Phaedrus

From Colorado. It doesn't get stolen so much now.

I don't think so. Old Dog was doing something with beer-cans and string, and I think he said something about inter-nets, and that he was going to sell service, but I thought it was a BDSM thing he was doing...

Even for the ones that are fine with walk-ins, it's often a good idea to call ahead, even if it's only to ask, "Is X available in 15 minutes?" or however long you think it'll take you to get there. Saves disappointment if you want to see anyone in particular, or if you're visiting somewhere that may only have one or two MAs working at a time.

Congratulations! Here's to many more!

Congrats, Miquelon!

Congratulations, Empty83!

Train passenger tried to have sex with onboard drinks trolley A train passenger was caught trying to have sex with the on-board drinks trolley after downing a cocktail of alcohol and legal highs. Andrew Davidson attempted the bizarre coupling while shouting "I want to kiss you" at the trolley. Perth Sheriff Court heard on Tuesday that Davidson admitted behaving in a threatening or abusive manner on the Aberdeen to Glasgow service. The 25-year-old was seen humping the trolley by horrified passengers after his behaviour frightened the rail crew member so much that she ran off. Davidson foisted himself upon the trolley after the staff member became so scared that she ran from the train when it stopped. She ran off leaving Davidson molesting the trolley which contained food, drinks and cash she had taken during the journey from Aberdeen to Glasgow. Davidson's solicitor told Perth Sheriff Court that his client was "not heterosexual" and had gone crazy after taking a "legal high." Fiscal depute Jim Eodanable told the court on Tuesday: "This happened on the train from Dundee to Perth at 5.45 pm. The staff member was serving drinks and snacks from the trolley. "The accused had previously asked to purchase a can of beer from her but had been told she had run out. He approached again and tried to engage her in conversation. "Just prior to arriving in Dundee station he asked if he could kiss her and she said no. This was heard by passengers who were concerned for her safety. "One passenger, who had her daughter with her, decided to keep an eye on the situation. The train stopped and the accused was seen placing his hands on a female passenger leaving the train. Mr Eodanable continued: "The staff member was standing opposite the accused and he grabbed her right arm. He said he was going to kiss her and she broke free." The court was told that Davidson tried to pull her closer and embrace her again but she managed to break free and left the train, leaving her trolley and cash float behind. He said: "The accused was then seen trying to sit on the lap of another female passenger, before falling onto his face. He was rubbing his chest, sticking his tongue out and shouting about what he wanted to do to his boyfriend. He got back to his feet. "He then approached the unattended trolley and started rubbing himself against the trolley. '"The train had moved off and the British Transport Police were waiting for him in Perth. They found him lying face down near the train door. He indicated that he didn't remember any of the incident." Solicitor Grant Bruce, defending, said: "He has no recollection of what happened on the train at all but accepts he behaved in this manner. He was completely intoxicated by alcohol and a legal high. He has now curtailed his social life to a great degree because of this incident. "It is something that has never happened before and is unlikely to ever happen again." Davidson, West Hemming Street, Letham, Angus, admitted causing fear and alarm in Dundee and on a train journey between Dundee and Perth on July 5. He admitted behaving in a threatening or abusive manner, grabbing a staff member's arm and trying to kiss her, shouting and swearing and making sexually offensive remarks and gestures. In a letter to the court, Davidson said: "I really can't remember anything that happened. I am disgusted with my behaviour. I'm very sorry." Sheriff William Wood said: "This was an incident which must have been very distressing for all of those directly affected and the others, including families, who were on the train." He placed Davidson on community payback and ordered him to carry out 100 hours unpaid work. Davidson was not placed on the sex offenders register as the sheriff did not consider the sexual element of the case to be "significant".

Motorboating now available. Ladies, please form an orderly queue...

Congratulations, Emiafish! Here's to many more!

True. I guess it depends how worried you are about these things and how much inconvenience you're prepared to put up with. One of the many interesting things to come out of Edward Snowden's leaked documents was that the NSA really, really hates Tor. They intercept and store all the Tor traffic they can with a view to decoding it later. And since then, I've started using it for a lot of stuff... mostly because I really like the idea of the NSA spending time and resources to work out that a random guy in Ottawa is reading CBC news. Just doing my bit to make the haystack bigger... :)

Hope you had an awesome birthday, Claire!

Last time Lee Richards was in Ottawa, he challenged me to a game of poker. It was fairly even to start with; win some, lose some. But then... we get a really big hand. And I'm sure my luck's in. I'm totally going to win. And then this really hot girl in a short dress comes over and starts making out with me. Yeah, my luck's in... ...this pot's mine... ...it'll be paying for a lot of fun over the next few weeks... ...fuck. Well, Lee, I'd like you to know: I've finally worked out what happened. I'll get you next time... just you wait...

Sex, drugs and beards: an afternoon in a Pakistani porn cinema Three times a day dozens of men pack the auditorium, the air heavy with hashish smoke, to watch graphic sex movies: welcome to the Shama -- a pornographic cinema in Pakistan's Taliban heartland. For more than 30 years it has supplied erotic fantasies in Peshawar, the main city of northwestern Pakistan which borders the tribal districts that are a haven for Taliban and Al-Qaeda-linked militants. Terrified of being recognised, the Shama's customers hide their faces as they make their way to the cinema between a goat market and a bus station. There are three X-rated shows a day in the Shama's discreet back room, while the main hall is reserved for mainstream movies -- the only ones advertised outside. "Class X" customers pay 200 rupees ($1.90) and after a brief search by a Kalashnikov-toting guard, they are whisked through a courtyard and down a concrete passageway. Inside the auditorium a thick cloud of cannabis smoke hangs over the 20-odd rows of tattered fake-leather seats. During one showing, the hall was more than half full, populated by labourers, farmers, students and others who had come to escape the day-to-day claustrophobia of life in a deeply conservative Muslim region where family and neighbours keep a close eye on everything. Most arrive alone and want to remain so, arranging themselves around the seats to avoid sitting next to anyone. They are all soon gripped by the drama of the day's offering, "Dostana" ("Friendship"), a semi-amateur production made for the Shama in the more liberal eastern city of Lahore. The plot hinges on a romantic dilemma: the hero, Shah Sawar ("the Horseman" in the local language) cannot decide whether to marry his sweetheart Gulpana or his cousin Doa, chosen for him as a wife by his family. He decides to "test" his would-be brides and much of the film's two hours is taken up with long and extremely graphic sex scenes between the Horseman and his paramours. A reverential hush reigns over the audience throughout, broken only by a few suspicious noises from certain rows, while at least half sneak out before the end. The formula has made the Shama one of Peshawar's most successful cinemas at a time when many others have been forced to close. The Islamisation that Pakistan witnessed in the 1980s persuaded many that the silver screen was a sinful depravation bad for the soul of a good Muslim. The rise of videos, DVDs and the Internet accelerated the decline and now of around 15 cinemas in Peshawar 20 years ago, only seven remain. Three of them show pornography, sometimes discreetly via clips hidden part way through mainstream action movies. The Shama, the best-known of the three, is regularly full, with tickets three or four times the price of normal films. Key to its success is showing local-made pornography, which is much harder to find in Peshawar -- or on the Internet -- than Western adult films. Coming to see "Dostana" for a second time, Khaliq Khan, 30, said: "Like a lot of people here I prefer films with Pakistani girls. It's better, it seems more amateur, more real." "Dostana" is certainly amateurish, with actors regularly turning to the camera quizzically, looking for direction for their next move. The dialogue is dubbed in Pashto, the main language of the northwest, with an enthusiasm somewhat at odds with the bored, uninterested way the actors seem to be speaking in the original Punjabi. But Janus Khan is quite happy. After the screening the labourer, 22, admitted he regularly came to the Shama "to enjoy myself, alone or with one or two friends". "I'm not very pious but I'm not a rapist or unfaithful," he told AFP. The Shama has provoked controversy in Pakistan, a constitutional Islamic republic with a very conservative attitude to sex and nudity. Jamaat-e-Islami (JI), one of the country's leading religious political parties, has demanded the closure of the cinema. But the cinema has powerful owners -- the Bilour family, one of the most influential in Peshawar and a pillar of the Pashtun nationalist ANP party. Twice in the last 10 years Islamist activists including JI students have attacked the Shama, but both times the cinema has risen again. Burned down in September 2012, it reopened a month later just in time for the Muslim festival of Eid al-Adha, which saw the Shama full. How the cinema has avoided the attentions of the government censors, who cut even kissing from films, and the Taliban, who have destroyed countless supposedly "immoral" CD and DVD shops in recent years, is not clear. In private, officials point to the wealth and influence of the Bilours -- always useful in a chaotic and corrupt country. Back on the screen, "Dostana" draws to its conclusion with the indecisive Shah Sawar drowning his sorrows in alcohol. Still unable to decide he summons the two women for a final menage-a-trois and in the film's climax at last resolves to marry them both.

I really hope this kind of thing can be used as an antidote to the Nordic Model silliness. The most likely people to discover underage kids working as SPs are the clients who come across them. There's probably few enough of those clients who will tall LE about it at the moment, and turning them into criminals is hardly going to help with this.

Old Dog, I am immensely gratified to know that you'll be reunited with your one true love in the near future. However, to enjoy it properly, I think you need to get rid of your old plates and bowls and get some new ones. You know you want to....

On-set pics from the filming of Star Wars, courtesy of everyone's favourite Wookie. Sample? Obviously it has to be Carrie Fisher and her stunt double...

...or both. This will probably cause some concern. However, there does seem to be a growing awareness - in younger folks, at least - that the only way to keep information private is to not put it their in the first place, or make sure it's not persistent. If you're 16, Facebook is just a way to keep in touch with your elderly relatives (like most of us reading this :) ). Things like Snapchat are far more relevant, because you can be sure that crotch-shot you just sexted someone with isn't going any further. At least, it wasn't until recently....

Too true, my friend. Too true. But... have you seen the news? You can trade sex for fish. Really. As the song has it: I'm alright, Jack... just keep your hands off of my "stack".

If this person is too much of a coward to even leave an email address, they're not even worth the time it took for you to post on this thread, never mind wasting any more. Actually, even if they did leave an email address, they still wouldn't be worth any time at all.

An anti-speeding ad that's worth watching: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=bvLaTupw-hk Good job, NZ police.