backrubman

Ok so I'm quite knowledgeable about computers and the Internet but, social networking, not so much so I'm hoping someone can help me with this one. So it seems every time I exchange emails (I use Gmail or more precisely Google Apps with a hosted domain) with an SP sooner or later she shows up as a "suggested friend" on Facebook. So somehow facebook is able to access my contacts in Gmail? I never gave it credentials or permission to do this so how the heck is it getting into my contacts list on gmail? Yes, I use the same email address with facebook but the password on facebook is very different. I could understand if this was Google+ doing this, yeah Google hosts my contact list so there is nothing we can do to stop the leakage there :) But I don't get it, how Farcebook is getting access to my Google contacts? So one SP did send me a friends request and that was fine as my privacy settings are set that my friends list is private to everyone -- until she indiscreetly posted on my wall and then rather than bother messing around with privacy settings I just blocked her completely. But SPs have started to show up as suggested friends and it's getting annoying. So another SP just showed up as a suggested friend, blocked her completely too but I still don't get how Farcebook is able to know about my contacts list on Google? Heck the Google account password uses Google Autenticator so the password is only good for one minute anyways. How is Mark Zuckerberg (now known as Suckerberg after that IPO) getting is paws on my Google Contacts? I should mention that I don't have a big problem with SPs on my Facebook but I know it creeps some of them out when they get a friends request on Facebook from a client (which I would never do unless suggested by them) and I would imagine a little less so but still somewhat creepy when I become a suggested friend to them. Any insight appreciated. Inquiring minds want to know.

And that gentlemen is what separates the real ladies from the girls, take notice. I'll never view service providers as always or only providing services of a strictly sexual nature. To me, a real service provider knows what services I need most at the time and provides them. It might be companionship or some coffee and "something nourishing to eat". The more of SamanthaEvan's (and a few others) posts I read the more impressed I become. The more special ladies like this I meet the more impressed I become also. With the girls, yes. But with the real ladies like this they are consistent, considerate, reliable, dependable, experienced and always very special.

WTF?!!?? Well you said "this site" and CERB doesn't allow negative reviews so that's a sure way for him to get his membership swiftly suspended or more likely cancelled and become unwelcome to ever return. That said, this kind of behavior is completely inexcusable. He is obviously unworthy of any further thought or consideration on your part. If he bad mouths you on any other board I am sure there is some recourse available there also. My guess is he will not be around here much longer and probably it will have nothing to do with you or this incident. We see complete jerks come and go (forcefully) pretty quickly. Any worthy client understands and respects your need for privacy. If he really is shallow enough to care that much about a pretty face then why not invite you to a paid lunch date first? I always do this when practical of course in my case it has absolutely nothing to do with the ladies outward appearance, I simply want to know and trust her and find it makes for a better outcome in the end, but even much more important I want to give her the chance to get to know me :) I'm shocked at this. What you wonderful ladies have to put up with sometimes amazes me.

Guilty Tendencies! Kinda cool and yet I feel no guilt having been nothing but a complete gentleman. Any lady who has met me knows my real name (as I always produce my driver's license or passport) :)

Good point. So true, but at some point a conscious choice of free will was made. And I would consider any state of consensual consent (that might have existed) to now no longer exist or be invalid when someone is now known to be under the influence of any mood altering drug (including alcohol).

Well I always consider the fee at risk, just like many of the other risks we take and there are plenty even with the finest most reliable SPs we are talking risks (of a different sort) and so they and we both accept these risks. I'd be a lot more concerned that another human being has a drug problem (than I would about something as unimportant as money) and at the same time there is little you can do about it. I wouldn't even judge someone that uses drugs, it's their choice and their life. But any SP I know would kick my ass out the door (or leave quickly if they are on my turf) if I was high, so I would do the same if the roles were reversed. I say if she is high and not to the point of her life at risk from an overdose (and you can't really be expected to be able to evaluate that unless you are a medical Doctor), run like hell, never to return or at least until she get's herself straightened out. Of course it would take a lot of straightening out and some time before she'd ever see me again.

Yes I noticed that also!!! Clearly it must be a new record. Sincere congratulations!

Oddly I know I have run into them because statistically I must have, having once run out of pages in my passport. That said, can't say they have ever bothered me at all. Maybe I'm just lucky but no one is that lucky so for some odd reason they leave me be. Of course on returning home, the luggage stays in quarantine and each and every piece of clothing is washed in hot water or otherwise treated (dry cleaning) and then the luggage itself must be treated as well. A real pain but a very worthwhile precaution when we consider the possible outcome of not going to this trouble. Of course the bedbug Lee Richard's found is always welcome and never a problem, just the opposite :)

Seems a little like breathing to me and when we become aware of our breathing then it's almost an annoyance to switch it back to autopilot. See what I mean: inhale, now exhale, now inhale again, ok, exhale again. Opps, now you have taken conscious control and switched off the autopilot. You best fly the plane until the autopilot takes over again. Clearly this is something we don't often consciously think about, but odd we may need helmets to protect against head banging if we do and never require that if we don't. Hmmmm....

Well I think there are several things we can learn from this thread. One is how even if we are complete gentlemen, you can go from that to being a complete and total jerk in one sentence or even one short phrase that shouldn't have been said. I noticed this phenomenon even here on CERB. If there is any ambiguity to what you say and it could be taken in a way other than meant, look out, and I promise I'm not grumbling over the small misunderstanding of my post in this specific thread (my fault as I let it be ambiguous and should have known better) but speaking in much more general terms. As for guys liking such a remark that is so unacceptable when made to a lady, I suppose I can well relate to that. I was once totally sexually harassed by a lady at work and my reaction was to smile and drive home after this singing with the radio. If the same remarks had been made with the genders reversed, the guy would have been sacked, plain and simple. In fact, if I had taken offense and reported what she said and some of it was indeed overheard (yes, it really was), she would have been sacked, but rather than that outcome it simply made my day. So ladies are ladies and gentlemen are gentlemen, as much as they say they deserve to be treated as equal, this clearly isn't one of the ways they want to be equal and I don't think it should be.

With our cats (we have three, not by choice then but who can turn away, and therefore sentence to death, a cat that comes to your door with a broken paw and wants to limp in?) my wife is disabled and for the most part house bound so we don't feed them at any time, never, ever until they ask as she is always around when I am not. So when they get hungry they sure do let you know it, no problem with communication. So there is always some dry cat food available if the humans are all asleep or not home. But if they decide they want canned food, they just ask. None are skin and bones and none are fat, they are all just all very happy that we know how to use a can opener when asked.

Oh shazbot! I didn't say that did I? OMG! I'm so sorry if I did! Ok, so I didn't but I'll apologize anyways because you think I did and I'll own it as could be taken out of context :) Nope, no ass there, just a reference to a compliment from a stranger. So I say if stranger makes a remark about your ass, pepper spray him and then tell the nice policeman that he asked you to give him your purse and threatened to hurt you if you didn't :) I'm all for letting him have it if it is a rude remark as opposed to a compliment from a complete stranger. Hmmm, why didn't I see that my post could be taken the wrong way? Guess it would simply NEVER EVER occur to me to make any remark like that. So I was truly thinking about a complete stranger giving you a general complement and it being inappropriate because it is a stranger. As for a comment about someones ass to a complete stranger - the use of lethal force might be justified.

And I think we can all agree he'd be quite surprised if you did thank him for a comment "that he knows will not be appreciated.". No man expects this, but some are jerks or speak without thinking. The OP acted like a complete gentleman and didn't make the comment (can't convict him on his thoughts) but almost made the mistake of being a guy that deserves to be pepper sprayed! So he said nothing and asked our opinion which is the gentleman like thing to do. Now from the responses here he for sure won't make the mistake he almost did make. So say thanks or pepper spay him: One gets you a smile and the other gets you court ordered anger management classes :) I say don't take life so serious -- no one has ever survived it. And for sure don't let a single jerk ruin your day (even if it's me). Yeah I could have thrown a punch at the co-pilot and gotten away with it, sure it was rude to begin with to be speaking in Russian thinking we wouldn't get a word of it, and that just for starters, now lets move on to what they were talking about. But perhaps in his culture? Just haven't spent enough time there to know. Look out guys, they got pepper spray and know how to use it! :)

It's not really a weird question at all. Like mrrnice2, I used to get headaches more often when I was younger and not so much now. But they were pretty debilitating and sometimes lasted for days. I find it difficult to believe that such a headache could be attributed to a simple allergy but then anything is possible. I wonder if you have ever tried any of the triptan class of drugs for headaches? (e.g. Imitrex (sumatriptan) or something similar). My worst headaches predate the invention of this drug (it's a synthetic designer drug) but I was fortunate enough to get a dose of it to treat a bad headache before it was even on the market (or approved) and I have to tell you, it was like turning off a light switch. Within a couple of minutes after IV injection, no more headache - at all. It really saved the day for me once as I had traveled thousands of miles to give a presentation and was unable until injected with Imitrex and then my troubles were over, it would still be a number of years before my Doctor in Canada could prescribe it. Might be something worth trying, can't see the harm in trying it once as it will either work or it won't.

Well welcome to CERB. What you describe is commonly available and your approach seems a little too much secret agent to me. Any lady offering what you seek is going to provide you with a discreet and private service without you having to explain your presence wherever it may be. That said, if you had indicated the city you live in in your profile or mentioned the city in which you'd like to find this you would have likely received a PM from just who you are looking for (but you must specifically invite ladies in a given city fitting your criteria to PM you, only then can they within the rules) and you would then be able to review her recommendations and posts and conduct your own due diligence. While your caution is understandable, it isn't so necessary. As long as the lady has a good reputation then she only got this by providing a good experience.

So this isn't about a specific lady you wrote a recommendation on asking for any additional or specific info you are comfortable sharing? If it is, I share only what I am comfortable with and if you didn't recommend someone publicly then PM back and tell him to do his own research and due diligence :) I feel comfortable recommending any lady I know if someone tells me the specifics of what they are looking for, but leave it up to the ladies screening procedures to ensure he is a good client as he could just pick her at random and ask to see her anyways. The difficulty is then when he says you recommended her and tries to draw some relationship to you who she trusts, so a preemptive email warning of no association or knowledge of him is also in order. Or no response at all... the choice is yours. If I know a lady I have no problem promoting her when asked and she seems a good fit, sending her business but I sure don't want to be used or mentioned in anyway when doing this. Sometimes I come across a post or something that infers a relationship in doing my research, so I PM the guy and say do you know this lady, what say you? If he writes back and says, "Yes, she's a sweetheart" that's all I wanted to know. Yup clients check references too in the absence of other information like recommendations or recent recommendations. In any event, never give out insider (non public) information, it's not our business or place to do so.

I think any number of posts are easily achieved, especially if one plays the word game and song threads but what makes RoamingGuy especially special is his constant and consistent words of simple wisdom (the best kind of all). He probably doesn't even realize just how many people, myself included (and many lurkers also we don't even know about) that read what he has to say, consider his ideas and attitudes and then adopt them as their own simply because they make so much darn sense! Many times I remain silent on a thread as he has already given such a good answer or opinion, clearly nailed it and there is simply nothing more to value add to it. When I do respond on a thread he has already commented on, I never find myself disagreeing with his really sage advice. So thanks RG, your consistent presence and clear words of wisdom are always much appreciated. Of course it does lead one to wonder when he gets time for fishing with his clothes on :)

I have to agree... if he is looking to escort ladies he won't be getting many calls from soccer moms. It's just not socially acceptable to them and they wouldn't feel comfortable engaging his services even if they wanted to (and I'm sure some do but still won't go there). That said, provided he is well mannered, educated, sophisticated, a great dresser and has the right look there are lots of wealthy ladies that absolutely do go there, but they won't be responding to an ad in the newspaper. A much more sophisticated and elegant marketing approach is required to reach that audience which would be quite challenging but ultimately lucrative for the few that get there.

The ladies give so much of themselves and ask so little in return. It is truly the worlds most honourable of vocations, don't let anyone tell you any different. As a financial trader I can relate (just a little, but not to this level of all out ignorance) as sometimes it seems I have a target painted on my back and I end up paying for the sins of criminals like Bernard Madoff. It is hard to find the words to provide you any comfort when encountering something so incredibly off base, so all I can say is that I will be forever grateful to the wonderful, beautiful, kind, caring, true Goddesses of this vocation that I have met or will meet in the future. Thank you ladies for being there and doing what you do and asking so little in return. We probably admire you an order of magnitude more than those that despise you out of ignorance.

I'm curious. Was it the rude gas station attendant (in Quebec), my odd friends or the Americans who can't navigate and read the signs you thought were "rednecks"? Inquiring minds want to know :)

Rightly or wrongly (and I suspect wrongly) there is a general stereotype among the rest of North America that Quebec is not a friendly place. Is it the hostility beyond the Hull/Gatineau area some have encountered if you can't speak french that you mention? Is it the alienated American tourists who marvel at signs only in French when they thought they were visiting a bilingual country and then leave quickly never to return? (they have told me of this) Who knows for sure? But what I do know is that the stereotype does exists and saying it comes from ignorance and shouldn't exist may well be correct but that doesn't change the fact that it is real and persists to this day. Quebec needs to take some steps to correct this and make tourists and outsiders feel more welcome. All the hoopla of the past about laws that dictate you can't have english signs in a bilingual country don't help. In my younger years, I would traverse the province with my friends. They would fill up on Edmunston, New Bruswick and have an extra 10 or 20 gallons in a gas can in the trunk (just in case) so they wouldn't have to stop and deal with anyone in Quebec and could make it to Lancaster, Ontario before stopping for fuel again. Was this my idea? Nope, but they as a group were always convinced that stopping in Quebec was not the thing to do. Why is this? Well it seems that they stopped once and the gas station attendant wouldn't speak to them in English and gave them a hard time, once was enough. So that was in my teenage years and now I am middle aged be be darned if one of friends from those teenage years (now middle aged also) didn't stop by the other day to borrow the biggest gas can I had as he was driving to Toronto and still wasn't going to deal with anyone in Quebec. So I told him, "you know, there is really no need of this, things have changed", but he planned to motor on through, not stopping for food or gas and not spending a cent there. Vive le Québec libre! :)

I so agree. And never mind the rules and policies but the privacy behavior can change without notice. What I found interesting about the video tutorial I posted the link to on making private circles is then if any component part is marked public, the public setting overrides the private and makes the private become public. Of course one would not expect this to occur without warning but surprise - it does! Best (only) approach is totally separate accounts or perhaps the best approach is don't mix social networking with client lists or SPs, at least not yet. The implications and outcome is unpredictable.

Well I think that is really nice (no secrets) and I'm not saying that this applies to your circumstance (or anyone's) but we do know a couple that we are good friends of ours with who went down this very road. The husband was very much onside perhaps too much so. In the end, the jealously and many other hazardous feelings kicked in, they are now separated (divorce proceedings in progress) and she is living with her new female partner while he goes though a series of girlfriends - it made us very sad. I irony for me was that before this I thought they were the model couple and had something special and was even a little envious of the great marriage they had. I wouldn't want to see this happen to you and it won't no matter what you decide as long as you understand all the complex dynamics and risks and manage the risks ahead of time. My wife is disabled and unable so she often encourages me to "Get a girlfriend" or "see someone" and has even offered to finance a "professional" companion on occasion. I never admit to doing this as it would just make her feel more inadequate then she already does. If she knew I was with a SP her mind would be racing wondering what was going on and of course if she was with me, well that would be even more hurtful. No doubt in my mind that SPs have saved our marriage but in order for it to work for us, there has to be the don't ask, don't tell policy.

I've got a house I don't want and can sell you at that price! Of course being the honest person I am I have to warn you it's only worth about $5000. Ok, yeah, the world probably, maybe, might not, end on December 21st, 2012 but it's a hell of a good excuse to have a hell of a party! And then again on the 31st to ring in the new year, oh yeah, right, only if that comes because the world didn't end :)

Actually, given that you say "with focus on me", your description says "w4w" and given all the other discussion that has occurred on this thread I do wonder why take on the hazard and risk of involving him at all? With the "focus on me", he is sure to be affected in a negative way, perhaps more so than if he were to eventually discover you went it alone behind his back so to speak. You should certainly consider that when most married men see an SP, they don't invite their wife along. Given that many men see an SP for something that is lacking in their marriage, shouldn't this work the other way around also? I learned a lot from my thread "Oh no! Cheating husbands??!?" even if my questions were too complex. Just a final thought. I don't want to encourage or discourage or judge anyone but thought the "it should work both ways" point should be present.