Alexandra-Sky

Congrats lovely<3 xoxoxox Look at this cute gift I got you:

I also want to add these two (no making fun of me allowed...) Glee music and music videos (lol) and Christmas music, particularly Michael Buble, Mariah Carey, Destiny's Child and Nsync's Christmas albums.... I'm so embarrassed and yet so proud that my musical preferences are so corny but I love them!

List off some of the things that you know you couldn't go without and bring on the sillyness and laughter. Mine are: -my cell phone (especially now that i have a texting and data plan!) -bad tv shows, and good ones too - my beautiful friends -the internet What are yours? xo Sky

Hi all, I just wanted to add a small piece about "intentions". I think that this is likely one of the ways in which we're all getting caught up in conflict. I think that for the most part, everyone on this board that contributes to forums and posting, does so with the best of intentions. That being said, I think that sometimes, intentions are very much irrelevant. Here is an example: 1. Let's say the following question is asked: "I would like to know how many clients a day SPs see on average because I would like to make my decision as to whom I will spend time with based on their answer. I would prefer to see an SP who sees a small number of clients a day as this reflects her levels of self respect..." (Sorry, I couldn't come up with a brand new example and I realize that this what a topic of a thread a while back...) Now, to analyze this. The question to me seems very genuine and the person asking it seems to be harmless. But further analysis of the question goes like this: What assumptions are taking place in this question: that SPs who see less clients have more self respect than those who see more. This probably comes from the idea that women who sleep with less people are less slutty and therefore more valuable as people, where as women who are 'sluts' do so out of no respect for their own bodies. This is in fact, a very insulting assumption. And so, while the OP had no intention of offending, the hidden assumptions in such a question do nothing but offend. Does that make sense? Now, I don't think every question will reveal the underlying assumptions as obvious as the one I used above. Nevertheless, there is always an underlying basis for any question, we just don't recognize it much. A few weeks ago, I attended a workshop on how to be 'allies' to people with disabilities. Someone brought up the topic of 'intrusive questions'. People with disabilities get asked all sorts of questions all the time about their disability and are thus made to feel like they are 'weird/odd/ugly/abnormal'. The facilitator asked us to always ask ourselves this before asking a question about someone's disability: "Why do I want to know?" and he answered "If you just want to ask in order to fulfill your curiosity, DON'T ASK" (As it is a really selfish thing to leave someone feeling like crap solely for the purpose of fulfilling your curiosity) So my point here is to ask people to reflect on whatever it is that they'd like to know. Why is it that you're asking this question? What assumptions does this question carry with it? Are the assumptions that underly this question going to deeply affect those at which these assumptions are made about? If, once you've asked yourself all of these and still decide to ask your question as you don't see the possible harm it may cause, then please ask away! *** How can we expect people not to react to certain questions? Speaking as an SP, I have recently realized how difficult it is to live in a world that hates sex workers as much as ours does. Being treated like I'm immoral, made to feel dirty and unworthy of attention and value, having to fight in order for my mom to see me in a positive light in the way that she once used to...all of this is draining on my heart. And so to log onto CERB and to find that these very same attitudes are taking place in the one place that I expect them not to, of course I'm going to be upset. Just because all of the things I've listed above are never explicitly said, it doesn't mean that they don't characterize a lot of the 'questions' that I sometimes see being asked in people's posts. So my point here is that WE ALL need to be more reflective. Both on the part of people who are being offended by questions asked (maybe jumping right on the OP isn't the best approach every time) and by the people asking such questions (think about why it is you want to know the answer, and what you're assuming by even asking in the first place. And then if you find that people are becoming upset with your question, take some time and reflect. Ask yourself what it is you were not seeing when you first asked the question and if you realize that indeed there is a valid reason for people taking offense than perhaps take some responsibility and offer an apology). I would like to end and say that I'm not exactly sure of the context in which the Original Post exists, but I interpreted his post as directed at very specific reactions to particular threads that have taken place in the last few months. I hope that all made sense and I'll try to edit this tomorrow when I'm more awake just in case it doesn't. With lots of love and compassion. Have a lovely night, Sky

erin is such a beautiful person...so lovely <3 and old dog is ummmm ;)

Samantha! You are so amazing. Thank you for all of the love you bring to the board. It really soothes my heart. Xoxo

I'm wondering if hobbiests find these valuable? I've been thinking of starting my own lately even if just for my own personal development. I'd love to hear from SPs/MAs who use this and from others who read them. Thanks in advance. Sky

I think it can be liberating but would also be annoying during the odd time you'd need it. I can do most things on my phone but when I need to write long emails or things of the sort, I whip out my laptop in frustration lol!

That's intense. But I can't say I'm all that surprised. *Most* instituionalized religion is really sex negative, but it's just not as obvious.

This is a really amazing one! I think I may steal it for myself =).

This is really sad. It seems to me that this also has to do with the way out society undermines traumatic events in people's lives and stigmatizes and neglects mental illness which results in people going untreated etc. additionally, as a culture, if we had the tools to support people going through things like this (I.e if we were taught in school what signs to look for and ways we can help instead of do more damage) then a lot less people would take their lives. My thoughts go out to the families and friends who have to live with the guilt and horror of losing someone to suicide. And also to the people who took their lives that were in so much pain that they made the choice to take their lives in order to rest in peace. Xoxo

Anymore talents? This thread is fun fun fun!!

What kind of silly question is that? =p

I like Old Dog because he's smokin' hot!

I like RG enough that I've posted about that very feeling multiple times now in this thread =)

Yayyyyyyyyy Berlin! Thanks for being the incredible and out spoken lady that you are!!!!

Thank you friends!!!! I unfortunately won't be attending the social tonight but I expect you all to have fun on my behalf. Lots of hugs from Sky!!! xoxoxoxo

I like Soleil because she is super sweet and also hot :)

I think that we need to start a CERB band with all of the singers and musicians here.... Maybe we would even become famous! :p

I have to say that whenever someone contacts me about my ad to ask for "more info" (usually all answered on my site) or to ask questions which have already been answered on my site or ad, it is a HUGEEEEE turn off! I try to remain positive as much as I can but it really irks me. Thank you to those who don't do this though, it makes me really happy and it automatically makes me feel that more comfortable with you if we're meeting for the first time! xo Sky

Tonight's episode of Dexter was soooooo gooooddd.. I can't stand the build up! Eee!

Thought I'd start a thread to allow everyone the opportunity to share what his/her/their talent is! I would say mine is that I can sing, love to sing and have been training with a coach on and off for about 10 years or so... (currently training to audition for an Opera *eek!) What about you? xoxo Sky

Well now that we're including past shows I will add: Friends Charmed (no judging!) Medium

lowdark!!! you're the besttttt!!!