Brad

Terrific thread, Nathalie! I would just really want people to know the respect I have for the ladies I have the opportunity to meet. I could handle assumptions that I must be a loser. Or gross. Could only possibly get sexy by paying for it. Addicted to boobs (okay, that last one may have some truth). But I find the stereotype that I'm happily exploiting women who must surely be victimized deeply troubling and insulting.

I'd start by taking a look at it with a different browser (Firefox, Chrome, etc). That will help narrow it down at least and let you know if it is your computer system itself or something in the browser version you use. If it only happens in one browser, maybe let us know which version you use. There could be some update or add on you have affecting it.

3000??? Wow! Nice work and keep it going.

I might add a plug for the uniform/roleplay social group: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/group.php?groupid=183 Lots of sexy costumes to be found there (my favourites being some shared by Cerb ladies)! - - - - - - - -

I'm curious to know what you would name as the one thing (activity, cause, subject) that you are most passionate about? I'm actually having some trouble answering this for myself. I have a lot of interests, some charities I support, hobbies I enjoy, and so on, but I'm having trouble picking one thing I'm passionate about to the point that it helps define who I am. But maybe some of you know have a clearer idea for yourselves? (Oh, and just to clarify, I mean other than having sex! Sorry, that's too easy an answer this time. :tongue:)

If you're referring to stories like the one below, keep in mind the people being arrested are those soliciting for sex in public, which is illegal and likely to get a person in trouble. http://ca.news.yahoo.com/10-men-charged-moncton-sex-trade-crackdown-enter-222701915.html

1) Oh boy... 2) Oh boy! 3) OH BOY!!! Somewhat more seriously: 1) I hope I look calmer than I feel 2) I hope she smiles when we first see each other 3) OH BOY!!! (yeah, that one is still the same)

Splitz, first of all let me say how cool it is to read that you've changed your mind on this. A reasoned exchange of views and ideas online leading to someone adjusting their view? I think we may have just broken the Internet! :) I understand what you are saying in terms of clarifying that you weren't envisioning a private section for negative remarks. But personally I don't think your comparison to discussing a new boyfriend and their first date quite holds up. After all, I think we know that the details that would end up getting discussed in a private section would end up being a lot more than just 'were they a good kisser or conversationalist'. Plus, it would be shared with a larger audience. To keep with your comparison it would be more akin to Julie and Jake finishing their first date, and then Jake going to a private group on Facebook and sharing with all the people there--many he doesn't even know enough to trust--the intimate details about Julie's sexual preferences, what activities she offered, how her breasts felt, etc. Not quite the same thing as sharing with a best friend some details about a new crush. You're right that these aren't necessary negative details or SP bashing--they could be shared with the best of intentions--but it would still end up discussing things better left for the lady to decide whether she wants shared or not. For one thing this allows the lady to control which activities may become expected by others.

WriteOn, Emily is spot-on here. As she initially suggested a vasectomy for a male is a very basic procedure, especially compared to the female alternatives. If a couple is no longer interested in having children and want a permanent solution, a vasectomy is indeed way more straightforward and safe than tubaligation, etc. I know people that have taken longer to recover from a trip to the dentist! :)

Hi Jenna, welcome to the site. Here is the thread Chanel mentions where a lot of people have weighed in with some good advice on this topic: http://www.cerb.ca/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=148034

Can anyone deny it?

Splitz, you were asked to provide your reasoning for a hobbyist-only section of Cerb, and I can appreciate that you've done so. However, while I understand what you are saying and I think you've respectfully tried to lay out your reasons, I still wouldn't want to see such a section created. You are right that I wouldn't feel comfortable in a public recommendation getting into details of a lady's physical attributes or sexual preferences/acts, etc. However, I also wouldn't feel comfortable doing so in a private section as you describe it. Just because the lady may not be able to see it doesn't, to my mind, make it "not public". Rather it would make me feel like I'm just talking about her behind her back, and my own feeling is that if she wants such details shared then she'll do so herself. Whatever benefit such a section may have also seems, to my mind, not to outweigh the potential harm and ways that it could be abused. Basically, I think it would cause more work and heartache than it would save. I've heard some other sites have very little involvement by the ladies. One of the things I specifically like about Cerb is how present and active the ladies are in the discussions. I'd hate to see anything that would take away from that. I know you said that any gent who wouldn't want to use a private-only section could just avoid it, but you also have been asking for opinions, so for what it's worth, there ya go. Cheers.

I think it's hard to deny that women are objectified more than men, and also have more societal pressure to conform to a certain body image. As Il Re and others state, men are certainly not immune to such forces, but it's undeniably more pervasive for women. And such things can certainly cause issues both on an individual and societal level. That said, I think it is OK to take pride in one's appearance or enjoy feeling sexy (however you define it) as long as you're doing it for yourself and not just for others. So if wearing makeup, dressing up, or even plastic surgery makes you happy, then hey, it's your body and you go ahead! To my mind it's only an issue if you're doing these things only to please others or because you base your worth as a person on your looks. I like to have a good haircut and I don't like how I look when having a bad hair day--but I don't think I'm a lessor human being because of one! :) Likewise, I think it is OK and undeniably normal to be attracted to someone on a physical level. Again, the key is that you don't value a person solely for their physical assets, or judge their worth--or your own!--based on how closely one matches some societal ideal. It is possible to admire someone physically without reducing them to an object. Just about everyone likes feeling attractive; no one likes feeling like a bag of meat. Basically, by no means should a person be shamed because they don't fit society's ideal body image. But nor should a person be made to feel shame because they are considered attractive, feel sexy, like to dress up, etc. Neither is fair to women--or anyone for that matter.

I think I've been hypnotized...

For my part, I have to say this link has it all: http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/things-you-will-never-be-able-to-forget