Nikki Thomas

Thanks Pete, I'm glad you feel the same way! I don't think your post was undercutting mine in the least, and I'm really happy you also have a preferred charity that you support. I absolutely agree that giving to any charity is a good thing at this time of year (except the Salvation Army, but that's another post in itself) so I'm glad to hear that others take this approach as well. In fact, why don't we make this thread into a "post your preferred charity here" thread, so anyone who wants to recommend a charity can do so? That way, anyone who feels inspired to give to charity in someone else's honour will have a nice list of worthy charities to choose from? :)

When I was growing up, Christmas was such a magical time. Setting up the Christmas tree with family, tobogganing in the snow in the park across the street, cuddling with my brothers and my dog by the roaring fire in the fireplace... It certainly was a wonderful time to be a child. Plus, we would always get a few cool gifts that we could share with our friends. Things started to change for me a little later in life, sometime in my teens, when the "Christmas Spirit" started to wane. I t wasn't so much about seeing friends and family, and more about struggling through the season, fighting our way around the mall, and somehow trying to find a gift for my parents, even though my budget meant I could never get them anything worthwhile. I began to resent the idea of having to "buy" something for someone, even knowing full well they'd never use it, just so I could meet my social obligation of buying someone something they really didn't need. With my brothers, I practically gave up - we would agree on a dollar amount beforehand, and exchange cards with the exact same amount of money inside, just so we wouldn't have to deal with the holiday hassle. I started to dread the onset of the holiday season because of it, and any magical feelings that Christmas invoked in me had long since disappeared. After all those years of stressing over gift-giving, I finally decided to give up on it this year. Instead of trying to find the perfect knick-knack for my Dad to put in his garage, or the perfect DVD that I knew my brother would love, or trying to figure out what I wanted them to give me, I just told everyone not to give gifts to me this year, and to use the money for something more important - I asked them to donate it to a charity of my choice, and I would do the same for their gifts as well. Christmas is supposed to be about the spirit of giving, but it's turned into the spirit of getting instead. Kids go back to school in January, and the first thing they ask each other is, "What did you GET for Christmas?" when they really should be asking, "What did you GIVE for Christmas?" In terms of our psychological and emotional health, it truly is better to give than to receive - those who help and give to others are considerably more happy than those who don't. So why don't we try to instill that feeling amongst our young relatives from an early age, and help them live happier lives as a result? The main reason I'm sharing this is because I want to promote a particular charity to those who might feel the same way. The Nature Conservancy of Canada is a wonderful organization dedicated to the preservation of Canada's natural beauty, and the wildlife that helps make our country so amazing. They do a lot of great work in protecting the environment that our wildlife depends on, ensuring that future generations will be able to marvel at and appreciate the same natural beauty that we sometimes take for granted. If there's someone special in your life and you can't think of a good gift to give them, then I highly recommend donating to the Nature Conservancy in their honour. It's the kind of gift that both the giver and receiver can feel good about, and at least you know the gift won't end up in the bottom drawer of someone's dresser, collecting dust with all the other pointless "gifts" we've given each other over the years. Trust me, you'll both feel really good because of it. :)

Lol, back when I was in school, there was a kid in our class named Maxwell House - I always thought it was borderline child abuse to give your kid such an easy name to make fun of! Of course, it's better than naming your kid Adolf Hitler: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2063487/Parents-named-children-Adolf-Hitler-Aryan-Nation-wont-receive-custody-newborn-son-Hons.html

Interesting, I had a friend from one of the western boards who told me he recently experienced something along these lines, and really enjoyed it... perhaps you know him? I'd love if you could PM me the details! :) I have to say, I'm happy that so many people are willing to share their threesome fantasies in this thread - it shows a high level of comfort for so many people to do so, and makes it seem a little less daunting for those who have thought about it but never taken the plunge. Kudos to everyone who's willing to explore their curiosities, it makes life so much more interesting when we do. :)

I had a great time at the July Social, when I happened to be in town; I missed the September event because I was out west, so I knew I couldn't miss out on this one! :) See you at the party!

I was really into music in grade school and high school, so I learned to play four instruments (two of them well) before I graduated. I haven't touched three of them since, but I'm still pretty good with a guitar - I'll occasionally do a bit of strumming at social gatherings. I guess you can say I can play "campfire guitar" but it's been over a decade since the last time I played with any sincerity. I have some great memories from those days, and I'm still in touch with a few friends from that era of my life - when I have kids, I hope they'll enoy making music as much as I did. :)

I totally agree, Halifax is far too nice of a place to be ignored by travelling tgirls. I really enjoyed my last visit, so I decided to make it my last trip of the year, from November 7-11. Thanks for starting this post Injen69, and I'm looking forward to meeting you next week! :)

Glad to see you have the right approach, have fun! I think we're all looking forward to reading the review! :)

I agree totally, and I'm sure that SPs with experience have handled this in the way that works best for them. I was mostly trying to give the OP a heads-up, and let him know the SP might ask for more info and details than he's accustomed to providing. For the right SP, two guys might be twice the pleasure, but from any SP's perspective, they might also present twice the dangers, especially if she hasn't seen either of them before. I was just wanted the OP to be aware of that, simply so he takes that into account when making the arrangements. I'm curious to hear how this all turns out! :)

I follow the same principle that I follow with emails - the immediate response goes on top, while the prior conversation gets stacked up below. I usually know exactly what I'm responding to, and what the previous email contained, but it's right there in case I need to refer to it while writing my reply. If that's how gmail does it, who am I to argue? After all, Google didn't take over the world by lying around at the bottom... :tongue:

Nice to see that this thread has returned to civility, it was in danger of becoming a joke way too quickly... I would also like to point out that any SP who agrees to your request will likely have some additional security concerns, because she's putting herself in a more vulnerable position (no pun intended) than she usually might. So, if she ends up asking a lot of questions, don't be surprised - she's just trying to avoid getting gang-raped. If you're willing to be patient, it might be best if you saw her solo first, just to establish a bit of trust, and you can discuss the details of the three-way after she has an idea of how comfortable she is with you. She'll likely be a lot more willing to do this if she already knows you from a prior get-together, and even more so if she knows you're not abusive or too aggressive; after all, when men get horny, they sometimes push too hard, and might be inclined to be even more aggressive when there's another man in the room. Just be sure to take the SPs concerns into account when setting this up, you'll have a lot more fun if she's not concerned for her safety. For my part, I don't think I'd ever agree to see two brand-new clients at the same time; too many things could go wrong, and unless I know the guys pretty well, it could be anywhere from awkward to dangerous. On the other hand, one of the reasons I love doing duos is because other female SPs can enjoy certain things that are normally reserved for MMF threesomes; a MFT three-way has so many unique possibilities! ;)

I'm really disappointed I won't be able to make it, but I'm in Vancouver right now, and I had to be here this week because I was doing a guest lecture at one of the local universities... as much as I love my current job, my future career always takes priority, and there just wasn't any way I could do both. :( Sorry to all the lovely ladies and kind gentlemen that I so wanted to see again, but I'll be back in Ottawa in about three weeks and hopefully we can get together then! Have a drink on my behalf and have fun, and I'll be sure to make it to the next one! :)

Erase? Probably not. Reduce? Absolutely. I don't think that the stigma necessarily affects everyone equally. It's less stigmatizing for me because I couple my work with activism and academia, so I'm not likely to lose many future opportunities because of what I currently do. But that's specific to my situation, and isn't often true for others. Conversely, an SP putting herself through law school has much greater privacy concerns than I, because revalation of her current career can be disastrous for her future career. Regardless, most SPs keep their identity secret not just to avoid stigma, but also to avoid stalkers - and decriminalization will certainly help reduce that risk. Similarly, a client who is single/separated/divorced/widowed probably doesn't have the same pressing need to maintain their anonymity, whereas a married client is probably more concerned with compromising his marriage, and not so much the social stigma attached to visiting sex workers. Regardless, our security always trumps the client's desire for anonymity, so as long as he's not concerned with the information being shared with his wife, then he won't need to remain quite so anonymous. If decriminalization increases the legitimacy of our work (and I believe that it will) then it will eliminate the opportunistic criminal element that's sometimes associated with sex work, which in turn would make clients feel safer when divulging their personal information. Meanwhile, the stigma isn't universal either... I think it's a lot more stigmatizing in cultures that are generally sex-negative to begin with, so it's more a cultural issue than anything else. I don't think Silvio Berlusconi feels the least bit stigmatized - in fact, many Italians seem to be in awe of the 75-year-old man who has a steady stream of hot sex workers visiting his mansion. Who wouldn't want to live like that? North Americans are a little more prudish than people in other parts of the world. I would argue that non-monogamous sex itself carries a certain stigma, and pay-for-play is more an extension of that stigma than stigmatizing in itself. So, it follows that if decriminalization has the potential to partially normalize a certain form of non-monogamous sex, then the stigma surrounding all forms of non-normative sexualities is bound to decline as well. So, the short answer to your question is "yes." :p I thought you were going to stay out of this from now on? :icon_confused: In any event, the confirmation came on Monday, when the Harper Government tabled their big nine-bill Crime Omnibus. If Joy Smith had proposed the Nordic approach, you can be damned sure it would have been in there as well.

Sherlock Holmes would do it for me - brilliant brain with a body to match!

First off, I'd like to thank everyone who has made such thoughtful posts on this issue, and I learned a lot by reading through all the various posts. I don't engage in a lot of online discussions, so please don't mistake my silence for non-participation; I read everything I can about the subject, and I am truly impressed by the level of discussion on this forum in particular. But for the most part, I mainly use review boards for advertising, rather than activism, because I find it difficult to do both at the same time. I usually only comment when it's something I feel very strongly about, or something I think that needs to be said. Because this is such a serious issue for everyone on this board, I felt it was important to share it as soon as possible. I hope I'm not jumping the gun, but a lot of recent information seems to indicate that Joy Smith has backed away from her promise to introduce legislation to criminalize the purchase of sexual services. SPOC has been in touch with a number of Toronto-area MPs, mostly members of the Conservative Party. Today, I had a meeting with one of them, and from what he told me, it seems very likely that Joy Smith WILL NOT try to invoke the Nordic APPROACH (I refuse to legitimize by calling it a "model" for anything) during the upcoming session. The current bill, as he understands it, focuses entirely on trafficking and does not attempt to rewrite S.213© to exclusively target the clients. I can't confirm this until I see a copy of the proposed legislation, and we're working on getting it as we speak - if anyone could assist us in this matter, it would be extremely helpful. However, all the indications point towards the government backing off this issue, at least for now. I don't think it's going to last, because sooner or later, the Supreme Court will uphold Himel's decision and the government will be forced to deal with it. But between now and then, there's a lot of work to be done, especially in terms of networking with government officials - after all, most of them will be there for another four years, and I fully expect the SCC to rule before the next federal election. I hope that the government will continue to wait for the courts to rule before tabling any legislation, and in the meantime, will examine the existing and forthcoming evidence, to try to get a clearer picture of sex work in Canada. We will continue to engage in dialogue with members of all parties, to ensure that the lines of communication remain open when the government is ready to talk about this again. There are a number of ongoing studies, many of which are recruiting now or in the near future, that specifically aim to provide sex workers with a voice. Susi probably knows more details than I do, but if anyone has ever wanted to share their story in hopes of making a difference, there are many chances to do so. The research that's going on NOW will be the research that the federal government examines after the SCC rules on the challenge, so if we want to discredit the Farleys and Fiolleaus even further, we need to counter their claims not just with methodological criticisms, but also with well-conducted, unbiased studies. Saying "those stats are flawed" isn't as nearly useful as saying, "those stats are flawed and here are some stats that aren't." Politicians respond much better to the latter, believe me. If you are interested in participating in such a study, please ask Susi or myself for more details (sorry for volunteering you Susi, but you know it comes from love! <3) Anyways, I'm pleased about this turn of events, and I hope I'm not getting ahead of myself. I know the government will have to deal with this sooner or later, but for right now, they don't want to touch it. I guess they realized that if they start policing people's bedrooms even further, they'll have one hell of a fight on their hands! Oh, and guys? We know you treat us well (especially on this board!) and that's why we love you... but the fact is, we've been shouldering the entire load when it comes to sex work activism, while you've been mostly (and justifiably) silent. I certainly don't begrudge you for it, and I entirely respect your reasons - but now, they're coming after you. Maybe it's time to start thinking of ways that you can do more for the cause? After all, Joy Smith has four more years before she's up for re-election...

... but you've done a fine job of it nonetheless. :icon_redface: Antlerman, thank you so much for your post. You have no idea how much it means to me to read this, and how honoured I feel to have helped you begin your journey into unknown territory. I do see a lot of first-timers, and when I hear that they've explored even further since our meeting, I'm absolutely overjoyed. I love what I do, and I'm so fortunate to be able to help other people open their minds. Avoiding student debt is a huge plus, and the main reason I started, but since then, I've found that I sometimes have a unique opportunity to educate people about subjects they're afraid to ask about. I'm able to help people look beyond black-and-white labels, and see the shades of grey that makes life so interesting. I'm able to help them realize that categories shouldn't stand in the way of pleasure, and I'm able to help people explore (and ultimately satisfy) their curiosity, and provide a unique experience which they may never have again. Being a sex worker isn't just about sex; sometimes, it's about being a teacher, a student, and a friend. I'm honoured to have played all of those roles for you, and thank you for playing those roles for me as well. :ThankYou: No one person can change the world, but sometimes, it just takes a few minutes to change an opinion, or a belief, or an assumption. If we truly want to make a difference, the best way to do it is by opening each other's minds, one at a time. Reading your post, and knowing how much courage it took you to write this, makes me feel so happy for you, and I congratulate you on having the guts to put this up for us to read. :bigclap: Thank you so much for the kind words, and I wish you all the best in your continued exploration of yourself, and your sexuality. :lovers:

Malika, I'm so sorry you went through this. Nobody has the right to criticize anybody else's beliefs, especially when engaging in this type of exchange. You have every right to be upset, and that guy was totally out of line. Personally, I couldn't care less what religion my client chooses to follow, and I have no responsibility to tell anyone of my own religious affiliation (if any). As far as I can tell, most religions disagree with what we're doing as it is, so I really don't think one's particular belief structure makes the slightest bit of difference. Sex and religion are like oil and water - they just don't mix.

Really? A thread specializing in duos and I didn't see it before? What was I thinking? I really, really, really enjoy duos, and I've been lucky to have a lot of great Playmates that I've had fun with. Also, lots of guys have had their first tgirl experience as part of a duo, and let me tell you, they've always left hungry for more! ;) So, here's my list of Playmates that I've played with, broken down by city: Toronto - Roxy Powers - Genevieve LaJoie - Molly Robinson - Rebecca Richardson - Felicity Scott Ottawa - Carrie Moon - Berlin - Emma Alexandra Vancouver - Miss Freyja - Vanessa Kelly (Thanks to the CERB social, actually - we hit it off so well, we decided to do duos together on my upcoming visit to Vancouver! Thanks Angela & Nicki, your event is what brought us together - in more ways than one! ;)) Calgary - Claire If you'd like to see me with any of the girls I've mentioned, I'm quite sure they'd be happy to enjoy another duo together - or, if you're an SP and you'd like to add a touch of tgirl to your sessions, feel free to send me a PM! :) So much fun - I just love :boobies:!

Wow, what a great night! I've been to a few other industry parties in Toronto, and the CERB social definitely had the most relaxed atmosphere. It's not always easy to be the only tgirl to attend these events, but everyone at the party made me feel totally comfortable from the very beginning. :) I met so many great people, and I had such a good time, I'll even arrange my next visit to Ottawa to coincide with the next social. Cheers to the organizers for all their hard work, it was most certainly appreciated by all of us. :bigclap: Sadly, this is my last full day in Ottawa, and I'm flying out on Saturday morning, but I'm already looking forward to my next visit. See you guys soon!