Old Dog

Ironically that is what the ex Mrs Old Dog thought too....

I was going to suggest a "stupid answers to dumb questions" section. I would be an expert.... then Angela got all serious offering real advice to sincere questions. Stole my thunder. Geez.

so.... if you get an erection that lasts more than four hours from watermelon, do you go to emergency or to the grocery store?

... a shower is the best place to get clean... the tub is a really good place to get dirty....

Hmmm... what do I find attractive in the opposite sex? First and foremost the discernible absence of a penis. Other than that? Self confidence. The sexiest women in the world know who "they" are. They are real. Comfortable in their own skin. Aware of their shortcomings but don't give a damn. If they are hungry, they will eat a steak and then order dessert without guilt. They aren't afraid to frighten men with their intelligence. They aren't afraid to tell a dirty joke and get a laugh. They are who they are because that is what they want to be. Nothing more, nothing less.... and dead sexy. Ummmm... oh yeah. Boobs.

You know Carrie... I was just completely out of material... I needed to recharge! xo

Ohhhhh just a few..... Anal (Dodge) Dart Anal (Plymouth) Fury Anal (Plymouth) Valiant Anal (Dodge) Duster Anal (Dodge) Challenger Anal (Dodge) Scamp Anal (Chrysler) Reliant Anal (Pontiac) Tracker Anal Light Duty Anal Heavy Duty Anal (Nissan) Pathfindinder Anal (Eagle) Legacy Anal Hummer Anal (Triumph) Spitfire Anal (MG) Midget Anal (Eagle) Talon Anal (Honda) Fit Would it be bad to have an Anal Dump Truck?

Geee and I was thinking this was going to be a hot story about a waitress .....

I think I can free up that evening... I am in!

Awww thanks so much everybody!!!!! It is really wonderful having a community of friends!

... and who can forget.... "Every Sperm is Sacred!!!???!!!"

Happppppy burfday Beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy burfday Jazz man!!!

In the immortal words of Forrest Gump, "Shit Happens." It wasn't malicious, it was an accident. It's like the first door ding on your new or newish car. The little scratch on the screen of your iPod, iPhone or Blackberry. That mark on your carpet where someone accidentally spilled their wine. It makes you angry but you accept it... it's not worth mentioning because (1) it can't be undone (2) it wasn't intentional and (3) in the grander scheme of life in general, it doesn't really matter. Just my two cents...

Alllllllll righty then..... Nollaig Chridheil Huibh!!!!!!!!! and Bliadhna Mhath Ur!!!!

Way too many ladies to mention Pete??? How about the poor server? Hell, if you made a list we would crash. Why is CERB so damn slow today they would say.... and the answer?? Shit, Pete's 2010 list is STILL loading!!!!!! Highlights for this Old Dog? Gotta say I think I made my best decision ever when I joined. Met so many fantastic peeps that I have grown to love... cheers to all of you!

Now you tell me. Mind you it wasn't so bad. I discovered that when everyone gets rip roaring tipsy, many of our inhibitions disappear. That's a good thing. I was able to go to work on the following Monday with only a trace of alcohol remaining in my system from Friday. My very attractive 30 something boss did booty grind me vigorously, so I can't be responsible for the fact that I didn't move when it started. I have a new fondness for my boss. The new girl from Montreal did give me her phone number and said that she would cook me breakfast. I have a new fondness for the new girl. The recently divorced west coast girl likes to hug. I like the recently divorced west coast girl, she smells nice. The hot Asian girl told me in no uncertain terms that she had yet to find a man that could satisfy her orally. Then she smiled. Then she winked. I like the smiling, winking, hot Asian girl. Now if only I remembered the lampshade trick....

Ohhhhhh .... Christmas. So many things. For me it's the whole package... it's nothing and everything at the same time. It's hearing Perry Como singing "Home for the Holidays" while I am driving home for the holidays... It's watching the snow come down and Johnny Mathis is singing "Silver Bells"... It's sitting around with family and hearing Andy Williams singing "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year".... It's making Christmas cookies and having Nat King Cole sing "The Christmas Song" (Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...)... It's sitting with friends and watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and everybody knows the complete dialogue.... It's Christmas eve and knowing "A Christmas Carol" will be on, with Alistair Sim as Scrooge... It's sitting with friends, sharing some festive cheer and knowing that each of them feels strangely warmer because I have the Fireplace Channel on TV... It's staring at the tree and getting hypnotized by the lights... It's the time of year that I have clear images of all of my family and friends, many long gone, and can see the absolute joy that the season brought them... To me, Christmas is a series of vignettes, like pieces of a quilt that you construct all of your life. No two quilts are exactly the same but all of them are precious.

Ohhhh I have a few!!! The original "Death at a Funeral"... not the horrid US remake... a brilliant UK cast makes this comedy work. Joyeux Noel... the story of one Christmas in the trenches where everyone just stopped fighting and shared a night of peace. The Legend of 1900... Tim Roth plays a man born on a ship, and never sets foot on dry land or does he? Omagh ... A gritty piece about the innocent victims of terrorism, told by someone who may have supported the cause. Young @ Heart ... it's a documentary about seniors that perform classic rock every year. I guarantee that you will not watch with dry eyes. Gregory's Girl ... A wee Scots comedy from the 80's... nothing wacky, just the awkward experiences of a boy trying to get a girl The Name of the Rose ... Sean Connery as a monk in the movie of the Umberto Eco novel. Not a small movie, but maybe forgotten. Breaker Morant .... a classic tale of Aussie soldiers betrayed by the Brits in command during the Boer War. Gallipoli ... same as above, only this time in WWI Talk to Her... the Oscar winner for best foreign picture, it's about a woman in a coma and the men that love her. Brotherhood of the Wolf ... think of the Matrix but set it back 250 years. Malena ... Monica Bellucci in the role of a woman scorned by her town because of her beauty.

True nuff!!!!!!! There can be no party without the three of you!!!!!!!!

My friend on FB had this as her new profile pic....

Civ and AOE/AOM??? Love dat!!!! Got CIV for the PS3 .... and a few others.... gotta love geeks! Oh and just for fun... the new Vajayjay hero!!!

Damn. That's what I was going to say.

The Changeling!!! I am so glad that I am not the only one that remembers this fine CANADIAN movie. It was as spooky as all get out!!!! The Others with Nicole Kidman.... there is one that will get ya thinking!!! The Ghost and Mr. Chicken!!! ... okay it is a goofy Don Knotts comedy, but when the blood stained organ started playing... it scared the poop outta me when I was a kid!

Best political sign I have seen in years!!!!!