fortunateone

Her influence on the public, and the media, is exactly why she did what she did. She knew as well as any pro sex work presenter that these proceedings are nonsense, time wasting, and won't affect the outcome. The con senators also made that very very apparent with their own comments and questions. It is like they created the bill, and they are MPs, they are supposed to be senators not party mouthpieces. it was basically a waste of time for most anti c36s, when we have people there talking about situations that have nothing to do with adult consensual sex work (i.e. pedo sex abuse rings in the 90s, or a daughter who was abused by a classmate when she is in grade 9, and ends up with a bf doing sex work to pay for their drugs, then dies again at the hands of the BF, which again has nothing to do with adult consenting sex workers. C36 is meant to curb the income and ability of adult consenting sex workers to work, it has little to do with sexual assault victims, evangelical church goers, or preteens in group homes being forced to provide sexual services to pedophiles. The hearings were repeated on Saturday, and i saw a piece of it with Bedford, but got interrupted. the first time i didn't realize i'd been watching when she was answering questions, mostly because i flipped forward thru Benedet's talking head and missed it. I note that when she mentioned Duffy, that comment was her final one for many minutes, until she got a new question. So in the quote above article, everything after Mike Duffy, she did not say, at least not at that time. And after she said "......Mike Duffy', she threw down her pen, no whip. the whip was in her hand later tho lol I also note that she clearly did not discuss who the senators were with anyone. She was hostile towards the only ones who were willing to ask her questions. Guess who they were? The Liberal ones, two of them, offering her a chance to discuss and explain things that the Cons and their pet witnesses were misleading or misrepresenting or ignoring. She missed her opportunities, twice, (i didn't get to see everything, due to interruptions, and i hadn't recorded it sadly), when she could have done a lot of good. Saying 'ask me something important', should have been something said to any con senator who asked her a question. Sure, none of them would, they are afraid to give anti C36ers, especially one of the ones the whole SCC challenge is named after, but she had a chance, and to me she missed that chance. And that was the problem with how she was acting inside. I don't think you can argue that her passion is valuable. And her approach, clearly not a victim. It would be hard for any senators to look her way and think that any community protection legislation is going to help her, in fact, it might be used against her if they have their way.

that's awesome, lol.

The Cons are very aware of making sure that the pro C36ers are not just heard, but heard the same stories over and over. I am not sure what the point of hearing about someone who was killed in 1990 because she agreed to do sex work for her BF, and possibly to pay for their drug lifestyle, because most work was streetwork then, and also the anti solicitation laws were very new, so we've got all that going on with someone who was already very young, trying to nagivate negotiations with street clients. Existing laws and the SCC decision would protect her more than C36 would have, in other words. My main point tho, is the Smith's run the John schools, or speak at them. One of the things that i did not fast forward thru was them bringing up the $20 million and their expectation that THEY should be getting a piece of that. So it comes down to why are some of these people there? Seems to me, make sure that some of the govt $$ come their way. What's the best way to do that? Make sure that we blame sex work for the death of their daughter, not the fact that in this case she was assaulted by a classmate when she was a young teen, and that affected a lot of her subsequent choices.

That tends to be the case, it's an endless cycle. And I'm just talking about regulars, who already have seen me, may have my number saved, but if I don't bump or post an ad that day, they assume i'm off for the day or something. And keep in mind, i have very few ads out there that do not mention that i am available 7 days a week. no reason to not see an ad this morning and assume I've taken the day off. For sure, some times i have taken the day off, but no need to assume that. Advertising regularly and often is like any business that turns the "open' sign on when they unlock the front door. Signal to all clients, old or new, that we are available.

Another good article from that writer. I am looking forward to her recaps of the senate proceedings as well.

i see, but you know where she works? or just that she works somewhere in a certain area, and her schedule. that makes it harder for sure.

if you have her work information, then contact her at work directly, voice to voice communication, not text or email. That shows that you are concerned about not reaching her, and that you are taking that extra step to reach her another way. You might be suprised to hear her thank you for contacting her because.........(her describing to you what happened to her phone/internet/relevant details). You have not crossed into stalker zone, so don't get too worried about how she might see this, or if you are crossing any lines by contacting her more than once a day after making plans she failed to show up for. this would be a perfectly reasonable thing to do, i think, you could call shortly before her work shift start time, and shortly after it ends to try to reach her. and don't try to talk yourself into something by saying 'she should have'. we suggested something happening to her phone, could mean her contacts and phone #s are not available. I'd say try to reach her via her work, if she didn't show up for work for example, that is another clue.

To me, you are over reacting and coming up with far fetched scenarios, but i am basing that on what you posted. You are in the middle of a conversation and it stops suddenly, not with you saying something off base and her saying, ok, bye, just mid way? Or you were having a conversation that came to its natural end and you end the conversation with a 'see you later'. One thing is not like the other. The first example tells me that her phone died, she might not have another one yet, and/or she might not have your number anywhere else to call you from a different line. Neither scenario or even your description of the relationship lead me to believe she dropped you like a hot potato. I don't want to ask how old you are, because it makes no sense that anyone over 18 would think that paying for a couple of meals is anything like taking you for a ride. if you go overboard, if you leave a bunch of messages or texts or anything that she gets later, you will regret it, believe me. Scale it back show some concern, what if she was in an accident, texting while driving, got mugged, fell down some stairs, or just can't pay her phone bill because she got set up in a bad plan and you and she have been cooing at each other with lengthy phone calls and texts she can't afford, and it may take days before she can make a payment to get her phone reconnected. When leaving a message, keep it brief and keep it simple. Don't leave a message asking if she thinks she wants to go slow, or stop seeing each other, or anything even remotely similar to that, or anything even remotely not just a concern that she is OK. ;)

I agree. Even my 87 year old relative says the govt is never going to get rid of prostitution. They should stop wasting their time on legislation like this and do something useful. :)

this is good advice. On re reading the OP's post, I don't really get the idea that he is looking for sps to discount their rates, but to find sps who provide at lower rates already? It begs the obvious question tho, what are those magical lower rates that he is looking for?

When they aren't trying to demean sex workers, they are usually talking about how it is illegal. They do this by saying they don't want 'it' legalized. They can never seem to comprehend it (and I mean this also when the entire article they are commenting is on the topic of the fact that prostitution is already legal). They also can never seem to comprehend choice, or as in the examples above, they seem to give them permission in their minds to cast insults at the sps who do it fully willingly as adults. I don't get it, we are either coerced underage delusional drug addicted victims in need of rescue, then suddenly we are not? hmmmmmm

There are some conditions to gaining access, which i cannot really remember but I'm sure someone will pm you with what is needed. It is a good topic for private discussion, but it is also something that comes up from the other end as well, the great rate debate. I can offer one tip: And if the longer sessions appeal the most to you, then you set the sorts of rates that make that very clear to anyone. Which usually means the added hours are at a much much lower rate than the single hour rate. so instead of 2 hours being 500, your 3 hour rate might be 500.

You have to have outside help, you won't be able to rely on sibling help if they don't step up to the plate, you will be the one there waiting. There are services (cut backs not withstanding) that will come in whether once a day or a couple of times a week, where they are responsible for some of the things (in a health care way) that you may not want to be doing. The next stage is organize a schedule for the others. If someone doesn't want to physically be present, and they have the means, they can help by paying for someone to do what needs to be done, taking the load off you. That might be a maid to do heavy cleaning and laundry once a week or so. Then there are the grandchildren ages, find someone who is able and willing. If everyone puts in a couple of hours a week, you can fill the days where it is not just you doing everything.

Thanks for posting this, ER. It is a great article.

I don't think you need to be actively seeking new sps in order to participate. In fact, it is often nice to see the words of wisdom from someone who has 'retired' so to speak, i think you get some perspective. Happy life. :)

It sounds like cerb might benefit from a sub forum for Health and safety questions. Then those threads would be in one place, and no one would have to search. I think it would actually be hard to search, as what would you use 'bj", "bbbj", 'b.b.bj" etc, a lot of ads would actually come up. http://smartsexresource.com/ Answers to what and why and how in the link, but if you want to ask people what and why and how, well there are 100 answers and all variations on the same two or three themes. And at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter what other people do or think about the topic, only what you do or think about the topic, after you check out the link so you know what you are actually thinking about.

The OP's example is pretty specific. I find the other example, trying to imply it is OK to reveal or link one members handle here to a different handle on a different site, is malicious as well. They imply that someone is up to something because they use a different handles on a different forums. There actually is no moral obligation for people to use the same handles from site to site, or to tell everyone who or what they are and do. I actually think it is pretty malicious to run around and suggest that it is, and at the same time start posting the connections as tho they are the local witch hunt group. http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=102834&highlight=handles http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=20104 Also interesting, when you read old threads, the number of people talking about their handle and that is different from the handle that is posting the comments. It is quite clear that several people have changed their handles over time, especially the sps. Just sayin. Doesn't mean they are up to no good. In any case, i just think it is too bad this kind of negativity is creeping onto cerb.

Client first time caller: Hi, I've never seen you before, but today is my BD and i'm looking to see if you do any Birthday specials. SP: "zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Like I haven't heard that one before. It's is second to the "I'm a student' (therefore i should have a discount) and close in line to "I'm a senior" (and therefore I should have a discount). " Here's how it really works. Client first time caller: Hi, i saw your ad, are you available on X at Ypm? SP: yes I am, thanks for calling, see you then. I have to ask, you have seen my rates yes? Client caller: Yes, it all looks great. It's my birthday, and I am planning this for a special treat for myself. SP: happy birthday, see you soon. OR Client 106th time caller: Hi, you available on X at ypm, it's my birthday and I'm looking to treat myself. SP: absolutely, see you then. And then sp proceeds to pick up something special for her long time regular, even if all it is is a cupcake with a candle.

On Big Brother 16, one of the houseguests grew a Duck Dynasty type of beard before entering. Because he ended up being such a popular guy, there is supposed to be a twitter account called Fearthebeard (because they kept trying to get him evicted, and he kept winning the competitions he needed to to stay in the game hence Fear the Beard status lol)

Basically under ALL circumstances, this is libel. That's the basis for libel, stating something that is a lie as a statement of fact, in order to tarnish someone's reputation. What some people mistake as libel is when an unflattering fact is made public, they call it slander, but it isn't. As long as it is true fact it isn't libel. The anti who posts lies (which is basically ALL the time) is guilty of defamation, libel, and when they are interviewed, slander. The person slandered has a good case for a lawsuit. Before C36 was presented, the media and attention was fully behind them. They pranced around spouting off their misinformation and misleading stats, and the papers gobbled it up and parroted it out. then the hearings, and the C36 came out, and all the lawyers and all the organizations, and even the UN or Aids research groups all come up, and finally the media is thinking, hey, this is really stupid this C36. And suddenly like June 3 you wouldn't see one reporter do one article without showing 3 antis propaganda versus one single sp comment. June 5, they almost all of them swing completely to the other side. The antis started freaking out. I've seen a few of them whining and complaining about media bias, and how 'they" (as in us, as in 'the pimp lobby") are getting all the attention, all the stories, and shockingly, the general population is starting to LISTEN. Suddenly many of the human trafficking organizations (that get donations and fundings) are being investigated, and revealed to be made up of lies and fraud. It is drawing attention to the rescue industry in Canada. Are we to expect the same, people ask? Are these people inflating stats and putting up fake ex-sps to talk about things that never happened? Are we being duped? And if we are, shouldn't we start listening to the sps who will be affected by C36? I think that is what the reporters started asking. And that really stung the antis. They were so horrified, they are beside themselves. The name calling and jibes they started while the pro sex work speakers talked during the hearings crossed over to the internet, twitter, they created a website about the evil johns (as in p erb/ t erb type reviews alot from 2005), and another one the day Chris Atchison (http://www.johnsvoice.ca and sex research study (can't remember the website)) spoke at the hearings to discredit him and susi (sue davis, sp advocate) because they were so afraid of the research he presented (shockingly, chris wants us to believe that all clients are not monsters, and that some clients have suffered some form of violence at the hands of an sp or sp encounter ... THAT one really infuriates them :) ) /ranting about antis

The two things are not mutually exclusive. i think what cat was getting at was that some services are provided due to market demand, and her points (seemingly missed?) that it is FAR more successful with trust and some history with the client, makes her point bang on (to use the drum analogy). An sp can enjoy daty and yet still provide it as a required service due to being a GFE provider due to market demands, and primarily for the consideration of the client not herself. If he is successful at it, that is her personal bonus lol. But an expectation of multiple orgasms possibly a few times a day due to seeing more than a couple of clients, and all multiple daty orgasms, just really isn't going to be realistic. Having said that, the majority of sps want to provide services that they themselves do enjoy, and not provide the ones they do not. So does someone who provides bbbjs or greek truly sincerely enjoy them, all the time with every single client because she just loves it that much? Or after the 5th greek client of the day, still doing it for the pure pleasure and not also because it is a service provided on her menu and ads? It is important, very important, to remember that this is not a FWB or GF/BF relationship, it is a service provider/client relationship, and the sessions are meant to be all about you. Some guys like to spend 45 minutes in daty, and figure that means they should get a discount because it is 'all for her'./ But 'all for her' doesn't pay the bills. re: rep comment, Peachy 'we' aren't assuming sps see up to 5 clients, but being realistic, especially for those who are on a limited schedule or traveling, it is entirely possible that on at least one day or once in a while, someone somewhere is going to see 5 clients. It is simply an example. Would it be better to say 3, 2 ? it is still more than most people experience in a single day. or even several days in a row with 2 a day.

If this is something you are looking into (a short notice same day sp) I would urge you to find the sps who have phone call as their main method of contact. I wouldn't think it makes any sense to send an email on the day you are interested in booking and expect anyone to have seen it and replied to it in a time frame that you can work with. Plus SUPER SLOW back and forth. Same with text. one line. wait. one line reply. wait. back and forth, omg. lol. Just phone, you get voice mail, leave a message. I've told people whatever the message is, leave it, even if it is I'll call you back in an hour, call me if you get this within an hour, or don't call me back at all, or don't call me back unless you can call before 3pm, or i'm looking for 2pm, call me back if that's ok.

I usually have at least 4 and up to 8 different kinds of condoms, in different sizes. Some brands Larges and XLs are different than others. Durex XL for example, on the packages say XXL, what's that about? I have had Lifestyles Snug Fit, Ultrasenstive, Large, XL, and Skyn, and Trojan Magnum, Magnum XL, and Magnum thin (or whatever they are), and Durex regular and XL, and one brand that I have to replace the Snug Fit I can't buy in stores, Amorex regular. it is also a bit thicker, so good for those who are a bit sensitive. At every appt, unless i really know the client, I will take out at least 3 types ready. the Amorex, one regular size, and one large size. If i know them, i may be taking out the Durex XL or magnum. :) The other thing that is the responsibility of the sp is lube. You should always have it, and always use it. it is helpful to put a drop or two inside the condom, and have wipes on hand to clean your hands Or the area, after putting on the condom, in case you need them. It is really helpful if you make sure the lube inside is a warming one, adds more sensation with condoms. you never have to feel obliged to use someone else's condoms. This is your biz and your safety and your health, you are always 1000% in charge and in control. You can be polite and say, thank you, I have my own. And just leave theirs untouched. They can take them away with them if they wish. You can throw them away if you wish. The main thing as a new sp is to remember that you decide what you do and don't do, you tell them, they don't tell you, and once you have said no, no is the answer no matter how many times they may ask. You are not obliged to do something or charge something just because another sp does it or charges less, or goes over time. Rule #1, learn to say no. Rule #2 learn a polite way of saying time's up, time to go. Rule #3 learn an assertive way of saying, if you don't like it, let me show you the door. Rule #4, saying thanks, no, I don't drink, as your best and easiest way to avoid having them give you date rape drugs.

I think one of the first things she might want to enact is her body her rules. Just because a number of things are considered to be requirements in appts, doesn't mean that she has to do all of those things. In this situation, it would have been best to say no to digits. In many cases, men are too rough, and in some cases, women can get infections simply by offering that service. It is easy to add services and activities to a more limited menu, but it is very difficult to remove them. If she had a few more restrictions, she would be able to allow those things for repeat clients or for new clients who are able to show they can be trusted to do them. If you are working with her, showing her the ropes, so to speak, or on terms with her to talk about these things, this is good info for her to have. She doesn't have to do things that put her health or safety at risk just because all the cool kids are doing it, :) The first thing new sps need to learn is how to say no. It is unfortunate that her first experience should have been such a scary one. But saying no is important

This is a very nice story. thanks for sharing. :)