Anyone else think this was rude?

[Isabella Gia (Banned) 53881]

I am not sure how to explain the way I feel about this thread as I respect everyone's point of view but I can't understand how someone would respond to a potential client in such a rude way.

 

I mentioned in another thread once we (SP's) owe potential clients the same respect any other service provider owes to people interested in their service/product only that normally they are not as lucky as we are to get to decide if we want to see the person interested or not which is not how it usually works in any other business and when it does, one of the first things someone dealing with clients is taught is to always be respectful so yes, there is nothing wrong with choosing not to see a client but that can be done without being harsh or impolite.

 

As for the chat/pm exchanging well, I was surprised to find that most ladies do not want to chat 'just for conversation' I mean, I understand there is some members there who definitely do not know how to approach a lady but I have had the pleasure of being in very nice conversations with a few of the gentlemen there some of them I know I'll never meet as they are not in Ottawa but I still enjoy our chats and learn from them.

 

Anyway, I'm glad things were clarified between MH and the girl and I guess a piece of advice or lesson for all of us is not to answer PM or email if we are in a bad mood :)

[etasman2000 15994]

Communication is about context and pre-establish relationships. Without either any communication would have been considered unwelcomed.

 

Yes there is the hidden 'bad day' factor and anyone could choose to wait-a-day before replying.

 

Never in anger never in haste or the porridge goes to waste.

[PistolPete 61421]

Re: Hi!

I don't chat. Book me or don't.. but this is boring.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Meathead

Hey ****** how is your night going?

 

MH

 

 

.....................................................................--

this was a response I got from a girl whose name I blocked out to protect her identity. I am a shy person and often I try to chat with a girl before just booking. I understand some girls dont like or dont want to chat with us and just want our money, but don't you think that conveying this message in a response could have been done in a much better way? I was really shocked....and I apologized for "boring" her.

 

input welcome

 

MH

 

Additional Comments:

that's baloney. You can easily get to know what I'm like by viewing my posts and *********. How you get to know me is talk to me. Asking me an open ended question means you expect me to entertain you. Here's how this works... you do your research. You book the girl of your choice and then you get to know her better in person.

You call it rude.. I call it cutting out time wasters.

 

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Meathead

Wow!! that was kind of rude. I am sorry for "boring" you. I am a little shy to get the ball rolling and was merely trying to get to know what you were like.. to decide if/when to book with you.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by ****** ****

I don't chat. Book me or don't.. but this is boring.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Meathead

Hey ****** how is your night going?

 

MH

 

 

 

..................................................................-

 

 

ouch!!

MH

 

Well if I'm reading this correctly, MH simply asked a very nice question, and really got brushed off very quickly.

 

I think it is rude period.

 

I have been known to send pm's to ladies throughout the West coast and East coast of Canada and I never have had a lady give me a come back like that.

 

I enjoy the art of flirtation, when I say the art, I take my time and express what I need to say in my words, If I'm setting up an appointment or like to chat in a pm format I do so.I don't go into the chat room very much at all.

 

I do this quite frequent ;) through pm's and emails to do actual bookings.

 

If a lady does not respond through pm/email to myself within reason,I normally move on.

 

So I don't think that MH was a time waster,tire kicker maybe perhaps he was getting to the point was not allowed by the lady in question after her quick response.

 

My take on it.

[40ishsxaddict 203]

Communication is about context and pre-establish relationships. Without either any communication would have been considered unwelcomed.

 

Yes there is the hidden 'bad day' factor and anyone could choose to wait-a-day before replying.

 

Never in anger never in haste or the porridge goes to waste.

 

didnt expect to read a porridge reference.... but it cracked me up anyways!

[stevecurious 42059]

I have to agree, most ladies provide ample information for a prospective client. Chatting without booking is generally not something ladies do.

 

I am afraid I have to disagree as I have had and continue to have very rewarding non date related conversations with ladies of this board. Admittedly these conversations usually stem from friendships developed after meeting a lady in person but this is not always the case. Furthermore asking someone "how they are doing" does not warrant such a harsh response. This lady has lost a potential client, possibly a repeat client and I believe there is a thread here on Cerb about how business is down amongst ladies as of late. Makes one wonder...does it not?

[PistolPete 61421]

not to say its about money, but in the end our time is money and if you have a request or interest, tell us...we are quicker to reply to someone who we know is interested in us than someone who might not be interested in us at all...just the conversation

 

Just a quick question "How would you know if someone is interested,or might not be interested in us at all..just conversation"

 

If there is no conversation carried and the individual is told " I don't chat, book me or don't this is boring"

 

Mmmm I say she is not interested or interesting.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Just a reminder that in this case MH has freely admitted (kudos to him) that there is much more behind this story than he stated in the original post:

 

... This was not the first time I have contacted her before. ... I have talked to her through PM many times before. I have asked questions and about her availabilty and rates before and complimented her on her pics. I have even expressed interest in meeting her at some point in the future. I just realized this now...which is why i never mentioned it at the beginning. So really since we had been through all that before ...

 

So he had talked with her "many times" and never booked. "We had been through all that before ..." may also be what the lady was thinking. Her response "Book me or don't.. but this is boring" may not look quite so abrupt, or out-of-the-blue, in light of this revised information about "many" previous PMs.

 

So another lesson worth remembering is that there is a honeymoon period in getting to know a lady, and that the honeymoon may not necessarily last as long as we all might wish, despite our good intentions. Sometimes the clock strikes midnight when we aren't expecting it, turning us from "potential client" into "pumpkin" in the eyes of our lady.

[stevecurious 42059]

not to say its about money, but in the end our time is money and if you have a request or interest, tell us...we are quicker to reply to someone who we know is interested in us than someone who might not be interested in us at all...just the conversation

 

In the end you might say it boils down to money for us, the men, as well! I say this because to us money is time and I am not interested in parting with my money if who I am with is rude or uninterested in me. After all a lot of us like to break the ice and establish a dialogue before the details are discussed. Again, how many threads are there here on Cerb informing everyone on proper etiquette when contacting a lady using e mail or pm? I wonder which of these following two examples of pm's would be responded to first in a live test.

 

Example 1:

 

Hello,

 

My name is Steve, how are you? I have read your profile, website, etc. and I just have a quick question in reqards to your services. Please let me know as I am interested in meeting with you.

 

Thank you

 

Steve

 

or

 

Example 2:

 

Hey, do you have time Friday to see me? Oh do you do bbbj? Let me know because I wanna meet ya.

 

stevecurious

[Annessa 22743]

for me personally, the first would be answered before the 2nd would. however in both cases you have said more than one sentence and expressed the desire to see the lady. not just said "hi how are you?"

 

after speaking with the lady that this thread is about I will say that there is definitely more to the story than the OP has admitted and previous conversations had been already allowed when in turn he didnt end up booking after all. I dont know if this is saying too much, but I respect now knowing more to the story that this was not a random act of rudeness nor the way that this SP responds to initial messages.

 

we dont like to have our time wasted..end of story. if the OP had expressed that he was interested and finally had the funds to see her in his original message rather than trying to start off by chatting again I'm sure the outcome would have been much different. I would hope this a lesson learned on his behalf.

 

 

In the end you might say it boils down to money for us, the men, as well! I say this because to us money is time and I am not interested in parting with my money if who I am with is rude or uninterested in me. After all a lot of us like to break the ice and establish a dialogue before the details are discussed. Again, how many threads are there here on Cerb informing everyone on proper etiquette when contacting a lady using e mail or pm? I wonder which of these following two examples of pm's would be responded to first in a live test.

 

Example 1:

 

Hello,

 

My name is Steve, how are you? I have read your profile, website, etc. and I just have a quick question in reqards to your services. Please let me know as I am interested in meeting with you.

 

Thank you

 

Steve

 

or

 

Example 2:

 

Hey, do you have time Friday to see me? Oh do you do bbbj? Let me know because I wanna meet ya.

 

stevecurious

[Winnipegcub 21293]

I was surprised to find that most ladies do not want to chat 'just for conversation' I mean, I understand there is some members there who definitely do not know how to approach a lady but I have had the pleasure of being in very nice conversations with a few of the gentlemen there some of them I know I'll never meet as they are not in Ottawa but I still enjoy our chats and learn from them.

 

Isabella, nice to see a few ladies still value the 'court' in courtesan. Not to apply labels but I can assure you that many clients value this too!

[PistolPete 61421]

Regardless what was happening behind the scenes (longer pm's, "potential client to a pumpkin" what ever)

 

As far as I'm concerned there has to be diplomacy used, that is where clients value the opinion or statement made by the provider.

 

Even so, if client x tells potential clients a-z you don't think that if might affect her business?

 

This could of gone for 2 days, but end result is how to handle it correctly and courteous about it.

 

I don't tell newbies that pm myself and ask me for advise for ladies

 

"Sorry but I don't chat this is boring"

[777flyer 1612]

Wow......quite the thread....interesting,

 

We get SO caught up in who is right and who is wrong, we fail to really see the the big picture here.....and that is.....really who cares ???

 

Move on, in the grander scheme of things, this really is insignificant.......

 

Was the Ladies response rude ?.....

 

it APPEARS so, but without really knowing all the facts it is difficult to judge what caused the response and why she would offend the OP, who appears to have been polite with his approach.....

 

in any case, if that were the response I would receive, I would stop the correspondence, and not continue discussion with the lady, who at that point has lost my business.....and if that is her typical attitude, she is well on her way to driving herself OUT OF BUSINESS

 

Then, I would decide which one of the FANTASTIC ladies on CERB, I would choose to see, which would very quickly lead me to forget the rude encounter....

 

Why bother finding out what was wrong ? With so many wonderful ladies available, move on without any further thought......consider she did you a favour by further narrowing your selection .........

 

SNK

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

Flyer...very well put!

I love to chat via PM, text or email however not much of a phone person.

Let's just all take a step back for a moment tho. Just because I love this type of interaction does not mean that everyone does! My best friend can talk on the phone for hours if I let her yet HATES any form of electronic communication! Funny, but we still get along!

[BigPoppa 127]

Personally, I like to chat to get to know someone first but not all ladies are alike!

 

 

hmm...you seem to advertise yourself alot I've noticed.

[777flyer 1612]

Flyer...very well put!

I love to chat via PM, text or email however not much of a phone person.

Let's just all take a step back for a moment tho. Just because I love this type of interaction does not mean that everyone does! My best friend can talk on the phone for hours if I let her yet HATES any form of electronic communication! Funny, but we still get along!

 

Meg,

 

You're just so damn hot, who wouldn't get along with you ?

 

But.... I digress.........

 

SNK

[pipercub 795]

Well said Isabella. I for one love to chat with a lady prior to a visit. Dialogue gives me a gut feeling about the lady I intend to see. Frankly If I can't converse with the lady I want to see I don't bother.

[Guest **n****er]

Sorry, but most of us have to deal with the stressors of family life and multiple bosses, meetings etc everday just to get by. To be treated like a piece of crap because somebody was having a bad day is not excuse. This is a service industry like it or not. And if your going to treat a potential client like crap based on how YOUR day is going without considering his day....forget it.

 

Plenty of other fish/providers.

[777flyer 1612]

hmm...you seem to advertise yourself alot I've noticed.

 

Now THIS is rude....

 

Why would you say something like this ?

 

Read Meg's comment, within the context that it is meant, and then clearly your comment is unjustified and rude........

 

Some things never cease to amaze..........

[Ava Foxx 1747]

hmm...you seem to advertise yourself alot I've noticed.

 

What exactly is the point of this comment?

Meg is a fantastic lady and a very active participant here on CERB. She is simply contributing to the thread, not advertising herself.

[Reese 253]

Now THIS is rude....

 

Why would you say something like this ?

 

Read Meg's comment, within the context that it is meant, and then clearly your comment is unjustified and rude........

 

Some things never cease to amaze..........

 

Ditto!, on that 777flyer. Let's not start fanning the flames in another direction !

Why wouldn't she?? This is the place to announce/advertise, afterall.

Well within miss Meg's, or any other ladies' rights to do so.

Large part of this prickly, overdone "analysis" by all of us blind backbenchers.

 

Present, inviting, communicable, approachable, etc...

I'd say most of the boys appreciate that.

Says she's local, known, well reputed, communicates regularly with client/friends(on CERB) with or without intended rendezvous every time.

Just a pleasant exchange, or(as here) her posted opinion to the subject.

Makes her(appear) attainable? and open to contact.

Far better than, "Hmmm....there was this attractive lady who posted(whatever) once or twice maybe like a week or so ago...wonder if she's available?...should I call?...naw, maybe not."

 

...back to the overdone analysis...

Bottom line - 2 witnesses to the facts - period.

Everything else on the "community's" part here ranges from innocent speculation to near nasty embellishment and condemnation based upon unknown details of the exchange.

 

There's been an admission, I believe, on Meathead's part(kudos) that his chosen medium of communication(PM), and lack of immediate intended purpose of of the greeting, along with previous similarly delivered approaches, may have led to the abrupt shut down.

He'll tweek the pitch, all will be well....happy endings....water way, way under the bridge.

May very well also have caught the lady at a less than ideal time.

Doubt very much she'd last long or enjoy $ucce$$ if this were her daily attitude or welcoming.

 

Hell! If I get so much as a 1 second pause following that near robotic, scripted phone call greeting: "Hello, how are you today, sir..." on MY Saturday, I immediately GRRRROWL my dismissal..."NO, THANK YOU."

.CLICK!.......or, shit!...fumble with the cell... .beep.

I'd personnally be biting my phone in half within a week getting the calls the ladies' endure.

 

Alright! as said...happy endings.

Let's move along and get back to the cheerier shit.

Some us have to get back to our cherished jobs in a few hours....crap.

 

G' night!

[BigPoppa 127]

Now THIS is rude....

 

Why would you say something like this ?

 

Read Meg's comment, within the context that it is meant, and then clearly your comment is unjustified and rude........

 

Some things never cease to amaze..........

 

 

Simply stating based on observations...not meaning to be rude.

[Guest M**th**d]

That night was the night I was going to book with her if I could. I just didnt realize I was going to be thought of as a pest by asking a simple question. I realize with the lady in question I should have been more direct. Unfortunately i found out too late that that was how she preferred to communicate. If she had just come back with "My night is going great, but Sorry I dont like to chat, are you interested in booking with me tonight?" Things would have been completely different. Like I said earlier, I have learned a lot from this and will do my best to conduct my interactions in a much different way.

 

Just a reminder that in this case MH has freely admitted (kudos to him) that there is much more behind this story than he stated in the original post:

 

 

 

So he had talked with her "many times" and never booked. "We had been through all that before ..." may also be what the lady was thinking. Her response "Book me or don't.. but this is boring" may not look quite so abrupt, or out-of-the-blue, in light of this revised information about "many" previous PMs.

 

So another lesson worth remembering is that there is a honeymoon period in getting to know a lady, and that the honeymoon may not necessarily last as long as we all might wish, despite our good intentions. Sometimes the clock strikes midnight when we aren't expecting it, turning us from "potential client" into "pumpkin" in the eyes of our lady.

 

Additional Comments:

I disagree. This thread may not have mattered to you, but it did to me. I really have taken into consideration everything that has been said and I appreciate all of the feedback. Does it suck that now most of the girls on here will think I am a time waster and probably not want to give me a chance??? ofcourse!!! However, I have now learned how to be more direct, and tasteful at the same time. I have also learned from some of the responses that some of the girls I have wanted to meet... suddenly are not so interesting to me.

 

MH

 

Wow......quite the thread....interesting,

 

We get SO caught up in who is right and who is wrong, we fail to really see the the big picture here.....and that is.....really who cares ???

 

Move on, in the grander scheme of things, this really is insignificant.......

 

Was the Ladies response rude ?.....

 

it APPEARS so, but without really knowing all the facts it is difficult to judge what caused the response and why she would offend the OP, who appears to have been polite with his approach.....

 

in any case, if that were the response I would receive, I would stop the correspondence, and not continue discussion with the lady, who at that point has lost my business.....and if that is her typical attitude, she is well on her way to driving herself OUT OF BUSINESS

 

Then, I would decide which one of the FANTASTIC ladies on CERB, I would choose to see, which would very quickly lead me to forget the rude encounter....

 

Why bother finding out what was wrong ? With so many wonderful ladies available, move on without any further thought......consider she did you a favour by further narrowing your selection .........

 

SNK

 

Additional Comments:

Meg doesnt need to advertise herself anymore!!! Her pics, reviews and most importantly her personality speak for themselves.

 

Meg you are amazing!!!

 

hmm...you seem to advertise yourself alot I've noticed.

[Annessa 22743]

 

Additional Comments:

I disagree. This thread may not have mattered to you, but it did to me. I really have taken into consideration everything that has been said and I appreciate all of the feedback. Does it suck that now most of the girls on here will think I am a time waster and probably not want to give me a chance??? ofcourse!!! However, I have now learned how to be more direct, and tasteful at the same time. I have also learned from some of the responses that some of the girls I have wanted to meet... suddenly are not so interesting to me

 

see i find this not so much a sign of a learning experience on your part now. You are picking who you want to see now (or dont) by judging how people conduct themselves in opinion..based on what they have conveyed in type.....yet you dont think that someone else should get annoyed at you when they judge you by past conversations?

 

seems a little double standard-ish dont u think? just sayin.

 

sidenote: for the person who had the observations about meg advertising herself.......um..this is a recommendation board where the gals are allowed to advertise themselves however they choose, how ever often they choose etc. saying that anyone advertises themselves a lot on here is kind of like saying the sky is blue. :-)

[Guest s******ecan****]

Does it suck that now most of the girls on here will think I am a time waster and probably not want to give me a chance??? ofcourse!!! However, I have now learned how to be more direct, and tasteful at the same time. I have also learned from some of the responses that some of the girls I have wanted to meet... suddenly are not so interesting to me.

 

MH

 

 

 

This won't be a problem for you based on this thread. Few ladies would rule out a client based on your what you have said here. While some may have differing opinions on the subject you didn't flame anyone and you kept the lady's name out of it.

[Meg O'Ryan 266444]

sidenote: for the person who had the observations about meg advertising herself.......um..this is a recommendation board where the gals are allowed to advertise themselves however they choose, how ever often they choose etc. saying that anyone advertises themselves a lot on here is kind of like saying the sky is blue. :-)

 

Furthermore, when we do advertise our availability, it is done in the appropriate section. Taking the time to voice our opinions is not meant as advertising but as participation. I seriously doubt that I post any more than some other ladies and wonder why I was targeted in this manner. Oh well, everyone is allowed to voice their opinions and I guess I will just accept it.