Old Dog

You might want to switch over to Gmail.... if hotmail is kaput, it's probably your best option.

Move over Vitto.... I'm snuggling in there beside you!!!!

Getting inside my front door and immediately stripping down to the boxers and a T-shirt after coming home from work. It's like a complete shedding of all work related activity and a transformation into domestic slothfulness.

I love a little furry patch!!! It's such a nice surprise. I think for some of the guys that came of age in the 70's, 80's and early 90's, the magic began when you saw that tiny patch of hair emerging from the top of the panties as they began to descend.... it was one of those glorious instances when you knew that something wonderful was about to happen. Ohhhh the memories and those destined to become memories....

I'm hotmail/outlook... and the stuff isn't even getting to the "Junk" mail folder. It's full on not receiving.

Cuts down on dishes. We can fry the bacon up right on the stove and the grease drains down into the fire making it even hotter and the bacon gets done quicker. We may not be the best looking providers but dammit we're pretty smart sometimes....

I won't let anyone touch my GI Joes. Dammit they're MINE!!!!

I woke up today and for the first time in months I am not sick to my stomach. There's a little stiffness and a little soreness at the incision sites BUT that will go away. I look at the bill I received for all the medical attention and it came up to whopping $3.21... and that's for the painkillers that I am taking for the soreness. We can bitch all we want about the Canadian healthcare system but this morning and every morning that I wake up NOT in pain I thank goodness that we live in a country that let's you heal without the overwhelming financial burden of dealing with getting better. I am so thankful for the support and well wishes I have received from family and friends inside and outside this community. My bestie is still sleeping; she stayed up with me half the night to make sure I was feeling okay (which I was and am)... and so for brunch I am going to make her something special that we are going to share... BACON and eggs!!!!

I'm in the same boat. It used to be PMs automatically and updates every morning at 3:14 am. I haven't had anything since January 12th.

Thanks so much for all the kind words and wonderful wishes! As most of you are aware, my BEST present today was a visit to the Civic hospital in Ottawa where a beautiful surgeon (and I do mean that, she not only is talented but she is also a hottie) and her team extracted my gallbladder and the evil gallstone that it encompassed. It was bigger than we first thought... 3.6 cms around and 6cms long!!!! Even better??? My best friend in the world drove me to the hospital, picked me up from hospital, got me dinner and is staying the night to make sure that I am safe. She is one of our own. I won't mention her by name but I am so blessed to have her in my life, she makes my recovery worthwhile!!! Bless you hun... love ya to pieces. Some of you know of whom I am speaking... and many of you know her well. She is my rock!

Puppies are cute and fun and warm and exciting and at the same time, there's nothing like the companionship, comfort and love provided by a good old dog. Everybody has their own merits and everyone of us has their own preferences. The best providers are not defined by age but by the way you feel as you walk out the door after your encounter. Those are the encounters that have met all of your expectations and more... and make you want to repeat those moments eternally in your mind and once again with that provider. There's no magic formula - it's pure chemistry and if age is one of your key ingredients, so be it. It's different for everyone.

Had a lovely evening last night with some of my friends knowing that it was the perfect opportunity to see me drunk and silly (and pantless) prior to my birthday/surgery combo tomorrow. That led to being invited to another lovely dinner tonight with a couple of former CERB member/providers (not so pantless) .... It has been a great pre-birthday weekend that ends tomorrow with the removal of the gall bladder... a pleasant present in disguise!!!!

Okay... the Kraken comment was as a DIRECT RESULT of a conversation held with Malika, Veronica Lodge and Phaedrus on Twitter and later on FB with the former SaraMQ. Malika was the originator and did declare the single Kraken outburst rule. Let's be perfectly clear on that. Malika was watching videos about gigantic Japanese squid and that was the impetus for the whole conversation. Please give ALL necessary kudos to Malika. Do not under any circumstances refer to the rule at the Malikraken rule, unless she says so. Then give her credit for that... even though I just made up that name too. I'm that kinda giving.

Happy 22nd b-day Vitto!!!!!!!!!! xoxoxoxoxo

It's ironic that in the interview yesterday with Evan Solomon on CBC, Tom Mulcair did not mention consultation with sex workers - he only mentioned police, social and welfare community groups, and health workers. I was rather dumbfounded by the statement (which he has apparently augmented.) First and foremost the government at all levels (federal, provincial and municipal) should be engaged with sex workers to hammer out a feasible solution to the law making process. All levels of government will have to be involved - municipal licensing, and zoning will have to be considered, provincial healthcare, taxes and social welfare offices will have to be involved and federal stakeholders including public safety, immigration, aboriginal affairs, justice, health, status of women, etc will all have to have their say. Mulcair did make a great point yesterday though. He stated that the federal government should have anticipated at least the possibility of the criminal code provisions being struck down by the Supreme Court and to that end, should have begun the consultation process well in advance of the actual decision. Kudos for that statement.

Hmmmm.... is there another way of speaking that I don't know about??? Bwahahahahahahhahaha!!!!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... tales that can be told. Can anyone honestly say that they got a bj that they didn't enjoy???

3.6 kgs is not enough for more than one person!!!!

Hmmmmm.... Lee-Anne Liebenberg as Viper in Doomsday She's badass as a crazed killer but scrub off all the makeup... she's WOW. Danaerys Targaryen.... she's HOT, she has dragons, and she's... ummmm, did I say HOT??? And as a buddy??? No one could beat having Tyrion Lannister or Jeff Spicoli as a wing man

Hmmmmm... 5 ft is good, and so is 6.... accccck.... nose to nose and toes to toes.... 5 ft... it's concentrated fun. Jennifer Garner or Jennifer Grey?

Ohhhhh lots of memories.... New Wave... Duran Duran, Blancmange, China Crisis, Frankie Goes To Hollywood, WHAM!, Howard Jones, Nik Kershaw, The Thompson Twins, Bananarama, Cyndi Lauper, Big Country, Talk Talk, Love & Rockets, General Public, Fine Young Cannibals, Billy Idol, OMD, Ultravox, New Order, Bronski Beat, The Communards, Berlin, Missing Persons, XTC, Yaz.... so many great bands... Talk shows -Sally Jessie Raphael, Phil Donahue Cable boxes with wires.... Milk crates full of LPs Deck shoes and men's canvas shoes with gel soles Acid washed denim ensembles

Ooooooooooh I GOT one. That prostitution is the world's oldest profession. Nope. The first guy that had to pay had the first profession. He was a mammoth hunter, or a flint sharpener or a Visigoth mercenary or a saber toothed tiger trainer or something like that. Somebody had to have the money to pay the first SP. What probably is more accurate is that prostitution is the oldest CONTINUOUS profession. Glad I cleared that up for you. Carry on.

Good GOD. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. What Lee said.

Ohhhh wait... there are more rules. 16. At no point should you say this: "Hey, I have a Great Dane and a fresh jar of peanut butter." 17. Rule # 16 still applies even though your fantasy involves cosplay as Shaggy, Daphne and Velma. 18. Safe words should always be in a language that is understood and pronounceable by all parties. Klingon and Romulan safe words are not to be used. 19. Screaming "BOOOOOOBIES" and running around giggling after you see boobies is not cool. So I have been told. A lot. Okay... I like boobies. A lot. With 4 naked boobies in the room, even though you are in heaven you must remain composed, cool and debonair. Even though you really really want to yell "BOOOOOOBIES" and run around and giggle. Stay cool. Remember there will be the same reaction when you see a double set bums and vajajays. 20. You can only utter, "RELEASE the KRAKEN!!!!" once during an encounter. Plan the use of the phrase wisely. 21. If hosting, please be mindful of the fact that duo play causes more physical exertion than single play. With that in mind, extra drinks and perhaps a second bacon dish should be available for mid-session refreshments. 22. Everyone should have the opportunity to wear the unicorn mask. 23. No, you should never wear the leopard print spandex pants. They're just not... um.... you. 24. You may be a talented ventriloquist, but nobody wants to hear your penis talk. 25. When engaging in small talk, avoid all controversial subjects at all costs. Remember, you are in the room with two women. If they disagree with you, you would be twice as wrong as before.If you're twice as wrong, you get twice less sex. If you get twice less sex, you have to masturbate twice and cry twice as loudly when you do. 26. Remember that you are an adult. Never, ever say, "Neener neener neener, I'm just giving HER my wiener." The non-wiener recipient may stab you. Not saying that it would happen, just saying that it COULD. 27. Ben Affleck has seen every single possible duo combination. Some rate him highly, some rate him poorly. Don't talk about Ben Affleck. It's safer that way. 28. Make sure that you go to the bathroom several times before your duo arrives. Girls spend a lot of time in the bathroom doing mysterious and magical things, as well as peeing. You are dealing with not just one mysterious, magical peeing woman but two. You may not be able to get back into the bathroom for several hours or days. Keep that in mind. 29. All persons involved, not just the service providers, including the client must be able to sing along with Bohemian Rhapsody. The test of a successful encounter is the ability to harmonize at all points with the late Freddy Mercury. I shouldn't have to do this, but to help in your encounter, here are the lyrics: "Bohemian Rhapsody" Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality. Open your eyes, Look up to the skies and see, I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy, Because I'm easy come, easy go, Little high, little low, Anyway the wind blows doesn't really matter to me, to me. Mama, just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, Pulled my trigger, now he's dead. Mama, life had just begun, But now I've gone and thrown it all away. Mama, ooh, Didn't mean to make you cry, If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters. Too late, my time has come, Sends shivers down my spine, Body's aching all the time. Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go, Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth. Mama, ooh (anyway the wind blows), I don't wanna die, I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all. I see a little silhouetto of a man, Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning, Very, very frightening me. (Galileo) Galileo. (Galileo) Galileo, Galileo Figaro Magnifico. I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me. He's just a poor boy from a poor family, Spare him his life from this monstrosity. Easy come, easy go, will you let me go? Bismillah! No, we will not let you go. (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go. (Let him go!) Bismillah! We will not let you go. (Let me go!) Will not let you go. (Let me go!) Never, never let you go Never let me go, oh. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, mama mia, mama mia (Mama mia, let me go.) Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me. So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh, baby, can't do this to me, baby, Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here. (Oh, yeah, oh yeah) Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Nothing really matters, Nothing really matters to me. Anyway the wind blows. 30. Practice makes perfect. No the duo part, but the Queen part. Remember the appropriate amount of head banging at the guitar solo enhances everything. I'm sure there's more....

I will be there. Bring bacon. Must have bacon. I won't have a gallbladder and will be healed. Soooooo... ummm... bacon. Drenched in butter. Wrapped in bacon. Hidden in boobies. With arrows made out of bacon to guide me to the boobs that hold bacon. I'm in.