Old Dog

In other news... did you know that a squirrel has tiny hooks on the end of his penis?

Hmmmm... one less thing to do in the morning..... I am in!!! Of course with my limited facial hair, I will appear to be a homeless person.

(1) Oh GOD.... please let her have bacon. (2) Hmmmm.... Maybe I should have warned her about the unicorn cosplay. (3) Why did I wear this thong?

My friend... there are soooo many different and wonderful women in the Ottawa area. Recommending one or another that has captivated one of us may or may not do the trick for you. CERB is a recommendation board... so here is a recommendation: Find a lady...read her ads, read her recos.... take the plunge. You'll be nervous as hell before you get started but I GUARANTEE that all that will vanish when you contact a really great provider. Without knowing what you want, who you are into or what your price point is, there is really nothing we can say other than... "Go get em tiger!"

Happy belated Pete... I have to pay more attention!!!

The throne speech. Bedford is going to be TOUGH. The cons are going to fight it tooth and nail.

Just paid.... bwahahahahahahah. Now I have time to make up a great sick day excuse for December 13th.....

Been there. Done that. There were times that I loved being married. It was a nice feeling to be a part of something special. The problem was that it takes two to tango and marriage is like an old car.... it takes a LOT of work to keep it going smoothly. Unlike the old car, you absolutely need both parties working together to make it both work and be rewarding. Since the marriage, I've nearly been married again three times.... but something inside just SCREAMED "get the fuck out, NOW." I'm still friends with two of the three... and I am glad that we salvaged a distant love. I can't say that about the ex-wife... BUT then again, neither of us was or is perfect and we were too young and idealistic to see that our incompatibilities were insurmountable. Would I do it again? You never know. I am not averse to the idea BUT then again, I do like the life I lead at this moment. It's rather fun not being accountable to anyone else but yourself....

WHAAAAAAAAAT????????????? OMG I missed this milestone. I knew you were prolific (and hot) but I had no idea you were this prolific (I did know that you are HOT so ...ummmm.... points for me!) Congrats to you my dear sweet (uber HOT) friend.... xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Couldn't have said it better. Breaking Bad KNEW when it was time to end... I just wish True Blood had come to the same conclusion a season or so ago...

Love this. I saw they were doing a lot of research on rebuilding damaged heart tissue with stem cells - there's hope for me yet!

DVD box set of Breaking Bad??? Everything will be packaged in a big money barrel on November 26th for $209 US.... http://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Bad-Complete-UltraViolet-Digital/dp/B00EEDNA4M

100 posts in less than a month... Jeebus... you are a machine!!!!

Teasing with a feather... the dog may snap at you if you tease him with your fingers. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh you mean.... never mind. Pizza with or without howler monkeys????

OMG!!!!!!!!!! How did I miss it!!!! Hmmmmm.... to make up for my badness you may have to come over and spank me..... xoxoxoxxo Happy belated birthday chica!!!!!

I have had messages from some of my favourite people in the world today... and they just made a Friday even better. Lunch with a friend that just moved back to Ottawa... texts from loved ones... great times all around. Life is good!

I had to cut back because of the cholesterol. That recipe is for a "lite" bacon sandwich.

45. Howler Monkeys Seriously. Don't bring them along to your appointment as a fetish thing. They are called howler monkeys for a reason. They howl. Lots. Try maintaining a boner with a howler monkey critiquing your best moves. Can't. Be. Done. Plus they poop. Lots. And they aren't satisfying just pooping. They fling it about. It's rather disconcerting. Oh. And just try to find a bag of Purina Howler Monkey Chow. Apparently Ottawa is not big enough to justify keeping it in stock. I tell ya, I won't make that mistake a third time. 46. Cannibalism When she says, "eat me," it's an expression to satisfy her orally. It's not an invitation to run to the fridge for tomatoes, lettuce and mayonnaise. Not everything you hear is literal. Hopefully you can figure that out. Say no to cannibalism. 47. (This number is reserved for future use.) I couldn't think of anything to write, so I just made this look official. I wanted to say something about bacon and boobies and brassieres and bums and bar mitzvahs and Barry Manilow and Barbapapa and Bananarama and beef and beans and other words that start with b, but I couldn't think of anything that made sense so I um.... just used a government trick that never works. I apologize.

Going to a website yesterday and seeing that Donna Douglas just turned 80. Who is Donna Douglas, you ask? Elly Mae Clampett from the Beverly Hillbillies. Beautiful HOT Elly Mae Clampett who wore short shorts and had big bazooms and curly blonde hair and inspired many a young boner when this Old Dog was a pup.

Big Bacon Free Sandwich? BLASPHEMY. A pox upon them. Oh. You meant something else. Ummmm, don't ask for that. Or sandwiches without bacon. Cretins.

32 slices of bacon between 64 slices of bacon.

Perfect choice Gabi!!!! 7 Oaks is one of the house reds at the Keg and goes well with almost everything... at around $20 a bottle it's a really great wine at a great price. Keeping with robust reds try some Italian - Amarone, Ripasso and Valpolicella all hail from the same region, deliver a delicious blend of flavours and can all be had from the modest $20 -40 range for a decent bottle. For French reds I absolutely adore Chateauneuf du Pape... again a decent bottle will set you back $30 and up BUT the flavour justifies the small investment....

I know the answer to this!!!!!!!!!!! They are big pooheads. Carry on.

Thanks to da boys for putting together an amazing event. Spud, MisterT, Skater... you guys rock!!!! I love these events. Ottawa has a great community that seems to never stop growing - we had a mix of familiar and new faces all blended together in a fantastic location. Such a fantastic opportunity to mix and mingle with the loveliest women in the land and the nicest guys - what more could you ask for? I always look forward to these things... can't wait for the Christmas one!!