Old Dog

Question: What do you call it when you get attitude from your iPhone? Answer: Wankel Rotary Engine

Question: Name three pubic hairs. Answer: Marcel Marceau

mmmmmmmmm.... shiny. I like shiny.

I do.... this lady was wearing all of them!!!

I have to agree with Angela. At best this is a vent, at worst we are stirring a pot of animosity. Let's all just hug, naked.

Question: Name Rupert Murdoch's fan base. Answer: Tsetse flies.

Congrats SA!!! I was going to give ya a whole box of chocolates but I ate some....

Question: Name a creature created entirely from spare parts. Answer: Morgan Freeman

I think that invisible sign that you have is called CHARISMA. It comes in all forms and in all sizes. You could have the most beautiful person in the room beside you but if they lack charisma, the beauty is gone to waste. You get stares because you exude something that people want... they want to be near you, they want to be with you. It has little or nothing to do with what you do, what you wear or your surroundings. We all know a person or two that just draw people about them. You can't explain it... but there it is. It's not a bad thing... don't fight it!!

Question: Name one of the acceptable ingredients in a traditional Christmas Fruitcake. Answer: Marlon Brando

Soleil... what can I say about Soleil? I love the fact that we connected from the instant we first spoke and that by the time I first met her at one of the CERB socials, it felt like I was hugging an old friend. Love her to pieces!

Apparently you are the only one looking with lust in your eyes....

No need. Just give them to the big hairy guy with the chainsaw when you send him on his way.

Question: What is the opposite of "livin' la vita not so loca?" Answer: Horace Greeley

Hmmmm. Things that turn me off when seeing an SP. Chainsaws. Chainsaws are bad. Big hairy men in the living room. Big hairy men are a bit of a turn off. Big hairy men carrying chainsaws are bad too. Evidence of ritual sacrifice. Especially when a big hairy man is wearing some sort of talisman and is eyeing me as "next." Rabid house pets. Oranges. They scare me. I have no reason to fear them, but they scare me. Celine Dion posters. Hobbit feet. If you have abnormally large hairy feet, please let me know before the appointment. Anything stored in formaldehyde. The undead. "Mein Kampf" Bottles of horse tranquilizers. A supply of body bags. Barry Manilow CDs. Livestock.

Question: Name someone who was not a member of the Beatles. Answer: Live Long and Prosper

... you do absolutely nothing for a day and feel absolutely no guilt?

Question: What the fuck was that? Answer: Loudon Wainwright III

You know you are old when... 1. All of the bands that you listened to as kids have members that could qualify for CPP and the Old Age Supplement. 2. That hot chick that you lusted after in high school is now a grandmother. 3. You need a nap before looking at porn. 4. You consider getting out of bed, out of a chair or off the couch as exercise. 5. Your eyebrow hair has taken on a new life and direction of its own. 6. You can remember a time when there was only one vampire. 7. Your kids laugh at all the movies that scared you.

Star Wars.... hmmm.... I never knew that the Empire was using giant cats....

Question: What do you do if you are really freaking mad at your neighbour, Mr Ardier? Answer: Wash your hands.

Name someone whose name rhymes with Chester P Schmearson? Love handles.

Grats!!!

Congrats gorgeous!