fortunateone

Good advice, well done. It reminds me of the occasional post from someone new where all they say is "who should I see?". Well, first tell us a bit about what you like or don't like, what basic services are necessary, what you can live without, types of ladies you are attracted to, etc etc. No point in me saying go see XYZ when XYZ is 22, slim, non-fs, and beyond the fella's budget, when his personal preference is gfe, 35+, and within a certain $ amount, not to mention location :-D

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/ottawa-notebook/justice-minister-presses-..........-to-remove-erotic-services-ads/article1784339/

When you see posts on any site, whether CL or other, report the posts each and every time. CL has a whole section for reporting abuse and harrassment. fwiw, they will remove such posts within an hour or less, but you must report them. abuse @ the name of the site will reach them as well as the online contact report form in the abuse/help/faq section. CL does not allow others to post info without the consent of the one being posted about, so you always use that as the reason for removal. For review forums, the best defense is a good offense. Post threads, without using caps, exclamation points, or hyteria, and state what is happening. That way, if/when something shows up, you have already addressed it and new handles or posters will be treated with suspicion. the board admin should respond quickly to your requests to remove personal info, they do normally anyway, so it should not be difficult to have them be proactive.

There was a recent show on Pickton, which I guess interviewed some of the people who were witnesses in the trial, so some of their stories unknown before. For example, many of the people he had around were drug addicts who helped out or stayed there. He also had some other pretty scary dudes that threatened one guy who saw something, and he ended up moving and laying low for years. He came out after he went thru rehab and ended up doing the right thing by following up on an earlier report he had made while an addict. (one of thosemany reports that went no where). Picton often had SWs staying with him. He often had the condition they couldn't use drugs there, as tho he was saving them I guess. when he felt threatened by one, she ended up dead. Her body was seen by another SW staying with him at the time. She said nothing. On more than one occasion, he traveled thru the DTES of Vancouver and picked up SWs, while he had one of these friends with him in his vehicle. The SW would feel safer getting in the truck and traveling far out of the area because this other woman was with him. There was more than one SW who did this with him. Some of those SWs made it back to town, some did not. Some of these former friends are still too scared to talk about it; others testified against him in the trial. Of those, the recovered addicts testified, the one too scared to say anything on camera is still using, afaik.

I think sometimes people want advice and/or to confirm that what they did or are thinking was reasonable or correct. I think the threads go astray when the majority of the comments tell the OP they were wrong lol. in a way they can be helpful, for both sides, on what to do or not do or so on to avoid misunderstandings and improve communications. ;-)

To the OP, I think you have been involved in this industry and on this site for long enough that you know that what you said was out of line. It just reminds me of all the guys who sometimes post about how sps should not be concerned about board members because they don't do this sort of thing lol. But report after report on this and other boards show that actually board members do try to intimidate sps with vague or direct threats, regardless of the fact that they know better. I think for emails, you should expect 24-48 hours minimum reply time before you follow up. Followups should be polite and short, as in, did you get my email, rather than "there are plenty of others for me to see" kind of comments. by the time you said this, it was far too late to apologize and even later to try to book an appt. Regardless of intentions, you come off (in your own words above) as arrogant and pushy, you managed to set a bad tone, and it would have made any encounter, if she had decided to give you a second chance, awkward and tense. Not great. Don't assume a series of coincidents are a conspiracy.

I think the point is to not alert, confirm, imply or suggest fs is available at any mp. If it is or isn't, it would not be an advertised option and would be hotly denied. Court ruling or not, LE can enter any public facility at any time; in the case of a city, city bylaws enforcement officers can and do enter such places anytime, and frequently do, to inspect licensing, the workers' ages and status, etc.

I would say make sure you realize she is always going to need more than 5 minutes, regardless if she is available last minute or not. You should look for some sps who are in your area, talk to them during the day to find out what their booking policies are, suggest the times most likely that work for you plus how much time you are able to give them as notice, and see which ones are able to do this. Also, keep in mind, that she might have booked an appt just prior to your call, and that is a reason she is not able to see you at the time you want. When you get lucky, it wil be she is there and just recently finished another appt so everything is set up, tidied up and ready to go. Another way to get lucky is she is all set up for an appt that canceled or no showed on her and you are free to arrive in 5-10 lol. You will find this kind of availability is easier with independents with incalls who have phones. Texting and emailing is not going to do it.

Being put off a couple of times sounds like she is honouring a previous commitment who has not shown up but has confirmed and/or verified he will be showing up. As sps all we can do is set up an appt, and if we have one on the way, is provide an ETA based on the first appt's ETA. If that first one is off even by 15 minutes, it upsets the balance. That is why it is important for the sp to have a system that helps prevent having her time wasted, and having her waste other people's time. So, if you make an appt, do whatever you have to do to confirm it, by voice, and don't accept any substitutes. When you allow texting, and someone is answering but saying she is not available what does that mean? She is textingyou in the middle of her appt with someone else? She is stuck in traffic and cant make it to the location? She isn't the one texting, and making these promises, someone else is? Who knows.

The nice thing about PV is that you do not have to go far to get away from the all inclusive resort. Pop into a taxi and just go to the old town and walk around, check things out, find the market or shops, etc. It's a tourist town and it is a destination for ex-pats, meaning the end result is it is not necessarily all the way authentico lol. But I think it is a great way to break into the Mexico experience. When I was there, we stayed in the old town area in the types of hotels frequented by middle class Mexican families. In the south coast, the same thing. These are not only good value, but a bit more fun lol. Here is some things to do, which I think with the time you have, might be the best thing. I took a horse back ride up to a river & waterfall area that was quite interesting. http://www.canadianliving.com/life/travel/10_things_to_do_in_puerto_vallarta_mexico.php http://www.puertovallarta.net/what_to_do/shopping.php When I took a year plus break that is where we started, then jumped thru by bus into southern Mexico, the border, and into Central America. Recently I have been doing a LOT of looking at CR, and would definitely recommend it as a safe destination for someone who, as it seems you might be, who doesn't need to spend the entire trip on the beach sipping margaritas. CR in the central valley, about an hour or so from San Jose, has active volcanoes (national park), butterfly fams, reptile zoo, coffee plantations, and then there is the activities like zip lines and white water rafting. There is something referred to as canopy tour I think, which involves those zip lines lol. Not my thing (I have issues with heights lol), but for a more advertous spirit, there you go. Then about an hour from that area, would be some beaches. http://www.govisitcostarica.com/region/city.asp?cID=388

I am not sure why people who are not sure about anything involve themselves in polls lol. re: the younger men, I think the stats are skewed cuz in general the younger man does not want limited access to sexually attractive females but full access. Knowing that the only chance they have with some women is pay for play is not appealing lol. I do find it revealing that the # 1 style promoted by the loudest anti-prostitution element is the one that got such low approval (charging the clients only, and not the sps). As an example of what should be used (i.e. the Swedish model) hopefully it will be obvious that it is the least likely to be approved by the general public. It looks like the only thing that would be approved is to decrim. Even when asked should the govt appeal, it is pretty obvious the majority think they should not go thru an appeal process. Interesting. I do find some of the "explanations" in the poll questions a bit leading and misleading. For example, to say profiting off of prostitution always leads to thoughts of pimping, when the realistic angle would be to ask if the polled think an sp should be able to pay people to assist her in her work, should she be able to support her adult children etc.

When I went in, it wasn't until I went back for the results I realized that I needed to ask for a hard copy in the first visit. It takes time, I found out, and asking when back for results means they take longer to prepare that rather than having it ready beforehand. So next time I will know to check the right box requesting it. The other thing is please please give out as much info as possible. The std clinic will process you anonymously under an alias if you wish, but the more info they get, the better they can track transmissions, sources or behaviours that can result in stds, etc etc. Better questionnaires is how the cdc can come up with statistics and warnings for safe sex practises. For example, if you fully disclose, they find out that you see sps, usually receive bbbjs and covered fs, but you contract chlamydia, the stats will show that transmission of std via oral sex. This is important information. The more details you can give the better. IT also educates the health professionals, when you come back for results 2-3 times a year, never getting an std, yet reporting that you have multiple sp partners over the past year. This shows that paid sex can be much safer sex, if yoiu see what I mean. For the hard copy, well this is your personal information, and you have a right to get it even if it inconveniences them. If they need time to prepare it, let them know you can come back for it later, but you will need it.

It's like you're reading my mind lol. Seriously, it is always wonderful to see the POV from the client side when this transaction takes place. To me, the activity of envelope stuffing, don't touch don't mention, seems more calculation and deliberate, than a simple and upfront honest process just like you describe. If the sp is upfront and open with payment, etc, it seems to me she will be upfront and open about her services and her personality. I also mean there is still something naughty and illicit about this whole thing. Why deny the client the opportunity to experience that extra thrill of excitement. Turning it into a psuedo date just takes that extra naughtiness out of it all.

I completely agree. I find it ridiculous (really mean no offense to the OP, but I mean this in very general terms because I do see it mentioned on occasion and can only chuckle about it) to pretend that this is not what it is. It is simple and elegant, and a wondrous thing, but it is an exchange of $$ for services, and to try to dress it up in an envelope, or godforbid, don't let me touch the money or the envelope, set the hidden envelope down without mentioning it whatever whatever, it is just too precious for me. And you know what, I have in 10 years not once not ever not even been shortchanged, had the money switched (because I am not gullible enough to leave it anywhere in plain sight, as mentioned here, it is given to me, I take it away, (this is where if necessary I use the led light lol), it cannot be tampered with, it is checked to be the proper amount for the time and session desired. What baffles me is if no one ever talks about what the heck is in that envelope, exactly what (and for how long) does everyone know what the heck is supposed to happen. To me, there are just so many downsides, and misunderstandings, it is just ripe for disaster, and to what purpose? To pretend the client is not paying for the sp's time? Why on earth do we need to pretend? Anyway, I have never embarrassed anyone, and no one feels humiliated, by checking about what they are here for, giving them the amount, and they present me with the amount. On the rare case I receive an envelope, I can take it away with me, but of course I am going to open the damn thing and find out what the heck he expects me to do. If it is 100 or 200, obviously I need to know. As you can clearly see, the envelope, the distaste for taking money directly, is one of my pet peeves. It is not illegal, so what exactly is the problem because if it is to pretend there is something else going on here, what happens is the deadbeats as described in the opening post USE this to take advantage of the sps. They count on this process, and the sooner sps stop doing it and start accepting this openly and with humour and professionalism, the sooner these guys are going to be stopped. It is, as mentioned fraud, and at the very least stealing.

This is not something that is typical in Vancouver. (I think there are storefront massage places in Ontario where hj is the maximum available). You can look into some massage parlours in Vancouver/Burnaby and see what they have to say about providing advertising and space for someone who does not want to do more. For our area, tho, it is typically only done by either independents in their own location or by some of the asian mp places where there is no mention of services at all, and they are primarily massage only with extras. But realistically, I think you can rule it out as an option. If you decide you want to offer "r&t" only sessions, you will have interest. IT is really quite a popular thing, and there are a lot of guys who only ever want that. You don't have to be concerned about offering that and then getting a lot of guys showing up who want or expect much more, and won't take no for an answer. Massage clients are pretty awesome, imo. Keep in mind you can't charge 200 an hour for this, usually even if you are younger and have limited touching, and are unskilled (as in you really don't know how to massage or tease or do not linger over the finish or unable to provide a sensual encounter) the most you can charge in spite of youth is about 100/hr. If you are able to take it to the next level, 120-140 is possible. If you offer a true tantric total body experience, and wish to go to 90 minute minimums, you would then be at the 200+ level. If you try to do this at a massage place, your rates are going to be higher than normal since there will be a room fee. Try broadway body care, it might be possible to be hj only there, it is not all asian.

I think this is a valuable idea. If she is getting a good reco, it is possible she can really benefit from the information, community and networking that comes from belonging to a forum, even if there is not a sudden increase in clients. I worked for at least 6 years without even knowing such forum existed, did little or nothing online anyway, but had I known, I could have avoided some basic mistakes and so on. It is nice.

Whatever you do, do NOT agree to a meeting with someone advertising for this on Vancouver's CL. Altho I am sure there is a sincere ad or two, this is where a couple of predators advertise for newbie sps/sbs. If you do get some replies, or have already replied to an ad, for gawdsake, google the information you receive. You should be patient, use the appropriate site, seeking arrangement. That is more of a site for serious ds and bs, imo. Don't just set up a profile, do your research. Look at the information that is there. Read up on the experiences, and tips and so on that is on these sites. Get serious about what exactly you need, and what exactly you are willing to provide. At no time, does being or seeking a sugarbaby imply or require unprotected sexual activities. At no time does being a sb require you to be "on call" 24/7. You set the conditions. You do set up a coffee/lunch meeting before anything else. See if you are both clear about expectattions, and if your expectations are realistic. An experienced or serious sd knows that the arrangement will run him into the thousands. Be realistic about what your real expenses are, if the idea is that you do not have to work at all, you will have to include extra expenses such as shopping, transit, food, entertainment. But make no mistake. Being a sb does not make you better than being an escort. You are still getting paid for your companionship and sexual favours. You would be no different than an sp, excepting the number of different people seen. He is, at the end of the day, a client, even if he is your only client, and you need to have a professional approach to the entire situation. The reason many sps do not like the arrangement is often because being an sp means choosing who you see when you want to see them. Also, if the arrangement ends, whch it will, they are without any regs, without any income, starting all over. They will have lost their regular clients by becoming exclusive. Another thing is that the sd is just as likely as anyone else to have financial dificulties, fail to make the monthly payment, and leaves her without anything to cover her expenses. I sometimes think that the # 1 reason a client wants this arrangement is to isolate the sp from others, to make her financially dependent upon just him, then pull out when she least expects it leaving her even more vulnerable. Which is a great reason to stay independent, see multiple clients, and do not rely on one person to pay your way. You could find the same success by setting up 5 or 6 regular weekly clients, get the amounts you need, spend less time with each individual, and if one backs out, you still have the others as backup. Then you would only need to replace one.

Typically, places that have escort licenses as part of city bylaws, issue fines. I think you will find that a hefty fine, and interrupting the sps ability to work that evening, or week, can be more of a deterrant than an unlikely jail sentence for the same offense. You always want to hit people where it really hurts: in their wallets. In Edmonton, the independent escort license is say $2000. The typical fine when the bylaws run a sting to catch unlicensed sps is about $2000. Hit her once, and she will think twice about not just paying for a a license.:mad: right. The license # is supposed to be in their ads, so it is pretty easy to find the unlicensed ones.

I have seen a few PE guys, and we have found the best way to deal with it is with hj sessions. Also, repeat visits with the same sp. A lot of seeing an sp is heightened stress or anxiety anyway, so repeat visits really set a more comfortable atmosphere. In addition, as mentioned, a real hands off approach, stimulation of all the senses and rest of the body. Also that builds up anticipation, but without a physical touch, that is all that happens. I find the hj is much easier to control speed, friction, and pressure. It is often better to keep a feather touch, brief, slow and more of a circular, massage motion, and avoid a firm grip with a jack hammer up and down squeeze. Stop and start and stop again; distract with some talk, or by doing something different. For PE the best position is to lay on the back; anything else can speed up things. Usually it is better to start slow as the finishing touch will still be faster than average, but the journey there is most important and should be memorable. Eventually, with one regular visitor, we started to go for 2 shots. Initially, we thought about it, but like many others after the first one, he is up and ready to leave without even attempting #2. So the entire visit is very short and results in not even having the massage, which is a key part of the arousal process. a quick cum can be less satisfying, if the pleasure and arousal prior to it is not long as well.

This is a long thread, but I did have a couple of thoughts. A guy can post a thread with a title that leaves out the "Best Of". and simply make it an invitation for the ladies to participate. On a site I used to visit, a fella would post a thread with an inviting title like "Show your assets, ladies", but not take her pics to post. As a potential advertising boost, plus a fun and flirty way to participate, any sp who wants to would pick the picture she wants and posts it. There were weekly threads, and the bump post would still only be a comment from a guy, the picture posting was entirely done by the sps. He could always quote the picture, but I don't know of anyone taking pics from the sps album and posting that way. Maybe copying a pic from her posted recent ad, but not out of the albums. I always would assume the album pics are there for reference, and for member access but if she didn't put them herself in a public ad, that is for a reason. So a theme thread of "Legs for Daze" or "Friday is Hooters Day", etc, and just leave the Best of in the eyes of the beholder.

Extended foreplay is really important. As said, it is what it is and it is clocked at anywhere from 7 to 14 minutes, so if they (or the oP) is planning that the half hour session should consist of insert, thrust, and hope he lasts for 25 minutes doing that, well it completely misses the point lol. I do a lot of half hours, and no one feels rushed or as tho they are missing out on anything, even tho the majority are like most men where the fs portion lasts, even with changes, around 5 minutes. Tips on the half hour: Start with foreplay and/or massage. My massage is erotic, teasing and stimulating. The purpose it to arouse without that arousal focusing on orgasm until switching over to fs. Within the foreplay is 69, which can distract the guy enough to enjoy without falling over into cumming in this position (most of the time). It also relaxes the body and mind from the stress, anxiety, over anticipation and excitement of just being there. Those thngs can also lead to early release. If you go right to action, like a bj, chances are really high he cums there, and has no chance for a 2nd or for the fs he came for. If someone is quick to cum, do not move into doggie or mish, stay in CG. If time is running out on the half hour, switch up to a doggie or standing doggie.

Many of the Falle comments just made no sense. Other comments were simply insulting from the assumption that the majority of sex workers are pretty much too stupid to do anything else. You know, the comments I have seen from the worst of the online client/review board member, is pretty much exactly the same kind of contempt as these socalled former sex workers who are supposedly trying to "help" sps.

If you are new to outcall, but have done incall, and you just want to get the outcall experience successfully accomplished, just book an appt with someone you have already seen. And if you haven't seen anyone before, then just consider doing an incall with whoever, agency or indy. The main thing with indys is that you speak with her directly, she is the one to confirm and agree to the appt time, and she is the one responsible if she doesn't show up (or at least call). If there is something odd about your location or set up, I think she would let you know the address info doesn't work for her? Kind of agree with the longer appt making it harder, tho I figured out that you thought after your first attempt, it would increase the chance of someone showing up lol. Why not book an hour and ask at that time how easy it is to extend appts, and suggest if the sp is agreeable, you would like to go for 2hrs.