Kilt Boy

I don't want to appear hypocritical, so I'm amending this list of unacceptable activities to accommodate my typical behaviour. Taking a critical look at this list, I guess I'm just mostly against valve work (mouth/vagina/anus). NOW ACCEPTABLE - lifting/opening my shirt to nibble, lick, suck my nipples. - guiding my hands to naughty places to initiate insertion. - reaching under the kilt to massage me manually with hand(s). - pushing the kilt up to my waist to massage me with boobs. - tenting the kilt over my erection and using that as a platform to stimulate her, possibly using hand(s) to rub me back and forth on her. - full-contact dry humping. STILL UNACCEPTABLE - standing in the chair and grinding into my beard while holding my head with both hands, full-contact. - licking my face, ears, neck. - deep kissing. - using a kerchief over my exposed penis to perform short bursts of oral sex. - as above, but without the kerchief. - attempting actual penetration. - spitting.

There was an episode of Better Off Ted (an excellent show) that had a similar exchange. A white guy was hitting on an Asian gal and said that he found her exotic. She said that there were many more Asians than whites, so if anything ... HE was the exotic one. I guess it depends on your perspective. Also, there's a difference between exotic and desirable.

I don't think he meant it in a seriously negative way, but more as a slightly drunk, throw-away conversational point. Still, I remembered it and am giving the concept some thought.

Who else is going to be at the OMGWTFBBQ on Friday? If so, don't forget to make a reservation. I'm not kidding. It's gonna be packed! I'll be holding court with my regular posse at a row of low tables in front of the bar. Feel free to introduce yourself. I'll be the guy in the dress, covered head-to-toe with ladies.

A couple of weeks ago I was at my local dance hall and a friend I was out with called me a racist. That made me think. The details of the exchange are that I show a certain amount of love for ladies within a certain range of skin colouration. This is well known both to myself, my friends, and a shedload of dancers. I'll dance with just about anyone, but I have a preference. Does this make me racist? Keep in mind that I'm not using the politically charged 'common' definition of that hated word. Try to think about what that word means before adding any comment, please. I'm not trying to start a political firestorm. I'd prefer a rational discussion. When I think of the word racist, I think of a person who is exclusionary. I am merely preferential. I like one thing more than the others instead of hating all but one thing. Is there a word for that? I don't want to use the word 'racial' because that has its own problems. I'd like to be able to respond to any further discussion of this nature with something like, "I'm not racist, I'm preferential," without sounding like a complete turd. Is that even possible?

Exactly right! HA HA!

DEEEE-licuous!

Word has gotten around in the club that I've been doing massage for 30+ years and I seem to have to end all CR sessions with a couple of extra song's worth of back, butt, and shoulder rubbing. I mentioned it to one of my regular girls for whom I had never done this before, and she said that I had gotten a bit of a reputation. A good one. Yeah, they're starting to ask ME. In fact, the last time I went, one girl grabbed me on her way INTO the club, set me up in a booth and then stripped off her street clothes so I could relax her before she started work. Maybe I should speak with management and set up a table in the change room. Actually, it might work out on the floor. I'm sure that there are some guys out there who would pay a little extra to see a girl lubed up and relaxed under my expert handling. It's happened before.

The most metal video of all time, with power-twerking that will apparently send you on an acid trip to the past. Mastodon - The Motherload I got the impression that the director kind of forgot what he was doing halfway through and just rented a bunch of strippers for the afternoon instead.

Skype pls?[emoji9]

I was talking to one of my regular dancer friends and she mentioned something that troubled me. I've talked here about it before, which is why I probed her further for more information so I could relate her position. I had been in on a previous occasion and bought her a drink, as I usually do. I know what she wants and had it ready for her. She did her stage act and came to say hello quickly, took the drink and said that she'd be back. She never came back. I noticed her at the bar with another patron. She never left his side, nor went to the fun room. They both stayed at the bar, drinking and talking. It didn't make me angry. I figured she knew what she was doing and knew I was around if she had time for me. A couple of hours later, she had changed and left the club. We're pretty tight, so I know that she didn't suddenly decide that she didn't want to spend time with me. There was something else going on. I asked her about it the next time we were together and she explained that she wasn't sure what to do about the situation either. This was a regular customer who paid her for her time. It was "for sure" money. If she was walking the floor, that was "maybe" money. She remembered that I had bought her a drink and said that her patron had gotten upset that she spent those 2 minutes with me during his time. He was jealous of her when they were both in the same room. He watched her like a hawk when she had to go to the bathroom and made her stand outside the men's when he had to go so that she wasn't too far away. That's creepifying on a whole different level. I told her about another dancer friend I know who had to "fire" a patron and that that may be something worth considering. Refusing to take his money/business may be the best option available to her. That conversation would quickly turn ugly and could have some very predictable and nasty secondary effects: angry outbursts, violence, screaming, stalking, etc. Still, it is my position that if you are afraid FOR ANY REASON, you should break off an engagement/appointment.

Yeah, sure. I'd tape my credit card to the back in case someone needs a second piece of ID on the trip.

I think you can get it in large bottles with a pump on top. If not, I'm sure you could rig something up. I see them at the dentist.

Next time I see you, baby. Thanks for checking for me.

I spent a lot of time with Trina, Eva, and Jewels. Not a second wasted. We all decided that coconut rum with pineapple juice is delicious. Then, I met Honey. She's slight, and pale, and hung off me like jewellery. Upstairs, she danced and froliced and teased me with a delightful show that edged me on toward further depradation. We parted as friends and I can think of no better way to end the week: more than slightly drunk and with a raging erection that will go into the record books. I need a nap.

"Oo, these young dancers today!" * shakes cane at the stage *

Are we talking about Jell-O wrestling again? Because I'm all for that. DIBS ON BEING REFEREE!

I'm embarrassed to say what my best day was, but probably pretty close if we're using constant 1986 dollars. Hey, the inflation calculator shows it pretty close to your number!

To sum up: Dancers dance with whomever they want and discourage the others. Unless they don't. Some dancers are less restrictive than others and will dance with anyone. Patrons choose who they want to dance with and should discourage any dancer they don't want to waste the time of. Unless she just wants to chat. Unless you don't want her to. Etcetera. It isn't black and white. You can't say what will work or what is the best method because it is all about the interaction. No 2 people are going to interact the same. People are people, not machines. Emotions are a huge variable as well as each person's goals and ideals. None of this is news. What I've found works the best is to look the other person in the eyes for a full second to make a clear connection and take your time while making a deliberate and measured, polite response. If you really are waiting for someone, say so. If you are just in for a beer, say so. If you think you might get some dances later, say so but don't make any promises. If you want to be left alone, say so politely. Let her know if you're interested, offer her a drink, and let her know if it doesn't look promising. If he says he wants to be left alone but dances with someone else, don't be upset. He changed his mind or was simply MORE interested in someone else. It could be preference, it could be that her kung fu is stronger than yours. It could be her choice of footwear. It doesn't mean he LIED to you. I mean, maybe he did, but is it worth it to you to stay angry and ruin your whole day? Shake it off and try again. I have a preference and will turn down ladies who I find very attractive, but just don't feel like taking upstairs. However, if the third non-preferred girl asks me and the girl I want is really busy with someone else, I might say yes. I might track/flag down one of the others. Who can say? Not everyone is like me. Some restrict themselves to one girl only. I just don't think it's productive to try to make a flowchart out of the possible scenarios. The variables are too many and too unpredictable. However, be polite, respectful, and put on a fucking smile. You have no idea how much love I get with just those few things. That goes for both sides. I actually believe in honesty. Not BRUTAL honesty, but the truth of the moment. I may say, "Sorry, but it just isn't in the cards for us today" instead of, "Jesus, back off the body spray a bit". Oh, and maybe try some deodorant. [emoji13]

My momma taught me that if a woman is taking her clothes off and performing for you, you smile and clap. Good show or no.

Sorry Zazzle. You got it wrong. Although ... now I want one, too.

If you show up at my table next time with a bunch of conversation cards, I'm going to laugh so hard.

I had an interesting exchange with an out-of-town dancer a couple of weeks ago. I had never seen her before, and we started in with the usual lines and she asked if she could sit down. Sure. I didn't know anything about her and wanted to hear more. After only a couple of minutes, I mentioned that I didn't think I'd be taking her for any dances and she blew up at me. "Why did you ask me to sit down if you didn't want to take me for dances? I HATE talking!" She left and sat by herself for an hour. Could just be a bad day. Could be she's psychologically unfit for this type of work. I guess what I'm saying is that there is no right/wrong way to do things. What works with one person at one time may not work with that person a second time or with another person at all. SUMMARY: Women. Can't live with 'em ... and yet they're everywhere. [emoji13] Also, I may change my mind during my stay. I've told 3 girls no, but then decide yes. I'm allowed. That's why I like to say, "Not right now, but I'll let you know if I change my mind."