Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Number 10

Life is sexually transmitted.

 

Number 9

Good health is merely the slowest possible

rate at which one can die.

 

Number 8

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny.

If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich ..

 

Number 7

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day,

teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

 

Number 6

Some people are like a Slinky ...

not really good for anything, but you

still can't help but smile when

you shove them down the stairs.

 

Number 5

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,

lying in hospitals, dying of nothing.

 

Number 4

All of us could take a lesson from the weather.

It pays no attention to criticism.

 

Number 3

Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00,

and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

 

Number 2

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.

Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

 

And The Number 1 Thought

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers;

what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

 

- - - and as someone recently said to me: "Don't worry about old age;

it doesn't last long."

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest s******ecan****

All very good

 

 

One that I came across recently

 

 

"In your 20's and 30's you're always worried about what people think of you"

 

"In your 40's and 50's you don't care what people think of you"

 

"In your 60's and 70's you finally realize no one has been thinking of you the whole time"

 

 

Another

 

On their deathbed no one ever says "Gee I wish I'd spent more time at the office"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On their deathbed no one ever says "Gee I wish I'd spent more time at the office"

 

Speak for yourself... I'm a workaholic! :-P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...