10 Things NOT to Say to an Escort

[VedaSloan 119179]

1. You charge too much/are too expensive/I only have $40

 

-If you can't afford the rates, either save up or see someone else who is within your budget. But don't negotiate. It's tacky and insulting.

 

2. You're so smart, why are you doing this?

 

-*gasp* Escorts have brains? Who'd a thunk it. I'm doing this because I'm smart enough not to give it away for free.

 

3. Will you bend your rules/restrictions/boundaries for me?

 

-Our rules and restrictions are there for a reason. If I say no Greek, that is not your cue to ask me why. Because you don't really want to know why. Do you really want to hear, "because I just ate something that is giving me the shits"? I didn't think so.

 

4. What will you do when you're too old for this? Surely you have a back-up?

 

-Two words: MILF and GILF. That is all.

 

5. So what's your real name?

 

-Does it matter? I could tell you anything and you wouldn't know. Just enjoy the moment.

 

6. Are you clean?

 

-Are you? Common sense should tell you that I work with my body and therefore it is in my best interests to keep that body healthy. DUH.

 

7. I'm an amateur photographer and I think your pics are terrible/could use work/don't please my masculine sensibilities and here is how you can fix them/let me take new photos for you for trade.

 

-I don't care about your unsolicited opinion. If I wanted it, I would have asked for it.

 

8. I'm so hot, young and hung, you should be paying me!

 

-Looks mean nothing, respect means everything.

 

9. Did you cum/orgasm/finish?

 

-If you have to ask...

 

10. So and So does x, y, z/ So and So said x, y, z

 

-Gossip and indiscretion are not turn-ons. Talking to me about other escorts is tacky, and even worse is using them to try to coerce services that I don't offer. If so and so does it, go see her.

[ChloeSummers 8409]

I hope no one minds me adding a few more.

 

1) You're too beautiful to be doing this(smart was already addresses)

 

2) You know you're too good for this, right? It's so degrading.

 

3)If I could afford you I'd keep you at my house and pay for everything and you'd never have to work here again.

 

Come on, people. Be nice and respectful to your Sp.

Berlin nailed this post bang on. I hope people take it to heart.

[Guest s******ecan****]

Not a question but I've heard about this phenomenon from a few ladies over the years and it goes like this.....

 

 

The lady is out in public somewhere and encounters a client who can't seem to contain his surprise and lack of discretion as he calls out her name, or feels compelled to come over and say hello.

[Guest *Ste***cque**]

Cont'd:

11. Can you make change?

12. Are those real?

13. Would you have any immodium?

14. Do you mind if we synchronize watches?

 

I'm joking but after reading your list I'm not sure. :)

[VedaSloan 119179]

Cont'd:

11. Can you make change?

12. Are those real?

13. Would you have any immodium?

14. Do you mind if we synchronize watches?

 

I'm joking but after reading your list I'm not sure. :)

 

 

I've been asked the first two before. Do I look like a bank? Bring the exact amount or just above, but don't ask if I have change. I don't.

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Do you have childen?

 

Do you have a boyfriend? Do they know what you do?

 

An escort's personal life is no one's business unless they happen to tell the client in confidence.

 

And another thing, if anyone is a shrink and sees escorts, don't try and analyze them. I met someone like that recently and they asked a host of personal questions and I could see where it was going. He was asking the questions the exact same way a psychologist would. What he didn't realize is that he told me on our first visit that he was a mental health professional and probably didn't remember but I have a pretty good memory.

 

I flat out told him my personal life is not conducive to the environment that we were in and I didn't feel comfortable discussing those things. That is the bullshit that really makes me mad. You don't know me and whatever I tell someone could be bullshit anyways just to appease them if I really wanted to play a game but I don't do that sort of thing. Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies!

 

So go ahead and analyze away! lol. Perhaps they felt guilty and were trying to make themselves feel better by justifying why they were there. Their demeanor was sort of creepy in that way. Who knows and who cares. I am here to provide a service, not to tell my life story to someone I don't know and probably won't ever see again.

[Exotic Touch Danielle 31733]

Can we see each other on another level (can we date)

 

.....I am flattered but please let's keep this how it is thankyou

 

What are you rates (can you see me for this)

 

....I gave you my rates please either respect that or go see another lady you are able to afford

 

Do you offer 15 minutes

 

....To each their own but I feel 15 minutes is very tacky

 

I am young and hung

 

....um ok and what does that have to do with me? No seriously lol

 

Hey baby girl let's make money together

 

.....Hell NO thankyou keep it moving dude

[ReaganAdams 283]

LOL. So accurate, ladies! Some other questions and statements that get my goat:

 

"I want to book. Here is my phone number. Call me to schedule. Don't reply to this email."

......Uh. What?

 

"I have 80$. I will be a good client I'll come every day for 80$"

- this one kills me. So, you're expecting me to work for less than half my hourly rate, on a daily basis? Seems fair....

 

him: "Can I have x discount?"

me: "Sorry, but no."

him: "But I asked respectfully!"

- Asking that question, no matter how "politely," is inherently disrespectful.

 

"Oh, I didn't realize how YOUNG you are!"

 

"So, where are you from? Where did you grow up? No really, where did you grow up? Where did you go to high school? Where did you go to college? Where do you live now?"

[ChloeSummers 8409]

There has been a massive increase in requesting discounts lately, and I've found very few Sp's in several spaces that have not encountered it. We're not talking small, either. We're talking huge discounts.

 

Something to bare in mind is this: yes, it is a business. However, we are not selling stuff we buy at wholesale to peddle through our stores, nor just offering our skills to people.

 

We are selling our bodies, our emotions, and connections with people. We also put ourselves at great risk to do this. There are a vast amount of expenses that come with the job. We lose out on a lot, especially socially, when we do this job. We set our rates for a reason. Please respect that.

 

Little discounts here or there? If the SP is fine with than then sure. That's their business. Long term relationship? Sure, if the SP wants to do it. Multiple hour discounts? Sure, again, depending on the SP.

 

Please do not:

-Yell at, sweat at, or insult the SP for having no discount.

- Tell the SP his/her services are _________, so ___ him/her!

- Tell she Sp she/he is not _____ enough or ____ enough to deserve those rates.

- Tell the SP that so and so does this. Or so and so is ___ and __ and charges less, so you should too! Or, you are not as good as so and so.

- Tell the SP they are unkind for charging too high.

- Tell the SP they are not worth the money.

- Agree to said rate, and then try to haggle in person, or conveniently forget 40$ or more ( or any amount for that matter) at home or in the car.

- Bully the SP by telling them they will never get work, or enough work to survive if they keep charging what they are charging.

- Tell the Sp you are doing them a favour by spending money on them.

- Tell them they were ugly, or fat anyways.

 

Myself and others have encountered all of, or even more of these behaviours. Stop.

Yes, we have bills to pay like any other business owner. Yes, we should choose to model our business in ways that keep us competitive. Yes, all business owners have bills to pay, and make discounts too.

 

But again, we are selling ourselves. We put ourselves at risk and sacrifice a lot to be here to be with you. It does not mean we don't love our jobs. Myself and others do. But it's not an easy job. It's not a well liked, open job. We are part of a social underground.

 

Please respect who we are. Please respect what we do. Please respect what we risk and sacrifice to be with you.

 

If you want discounts, do it respectfully and reasonably. If the fee is too high, move on. If you don't want to move on, save up the money. It should be this simple. It shouldn't be this mean. We are human beings too.

[Ice4fun 78407]

There has been a massive increase in requesting discounts lately, and I've found very few Sp's in several spaces that have not encountered it. We're not talking small, either. We're talking huge discounts.

 

Something to bare in mind is this: yes, it is a business. However, we are not selling stuff we buy at wholesale to peddle through our stores, nor just offering our skills to people.

 

We are selling our bodies, our emotions, and connections with people. We also put ourselves at great risk to do this. There are a vast amount of expenses that come with the job. We lose out on a lot, especially socially, when we do this job. We set our rates for a reason. Please respect that.

 

Little discounts here or there? If the SP is fine with than then sure. That's their business. Long term relationship? Sure, if the SP wants to do it. Multiple hour discounts? Sure, again, depending on the SP.

 

Please do not:

-Yell at, sweat at, or insult the SP for having no discount.

- Tell the SP his/her services are _________, so ___ him/her!

- Tell she Sp she/he is not _____ enough or ____ enough to deserve those rates.

- Tell the SP that so and so does this. Or so and so is ___ and __ and charges less, so you should too! Or, you are not as good as so and so.

- Tell the SP they are unkind for charging too high.

- Tell the SP they are not worth the money.

- Agree to said rate, and then try to haggle in person, or conveniently forget 40$ or more ( or any amount for that matter) at home or in the car.

- Bully the SP by telling them they will never get work, or enough work to survive if they keep charging what they are charging.

- Tell the Sp you are doing them a favour by spending money on them.

- Tell them they were ugly, or fat anyways.

 

Myself and others have encountered all of, or even more of these behaviours. Stop.

Yes, we have bills to pay like any other business owner. Yes, we should choose to model our business in ways that keep us competitive. Yes, all business owners have bills to pay, and make discounts too.

 

But again, we are selling ourselves. We put ourselves at risk and sacrifice a lot to be here to be with you. It does not mean we don't love our jobs. Myself and others do. But it's not an easy job. It's not a well liked, open job. We are part of a social underground.

 

Please respect who we are. Please respect what we do. Please respect what we risk and sacrifice to be with you.

 

If you want discounts, do it respectfully and reasonably. If the fee is too high, move on. If you don't want to move on, save up the money. It should be this simple. It shouldn't be this mean. We are human beings too.

 

Very well said...

[Meaghan McLeod 179664]

Are you clean? Then when you ask them if they are, they reply, I've never been tested.......

[Amber Rose 19012]

"Does your family know you do this?"

 

"So what are your career goals? Y'know, since you can't really do this forever.."

 

"Are you seeing another guy after this?"

 

"Been working a lot today?"

 

"I'm on my mobile so I can't read your website, can you just tell me everything?" or "No I didn't read your ad, I just got the phone number and called"

 

"Why don't you offer x service? Have you ever tried it before or do you just not like it? I'm sure you'll like it if you try it!"

 

"I came to see you because you remind me/look like my wife/girlfriend/ex!"

 

"Can you describe what you look like?"

[mrgreen760 37785]

Sort of reads like another turn offs for SP's thread.

 

Peace

MG

[Liv Waters 52361]

Thank for posting this Berlin - so bang on.

 

I have one to add:

 

"Ill bet you deal with a lot of creeps" ... "have you had any bad things happen to you" [in your work]? "You must have some real doozies... I can't even imagine..."

 

I wish I could say these things are only said to me once in a while, but it happens constantly... and not even at a level of frequency where I could just weed out a few people to not see again... from first time clients, to ongoing and otherwise valued regular clients; it is ramped. This behaviour is incredibly patronizing and voyeuristic has more to do with clients attempting to soothe their own moral difficulties with seeing escorts... to raise their status as "good", "respectable", "well-meaning", when, in fact, this is experienced as demeaning and inappropriate to the nature of the professional context. Asking or inferring that an escort should detail experiences of abuse and violence creates a sense of violation in itself. We suck it up and are compelled to have to humour it all too often in order to keep the tone and flow of a date positive, but we experience it as a burden.

 

If you are sincere in caring about the safety and well-being of people in this industry, (barring taking to the streets to demand change, and we know why that is made difficult in this culture) do something meaningful: donate to your local sex workers rights organization, contribute to dialogue on the issues (on boards like this and elsewhere)... be the kind of client you know we need you to be; in all of your words and actions.

[StefanieBell 240]

One of my very first emails was someone trying to get a discount if he got me stoned, and the proceeded to ask me if I wanted to make extra money by selling coke and E for him and he could be my protection while I worked.

 

 

He didn't seem to even be phased when I told him I don't do drugs and have no need for his "side business" as I plan on keeping myself on the right side of the law.