mrrnice2

I have been following this thread closely, and get the feeling that some ways of expressing thoughts have been construed in different ways by different people. I know from my little bit of writing thus far that I am trying to be more careful in ways that I express myself. It is so easy to mean one thing with ones words, but then when the words alone are looked at without the ability to see the reasoning behind them, that confusion can occur. So Alex, and all, I hope that this fear does not stop people from posting or starting new threads. For me the forums have been an amazing learning experience, and they are also I trust, causing me to become a better writer. The respect that I have seen here between members is a beautiful thing.

I guess I did not answer this question with my first post. I would have no hesitation to see a SP who is married or in a long term relationship, other than for this one proviso. I believe that my involvement with a SP, even in a one of experience, has an effect on each of us. If a SP is married, I would personally hate to learn later on that their relationship fell apart because of her work, work that I would have played a part in. I know I know that we are all responsible for our own actions, but knowingly or unknowingly we can contribue to things that happen. And, in this society, it may be that it is only the exceptional man who could remove himself from a jealousy factor, and in part, because the SPs that I know have played out the GFE ever so well. And played may not be the right word, because I have always felt that they truely enjoyed their time with me, person to person.

I am so impressed that there are SPs in marriages or committed realtionships and with a partner who IS supportive. For that to be, it has to demonstrate the total respect that one partner has for the other, in terms of giving blessing to the other to persue the life that they wish to have. This ties to an earlier thread about SPs and their social life. It appears that this situation may be rare, and is putting into reality what all couples should strive for. Mutual respect. For those in this situation, congratulations. It must be really comfortable to NOT be leading a double life that it appears as if so many people do.

Why do I always see so many sides or all of the sides on every issue!!!!!! Yes if I keep reminding myself that it is a business enterprise then well deserved recos are justified and appropriate. I did say that I do read recos myself, but a number of posters above have reminded me of what is most important to me in why I actually do make specific contacts with specific people. For me in reality it IS their public participation in the forums, their way of presenting themselves in discussions and their use of the forums to demonstrate that they are intelligent people with more facets than one.

I for one would have no issue with a woman asking that I might post a recco. A request is merely that, and there is no requirement to meet that request. In my opinion a request to do a recco one would assume would come only after having had an exceptional experience together. I would be pretty confident that each SP knows at the end of that encounter if not very early on during an encounter, if it went well, and that the client was leaving on a really positive note. If two people had that degree of connection or intimacy, then I do not think a request, however it is phrased, is out of line. If that intimacy was not there or the vibes were not there, then the request would be out of line, and if the SP can read people well, would know that and not bring it up. For me, as with many things in the discussions on CERB, I see two sides. I for one, DO look at recos. My experience here with members on CERB, SPs and hobbyists alike has been that I see honesty and sincerety and they are of help to me. I have written a couple of reccos, and am not sure that I will do others. And that is probably not the right thing to do because I like to see what others have contributed. For me however, I sometimes feel awkward in being a kiss and tell kind of guy. For me in some ways it does not feel right. That is a respect thing for me. But I also do like to assist some of these amazing women, and if that helps them, then perhaps I should be doing more. I have to sort that out for myself I think. Interesting discussion.

Depending on ones point of view, disappointing news this morning that the Green Party and Elizabeth May have not been invited into the televised debates. The rationale from the networks is that they are only including leaders from the parties that presently have members sitting in the House of Commons. As with many issues I do see both sides. In Canada there are numerous fringe parties, all of which would love an opportunity on the national stage. For me however, a party that received 7 % of the national vote in the last election and a party that has had gains in successive elections should not be described as a fringe party. Their primary issue is of course the environment, but they do in fact have ideas and policy statements in other national areas. The Greens are a national party but they do I believe have affiliations with the other Green parties around the world. These parties in other countries have made significant progress, including the eventual election of some of their members. It takes time and is a slow building process. The environment IS a national issue, and the Greens presence at the debate would be one means of keeping the other national leaders honest in their discussion of this issue. Comments?

So what IS tantric massage?

As another non-dreamer (usually), who on those occassions when I do have them ponders the hidden meanings or subliminal messages, I hear ya. I hope that your writing about it relieved the problem and allowed you to get some sleep. I am most interested in your use of writing to address the issue. I for one find writing to be beneficial and a way to clarify thoughts and things, for myself at least. I have been dealing with a huge personal issue and without my writing I am not sure where I would be at the moment. I just have to learn to keep that writing for my persoanl diary rather than to share with others as much as I do. So when you design your new SP village, don't forget a very important economic side to it. People willing to support it need to be close by! Sleep well. :)

Interesting and informative discussion. It is pretty well leading me to a decision that I know I have to make.

Good or bad, I have held onto my idealism and idealistic view of the world, of Canada and in just about every area, and I guess my posts here on CERB in other areas demonstrate that. However, at this time I AM challenged to maintain a sense of idealism, but I refuse NOT to vote. I have big issues with Stephen Harper and the Conservatives. The main issue is the fact that it is indeed a one person, right wing dictatorship. When one watches question period in the House, and see the parrot responses from the ministers who answer, it frustrates me how supposedly intelligent people can allow themselves to be manipulated by one man. I have issues with Mr Ignatieff. Even prior to the attack ads, I asked myself where did this guy come from? One would have thought that the Liberals would have learned from their experience with Paul Martin. Annointing a leader, someone who has been in the wings and just waiting, did not work then, and certainly not now. I have issues with Mr Layton, and the feeling that he and his party is "blowing in the wind." That leaves two leaders. I TRULY wish that Gilles Duceppe was a national leader of a national, CANADIAN party. He speaks what he believes in, and has the sincerety level that I would like to see from every potential leader. But his politics and gepography leave him out for me. I guess when one has nothing to lose it allows freedom to express oneself? Elizabeth May. A one issue party with the Greens, but an important issue. Again a leader who speaks from the heart and who says what she believes in, regardless of "spin." I refuse to abandon my vote. The Greens have it. Additional Comments: Lets end up with a minority that will force the Liberals, the Conservatives and the NDP into leadership campaigns, with hope that a person with vision and leadership skills and a dynamic vision comes to the fore. The young people of Canada need to step up and exercise their voting franchise and make their views heard and known. And the young people of Canada start probably with just about all CERB members beside me. :) Oh Canada, We Stand on Guard........

The desires of parents for their children has to be difficult. One poster previously wrote that when they were a little girl the choice of a career as an SP was not on the list. Based on the society in which we live, I would doubt that it would be on the list for too many parents for their kids as well. That I believe is probably a reality. The opposing reality is that many women, for whatever reason, have chosen to do this, either in the short term or the long. And THAT puts parents in a spot. For some I expect the ability to support their child in whatever endeavor is just built in. For others, based on who knows what factors, that ability may not be be there initially, or maybe even permanently. We do not know the answer to that. The idea of being rejected by my parents would have been devastating, and the idea of rejecting any of my children is totally foreign to me. All that I can think to say is that for a person who finds themselves in this position and who feels a sense of hurt or loss because of it, then that hurt or loss demonstrates a love and desire for those very same parents. To walk away from them and close the door makes it I would think far harder to open it again in the future. So don't walk away, don't slam the door, and try to maintain even to a minimal degree some level of contact that will be there for a time when peoples opinions change, peoples needs change, and for when people realize that the family is the most important unit of all.

This question has been one that has been in my mind since my initial foray into the world of SP's and hobbyists. As I have said before, I would not want to be taking advantage of another person for any reason. By the mere reality of having two people meet, a personna is portrayed for each of the participants. This personna we must remember is a two way street. The SP and the client each present their own versions of who they are. The reality and honest portrayal is up to each individual to present, or to mask, whatever the case may be. Speaking for myself all that I can do is meet each person and treat them as an individual and give them the same respect that I would like to have myself. If one person at a time, be they SP or hobbyist did that then we all would be better off for it.

Hi Julia. An interesting question and I am reading responses. I guess I am just so curious about the women in the industry. As for myself, there is no one who knows of my involvement with women as SP's. For me it is a private personal thing. That being said, I am really not too concerned about friends finding out. Should that occur, then so be it, and my friends are very supportive of me and I believe would be very understanding because of my personal situation. They understand that for me a relationship is not in the cards, probably ever, and that some personal, intimate interaction is a pretty basic and important part of a persons life. As for my children, that would be a lot more difficult for me, and for them, to have them know. Again it is because of my personal situation, but even my children would understand, after they thought about it and came to terms with my reasons for being here.

Thank you to the ladies for sharing. For some I am sure this is a sensitive topic and one that is incredibly personal to each of you. I continue to be impressed with the candor of the CERB members, both SP's and hobbyists alike in the forums. As one who I realize sometimes thinks and analyzes too much, threads such as this continue to add to my background knowledge and awareness about the people in the industry. The more that I read, hear about, and learn, the more comfortable I am becoming, so thank you to Samantha and others for taking the time to clarify issues and educate me. Knowledge is enlightenment. As I have written elsewhere, my stereotypes are being shattered, and for me that is a good thing. In a perfect world I would wish that women are choosing this profession for reasons such as their enjoyment of working with people, their enjoyment of sex, their wish to be financially independent, their wish to control their own career, working conditions, hours and income. These are all things that people in their more traditional occupations either have or wish that they had. These reasons may not be the reality for all, but whether it be those reasons or whether it be a second choice for a career that will give you those things and thus allow you to move more towards the kind of life that you desire, good luck and best wishes in your work. It is work that for people such as myself, is valued, appreciated and respected. I only wish that I was in the circumstance that would allow me to travel this country and meet so many of you who I am discovering are very fascinating people.

Wow, those links to sexinfo101 up above show me just how many things I have to look forward to Is it appropriate to email those links to someone that I am planning to meet? :) But, in the meantime, can't beat doggy.

I would really not find a lot of eroticism in kissing and making out with a woman who has a cold or who is not feeling well, and I am quite certain that she would feel exactly the same way, quite rightly, if circumstances were reversed! For me, the enjoyment of the experience is to a large degree predicated on the making out part, so if it is not available because of illness on either side, it is FAR more preferable to postpone, andthen be able to really enjoy the time when it does come. Good topic!

For me at this time, this question gives me the opportunity to write what will probably be a multi-faceted response that perhaps should be in its own forum question, however it DOES apply to the question at hand. A preamble to start. I am a relatively new member to CERB, and certainly a new participant in the world of service providers or paid companions, whatever term one cares to use. It is curious that I steer away from the use of the word prostitute, as many others do here, and probably for me and for many others perhaps it is the negative connotation that is associated with the word. I have always been aware of the industry, and knew that it was around me, but until very recently had never felt any desire nor any need to avail myself of the services that are available or to question some of my beliefs about those who do so. My stereotypical view has been shattered and since my stereotypes were quite negative, then that is a good thing. My beliefs about the women who are in the business being there because of drug use, or abuse, or organized crime, or pimps, or desperation seem to be disappearing. I DO question myself however. I want to believe that the women are here because they like people, or because they enjoy sex, or because it is a way of being financially and personally independent, but I really do not know why they are here. I hope that I am not misleading myself, or burying my head in the sand, because the idea for me of taking advantage of someone because they are a victim of unfortunate circumstances is reprehensible to me. One SP recently mentioned to me that for those women who are here because they may be in that situation, that I should look at it as a way of helping someone out. I wonder if that is a question that could be posed in a forum? Even when I say that I am here because of the death of my wife, which I tend to do when I write posts here, I know that I am being judgemental of some others who are hobbyists. I shall have to work more on that perception, because I am confident that all participants in this industry do so for their own personal and valid reasons. As I should not judge myself, neither should I judge others. And nor should the politicians, which brings us to the question at hand. What would I like to see? I would like to see a law that; 1. Provides for an open, safe environment for women and their clients. 2. Provides for opportunity for women to work as self employed individuals or under a business model that is fair and equitable to the employees, with good wages, benefits and health and welfare provisions included. 3. Provides for and encourages attitudes towards the profession in the same way as these are provided for other professionals and blue and white collar workers, without discrimination or negative connotations. 4. Provides for fair wages for the women. For me right now, this industry is not just something that I want to have available, but something that I NEED to have available. It certainly has met some of my physical needs, but also and maybe even more importantly, has met some mental needs. The women here, in my experience, have been wonderful people who have conducted business in the same way that other professionals do - with courtesy, compassion and caring, personal interest and interaction, and service. These are the very same qualities one would expect from your doctor, your mechanic, or anyone else that you purchase a service from. As I say, my stereotypes have been shattered. The idea that I am contributing to and participating in any sort of illegal act is just wrong. I do not in any way feel as if I am participating in anything that is morally wrong and I resent any laws that are in existence or that might be implemented that would make this activity on my part, or on the part of service providers, illegal. Just an opinion.

I have been very fortunate to have met with Angel, and I have to say that I very much enjoyed our time together. She is a really nice person, and perhaps sweet and shy are words that also come to mind. Sweet all of the time, and shy at least initially. Angel is a beautiful young woman with an amazing way about her. I did arrange two hours with her and I am so pleased that I did so. We spent what for some might be for some an inordinate amount of time talking, and with me just holding her, but for me that was as nice and pleasant as anything else that happened in that time period. She was dressed in a very sexy black outfit, complete with stockings and garter belt, and since I am a lingerie lover, it was a perfect choice. One of my absolute favourite things is to see and feel a woman in orgasm, and that she did. I loved her term of feeling "melty." I know that I am not a kiss and tell kind of guy, but I will say that Angel was enthusiastic, not shy in the least in an intimate encounter, loves giving and receiving, and the ASE as she describes it on her web page, is worth exploring. She and I have already discussed our next encounter, and I hope that she is looking forward to it as much as I am. Just as an aside, on her web page she speaks about her favourite charity which is to support a family at Christmas. That touched me a great deal, and I hope that my small contribution to that is added to by others who meet her. She is very compassionate, sincere and has so many great characteristics as a person, that if you have an opportunity, then you should try to make arrangements to spend some quality time with a great young woman.

A Good Thought For St. Patrick's Day Irish Prayer May the road rise to meet you, May the wind be always at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, The rains fall soft upon your fields. May green be the grass you walk on, May blue be the skies above you, May pure be the joys that surround you, May true be the hearts that love you. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

Hello SMQ. I am a totally new member here I believe since your departure and subsequent return. I have been trying to follow the previous threads, and if I have done so, this next statement will make sense. What you were looking for, IS out there. I am only here because I had 37 years with one incredible partner, who is no longer with us. It may be rare, but it is there, and once discovered, unbeatable. Good luck with your return and the future.

Certainly showing my age with this one. When a kid, it was Meccano sets. Girders and braces and nuts and bolts. Another favorite was a small oval Lionel train set.

Samantha. Great forum topic. I am on a real learning curve. There is self discovery at a mental level. There are the unfullfilled fantasies yet to be explored. One area in particular that I am learning about is the fact that women all respond differently. Having had many years with one partner, and having learned her body intimately and how it would respond to just about anything, it is so interesting to find that what "worked" for one woman might not necessarily "work" for another. That is probably pretty obvious, but it has only just hit me as a reality. Soft or hard? Vocal or non vocal? Seduction or raw sexuality? Touch here or touch there? Kiss here or kiss there? What a fun learning experience this is.

Please do post some. I am curious.....

Michaella. I am with you on that one. And especially love cream pie. :)

Show off. LOL :)