinda brought it to light for me: its like when you're walking down the street looking good on your way out and a guy you've never met turns his head and says "hey sweetheart!" or "hey baby"....the likliness that you are going to stop and talk to that guy is probably zero, you may cringe and keep walking...even if hes a really good-looking guy. maybe its a pride thing but in the end, you dont know them. in the same situation and you walked by a guy you knew and the called out "hey sweetheart!" it might make you giggle and you'd walk right up to them and start chatting if it was appropriate. A name would have always been better in any situation but I think the lesson is, if you dont know her, dont use terms of endearment.....or you might give off a similar reaction to the random guy on the street. hope that made sense, it was an interesting angle so I just thought I would share :-)

thanks for the clarification YS :-)

yay antlerman, many congrats! keep the hilarious posts coming! :-)

many thanks mod, (and ALL those who voted) as well as the amazing ladies in the poll as well!! I am definitely in great thanks! thanks mod, for the recognition (Not to Nagg.....but in the future, however, my name has 2 Ns :-) (aNNessa) not a huge deal for sure, just making sure future search-references aren't swayed. Thank you EVERYONE!

self indulgent "cats"'s herding should not be seen as high posters IMO. quality over quantity in this site I would hope? regardless of the ratio of posts a member has, one would expect that a member doesn't post to hear themselves talk...errr.....write? Lets all take this past week as a learning experience that no matter what is seen, heard or read, (or what is even resulted in a poll) that a diplomatic point of view is never an unjust ideal....if approached properly. If we all see ourselves or others (high posters) as "self indulgent "cats".......then our contributions are already being not as post-before-quality...by even those participating like YS mentioned lets not read too much into everyone's postings, and let hope that everyone contributing is doing so for the right reasons, after all, the votes are in and i certainy am not writting at this moment to read and re-read my responses. (aka hear myself talk)

my sentiments exactly, we're all lovely beautiful women on cerb, we definitely shouldn't read too much into appreciation threads like this...it'd be too much negative energy spent on something thats supposed to be positive :-)

its funny, i thought I had already voted for this poll...ages ago, turns out I hadn't so I went and cast my votes now! procrastination was always kinda one of my weaknesses;-)

I would have to agree, separating the two as two separate projects for questioning even would have to be implemented. I'm no supporter of crack houses, but they shouldn't be in the same category of brothels and should be approached separately. Just my opinion. I feel similar in the case that claimed because of a stabbing in the parking lot of a massage parlor that those places were havens for illegal and troublesome behavior...yet blind eyes are turned everyday to nightclubs that have numerous shootings and stabbings outside from their patrons

I echo the sentiments as well although some may claim I jumped on mod, I explained and properly appologized for the situation being taken the wrong way and for it to lead to others putting down his role in the community....totally not my intention and I feel more than a little rough it had that outcome :-( Mod has been a great voice here. like many who are great at any job they do however, the time comes for a vacation...a break from the stress. Mod has a lot to deal with on this site so I dont think we should interpret his time away as a good-bye or abandonment from Cerb...obviously hes not going to leave us in improper hands if someone else were to help him with his duties. but sometimes a breath of fresh air is required sometimes As an SP I've taken a break now and then from the industry for a week or so so that i can return with a fresh outlook, I may also follow mods lead in being less vocal or properly wording myself more carefully before posting so that no-ones feelings are spared in the process we look forward to when mod feels the time is right to return to providing us with his imput, but I'm sure he will not be far, lets just all stop tugging in his sleeve for now and allow him to do what he feels is best. as a sidenote I dont think its fair to say that ppl are ore vocal now due to trying to win over the majority for awards, anyone who has a sense of everyone's post history and personality thus far will definitely see through an alterior motive like that, we hope anyway. xo Annessa

amen. amen. amen :-)

I dopnt see it as such a bad thing to call my clients sweetie, but then again this is when I have some sort of relationship I've earned with them clients who send out first-time emails with an SP hoping to connect should know that addressing us as "hey baby" in a first attempt at connecting is going to sway their chances in a negative way also many of us have received copy-and-paste emails that are all started with something like baby. sweetie, sexy, etc.... because the client couldnt take the time to write a personalized email to each SP he was trying to reach

I wasn't my thread is regarding a fairly open discussion being closed asap. I'd like a chance to explain that my post may have been mis-read. http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=92890#post92890 "Your twisting what I said and just throwing in "drug addicts who are "forced" into the industry" into your comment (this is called adding weight to your argument - this is exactly what the media does.. what you are doing to me right now)." NEVER did I or would I EVER say that about your opinions, I was simply commenting on how happy I was about the rights group that encouraged positive and less forced opinions of the general public about sex-work when I said "I'm in agrement with Auralie that having sat in on a couple sex-workers' rights meetings and hear everyone give a cheer to the positive side of the industry...women working by choice, not by the media's portrayal of high-school drop outs and drug addicts who are "forced" into the industry" never have I claimed you stood behind the media's drug addicted portrayal of the industry! Only that certain stereotypes should not be regarded as a "norm" for all the ladies here, those stereotypes that we are all flung into this business because we all have very little life experience or dropped out of high school generally will hit a sour note with any SP as we've seen already from a few replies, I'm not sure why my opinion is being the first to be discredited. bringing me to the next part: and comments like "those are the handfull of girls on here.....not the proper ones" Are you kidding me? Someone needs to take your high horse away the arrogance is too much. The new ladies just need to learn how the business works. They should be just as welcome as you are. where did I ever say they weren't? or that me and other ladies were "above it all"? believe me I'm extremely humble in my profession and those who have seen me know so. I am only here to keep on learning and to help those that I might have a tidbit about my experiences to give.....but that doesnt make me above anyone...SP OR client! If you as mod are willing to give out an opinion be also prepared to receive another's (something that is encouraged as we are all learning from one another... a discussion board. I never said your opinion was wrong, just that your statement was "bold")....and sometimes realize that people are also looking out for YOU too. I regret not making my initial contact a PM, I did not mean to try to embarrass you or call you out on anything or make you feel attacked. If i did so then I really am sorry. Cerb is awesome, if anything me saying that this site hosts many wonderful educated ladies and that places such as CL could learn from it is a COMPLIMENT! why discredit your own site and the ladies in it? should I "get real" and be prepared that clients may potentially lower their expectations? "The new ladies just need to learn how the business works. They should be just as welcome as you are. I am sure you did not start in this business knowing everything... like everything it has a learning curve and yes, cerb is a place to HELP them learn and HELP them not make mistakes like this. If you are too "proper" to help the new ladies that is your choice but it's not a supportive choice and that comment makes you look bad." I'm in COMPLETE agreement that new ladies need to learn how this industry works. As I was not a pro at first and reeived many great pointers in the beginning.... but telling the client that bad industry is to be expected due to where some of us come from doesn't help that learning curve. If anything it may even stunt it or make excusable. Lowering a client's expectations due to pointing out that "a lot of ladies turn to this business not because they LOVE the BUSINESS but because they have very little choice!" does not help sometimes, just like the collegue that shows up late everyday is generally not given any more slack because hes younger than the rest of the employees. I'm trying to help here, not put anyone down (be it SPs clients or Mod), and I am truly sorry that this has been taken the wrong way, mod. Hopefully we can all work together and see everyone's side of things and realize that we are all trying to look out for each other, AND this site, AND you. If this thread gets me booted (as you've asked me to express my opinion maturely [which I felt I did before and am making absolute sure I do so now] or leave the site altogether) then so be it, but I have no wish to leave anytime soon so hopefully this apology to you through the members on the board here and in PMs has been enough Annessa

manerlessness is now going in the new dictionary in my head, its a word NOW!....j/k. (thats just what i say when I realize I've completely invented a non-existing word and tried to pass it off....it it gets the point across, no ones gonna hound your vocabulary...at least not me I'm in agrement with Auralie that having sat in on a couple sex-workers' rights meetings and hear everyone give a cheer to the positive side of the industry...women working by choice, not by the media's portrayal of high-school drop outs and drug addicts who are "forced" into the industry....that claiming, mod, that for the mostpart the women on this site fall into that category strays very far from "protecting the ladies", something this site has always been a haven for. by putting out there that we are girls who "dont know better" or dont have many lights on upstairs due to our supposed lack of education or being able to hold a 'real" job, you also discredit the many wonderful female presences on this board who have university degrees, are doing things right, perhaps have a learning curve to adjust to sometimes, but those of us who are here, regardless of our education or upbringing, should not be exposed to the idea to clients that this notion is the norm and that we might not know any better. This is not a statement that is looking out for our safety. If you state that most of the girls save for a handful of us are just not too bright because of a certain portrayal (similar to the media's) then you are opening the floodgates for men to expect that an SP that they find on this wonderful board is going to most likely make more mistakes. what does this mean long-term? well as said, "what goes around comes around" right? (only that was meant towards the girls getting no-shows so you can only expect them to treat others as they have been treated. right? wrong. didn't a wise jewish guy in a really thick book...i dunno, his name started with a J...say "do unto others as you would have done unto you?) if these clients are told that their SP is probably the duller of the bunch, what kind of effort are we then encouraging on their end? Not trying to start a fight with mod here but that was a very bold statement to make about an industry we are supposedly all trying to protect in this great community. yes, there are a handful of newbie-girls, or girls who discover the hard way that this is not for them but I stand by the opinion that those are the handfull of girls on here.....not the proper ones. This is Cerb, not CL Lets look out for the ladies' safety....oh and as a sidenote I do think the OP should PM the name of the girl politely, however hopefully she has learned something from his thread if she sees it

sadly there was no alcohol in my possession this morning....would have been nice tho, lol