Eric Northman

Heh...I can just see one of us men trying to answer this. "Oh yeah, you should see SoAndSo...she's really fat. Oh and WhatsHerFace...she's chubby too." Can you imagine? Suicide!

I don't know if mine are back...nobody ever PMs me...aw...poor me. ;-)

See, now that brings up an interesting question. Although I do my best and take extra special care before encounters, I suppose it's not impossible that I could have bad breath at some point. I kind of hope the lady would say something, somehow...perhaps politely mentioning that she has mouthwash or some such. I'd rather be a little embarrassed but be given the opportunity to fix the problem. If any ladies are reading, what do you think? I'd rather be told than have a session be uncomfortable.

Feel free to send me a PM if you want to test it.

Total deal breaker for me. I don't know what to do with myself if I'm not kissing. Not to say I kiss constantly but going in for kisses is such a big part of the experience that not being able to feels so very awkward. Ruins the intimacy for me. Only ran into a non-kisser once and, in spite of her being incredibly hot and fun, I won't go back because of it.

Okay, doing God's work here. Link for the lazy. Had some deja-vu about this subject. Apparently Someguy also created a thread about Cuddles, Kissing and Hugging. Apparently there are no new questions.

So I actually took the time to read the entire thread because I wanted to see if my question had already been asked. Turns out it hasn't. A very common 'restriction' I see in ads, particularly elsewhere, is along the lines of "35+ gentlemen only please". Even among those who don't restrict based on age, there seems a general tendency to prefer more 'mature' men. Can you tell us what sort of behaviors are common in the younger set that make you prefer not to see them? On a related side note, another really common restriction I'm noticing on another ad site is race related, specifically black men. Now this is a dangerous area of discussion and I expect many of you wouldn't want to touch it with a ten foot pole but it really seems quite prevalent. I actually asked a lady about it and her answer didn't really seem race related but more like a subset of the behaviors that one might expect in response to the above question. That is, it seems like more of a maturity thing than a race thing. Humans are pattern oriented so most stereotypes come from repeated observations of similar behavior. My theory is that after a few annoying interactions, some ladies may just conclude that screening a subset of the population is easier than the hassle of weeding out the good from the bad. Two people seeing similar patterns may draw different conclusions. One may decide it's because they're young, another because they're black. Anyway, this is perhaps more controversial than is suitable for this board. I'd still like to hear about the older guy preference. It may help some younger readers understand what they should do to be good clients.

Not an SP but I have a bit of experience with this as well. I think it really depends and there isn't a right answer. Fundamentally, the question you have to ask is, "Was this a deliberate bait and switch or just me having overly high expectations?" For instance, a couple of times I've met ladies who REALLY didn't live up to what I imagined. The reason in these cases was that the photos were very selective and only highlighted a few features. In one case I went through with it to not hurt feelings but didn't enjoy it very much and felt a bit ripped off. In the other, I simply told her I wasn't feeling it, asked what appropriate recompense for her trouble would be and walked away after paying half her fee. In both those case, I consider myself at fault. They had real and recent pictures of themselves that just didn't show enough. I know that I have particular tastes and I didn't have enough information to make an informed judgement but I rushed in and let myself down. In this case it would be unfair to them to just turn around and walk away. Another situation that could arise is pictures that are very professionally done, perhaps with photoshop touch-ups, etc. These pictures should not be used to form an expectation either because realistically, ain't nobody look as good as a pro photographer can make you look. Personally, I think it's important for SPs to temper those pictures with a few 'real world' type shots (selfies, etc) that are not as polished. Not all do though, so it's really up to you to understand that real women have flaws. You're not perfect either. The final case is a true bait and switch. She is absolutely not what is pictured, described, etc. We're talking, this girl belongs on Cowboy Kenny's page. I don't know what to tell you about that. Never had it happen but I imagine it's a shitty and stressful situation. I like to think I'd nope the fuck right out of there but I'm kind of cowardly and don't like confrontation so I might wind up paying at least some of the fee in spite of it being a scam. I think in a case like that, any money given is just enabling bad behavior. In any event, all the ladies on this site are legit so I'm not sure they can really comment on the third case either. Ultimately, I think that if you make an appointment, you should pay her for her trouble whether you go through with it or not. Unless it's clearly a deliberate scam.

I can try that but it's not that lyla emails are going into the spam bucket. They just never show up at all.

I think some of the attachment problems may be due to people being young or inexperienced or even just in a bad place in their lives. When I first got started 3 or 4 years ago, I was starved for love, affection, attention, etc. So much missing in my life caused me to develop inappropriate feelings that led to much grief. I wasn't able to separate sex and chemistry from real love and attachment. Experience makes such a huge difference. I totally understand what ER means. If there's no chemistry there's no point and there's no way to force it to happen. Only experience, however, will let you understand that you can have tremendous chemistry and really like each other while never forgetting the true nature of the relationship. I enjoy this hobby so much more now that I have no confusion in that regard. I would definitely walk away from any situation in which I felt un-reciprocated 'feelings' were being developed by EITHER party.

I'm kind of weird with tipping. I tend not to in general but if I'm getting a discount for some reason, I tend to tip back up to what the regular price would be. Like, occasionally someone was offering a limited time special or offered a "customer relations" type discount because of some mixup (late or rescheduling an appt, etc.). Then I use the tip to "make them whole" so to speak. My normal inclination would be more towards a gift. I do something similar in restaurants with coupons or whatever. Tip against what it would have been, not what it is. I would also tip if I felt the service was really over and above what I had expected or if, for some reason, I was either late or ran a little over time. I'm usually very scrupulous about not staying late but it has happened once or twice when I lost track of time. How rude! Speaking of rude...this is the 'Ask an Escort' thread...not the 'ask a client' thread. Is it inappropriate for us to participate or should we be strictly asking questions and listening to answers? I'm kind of late to the party and haven't read the first 35 pages or so.

Dude...I'm tapping out. You've successfully beaten me to death with walls of text, knocked my off balance with circular arguments and generally confused me to the point of not even remembering what the heck we were talking about in the first place. I'm pretty sure you're either for or against something...not sure what at this point but I'm stumbling away, a broken and puzzled soul, victim of another round of internet pig wrestling. "I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it." - George Bernard Shaw

I know right? I had an appt this morning that had to be moved because of an emergency and she sent me a PM that I never got because I didn't log in. Thank goodness she texted me when I didn't reply.

Wow...perhaps I was a little harsh. Clearly you've got some shit going on. Good luck dealing with all that. Certainly makes me feel glad to not have those sorts of issues. I would like to address one of your points. I'm pretty sure that PTSD stuff among sex workers is very strongly correlated with the legal/social environment. In places where it's illegal and underground, it's much more dangerous and traumatic but the problems are not inherent to sex work. Just to the fact that working out of cars or on the street exposes one to rapes, beatings, robberies and other things that could give ANYONE PTSD, not just a sex worker. Those who work in safe environments, screen clients, etc. (Thanks Internet!!!) have an outcome similar to any other service worker. The meaning of sex is whatever you attach to it. It's not inherently good or bad. Paying for it isn't good or bad. It just is, was and always will be, what it is.

I finally get it. Why people repeat. Why some ladies have regulars. Seeing Stacy is like seeing an old friend. It had been a while and I was so excited I think I was babbling. Probably talked the poor girls ear off. It's the chemistry though. The comfort, the vibe. You're both on the same page and the encounter just goes so smoothly, everyone relaxed, laughing, having a great time. It's almost painful how attractive I find her. She's got an easy laugh, a happy smile and can easily hold up her end of a conversation. Her new spot is fantastic with easy parking and yet close proximity to the market. I was thinking that on a nice day, I might just want go for a little walk in the area afterwards. By the way, in case you didn't know, she has a massage table now too. I'm not really a big massage guy but she talked me into a bit of a rub when we had some time leftover and you know what? I might be a convert. She's got great hands. So what are you waiting for? Go see her. You won't be disappointed.

Wow...just wow. The only way that you could possibly know this is if you were actively seeking it out. I've never been offered, never asked and, as near as I can tell, would most likely be immediately blacklisted if I did. As you say, perhaps you're trolling a particular 'demographic' but damn...really? The fuck is wrong with you man? This reminds me of all the anti-vaxxers out there. You're not only putting yourself at risk but others as well. Do you not believe in the concept of social responsibility? None of us should ever have unprotected sex in this business and we should all refuse to deal with those who do.

WC, your point is very interesting and a novel way of thinking about it. Perhaps it helps you put a particular perspective for yourself on the 'relationship' that appeals to you. That being said, I think that many might view being thought of that way as condescending. I think quite a few companions take great pride in being fiercely independent business women. They provide a service, advertise, market, manage and operate it in a complex environment with a lot of variables, difficult customers and other challenges. Not implying that your mode of thought is insulting but (putting on my feminist hat), it might be seen as a bit patriarchal. Back to the currently discussed topic. I agree that the majority of companions "breaking up" with clients is due to bad behavior from the client but I can think of at least a couple other reasons. One, retirement. Sometimes people leave the business. And two, getting too attached. I've read right here on CERB and even spoken to ladies who've been in a situation where they found themselves developing feelings for someone and had to break it off. I actually had to do that myself with a friend (not an escort) for whom my feelings were inappropriate and un-reciprocated. I broke it off to protect my heart but it was painful nonetheless and left a big hole in my life. Anyone think of other perfectly innocent reasons why someone would break off the relationship? I know people aren't generalizing but it kind of feels like beat up the client day here.

Still not working for gmail. Ah reputation...so hard to build, so easy to destroy.

Heh. Come on Rebecca...we both know that you like pretty much every part of your body to be touched. You're like a big pussycat and you just purr the whole time. :-D

Oh yes. Especially when she's fit and athletic. I love the little dimples above the hips...mmm...

Thanks Cristy. I just don't want to throw a pity party for myself. It will pass. If nothing else, the way I'm feeling shows that I was in denial about haven fallen for my friend which probably means it was the right decision. Not fair to make my feelings somebody else's problem.

Never mind...this just sounded like I was feeling sorry for myself. Carry on...nothing to see here. Sorry all.

Such a fun girl. Bubbly, friendly, puts you right at ease. I had a great time. I've never met a dancer before so I guess when someone tells you that someone has "a dancer's body", this is what they're talking about. Her incall was very convenient in Kanata with plenty of parking. Everything you could need is there including a super hot lady who will make you forget all your troubles. She definitely knows what she's doing and will really show you a good time.

I recently saw my first 'no kissing' companion and I have to say, while it didn't COMPLETELY ruin the experience, I'll definitely be avoiding that situation in the future. I was actually surprised by how much it bothered me. I guess I had taken it for granted in the past and hadn't thought about it too much. It wasn't something that was discussed up front so I had no way of knowing. I just found it awkward and uncomfortable. Apparently I'm a really kissy guy because I constantly found myself just instinctively going in to kiss and then having her turn away. It was a kind of rejection and it made me feel bad, first of all just because I like to kiss (obviously) but worse, it made me feel like I was being a pest or trying to get her to do something she wasn't comfortable with. It truly was just habitual and instinctive so I kept having to catch myself which really put a damper on the whole thing. It's a shame because otherwise, I really liked her and if it weren't for that, I'd see her again in a heartbeat. All I know is that now it's one more thing on my list of questions to ask before meeting someone new.