Phaedrus

Happy birthday, Emma!

It does seem to be a PSE thing. I can't say I like it myself. Lots of spit is great, but I don't see that it needs to become airborne at any point in proceedings...

From a professional standpoint: you've taken on a contract, and you therefore have a professional duty to fulfill that contract to the best of your ability. If you can't, I suppose a full refund to you your client with whatever explanation was appropriate would be a second-best option. But taking your client's money - any of it - and then lying to her about what you'd found would be seriously unethical. From a personal standpoint, on outing a fellow hobbyist... you knew (or should have known) that was a risk when you took the job on, so you don't get to complain now that the dice have landed that way. How you feel about this is what's going to be the deciding factor in whether you fulfill the contract you've undertaken, or renege on it entirely and refund your client. But if you're not happy about taking responsibility for screwing up someone else's life, you should probably re-think this covert surveillance thing entirely. And a big +1 on the questions over the legality of what you're doing. IANAL, but it sounds highly questionable to me.

Happy birthday, Toine!

Please re-read my post. I said it was technically possible with a cylinder of compressed air, NOT with just lung-pressure. FYI, I unfortunately DID waste an entire minute of my life reading it. Regrettably, that's a minute I'll never get back. The author of that Cosmo post displays little evidence of any understanding of biology, physics, or - alas - journalism. As so often happens, any relation to reality has been sacrificed to achieve an eye-catching headline.

It sounds like we need to send a huge hug to all who knew kechara.

Sorry, probably wasn't clear... but my post wasn't aimed at you, or at anyone else for that matter. Given that this is the "New to this" section and that this is a sticky thread, it was aimed as much at someone who may read it in the future as at anyone who may read it now. Yes, you, person who's reading this in August 2013. I'm talking about YOU!

I doubt it. The camera's on his car, and as such the footage can always be mysteriously lost if it shows the cop in a bad light. This one did a good job, though, so it goes on TV instead.

I'm having trouble getting my head around the idea that you might be inhibited about something... :)

Perhaps. Something else that's happened over the last few years is the continuing growth of the Internet, and with it online communities such as this one. There is now a wealth of information about the SPs that are available, and how to go about seeing them, that simply didn't exist a few years ago. The existence of a community also provides simple reassurance to the new hobbyist or SP that they are not alone, and that many other well-adjusted individuals are doing the same as them. For many people, it's hugely comforting to know that you're not some kind of freak. I'd argue that the invention of the Internet is of more significance than the invention of ED meds, to be honest.

And not just her. If personal stuff gets out in public, other SPs will notice, and although they might not say anything at the time, they'll definitely bear it in mind should you contact them in future.

Has it occurred to you that some people who have many partners may do so because they enjoy the sex?

This is the most WTF thing I've read for quite a long time...

Cleo, perhaps?

I think RedSeductress and Parker may be out there... but I'm not 100% sure about that in either case, so I'd suggest you ask them directly...

My suspicion is that this sort of thing should probably be left to doctors. I believe Viagra can react badly with some other medications or medical conditions (not sure what, off the top of my head), so things could perhaps become rather less than fun if you gave it to someone who shouldn't have it... I can't believe any reasonable person would expect a SP to provide little blue pills, so there's probably no downside to just not doing so. And unreasonable people will just find something else to be unreasonable about even if you did :)

Look at this. You may have seen it before, but not like this: That's not a photo; it's a pencil drawing. So are these: The artist has a blog, which is worth a look. What really impressed me was his series of snapshots of the work-in-progress that became... this.

It's possible. Perhaps new methods of preventing the transmission of STIs will become available, and condoms will become obsolete. Of course, things could go the other way, too. Gonorrhea will probably become incurable in the not-too-distant future unless we come up with some new antibiotics. And if that happens, things that are currently considered acceptably low-risk by many may go off the menu entirely.

Dear MN2, What have you been doing with everyone? I've just logged in to see no posts at all, all day! Has everyone been at your place and somehow become distracted? I wish you well with your bath, although it sounds to me like you need a bathtub built for two hundred, not just two. Or is the reason your closet is bursting at the seams because you locked everyone else in there so you could enjoy a bath with just one other person? If so, I'll be over in a sec :) All the best Phaedrus

If we're talking about guys who already have jobs and careers, they're quite possibly not interested in actually becoming a RMT. I'd consider being able to give a decent massage to be a useful life skill in its own right. Of course, finding somewhere to learn that's actually compatible with having a current full-time job might be another matter entirely. I get the impression that becoming a RMT involves a significant amount of time and effort...

Thanks, guys. I never really thought to take it up with management at the time. In retrospect, I should have done. Anyway, hopefully others can learn from my mistake. The odd extra song, I can live with (I'll remember and probably avoid that dancer in future, unless she's very good, but I can live with it) and I wouldn't consider it worthy of comment. But this was... different.