The replies to this post contain a lot of good information and advice. I tried putting some of the advice into practice, and I thought I would update this post with the results.
My most recent experience was with an MPA who had just started in the business only 3 weeks prior to my visit (I did not know this when I picked her). Understandably, she was very tentative and seemed to rely on me to take the initiative to signal to her when things should progress beyond the normal massage. She seemed to take the same approach with respect to conversation. We hardly spoke at all for the first half of the session, as has been the pattern for most of my massage sessions. Shortly after the turn, I took some of the advice I had been given and tried to engage her in conversation by asking her by herself, while trying to adhere to the suggestions given not to be too intrusive or too personal. Suddenly she opened up and started telling me all about herself.
I don't remember what I had asked, but it was as if I had turned a key in a door and the door was now wide open. I don't think that it was the content of my questions which triggered her reaction, but simply the fact that I had demonstrated that I wanted to talk and that I was interested in getting to know her better. She talked about where she had grown up, where she had lived before, how she came to live in Montreal. She mentioned her father, mother and sister, etc. She volunteered all this information without me having asked about any of it. And she asked me some of the same questions - where I was from, what part of town I live in, etc. She was so easy to talk to and I felt totally comfortable talking to her. In fact, as a testament to how well things went, she told ME at the end of our session that I was easy to talk to. This is something I have very rarely been told, and it demonstrates the extent to which SHE was easy to talk to, so much so that she was able to make even me feel at ease and completely comfortable in carrying on a free-flowing conversation with a gorgeous 23-year old while we were both in the nude. At the end of the session she sat on the massage table and we just talked. This has never happened to me before at a massage session. This was by far the best session I have had from the point of view of a conversational connection.
Following this experience and after reviewing the advice given in this post, below is a summary of some of the conclusions I have come to with respect to the guidelines for an introvert, like myself, to follow if one is interested in establishing a conversational connection with an MPA. These may also apply to an SP, but I reserve judgment since I have not yet visited any SPs). Since these guidelines are based on my VERY limited experience with MPAs, I would appreciate any feedback or any comments anyone may have on these guidelines:
1. Select an MPA whose reviews indicate that she is very friendly, personable and easy to talk to.
2. Select an MPA whose reviews indicate that she has less restrictions. (This guideline is based on my limited experience which seems to indicate that those MPAs who are more open sexually are also more open conversationally).
3. Even though you have selected an MPA who is easy to talk to you still need to initiate the conversation in order to show her that you are interested in talking and that you are interested in getting to know her better.
4. When asking questions, while trying to show that you are interested in conversation and in getting to know her better, you still need to ensure that you do NOT ask questions that are too intrusive or personal. (Note: This is not always easy to do and does take some self-discipline. For example, when the MPA told me she had lived in the States prior to coming to Montreal, I thought of asking what she did there, but I restrained myself from doing so. She herself volunteered this information later in the conversation, without me asking).
5. If the MPA volunteers a lot of personal information about herself without you asking, you have more leeway to ask her some personal questions, but still within limits. For example, if she tells you about her father, mother and sister, it may be OK at that point to ask her when you entered the business, but it would NOT be proper to ask her if her parents knew what she did, and how they felt about it.
6. Even though all of the above guidelines are followed, personal chemistry still needs to exist between yourself and the MPA in order to be able establish a rapport. If the chemistry is not there it will not work, and it is nobody's fault. Everybody is different. If this happens, don't blame anyone, just move on and try to find an MPA with whom the personal chemistry is better.
7. There is one guideline which I used to follow, but which, following my most recent massage session, I will now remove - ie. I used to exclude MPAs that are I knew were new to the business, on the assumption that they, being new, would be more restrained in all aspects, including conversationally, during the session. However, now that my best session conversationally was with an MPA who only started in the business 3 weeks ago, I will remove this guideline. The underlying assumption may still apply in some cases, but my most recent session shows that this guideline is too restrictive, and the risk of following this guideline is that I may miss out on meeting some wonderfully personable MPAs.
Thanks for all the advice contained in the previous replies to this post, and I look forward to reading any additional feedback or comments anyone may have on this topic.
