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You can't really write an honest review on Lyla if it is anything other than a recommendation. I have found external reviews on other sites to be very useful when deciding who to avoid.

Cleanliness, punctuality, and not caking on the makeup/lying about their age, how are those "preferences"? You are absolutely right, it's not like ordering a pizza. Pizza is an object, it's more like calling a plumber ;) Additional Comments: You take this way too seriously white knight, I'm just having a chuckle :biggrin: Additional Comments: Do you really think I would reveal my user name to providers? I'm a perfect gentleman in real life, you'll never know it was me that ruffled your feathers online ;) Additional Comments:

Yeah, I know what it "IS". I'm just saying it would be great if it was above board and run like a proper business, though I'm sure there are many escorts who play by proper business rules even though they don't need to. What makes escorting so special that it shouldn't be regulated and above board, why don't escorts need to play by the rules that every other business owner does? Don't worry dear, I don't contact escorts with my lyla handle, in real life I'm a perfect gentleman, the internet is the only place I can actually get away this kind of crap :biggrin: Additional Comments: The worst of the false advertising is probably when the older gals cake on the makeup for the photoshoot, and then don't bother to wear any for the main event. I've seen 2 girls that did that and the makeup easily concealed 10-15 years of wrinkliness (you can guess which age they used in their ad too ;) ) I don't have a problem with it, we all get wrinkly eventually, but if your going to fake it in the photos then why would you think it would go over well when you show up without it?

Perhaps I am, but you still don't have a leg to stand on. Why is it okay to tell clients they should bathe, be respectful, and other obvious things, but it's a great crime to mention that escorts should do the same? I've met myriad girls with unnecessary delays/excuses, unwashed, and just generally carrying a sense of entitlement because why not, they hold all the cards ;) The warning/reporting threads are little more than decoration around here, I've tried to utilize this in the past to report a dangerous encounter/theft to no avail, even after messaging the moderator directly requesting advice. That dangerous escort is still unknown to this community, and will remain so, because I do not share undeserved information ;) To be honest I think both forum threads are rather petty and insulting, I just wanted to see if anyone would make the connection or if they would automagically jump to the defense of one and condemn the other. You might have proven my suspicions my good man ;)

I'm not going to reply directly to either of you, my goal here is none other than to speak my mind within the rules, contribute to the community via escort recommendations, and gather whatever information I find useful. I only need an account here for 2 of the 3, so getting along with everyone isn't necessarily in my best interests. This thread only mirror's the "how to be a good client" thread, which I've found useful in the past. Perhaps escorts new to the game might find some use in this thread, in any case you really can't argue against this thread without condemning the other. In summary, you may sheath your swords white knights, I'm sure the ladies can handle themselves ;) Additional Comments: The business analogy applies, a service provider is a service provider regardless of their trade. Let's go with a plumber analogy instead then ;) If my toilet is clogged, I'd prefer the plumber be punctual, or offer a free plumbing. Until escorting is above board clients won't really have any customer rights though, so I suppose I'm just talking at the wind :p Additional Comments: Can I borrow a shovel :biggrin: Sure, I`m poking a bit of fun here, but it is honest fun. It can certainly be argued that our beloved escorts hold all the cards when it comes to how well they run their business, no accountability whatsoever. I`m not really sure I can even support the industry any more until I see some customer rights. We can form a client rights union gents, who`s with me?

Has the other thread become an endless rant? I found it useful back when I was a newbie. I suppose honesty is tricky, I should specify honesty in advertising. I think there are reasonable excuses for most anything on my list. Of course I don't expect someone to divulge their personal life story or miss a medical emergency/death in the family to take my call. I just added the response thing in there because I recently confirmed an appointment with someone 2 days ago, and they didn't show up at all after 2 hours. I sent them one final text that they still haven't replied to. I wasn't badgering them either, just a couple texts wondering when they would be showing up. I respectfully disagree, I think it's just common courtesy for someone running a business to be on time and to communicate. If I order a pizza and it shows up 45 minutes late or not at all, I get a free pizza (and no ladies I am not saying it is like ordering a pizza :) )

Really I couldn't resist. Not sure if this will go over as well as the "How to be a good client" thread, but it's worth a try. Not really too much difference between this and the other thread, but I'm sure plenty of people will have good suggestions that I haven't thought of. Here's my personal list: Honesty, client's should want to see you for who you are, not for who you want to imply you are. Cleanliness, that includes yourself and your incall ;) Be respectful, and attentive, make sure your client feels comfortable with discussing their desires in your company. Be on time and communicate, can't put into words how frustrating it is when someone is 2 hours late and won't even return a text, grrrrr. That's it for me, have fun with it folks!

Not at all Kathryn. I am happy to hear dissenting opinions, but you need to at least address what I have written and explain your reasoning. It appears that you didn't take the time to read what I have written before making assumptions about my experience with this woman. You are quick to jump to her defense, and assume that I just didn't communicate well enough or that I just didn't enjoy myself and wasn't willing to submit to her. Those assumptions aren't in line with my experience, nor the discussion I have started here. I didn't just have a bad experience, I had issues with establishing the line between consensual and non consensual domination. I didn't have my boundaries disrespected because I was unwilling to communicate with this woman beforehand, the line of communication simply wasn't offered to me beforehand (which is admittedly when I should have walked away). Even then I do encourage experimentation in encounters of this type. I don't take issue with her working in fun activities that I hadn't considered, but if she is going to do so then she shouldn't be surprised when the immersion in the role play is occasionally broken, to establish boundaries. You are correct in that it is wrong of me to think I can just stop the discussion now, and I do welcome your input, but you first need to understand my point of view by carefully reading what I have written, before you can provide a convincing argument for your own point of view. My main point of argument here is that a safe word should always be an option and should always be respected. If a particular provider doesn't like having the immersion broken by use of a safe word, even when she is trying things that I haven't agreed to, then I'll just politely move on to someone else. Perhaps others will get along just fine with this woman if they do not feel the need to enforce their limits in the way I chose to. I'm aware there are some who give up access to safe words and limits entirely, even choosing to enter into 24/7 dom/sub relationships. Personally I think they are insane, but to each their own right?

I completely agree, it certainly gave me some psychological issues to work through, as I did enjoy the activities and feel conflicted that I enjoyed domination from someone I couldn't put my trust in. I wasn't about to try and negotiate a refund though, the law may not be entirely on my side if she were to get them involved, and I wasn't feeling in the mood to be standing up to a woman who is actually more physically imposing than I am :p I'm not going to pretend i'm not partly responsible for this. I should have talked more to her on the phone, maybe I would have caught onto her tone and reconsidered before I even went to see her.

My goodness that is some beautiful imagery, why does Winnipeg have to be so very far away from Nova Scotia :icon_sad: Very good points as well, how incredibly insulting for someone to assume that emotional disconnect is what makes a "real" "professional" dominatrix, particularly since "professional" only indicates they require monetary compensation for their time. Last I checked, I am very much expected to pay for the experience :D Additional Comments: Either you agree that use of a safeword is nothing to be ashamed of when the sub believes boundaries have been crossed, or you do not agree with this. If you do not agree with this then you are free to find someone else to dominate. Never mind the fine details, or how often I may have used the safe word, that wasn't my point in this discussion and that should be evident if you read my words. I certainly communicated my desires and boundaries before the roleplay. It is ridiculous to expect the sub to foresee all of the possible activities the dom might choose to engage in, and to address them all clearly before the roleplay. I am not a mind reader, that's precisely why safe words exist. Address the argument, don't try and twist the words and veer off into some other discussion, it is very much a black and white topic. Perhaps if she had bothered to listen to what I had to say in open communication before the roleplay, then we wouldn't have had a problem. I didn't halt the scene momentarily to demand that she do this, or do that. I very much submitted to her control throughout right up until she crossed the line (and even after the second time she crossed the line) Someone who wishes complete control at all times and is not open to non coercive communication before or even during a roleplay is not a dominatrix, they would better fit the definition of a sociopath. Discussing details of this encounter was probably a mistake on my part, so I will no longer do so. It is obvious that personal biases are playing a role in some of the responses I am getting here.

You seem to be harboring an incredibly confrontational tone towards me? Perhaps you are still resentful regarding our dissenting opinions in the first thread that I started here at Lyla. If you intend to try and make this personal, I have to give fair warning that I don't take any debate seriously enough to let it effect my view of the person behind the words. Moving on to your view of escorts. Just because you choose to run your business with a large degree of detachment from clients, does not mean everyone chooses to do so. I have met with some escorts who are perfectly fine to let a friendship develop as well as a degree of emotional intimacy. Other escorts I have met with are right to the point, very disconnected, choosing to maintain emotional distance at all costs. I respect their right to do so but I tend to only visit with these individuals once. Again I will say that polyamory has become a rather all encompassing term. I do agree that the word implies "multiple loves", but it's application blurs the line between love and physical intimacy. You are speaking in absolutes, which unfortunately doesn't often reflect reality. Many different people see escorts for myriad different reasons, and the relationships that develop are not dictated by some sort of escorting rulebook. In the end it really boils down to the same point I made in the bad domination thread. It's my money, and I want what I want, if a particular escort can't at least play the role of an emotionally connected person, then I'll just take my $ elsewhere, no harm no foul ;)

I'm not sure what you mean? The girl I am seeing now is the polar opposite of the woman that I didn't get along with last time, which can only be a good thing as far as I'm concerned. The cuddling and chatting is in preparation for a roleplay, building trust and establishing limits. Are you trying to say that someone can't be kind/caring outside of a roleplay, and dominant when the roleplay begins? That sounds somewhat unhealthy to me, but then again there are people who are supposedly "happy" in 24/7 sub relationships, who am I to say whether or not they are just in a state of Stockholm syndrome. I don't think I'll be doing anything extreme enough to require a contract at this time, but I'll keep it in mind. Additional Comments: Verbal domination: Providing commands/direction vocally. Verbal humiliation: Vocalized belittling remarks/comments. Poking fun, calling names, etc. Perhaps I didn't make the difference clear to her in the beginning, but I only had 5 minutes to do so and she maintained her exasperated tone during this time. I'm not particularly convinced that she was paying much attention to what I was saying before we started the roleplay, as she also missed several fun activities that I requested. That doesn't really matter though, to anyone who may wish to argue with me on this topic, I'll make it perfectly clear in a way that leaves no room for argument: I paid her for my desired experience. I politely stopped the scene only when it was necessary to explain to her (in a perfectly reasonable tone) that I did not desire a specific activity she was currently engaging in. That should be the end of it, no room for discussion, no room for argument on her part. I know what I want from the roleplay, and I will not be told that I am being unreasonable, or that I should just "shut up and take it". My money, my rules, no exceptions (though I do of course respect the limits/boundaries of others). /thread :)

Think I have found a new dom who seems to be a lot more emotionally connected. I made the decision to spend a half hour session with her just cuddling up together and discussing my ideal domination scenario. I feel like it is going to work out a lot better this time, I haven't trusted a woman this much in quite some time. Won't have an update for at least a few days, I need to order myself a nice collar and leash before the fun can begin :D

Well, there were some other points I wanted to address, but I'm too slow so I'll probably miss a couple for now. 1) Sex and intimacy is indeed an expectation in marriage, whether that is right or wrong is another debate, but I suppose if one spouse isn't holding up their end of the bargain they agreed to, then that can be considered justification for a null contract. Even though people may remain in marriages for the good of kids/finances, the marriage terms could technically be considered null and void and sex outside the marriage could then be justified. 2) Sex and intimacy are 2 different things as far as I am aware. Sex can be a way to express intimacy, or sex can just be sex without emotional context. I find it interesting that some people may see escorts looking for one, and some see escorts looking for the other, often depending upon the life circumstances of the client. Personally I have tried to see escorts for intimacy/emotional connection (being a fairly introverted man having difficulty on dating sites/real life encounters), however I always hit a mental block with intimacy. Specifically I end up questioning whether the intimacy is real because it is bought and paid for. I wouldn't pay someone to be my friend, so I have a tough time paying someone for intimacy/emotional connection rather than just funny business. 3) I think we might be taking the third topic a little too far, and still not really finding any answers. It's a topic that may very well be debated for many years or decades to come. It's probably time to reel in the premise on this topic, so I want to address the fact that going without sex is not equal to being locked in an isolation cell ;) Also, since we know that sex is not the same thing as intimacy, we can't really say that going without sex will drive someone insane. If someone has plenty of healthy relationships in their life, and other forms of intimacy, and masturbates regularly, I would say they can be a sane and productive member of society. I know this because I lived this way for 10 years as a virgin, and the only thing that was driving me to have sex was a curiosity about women. When I say "if women didn't exist", I don't mean if they were to suddenly disappear. What I am saying is if women never existed at all and yet I still had a "sex" drive, then it would really just be a masturbation drive. This gives some merit to the fact that some men isolate themselves from women in society and live a celibate life, they do not isolate themselves from human contact mind you. I have to say this has certainly been an enlightening conversation for me, I tried to keep my personal bias out of it and it's probably a good thing I did, because the reality doesn't line up with my personal assumptions regarding marriage ;) I think i've developed a compulsive thanking disorder since joining Lyla, "Need to give just one more thanks, I swear this is the last one :p"

Yes, I'm aware of nocturnal emissions/wet dreams, but doesn't that sort of go against what you are saying? It's an indication that if you don't have sex for a period of time, your body will naturally take action, and relieve the buildup. One could also argue that masturbation would take care of this as well, as you say. So while we do have sexual needs, we don't necessarily need to have sex. However, sex does release chemicals in the brain that masturbation does not, it is said that sex provides greater long term satisfaction vs masturbation, I'm incredibly intoxicated right now, otherwise I would post links to back up my statements (a task for tommmmmorrrrrrow, he drunkenly slurred :D) Additional Comments: Yeah, I've had way to much to drink tonight for sure, so many good posts here, I'll get back to all of you once I sleep this off, sweet dreams everybody ;)