Alexandra-Sky

I like the doggie^^^ (don't let this thread die!!! lol)

I think that I'm not alone in thinking that I was really surprised when first signing up to CERB at how much goes on here. While CERB was originally established as a forum to facilitate both SPs and Hobbyiests' experiences of finding a good match, those of us who are on here regularly know that CERB has far outgrown this single purpose. We regularly have respectful discussions about all sorts of things: politics, sexual health, relationship advice, to name a few. I thought it would be a good idea to start a thread where everyone can share some of the things we've learned as a result of CERB. I'll start: When I first started working, I had already done some work to break down the stereo-type of who clients were, but it was CERB who taught me that people who seek companionship from SPs are often wonderful, respectful and kind-hearted people. I also learned how powerful all of the SPs on here are! XO Sky

i like shymale's avatar!!! so cuteeeee!!

I'm going to encourage everyone who wants to, to say hello to me! After every social i go to, people message me and say they saw me but were too shy to say hi! I'm really nice, I promise! Say hello!!!!!!!!

Can we add Rachelle Reigns to the list?

i really enjoy arejayell's posts!

I'm pretty sure the only person who I wanted to nominate that hasn't already been nominated is Lowdark. Unless I missed him?

Although I don't have kids, I can sort of respond to this thread by relating to the thoughts I have about telling my parents about my work. I acknowledge that I'm in a relatively privileged position on this, meaning that if I decided to tell my folks about my work, I would be risking things that wouldn't necessarily affect my ability to survive (i.e. I'm completely financially independent etc) and therefore I have little to lose if I told them and they reacted negatively. I mean sure, they can stop talking to me for a bit, but if that did happen, it wouldn't last forever. I think for people who can and want to, telling other people that they sex work/hobby can be a very powerful thing. Given that almost everyone knows a sex worker or hobbyist (often times, unknowingly), putting a face (especially a face of someone you know) to a hobbyist/sex worker can slowly start to humanize people involved in this industry. I think it would send a powerful message to my parents when they know that their scholarship-student-activist-independant daughter is sex working. Sure this might not happen right away, but eventually I think it'd help them get rid of some of the myths and misconceptions out there about sex work/hobbyists. Having said that, I think it's everyone's choice to disclose or not disclose their involvement in this industry and I totally respect everyone's decision regarding this matter! With love, Sky

Lol I have been thinking about starting a thread like this for a while. Posts definitely influence my decisions regarding which clients I see. If someone says something super offensive or ridiculous I have a hard time seeing myself getting along with that particular person and therefore I wont see them. Luckily, there are very few people that I feel this way about. Xo Sky

Because some messages you receive are just too good to keep to yourself. I thought I'd start a thread that would try to emphasize all the wonderfulness that are the people here on CERB. The idea is to basically post/re-word what someone else has written to you in a PM or wall message. I will ask that you do not post who sent you the message you share unless you have their permission to do so first. Here's a good one I received lately: Title: Please contact your bank.... On behalf of those of us who can't resist you, please make arrangements with your bank to have an ATM installed in your apartment...we thank you in advance for your co-operation. Affectionately, Gentlemen of CERB (but especially me) **** Hehe, awesomeness! xoxo Sky

Meg is super helpful and friendly. I really appreciate that meg! Also, woo 30+ pages of beautiful words!

the name shymale is just so cute!!!

Thank you, all! You're all very lovely and I wouldn't have anything to contribute if it weren't for the environment on this board which all of you so greatly contribute to! xo

Isabella is so lovely. We have yet to meet in person but we have good conversations once in a while! xo

Maybe sending her a message along the lines of : 'Hey, i remember you telling me some really awful things about this person and I am wondering if everything is ok with you. Is there anything I can do for you? Anything you need from me?'

I tend to think that it is irresponsible of people standing by and watching violent situations take place. While usually the focus of action in these situations relies on trying to convince the woman (who usually experiences the abuse) to 'see the light', we often forget that she is not the problem, he is. The right course of action is to call him out on his abusive behaviour. Of course, this becomes more complicated if you do not know the abuser, just the person who is facing the abuse. To complicate matters, usually the woman does not want you to intervene in her abusive relationship, and she may have a lot of very valid reasons for this. Do you know any of her friends who you can trust and talk to about this? Do you know any of his friends who you can trust and talk to about this? If so, those can be some ways that you can somehow intervene in the situation? I guess if you answer those questions, i may be able to provide you with some more suggestions?

I totally agree Megan. I had a conversation with a client mine yesterday who's been a regular for quite sometime. I could honestly say that I would defend my clients till the end: these people are some of the most respectful, lovely, caring and fun people i've ever met. Before I started working, I had some really shitty sex experiences, but this job has really changed that. All of my clients could trust that if ever need be, I will have their back i.e. ensuring that our relationships stay secret from those whom they need to be hidden from etc. Love to all of you! xo Sky

this is already happening. the work that so many of us do is rarely talked about or portrayed in the media. additionally, while others don't engage in many forms of what is conventionally known as "activism", many people living and working within the sex-trade are challenging all of the oppressive structures in our society by simply existing. and lastly, i would argue that especially here on CERB, the existence of an SP-only section is a form of resistance and social change in that it serves as a wonderful and broad-encompassing venue to build community and relationships with other sex workers that is characterized by a lot of knowledge sharing and support from each other. Wendy was amazing. She did amazing work. But to suggest that others aren't already engaged in similar struggles and carrying on her vision of a society that provides justice to sex workers is inaccurate. (I know this is probably not what you meant, but i wanted to add in this comment just in case others interpreted it that way) With love, Sky Additional Comments: SUCCESS!!! "Sex workers rights activist turned Osgoode law student found dead"

I sent a message to the Toronto star: "Hi there http://www.thestar.com/news/article/1037824 Prostitute turned Osgoode law student found dead I think it's really problematic that even though you mentioned Wendy's correction of her professors use of the word 'prostitute' in this article, you still decided to use the word prostitute to describe her in the title of your article. Maybe you should consider changing this, in honour of Wendy who would've likely wanted to be referred to as a sex worker and not a prostitute." If folks are as pissed as I am about this, you should consider sending them your own message to which can be done by clicking "report an error" at the bottom of the article.

hahaha! good analogy!

This is really sad. Such a big loss for the movement and most importantly for her family, friends and immediate community. I hope that this thread can stay on topic and not speculate about the circumstances of her life nor her death. Rest in peace and power, Wendy.

a dude that talks about women as if they are only made up of "pussy" doesn't even deserve respect, much less class! "fellas" pfft.

listen bud, i sleep with a lot of men that cheat on their wives and pretty much all of them are way more respectful than you'll ever be. the fact that you're single is totally irrelevant. and now i'm done feeding the trolls. night, loser!

You're so sexist! YOU CAN GET THE PUSSY IN A WEEK? WHAT ARE WE, OBJECTS? GROSSSSSSS!!!

Elizabeth always makes me smile. She is super nice and caring. She also has awesome things to say when in political discussions. xo