Nathalie L

I think it's up to everyone to set their own rates. It's a personal decision, and one based on a lot of factors that we might not necessarily know about. "Do 'they' even know the cost of living in Canada?" I'm assuming you're talking about recent immigrants of migrant laborers? I'm sure they do know the cost of living here, but need to make a certain amount of money to make ends meet. I have no idea, we aren't walking in their shoes after all... Ultimately we can't judge. We don't know anything about their lives or what determined their rates, etc. I don't think it has anything to do with self-respect or fairplay either... it's just people trying to make a living in ways they see fit. These things have a tendency of working themselves out. I'm really sorry it's making life difficult for you, Eve. I think that the really good clients, clients who are respectful and kind, will continue to see the ladies they want, regardless of the cost. I don't think it will drive your prices down at all. People are always transitioning in and out of the industry... Those that stick around (like you) and have good reputations (like you) will be successful in the long run. We need to hold our judgment and be in solidarity with one another. It's a tough industry! Just my two cents, Nat xox

Curious about different types of sex toys, accessories (lubes, massage lotions, etc), safer-sex supplies, and other products related to the sex industry? I know I am ;) POWER (the local sex-workers human rights organization) is hosting a sex toy party in collaboration with Venus Envy Ottawa. Check out their website here: http://venusenvy.ca/Ottawa It is a private party for current and former workers of all genders, all sexual orientations, and for every sector of the industry (massage, dancers, cam workers, etc) with a staff member from Venus Envy who will teach us the ropes (no pun intended) when it comes to sex toys (anal toys, vibrators, dildos, lube, and harnesses, etc). The location is private, please private message me for details. If everyone could bring some food that would be great! BYOB as well :) FYI: Venus Envy offers 10% off sex toys for self-identified sex workers! Sorry gentlemen ;) This event is for workers only, but I promise that it will benefit you all greatly hehe

I think the "I don't want to know..." sentiment is completely legitimate. To open up a conversation about what you are doing, and why, could potentially result in a conversation your significant other is simply not ready to have yet. Ignorance is blissful, to a certain extent, and sometimes the status quo is preferable to change. For a lot of clients in the industry, there are financial dynamics between their significant others' and themselves, children, a property or multiple properties... I'm sure I don't need to tell you how complicated all of that is. Even if there's a glimmer of suspicion, I can totally see why someone would decide not to address it until they are ready (or they have to because it's overt). I guess the thing I like the least, to be honest, is when someone is 'almost caught' and/or 'caught' but feels like they've dodged a bullet and then proceeds to tell me about it. As a service provider and as a woman, I don't actually want to know when some of the clients I've met have dodged their own bullets, or the reasons they give their SOs to come and see me. There are some things about the lives of my clients that I simply don't want to know. I think that's valid. I have great (and I mean great) respect for clients who speak to me of their significant others with respect, and with a nuanced understanding of lives and how complicated they can be. The double life is a difficult one to lead, but I don't necessarily want to be privy to all of the details... I'm really sorry Someguy, but I don't want to hear about the moments where people have almost been caught, or been caught, and what their significant others think of that. It feels really personal and could (potentially) be disrespectful too, no?

Happy birthday RG! :)!

Hopefully I'll see some of you tonight! Xox

...so I was laying in savasna (corpse pose) at the end of my yoga class this evening and was thinking about orgasms. The teacher ended the class with a quote from Ghandi. Something along the lines of "we try to make other people happy in the ways that we want them to be happy. We are too attached to our own ways that sometimes, it's hard to be respectful of peoples processes" (I've paraphrased the quote). I was laying and thinking about how elusive an orgasm can be at times. Sometimes I think people are too attached to getting people off the way they want to get them off, rather than helping them along their own process, or supporting them throughout their own process. Do we stop and think "how can I support this person?" "what does she/he need to get off?" "does that conflict with what I want to get them off?" I think we get really attached to particular images and fantasies. Legs here, body parts there, contortions right, left (no your other left), and center... but is that really ideal? Is that what they want, or what we want? I'm thinking a lot more people would have powerful orgasms if they were supported along their process. I have to admit that I've probably gotten wrapped up in this too, but I want to be more mindful from this point forward. Now Ghandi was abstinent (much later in his life)....but hopefully he won't mind the inspiration ;) Food for thought. Nat xox

Good morning everyone. Happy Monday :) Just a quick reminder that this is happening this upcoming Wednesday. I look forward to seeing new and old faces alike. Cheers, Nat xox

@Nathalie_Ottawa

Wow. This is incredible. I'm teary-eyed looking at how many people have signed this letter in opposition to the criminalization of third parties, and clients, as well as in support of the decriminalization of sex work in Canada. Here's a link to the open letter: http://www.gshi.cfenet.ubc.ca/openletter#.UzRswF7BHw8 My jaw dropped. Over 300 people have signed it! I'm sending a personal thank you letter to those I've come across throughout my own academic career who are supporting this. My heart feels very warm... Nat xoxo

;) it definitely does improve your sex life, just saying! Yoga is an 'ageless' practice (it's both an old practice, and perfect for all ages). Anyone can do it at any point in their life. Everyone should take it at their own pace and only do what they feel comfortable with... A good place to start is www.doyogawithme.com. It's a free website with some classes that are good for beginners.

There will be a current and former sex-worker only social from 7:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. on Wednesday April 2nd. It is open to sex-workers from any sector of the industry including erotic massage, escorts, cam workers, erotic dancers, people who offer BDSM services, phone workers, agency workers, and independents, etc. It is also open to any person of any gender and sexual orientation. There will be vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free snacks available. Please feel free to drop by for 15 minutes and then leave, or stay for the entirety of the two hours. Please PM me for the location (same location as usual). Again, this is for workers only (current and former). Thanks, Nat xox

I understand this must be rather frustrating for you. When we have an intimate connection with someone, and spend a couple or a few hours intertwined with someone both physically and emotionally, it's hard to not have expectations or desire something more. (More is vague, but I think everyone knows what I mean). It's true that everyone is busy, but people (in general) are usually selective about who they are friends with. This happens both in the industry, and outside of it. I'm certain you don't talk to every friend on your Facebook, just the ones you really care about, right? I'm not suggesting these SPs don't care about you, but I can only imagine how frustrating it gets to receive these sorts of PMs, texts, and e-mails continuously from every client, when most of those clients never book an appointment with them again. We all learn from experience, and there are a lot of people in this industry who will see a girl once and then never see her again, but expect texts, e-mails, and friendly PMs. I don't think that's a fair expectation to have. Once you've established a regular connection with an SP or MA, that's a different story, but when you've only seen someone once? That's a bit more complicated to navigate, and will definitely be dependent on how busy the worker is (both personally and professionally). I know it sucks, but that's the way it is =( You're definitely not the only one that feels that way, but we all learn with experience. I really hope you find what you're looking for, Nat xox

I really love taking selfies. I blame my iPhone and Twitter for that. ;) I think professional photoshoots are really important, but I don't think having non-professional photos on CERB or on your website is indicative of how you spend the money you make in this industry (i.e. on drugs). That's a bit ridiculous, right? I guess I can't assume to know what clients think, but I would hope they would have a more nuanced understanding of this industry than that would suggest. When I first started on CERB all of my photos were selfies. I coasted along that way for over a year. I didn't even have a website! I was a full-time undergraduate student working as an escort on the side and was using the money to pay off student debt. How people decide to invest their money is their own concern, and not ours to judge. I'm not going to lie though, I'm addicted to professional photoshoots now. I love working with different photographers and I really enjoy tweaking and updating my website. I have a 'selfies' album on CERB but not on my website... I think it adds a lot and gives a glimpse into your life (the selfies that is) :)

You're in my heart, my dear. While funny in retrospect, that must have been scary! <3 <3

Good morning everyone, I simply wanted to take a moment to apologize for not being able to participate on the board as much as I have in the past. I miss it, but really need to focus on writing my thesis over the next couple of months. I defend my thesis in August, which means I have to finish writing it by June. I'm feeling the pressure! I can't wait to finish my master's degree. It will be such a relief! Then I'll take a year off to contemplate whether I move on the PhD or seek another type of employment (we shall see). Anyway, suffice it to say, I'm a master procrastinator (procrasturbator) ;) I've even read books about why people procrastinate. Le sigh. I'm still posting in the advertising section, I just don't have time to participate on the board as much =( I'll be back though, for sure, and I still read stuff when I can Nat xoxox

Just a reminder that this is happening this upcoming Wednesday :) PM me if you would like to know the location. Thanks! Nat xxx

There will be a sex-worker only social from 7:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. on Wednesday March 5th. It is open to sex-workers from any sector of the industry including erotic massage, escorts, cam workers, erotic dancers, people who offer BDSM services, phone workers, agency workers, and independents, etc. It is also open to any person of any gender and sexual orientation. There will be vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free snacks available. Please feel free to drop by for 15 minutes and then leave, or stay for the entirety of the two hours. Please PM me for the location (same location as usual). Again, this is for workers only. Thanks, Nat xox

I wish I had more time to post, to be honest. I have a variety of things that compete with my time, such as writing my thesis, my work as a research assistant, my yoga practice, etc. I find it really hard to find time to post on forums which is why I write in my blog more often. I know how important it is for people to get a general sense of who we are beyond what we write on our websites, etc. I hardly tour and sometimes I find it difficult to keep up with all the boards. I can only imagine how much time and energy it takes for those that tour multiple cities across Canada to keep up a board presence. I really (really) admire them a lot. This is completely unrelated, and I hope this isn't a hijack RG, but it reminds me of when people say that being an escort is 'easy money'. They're so foolish! There is so much involved in attracting the kinds of clients you like and will enjoy spending time with (blogs, website maintenance, photo shoots, screening, e-mailing, forum posting, etc). Anyway, while I definitely understand how fun it is to interact with ladies online, it's not so easy sometimes. A lot of people in the industry have blogs now too and I think that's a really good way to balance it all :)

I wrote my post on this thread about 9 months ago. It's interesting to see what's shifted since then, and in what direction. At least for me, the boundaries between all the different facets of my life shift continuously. Sometimes they are firmer, sometimes they are less firm. Sometimes I feel like I can share everything, and sometimes I feel like I can't. Depends on the context, on the people present, and on my own state of mind. My last post was a lot firmer - "I don't live a double life" - because I believed I lived my life with a certain degree of integrity. I think now I'm coming to realize that sometimes, my life (be it the fact I'm an escort, or a research assistant, or a student) is no ones business. We all have a right to privacy, including the privacy of our thoughts. What I've written might seem obvious to most, but I feel like I'm constantly growing and learning how I want to live my life... I think about this sort of stuff a lot!

Last reminder :) this is happening tonight at 7:30 p.m. If you would like to attend please e-mail me because I will not have CERB access for most of the day. My e-mail is [email protected] Hope to see you there, Nat

I agree with NJ, I don't think non-monogamy (ethical or unethical) is really a factor in this decision. Unless the woman you're talking about initiates the blurring of boundaries between her personal and professional life, then there's nothing you can say or do. If you initiated something it could (and probably would) be perceived negatively. It would put her in an awkward position. I think it's important to remember that just because she's being paid to spend time with you (through lap dances, etc), that doesn't mean she can't have authentic feelings for you. Life is complicated, and this industry is complicated. If you feel you need to move away from that scene to get perspective than do it, but yeah, cheating has nothing to do with it even if you have feelings for her. Additional Comments: Also, I do think there's such a thing as cheating on a sex worker in a general sense. The fact that I see clients in my professional life doesn't mean that a personal partner can't cheat on me (monogamy/non-monogamy is more nuanced than that). I know that's not what you're referring to though, but I thought I would just put it out there.

J'aime beaucoup se q'il a dit, Patrice Corriveau. Je me demande s'il travaille avec Christine Bruckert, une criminologue à l'université d'Ottawa qui travaille avec l'organism à but non-lucratif POWER ici à Ottawa pour les travailleur/euse du sexe. Il font tellement du bon travaille. Je m'en doute pas qu'un modèe suédois vais être introduit au Canada... malgré cette article et la perception des gens. Je suis d'accord avec Corriveau que c'est surprenant, but are we fooling ourselves? Je sais pas. Je commence à être cynic un peu!

I'm on a low-carb diet right now, but not a no-carb diet like the Atkins diet. I'm also not following this diet for weight-loss purposes. I'm on a high-protein diet to increase my muscle mass a little bit because I'm training for some intense cycling this summer! I still eat rice, but it's brown rice, and I still eat bread but I eat flax-seed enriched bread (for fiber intake). I'm really enjoying it! Like Savannah, I don't really diet. I don't own a scale at home but I judge my weight by how good I feel about myself. I also judge my weight by how snug my jeans feels. Nothing is worse than needing to buy new clothing because you've gained too much weight. It's a good barometer for me. If weight loss is your goal, dieting really is the key. Isn't weight loss 80% diet and 20% exercise? That's what I've heard somewhere anyway... It's definitely true that weight loss is about changing your life, and not changing how you eat for 12 weeks. It's too easy to put it back if you don't do a drastic change (but it can be a gradual change, right?) At the moment I'm really lucky. I can pretty much eat whatever I want whenever I want but I've noticed that my desire to eat tons of crap has dissipated with age. That's good, because from what everyone tells me, as I age it'll be harder for me to keep the weight off!

Just a quick reminder that this is happening this upcoming Wednesday. It's open to all sex workers regardless of the sector of the industry you're in. Please send me a private message if you would like to know the location. I'm really looking forward to seeing some new faces, Nat xox

I hope this gets '0' traction. I love using Twitter and blocking our accounts will do absolutely nothing to prevent exploitation in the context of sex work. Human trafficking and consensual sex work between adults gets conflated all the time. It's so (so) frustrating. If anyone is curious about 'human trafficking' and what some folks are saying about it. I would suggest reading The Naked Anthropologist.