Boomer6570

Agree. I am seeing the change. One club that I have visited off and on over the years is now toxic. The dancers bicker, and complain, and back stab right in front of customers. I never would have seem that until fairly recently. It spoils the fun atmosphere and drives customers away. The young dancers do not seem to see the big picture, which is that they will ruin their own business if they continue to carry on this way. Take the in fighting behind closed doors and do let the customers see it. Perhaps the managers do have to lay down the law and keep a lid on things.

And yet I have encountered dancers that like to talk with me--as well as those who definately do not. I have spent hours in conversation with one well reviewed dancer on this forum. The reason is we have a particular interest in common. That is one trick, find a subject that the dancer is interested in. Yes , I have bought dances from her and drinks for her, several times. Some dancers have or are taking college or university courses. I have too and that can be lead to interesting discussions on what we have learned. Most convos I have had with dancers take place during slow times at the club. Early on I mention two things, 1) if I should ask a personal question that you do not wish to answer-say so . No offence taken and we will just move on to something else.If you ask me something I do not want to answer, the same rule will apply. 2) Even though the club is slow now, if you spot someone who has come in and you want to approach to make money, break off our conversation and go check him out. We can resume another time if we both want to. Another tip for guys--do not offer advice to the dancer unless/until she asks for it. Men see themselves as problem solvers and tend to jump in with unasked for advice. Women don't like that. Women will seek advice only from someone they have grown to like, respect, trust. An example. A well known veteran dancer that I have engaged at clubs for a couple of years (talked to, bought dances from and drinks for) has done well. She has now started to put money into the stock market. She knows I am a long time DIY investor. I have never ever suggested that that I can or want to give her any advice. I am not a pro and not qualified to give pro advice. Yet twice in the past month she has approached me, told me what she has done so far, and asked me to explain a couple of things to her. I did not ask for this confidence. Chat up dancers? Men should read. Books such as "Men are from Mars, and Women are from Venus" or "He Says , She Says" . They are eye openers and explain how men and women use language differently and how that leads to endless misunderstandings; some of which are avoidable if you know the rules. Try to be a gentleman and never a drunken lout.

divachannel asked Well diva---I am an old guy who does treat one of the establishments as my local bar. I have long lived pretty close to it. The food there is surprisingly good so I sometimes go for lunch or dinner. Dancers that I like and have gotten used to seeing me sometimes sit with me for some food or drink and conversation. I do sometimes buy dances from the ones I like. I do not focus on one dancer but spread it around. Some dancers who have known me for awhile have had me drive them home, because they know I drink very sparingly and do not get drunk. Rarely, I take one out for lunch for a change. Several times I have hired a dancer to clean my home in her spare time for a little extra money for her--and like most guys, I don't like housework much. Yeah, so sometimes I go to a SC just for a drink because I think of it as my local bar. Think of it this way. Many posters here write that the SC business in Ottawa is in a decline. The clubs need to sell more food and drink to make it worthwhile to stay in business, So even if a customer does go in just to buy food or drink, he is helping keep the club in business and that in turn gives you a place to work. But as I said , I do buy dances when I am in the mood and there is room in my budget for it.