Limerick challenge

[Carrie Moon 68826]

You best not hang out on a perch

if you don't want to meet up with lurch

use the best guys of cerb

turk, rosco and herb

for here you will not be besmurched

 

..........................

 

 

Book a girl on cerb and be filled with glee

Make sure you don't smell of pee

Be sure to have a shower

and bring some flower power

Or I will put you over my knee!

[Old Dog 179138]

Her mind is set to this task,

In her poetic glory, we bask,

But what I like best,

Carrie's double Moon chest,

If anyone bothers to ask.

[Carrie Moon 68826]

Her mind is set to this task,

In her poetic glory, we bask,

But what I like best,

Carrie's double Moon chest,

If anyone bothers to ask.

 

bwah ha ha!!! hey.. I know where my assets lie

[VedaSloan 119179]

This is potentially my favourite thread ever.

 

You guys are hilarious.

[40ishsxaddict 203]

Old dog is rockin it! gonna give er a shot .... mind you, this is after a coupla beers and a rye nd coke...( i work nights in case you notice the time of this post..lol) so here goes..

 

On Cerb, i;m payin the dollars

i'm not into Dog Collars

Just looking for a treat

And although i've got big feet

My penis ain't makin em holler

 

Additional Comments:

I'll try one more,

 

Just practisin my sex skills on Cerb

sometimes my life is a blur

while waiting for "The One"

i'm just havin fun

Thank God for the ladies on Cerb!

 

this is contagious... 1 more

 

There once was a cutie named Nicki

i'm told that she gave a great licky

her pictures were sweet

i vowed that we'd meet

as long as she didnt give me a hickey

 

happy bday Nicki

[Alpha Male 177]

O.k. here's my lame attempt.....

 

There was a young farmer named Jules

While on Cerb would not follow the rules

Found himself now "dis-Membered"

Favorite girls not remembered

He now contemplates f**king the mules

 

Oh well....I tried

[Rounding Third 9568]

To come up with limerick is so daunting.

But to impress CERB ladies I am wanting.

Cause you ladies should know that the most,

You can always find here on the East Coast

And we men all have something worth flaunting.

 

Now This Labour Day weekend we are in a fuss,

As ?Earl? the hurricane will be upon us.

And an SP half-listening in Toronto,

Decided to come here quite pronto,

As she heard this Earl is "enormous"!

 

So from Toronto she flew here in a jiffy,

Seeking Earl, and a screwing so nifty!

But alas, all she felt was shallow,

On hearing Earl is not a real fellow,

So she said, ?Ok, since I am here I?ll boink Lefty!?

[M*s*** 162]

Ahhhhhhh! I learned something new today. I had no idea that was called the "italian" ...

Posted via Mobile Device

[Carrie Moon 68826]

Ahhhhhhh! I learned something new today. I had no idea that was called the "italian" ...

Posted via Mobile Device

 

 

lol..wrong thread my dear:boobies:

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Ahhhhhhh! I learned something new today. I had no idea that was called the "italian" ...

 

He admired the Way of the Greeks,

But she mostly liked other techniques:

"Let's do it Italian!"

And so her Cerb stallion

Squirted olive oil over her cheeks!

[Old Dog 179138]

He admired the Way of the Greeks,

But she mostly liked other techniques:

"Let's do it Italian!"

And so her Cerb stallion

Squirted olive oil over her cheeks!

 

 

Kudos WiT!!!!

 

A chivalrous save for a damsel in distress!!!!

[Guest s******ecan****]

lol..wrong thread my dear:boobies:

 

 

Damn WIT you beat me to it.

 

 

There was a CERBITE known as the "Scallion"

Who wanted to try it "Italian"

He propositioned one that was near

and quite deaf in one ear

she said "..err 'ow many men in a battalion?"

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

Damn WIT you beat me to it ...

 

... even us old guys can be quite spry ... right after our afternoon nap, that is ...

 

more italiano:

 

Asked a thin Cerb gent who was teeny,

As he rubbed her buns with his weenie:

How's it feel? Pray relate!"

Sighed his Italian date:

"It's just like al dente linguini!"

[Old Dog 179138]

His CERB list was done and complete,

His status with women, elite,

He'd seen all that he wanted,

But that left him undaunted,

He renamed himself "Pistol Re-Pete."

[PistolPete 61421]

His CERB list was done and complete,

His status with women, elite,

He'd seen all that he wanted,

But that left him undaunted,

He renamed himself "Pistol Re-Pete."

 

 

LMAO you sir are very clever and very funny,I enjoy reading your comments and posts, always a pleasure Old Dog!:mrgreen:

[Old Dog 179138]

When the women of CERB start to tire,

And they've nothing to sate their desire,

We've got something for them,

Called Fat Bastard BBM,

We're horny big old guys, for hire.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

His limp sex-life was going downhill

Til he popped an enhancer blue pill.

The lady of his dreams

Gasped "My! My! -- It now seems

It's beginning to show me goodwill!"

[Old Dog 179138]

As I think of today, my eyes tear,

For the end of the summer is near,

Oh the things of my whimsy,

Are tops thin and flimsy,

On the girls who have shed their brassiere.

 

With autumn, comes heavier wear,

With nary an inch of flesh bare,

But I must confess,

My eyes needed the rest,

From three months of continuous stare.

 

So, what's a poor guy to do,

When the chill winds of autumn blow through?

Why the answer is clear,

You should know it, you're here,

And you should have thought of it, too.

 

Oh the options we have are so many,

Be it Karen or Maggie or Jenny,

For CERB does provide,

A selection so wide,

The value is worth every penny.

 

So now, you had better remember,

When you're warm in a bed in December,

With a wonderful feeling,

As you stare at the ceiling,

Thank god I read this in September.

[Guest f***2f***]

Damn it these are getting in my head...ok here goes...

 

When searching on CERB it's a must,

To discover a lady with lust.

Don't settle for sweet,

Or even petite.

Heed Boner, these words you can trust!

:bddog:

[Old Dog 179138]

Oh CERB was a fantastic find,

It constantly boggles the mind,

But the value it lends,

Are the wonderful friends,

That I've made in the time since I signed.

[Guest W***ledi*Time]

"Hidden gems", they call lady-newbies,

Be they opals, sapphires, or rubies.

Their polished Cerb assets

With brilliant-cut facets

Shine lustrous like pearl-necklaced boobies!

[Cato 160314]

The poetic talents on this board never cease to amaze!!!

[Guest s******ecan****]

The poetic talents on this board never cease to amaze!!!

 

Likewise.......when I started this thread I thought it might generate half a dozen replies. You guys/gals are awesome!

[Old Dog 179138]

Old Angus was a man quite well built,

He was a wonder to see in his kilt,

But Beth never thought,

That this magnificent Scot,

Had a swordlength including the hilt.

 

She frightenedly gasped,"I'm too wee!!!

Your willy's too long, three foot three!!!"

But Angus just smiled,

And said, "No, my wee child,

That's to scare off the English, you see."

 

Then Angus removed this disguise,

And revealed to Beth's waiting eyes,

The source of his pride,

That was nearly as wide,

As one of Beth's creamy white thighs!!!!

 

The sight of which, caused Beth a fright,

"You'll no get that in me tonight!"

And again Angus smiled,

And said, "No, my wee child,

It's no what you think at first sight."

 

Now Beth was beginning to think,

That Angus had a really wee dink,

But she was soon to discover,

That her new Gaelic lover,

Had an ideal sized phallus, all pink.

 

Then she wondered just what she had seen,

And came to conclusion, obscene,

She said, OH MY GOD!!!

'Twas a lamb on your rod!!!!!"

And her ivory skin turned pale green.

 

But Angus could see this upset,

And said to the lass, "Don't you fret!

What you saw 'neath my kit,

Was a wrap, freshly knit,

Cuz the weather up here's cold and wet."

 

And he quickly allayed all her fears,

Then he looked at her face, wet with tears,

And Beth said, " I'm an ass,

Please forgive this wee lass?"

And he said that he would, raising cheers.

 

When nothing was left to be said,

They forsook his tiny sized bed,

And ran nude together,

For a romp in the heather,

In a glen near his family homestead.

 

Well, they romped and they played for an hour,

And Angus did quickly lose power,

Though he came more than thrice,

The thought of this vice,

Had turned his mood really quite sour.

 

So back to his home they did walk,

With nary a word said, no talk.

Until Beth did state,

"For an hour, my rate,

Is 400 for touching your cock."

 

Old Angus paid Beth her due,

And then sadly, he bid her adieu.

But the tears in his eyes,

Were not for thoughts of her sighs,

But for the money he'd spent from his shoe.

 

Oh Old Angus will not say a peep,

But his secret we should never keep,

When you make a CERB plan,

Just be a CERB man,

Don't prepare by fucking a sheep!!!!!

[Carrie Moon 68826]

My god man.. you are a genius! or at least you're regularly plugged into one :bddog: