I hope none of us will go through this

[Loralee Reach 245]

I have a girlfriend who I know for ages and she is a super person. Her daughters are trying to claim that she is not able to make decisions or carry her own life as she has until now. Let me tell you she is only 60 years old and good looking, manages her business with no problems and makes right choices.

Daughters are in their late 30's and want her to give them a power of attorney to decide on her behalf.

My friend went to the doctor, got several tests and she is absolutely alright. I called the police "victims of abuse squad" and they told me she should make a lawyer aware of this situation.

The daughters went to her house (they had a key) and decided to renovate some things and without my friends' permission, removed items such as dresers and area rugs and kitchen stuff.

You may be thinking that my dear girlfriend had a mess of a house, right?

No, she did not and because I am very protective of the ones I love , I am askinger my Cerb community to give me ideas of how to help her....

I give you thanks in advance for this one!!!

LoraLee

Your sexy GFE!!!:confused:

[Guest s******ecan****]

This is serious business, a dear friend of mine went through a similar situation. 2 years ago her step-daughters literally kidnapped her spouse out of his nursing home (he has mild dementia or early Alzhiemers), took him to a new one and had POA's drawn up. Next thing you know all his pensions RRIF's and investments were out of her control. One of the daughters was a lawyer, the other a friggin Doctor. They then tried to get a hold of her property (her residence long before she married this man).

 

Eventually she was able to have the POA declared null and "custody" of her husband returned. She is aout about $180,000 in lawyers fees, lost income, and still missing investments. She is suing them for elder abuse but it could take years.

 

I could share 3 or 4 other similar stories. What they are trying to do is considered "elder abuse" and she needs Independent Legal Advice ASAP. She should look for a family lawyer who specializes in this type of issue (becoming much more frequent).

[Loralee Reach 245]

Thanks for your input Scott

I will call this person Susan, not her real name.

Susan has quite a bit of money invested and a couple of rentals.

The daughters are trying to get control on those things.

She went to an attorney and was told that it is a family business.

I got one Cerbite recommending me a lawyer (Charles Wagner, who especializes in elderly abuse)

I phoned the man and he told me that she needs a power of attorney with one of her sisters and a restraining order to keep the daughters away)

Of course Susan loves her daughters and never saw this one coming.....

The lawyer said that there is only one solution to this kind of abuse, and it is to plan ahead of time what and where you would like....wills and powers of attorney and investments with irrevocable beneficiaries and all that....

Thanks again Scott

LoraLee

[roamingguy 300292]

Definitely get a lawyer to protect your friends interests.

And call the police to have the children charged with theft for taking stuff out of your friends home.

Right now my mother is going through some issues, I could never imagine doing something like those kids are doing...that sort of thing pisses me off

RG

[Boomer 33202]

Kudos for standing up for your friend.

 

It has already been said, talk to a lawyer and he should be able to advise her of her rights and a few strategies for coping. A simple lawyers letter to the daughters would no doubt put them on notice.

 

She also probably need to develop a support network. I am sure there are valuable resources through social services and a number of non profits who specalize in assisting the women and the elderly. As I used the term network, that might also refer to others that she might meet through these NGOs, who have similar experiences and can be trusted to look out for each other. I'm up there now myself and I hesitated to use the term elderly, as it now seems to be the new middle age. I still consider myself pretty frisky.

[theliquor (Lost but not fo 50595]

I have a girlfriend who I know for ages and she is a super person. Her daughters are trying to claim that she is not able to make decisions or carry her own life as she has until now. Let me tell you she is only 60 years old and good looking, manages her business with no problems and makes right choices.

Daughters are in their late 30's and want her to give them a power of attorney to decide on her behalf.

My friend went to the doctor, got several tests and she is absolutely alright. I called the police "victims of abuse squad" and they told me she should make a lawyer aware of this situation.

The daughters went to her house (they had a key) and decided to renovate some things and without my friends' permission, removed items such as dresers and area rugs and kitchen stuff.

You may be thinking that my dear girlfriend had a mess of a house, right?

No, she did not and because I am very protective of the ones I love , I am askinger my Cerb community to give me ideas of how to help her....

I give you thanks in advance for this one!!!

LoraLee

Your sexy GFE!!!:confused:

Morning!

As some of you know, I have given a number of lectures to the Chiefs of Police from all over Canada about this subject.

This type of abuse is clearly against the law, however members of the Crown will "dance" if they can, they HATE trying to prosecute abuse cases, whether it be physical, mental or financial. To them it takes up time, there is always issues with personalities, and the Crown considers it "messy". When my Mother was abusing my Dad who had full blown Alz., even with notarized copies of problems, police and hospital reports, the Crown was not willing to take a 80 year old to court, even after he died in her "care", saying "what am I supposed to do with her?"

That's why I got so heavily involved in Elder Abuse issues across Canada.

She needs to do the following, and quickly:

1. go to the police, make a formal statement and complaint so it is recorded

2. if the daughters continue to harass her, she needs to get a restraining order from a Justice of the Peace

3. go to her lawyer and change / modify her will. Does not have to take them out if she wishes, but she can put limitations on disbursements if they continue to harass her.

4. provide appropriate copies of the above to her personal doctor, her lawyer and importantly, her bank manager

5. With her lawyer, she can outline what qualifies her as being mentally and/or physically unable to protect herself and to ensure she is not a danger to others

again she can provide appropriate copies to those identified above

 

Hope this helps. Send me a pm for more info if you wish.

 

Additional Comments:

Sorry being long-winded on this.

One other key point. The cops are on the side of the abused, 100%. So are the Justice of the Peace who can issue supporting documents.

It is the Crown who pisses around.

Give the police a well structured view of the history, problems, doctor's reports of physical damages, bank statements that show unauthorized withdrawals or transfers, and they will react.

[Mc Lovin 797]

liquor is giving what is most likely the best route to take - lawyers are sometimes a necessary evil type of thing. I know I've help put a few lawyers kids through school ...

A less practical and less .... sane thing to do is liquidate everything, put the funds in a fire box stashed somewhere and tell the kids to suck it. not a recommended route but likely what I'd do ...

[roamingguy 300292]

Just occured to me, but your friend should get the locks changed on her doors so her kids can't enter her home and steal her stuff.

RG

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

You often hear about elder abuse in nursing homes or those who financially prey upon the elderly often by the way of ponzi schemes but for a woman's children to do this to their own mother? This has reached a whole new level of cruelty and greed.

[Guest s******ecan****]

This type of abuse is clearly against the law, however members of the Crown will "dance" if they can, they HATE trying to prosecute abuse cases, whether it be physical, mental or financial. To them it takes up time, there is always issues with personalities, and the Crown considers it "messy"..

 

 

This is so true. In the case of my friend that I wrote about earlier she called the police and they declined to get involved even though her husband had obviously been kidnapped. She didn't know enough to push them harder to make them do their jobs and more or less accepted their pathetic excuse that "this is a family issue".

 

Remember it took years for police to take spousal abuse seriously.

 

My mom died younger than we all expected which was tragic except for one thing. My oldest sister who has pissed away every penny she ever earned or borrowed was on the verge of moving in with my retired mother. I knew she was going to abuse her physically, emotionally, and financially. Yet my mom seemed unwilling to turn her away. I lost a lot of sleep wondering what would happen and how I would deal with it. Luckily for me and my mom we never had to go through with it.