pillowchats 203 Report post Posted November 16, 2015 I am wondering what measures you ladies take to keep yourself safe when going on an out call? I am contemplating doing out calls but I am worried about my safety. Do you get to know that person first, do you inform someone of your whereabouts, are they some products out there that I should purchase to protect myself, and how do you handle an aggressive or rude client? Thank you in advance for your input. Pillowchats 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 IMO, I would advise against going to a client's home. I do not do outcalls to homes with the exception of 2 regulars and they are both disabled. Unless you can verify that they have a landline and listed with 411, anyone can book a fake appointment and give a false address. You just don't know what you're walking into. With regards to outcalls at hotels, ask for their first and last name and be sure that they are in their room to answer the call. Go to upscale major hotels only and no sketchy or seedy motels. If they give you the name, verify it with the front desk and ask to have your call put through to their room. If they refuse to give their registered name, I'd advise against going. Again, could be a fake booking and if your safety is compromised, you don't have anything to fall back on. The biggest weapon you can use is your intuition. Listen to it. Ask to speak to them on the phone and chat for a few minutes. Anything used to protect yourself can be used against you and in most cases illegal. If you decide to go to a hotel, have someone to call and give them the name and info beforehand. Call when you're in the room, and have a secret way between you and a trusted friend if something is wrong and then you have a way out. I have done this a couple of times when I didn't feel right. I will also not engage in alcohol with a client because you could be slipped something in your drink. I just say "no thanks" and that I do not drink for personal reasons. Some people will try to push for this but stand your ground.. If I did drink with clients, I wouldn't drink it unless I saw them open it and peel the wrapper off with the cap or take off the corkscrew. Even then if your drink is left unattended or you turned your back. I won't trust anyone in these situations. When you're done, call when you're leaving while still in the room and when you have left the building. I always tell the client while in the room at the beginning of my boundaries. Also I tell them my restrictions on the phone. I make it very clear and if they are looking for something I don't offer, they need to find someone else to meet. If they persist in asking in person, I warn them that it won't work out and I will be leaving and that someone is downstairs to get me who knows where I am. Anyone intoxicated upon arrival, make up a story and leave. You do not want a confrontation with a drunk person who will most likely insist that it's okay and that they are safe. Not likely when someone has consumed too much and you can't predict their behavior. Some guys sound okay on the phone an hour or two before but if they've hit up the hotel lounge downstairs for drinks, it could be an entirely different story once you get there. Always be on alert for that. Don't do anything if you don't feel right about the person. There will always be another client waiting in the wings. Safety is paramount while money is secondary in these situations. I no longer do outcalls except for those 2 regulars who I trust. 10 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waterat 20911 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 Excellent advice from Nicolette and it may also be a good idea to pose this question in the SP only area. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 Excellent advice from Nicolette and it may also be a good idea to pose this question in the SP only area. Thanks Waterrat. However some new ladies do not have access yet so if I try to help any way I can if the question is posted here. 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest st*****ens**ors Report post Posted November 17, 2015 Please don't ever put yourself at risk if you have any misgivings. Even if you have none, be careful, have an exit plan, and a one touch emergency app ready on your phone (there are several on the market now) And I hope that none of it should ever be necessary. Wishing you well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Desiree Delights 2210 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 I've always done outcalls and you at least have the option of not seeing the client ever again if he acts up.....and he does not know where you live. clients show up for incalls drunk or high ALL the time so just doing incalls does not avoid that. customers can "act up" or be violent ANYWHERE. there is no avoiding that it is part of this occupation. the craigslist serial killer in the U.S. was murdering sp's working out of hotel rooms and recemtly a Canadian sp was shot out east in a decent hotel. violence can happen anywhere. do what you are comfortable doing. everyone has different comfort levels - some prefer providing incalls while others prefer outcalls. everyone is different. 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grass_Hopper 18263 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 Is not revealing my secrets. I would never want to be cut off guards again. Let's just say this. As discreete as I can be on an outcall, I always have someone, somewhere, waiting for me, back home, worrying for me. Bottom line, let's just say that I stay in fine shape, and I run fast. I scream like no one (in a very shap tone), and I always wear flat shoes. Also, I don't mind running naked in the snow to save my life. I have other ways to stay safe (thanks in part to LYLA), but those... Will remain secrets... ;) 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolette Vaughn 294340 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 Is not revealing my secrets. I would never want to be cut off guards again. Let's just say this. As discreete as I can be on an outcall, I always have someone, somewhere, waiting for me, back home, worrying for me. Bottom line, let's just say that I stay in fine shape, and I run fast. I scream like no one (in a very shap tone), and I always wear flat shoes. Also, I don't mind running naked in the snow to save my life. I have other ways to stay safe (thanks in part to LYLA), but those... Will remain secrets... ;) I don't mind mentioning them because I no longer do outcalls and if I can help someone else stay safe...I have no problems with that. 1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest st*****ens**ors Report post Posted November 17, 2015 It's really troubling to me that these are concerns you have to think of, much less plan for. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grass_Hopper 18263 Report post Posted November 17, 2015 It's really troubling to me that these are concerns you have to think of, much less plan for. Well, for every buisness, there is a plan. This is no different. Sometimes, s**t hits the fan for others, or for us, and we learn (hopefully...). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest st*****ens**ors Report post Posted November 17, 2015 i understand the reality. It's the gap between how it is and how it should be that feels wrong. No one should have to feel unsafe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fortunateone 156618 Report post Posted November 18, 2015 Nicolette's advice is very complete. the safety call & someone knowing where you are is always one of the most important things. Letting the client know or see you making the call is not a bad idea at all. Before you leave home: use google. Google the phone number, and also the address you are given. Do not go until you have verified that they are using a working phone number. You call them back, give them your ETA. obviously if the number doesn't work you aren't wasting your time. When you google the address you are given, it is not just to figure out where you are going, it is to verify the address exists. And what is actually at the address. You might find out the address doesn't exist, or you might find out that it is incomplete. If the address given leads to an apartment building and you don't have the unit number for example, you don't go until you get it. you need to google the whole thing. 6 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Regent 35404 Report post Posted November 20, 2015 You might find this guide helpful: http://tradesecretsguide.blogspot.ca/ 4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
andrelorelei 100 Report post Posted March 29, 2016 Does anyone use security guards? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Prufrock Cummings Report post Posted March 30, 2016 IMO, I would advise against going to a client's home. I do not do outcalls to homes with the exception of 2 regulars and they are both disabled. Unless you can verify that they have a landline and listed with 411, anyone can book a fake appointment and give a false address. You just don't know what you're walking into. With regards to outcalls at hotels, ask for their first and last name and be sure that they are in their room to answer the call. Go to upscale major hotels only and no sketchy or seedy motels. If they give you the name, verify it with the front desk and ask to have your call put through to their room. If they refuse to give their registered name, I'd advise against going. Again, could be a fake booking and if your safety is compromised, you don't have anything to fall back on. The biggest weapon you can use is your intuition. Listen to it. Ask to speak to them on the phone and chat for a few minutes. Anything used to protect yourself can be used against you and in most cases illegal. If you decide to go to a hotel, have someone to call and give them the name and info beforehand. Call when you're in the room, and have a secret way between you and a trusted friend if something is wrong and then you have a way out. I have done this a couple of times when I didn't feel right. I will also not engage in alcohol with a client because you could be slipped something in your drink. I just say "no thanks" and that I do not drink for personal reasons. Some people will try to push for this but stand your ground.. If I did drink with clients, I wouldn't drink it unless I saw them open it and peel the wrapper off with the cap or take off the corkscrew. Even then if your drink is left unattended or you turned your back. I won't trust anyone in these situations. When you're done, call when you're leaving while still in the room and when you have left the building. I always tell the client while in the room at the beginning of my boundaries. Also I tell them my restrictions on the phone. I make it very clear and if they are looking for something I don't offer, they need to find someone else to meet. If they persist in asking in person, I warn them that it won't work out and I will be leaving and that someone is downstairs to get me who knows where I am. Anyone intoxicated upon arrival, make up a story and leave. You do not want a confrontation with a drunk person who will most likely insist that it's okay and that they are safe. Not likely when someone has consumed too much and you can't predict their behavior. Some guys sound okay on the phone an hour or two before but if they've hit up the hotel lounge downstairs for drinks, it could be an entirely different story once you get there. Always be on alert for that. Don't do anything if you don't feel right about the person. There will always be another client waiting in the wings. Safety is paramount while money is secondary in these situations. I no longer do outcalls except for those 2 regulars who I trust. Great post Nicolette, and very eye-opening to be sure! Safety is paramount in any occupation, and being in an occupation that puts me at risk, I know that the most important thing it is to primarily have your wits, your eyes and spidey-sense going at all times. Trust that inner voice at all times and never doubt it for one second! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meaghan McLeod 179664 Report post Posted March 30, 2016 Another thing I always ask if I am going to an outcall is "are we going to be alone?" I can't tell you the number of times I've heard the reply as "oh, my buddies in the next room, but he won't bother us". Pass on that. If when you arrive, something feels off - don't go in or leave right away. Your safety is much more important then any amount of money. As far as security guards - I always have someone who knows exactly where I am going, how long I am going for and I am in contact with them. When it comes right down to it - I am in control. A security guard will not help if they can't get to you. However, I've had some great mentors over the years, so I know what I am doing. It might be a good idea to find a mentor to help you, as there are many things that they can help you learn. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bully 383 Report post Posted April 18, 2016 I wanted to reply and convey the same sentiments as stillopens, it is disconcerting and to be forthcoming..maddening about some of the thoughts that HAVE to run through the Ladies minds for their own safety and well being. Just saying. Stay safe Ladies...and thanks. 2 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites