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Old Dog

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Everything posted by Old Dog

  1. Great Thread! At 28... here's Hayley Atwell... at 35, here's Christina Hendricks... At 46, here is Monica Bellucci.... At 54, here's Sela Ward... After 60??? There is only one.... Sophia.... not quite the same at 76... but memorable nonetheless
  2. Manilow is richer than God... but when I met him he was in between times in his career. I met him in 91... he came in to Toronto behind a whole bunch of Portuguese people on a flight. He rushed to the front of the line and proclaimed, "excuse me, do you know who I am???" My colleague, the most sagacious man I ever met, looked up over his glasses and said quietly, " I know who you WERE.... but these people were here first." Manilow shrunk back and was as quiet as a church mouse.
  3. Reese... NEVER!!!! There are scads of skills left... Ninja stuff.... come on...
  4. It was graduation night.. high school. Back in the days of steam ships, telegraphs and talkies. Okay... not so far back. It was the tradition that the young men on the student council and all the team captains of all the sports teams camped out on grad night on the front steps of the school. Now the school I attended was built in the late 1800's, a massive edifice and a tribute to the Scottish masons of the area. It was a magnificent structure. The front steps were enclosed in a large arch and were about 10 metres wide and 20 metres deep. We were there. We were drunk. Fortunately, with equal rights, much of the female representation on student council and school athletic captains were also there. Which was a very good thing... because besides being there and drunk, we were horny. Well, as the evening progressed a lovely young lady and I decided it was time to initiate the front steps of our hallowed school by a wonderful session of steamy high school awkward sex. Didn't matter (at the time) who was watching. We were hot for each other. None of us had thought that school board had security patrols monitoring properties at night... which was extremely unfortunate. I experienced my first case of high schoolus frontus steppus coitus interuptus, followed quickly by the worst case of testiculus enormous painus. That was a tad indiscrete....
  5. The VERY first celebrity I met, I was about 11. My buddy was a great all around athlete and played on the local all star hockey team. We went to see his team play Brantford in an All Star match. Mark (my buddy) scored 3 goals and would have been the star of the game if not for... Wayne Gretzky. Wayne scored 14 goals for Brantford as an 11 year old and made our boys look like toddlers. He was that good even as a kid.
  6. Now the early eighties would have been nothing without covers.... Tainted Love/Where did our Love go? by Soft Cell, originally done by Gloria Jones/The Supremes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srtuQU20QXA (There's) Always Something There to Remind Me by Naked Eyes, originally done by Dionne Warwick http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtPKa7MXLfA Tears of a Clown by The English Beat, originally done by Smokey Robinson and the Miracles Suspicious Minds by Fine Young Cannibals, the original done by Elvis! Dancin' in the Street by Van Halen, originally by Martha and the Vandellas... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtZvpwJvRr4 Cum on Feel the Noize by Quiet Riot, originally by Slade And finally... Smokin' in the Boys Room by Motley Crue, originally by Brownsville Station
  7. He thought he was "all that and a bag o' chips"... mind you so did Manilow!
  8. It's not really fair, but I met a ton of people when I worked at Pearson airport. The not fair part??? They HAD to deal with me. Actors? Nicole Kidman, Tom Cruise, Sean Bean, Sean Astin, George Carlin, Whoopi Goldberg, Renee Zellwegger, Lucy Liu, Catherine Zeta Jones, Richard Gere, Jackie Chan, Heather Graham, Rosario Dawson, Zoe Saldana, Kim Basinger, Bette Midler, Ann B Davis (Alice from the Brady Bunch), Mischa Barton, Helen Hunt Singers/Musicians? Barry Manilow, the Pussycat Dolls, Carlos Santana, The Beach Boys, Tiny Tim, Rod Stewart, Bill Wyman, The Byrds, Ringo Starr, The Who, Gene Loves Jezebel, Nirvana, Burt Bacharach, Yes, Mariah Carey, Depeche Mode, Itzak Perlman, Yo yo Ma...ohhhh and Michael Bolton (dickhead extraordinaire!) Sports? The Leafs, the Jays and the Raptors... all the time. Jean Beliveau, Bobby Hull, Bobby Orr, Frank Mahovilich and Gordie Howie. Tons of others from visiting teams... Charles Barkley was my fave! WWF/WWE wrestlers by the ton!!! Lots of others... they will eventually come to mind....
  9. So... this afternoon I went through the annual HELL of preparing my own personal learning plan for work. If you have ever been a public servant or have known one, I am sure that you have gone through this ... essentially you have to identify skills, courses and other sundry and inane things that would enhance your value in both a personal and professional manner.... So I started.... 1. Effective writing. Okay. Ummm. I know how to write, just sometimes I have to remove the smartass from the documents I prepare for directors, directors general and vice presidents. I recall a document that I prepared and revised 17 times for one Director General.... she kept on wanting more and more detail. I added a history of pants, a history of medieval siege weapons and an entire section on people named Dave. She reverted to revision 3 as her final document. then I thought... hmmm... what skills would I really like to have???? So I continued. 2. Jedi mind tricks. Remember that scene in Star Wars where Darth Vader squeezes that guy's throat with his mind??? I want that mad skill. Think of it. Cute girl... stare at her... MINDGASM. Asshole in the next cubicle... stare at him... instant poopy pants. Teller at bank... stare at her... MINDGASM and a stack of c notes. (I really like the MINDGASM part) 3. Bagpipe lessons. Is there a more annoying instrument in the world??? I love my heritage, and some of the tunes on the pipes are haunting and beautiful BUT... wouldn't you just love to accompany KISS doing "Detroit Rock City" on the pipes??? I know I would. 4. The ability to morph and teleport. Okay. It is kind of a crazy tandem of skills, but think about it. Sometimes you have gas. You could let one fly, disappear and reappear as someone else. The guy closest to your original position would get blamed BUT you would feel the relief. That is a skill worth having. You could make it up to everyone by giving them all mindgasms. 5. The ability to stop time. You are running late for work and have an assignment due almost instantaneously when you get in. Take your time... you have like forever. Stop time... take a nap, shower... eat... write a fantastic assignment and show up in the nick of time with a killer report. When you restart time, give your boss a mindgasm. 6. A vibrating penis. No need for mindgasms. 7. Mind reading. Not that fake psychic stuff, I mean REAL mind reading. "Hmmmm... I wonder if I have a chance???" and in her mind..."he is really kind of sweet." Then you stare and release the mindgasm.... alright... your turn..... Additional Comments: One more power... the ability to edit the title after you hit send....
  10. I may just have to do some voluntary yard work at Dorinda's place....
  11. Congrats Spike and in keeping with the avatars... Cujos to you!!!
  12. A few gems... Bird and the Bee doing Hall & Oates "Kiss on my List" and again doing "Rich Girl" Johnny Cash doing Depeche Mode's "Personal Jesus" Devo doing the Rolling Stones "Satisfaction" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e75BUYdZq-g Gary Jules doing Tears for Fears "Mad World" Kate Bush doing Elton John's "Rocket Man" Elvis Costello doing Burt Bacharach's "I'll Never Fall in Love Again" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xC6z2tYr3-U and finally... Will Ferrell and John C Reilly doing Andrea Bocelli's "Por Ti Volare"
  13. I live by the credo, "work is work and home is home." I do not bring home stress to work and I leave all the work stuff at the office. It is easier said than done but... it works well. I used to have a 75-80 km commute each way to work and found that time was the best for releasing any pent up stress... not in a road rage way, but the music and the solitude. I was forced to concentrate on the road and as such, my mind would change gears... by the time I arrived at my destination I was good to go. Ohhhhh yeah.... naps work well.... nothing like a nap to change the whole outlook on a day!
  14. But we can still maintain the rumour that you are an alien, right?
  15. Congrats Megan... just made it there myself this weekend with Spike!
  16. Hey!!!! I have had a haircut since this was taken... and I am using a better quality paint that really makes my blue eyes "pop"
  17. Spike... I was down with ya on Thursday/Friday... had a gall bladder attack from hell. I am hopeful that it was a portend for the future, preparing me for all the rich meals I am going to subject myself to with a Lotto Max win... And Angela... the HST??? I may just round it up to $10 and skim some off the top for Dalton and the boys....
  18. Antlerman... I am in agreement. I can feel the simulated pain in my face as that massive behind slams into the guys nose....
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