Complete Lack of Subtlety?

[Guest M***s]

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[Meaghan McLeod 179664]

I am interested in knowing (without naming names), if she is the same person you originally cancelled, and then re-booked?

 

I wish that you felt more comfortable. I understand you are new and learning, however, I also suspect you are like the cat on a hot tin roof. Easily spooked. With the laws the way they are, I totally understand.

 

However, if someone comes in, guns a blazing, showing a total lack of discretion, I would also be leery. One of the reason I don't wear my incall outfits to an outcall. I look like a normal sexy woman when going to see someone. At my place, it is different, as I am in control and can wear what I want. My communication is always discreet.

 

I just wish others did the same thing - it would make everyone's life easier. Especially guys asking for details. This is always where the plan falls apart.

 

xo

[Midnite-Energies 110563]

First I think a misconception needs to be cleared up. From your post, this person was on LYLA. Not everyone on LYLA is either a reputable provider or Gent BUT it is a good place for research, communication and getting to know those who participate. Those ladies who are serious about what they do and spend time and effort to build their profile and establish themselves do work within a code of etiquette. This does not mean everyone does or that there is an industry standard (at this point). Plus there are many transient providers who get in and/or out quickly with no real knowledge. This is where research is important and also risk assessment.

 

In this case, not only did you have someone misrepresenting themself you also had someone not open to good etiquette about it. It is up to you whether you post a name or not but this is not just a case of a bad time due to no connection.

 

I'm sorry this happened to you.

 

Sent from my SM-N900W8 using Tapatalk

[Guest S****r]

I'm a little confused by your description. Sounds like she actually did arrive for the appointment and that was when she let you know what was and wasn't allowed. Is that correct? Certainly once she is in the privacy of your hotel room she should be able to be frank about what her limits are. Communication is key to a good encounter. If you are able to engage in private acts in privacy, do you think you are not allowed to talk about them? It seems a a very odd expectation to me.

 

But perhaps I have misunderstood the situation.

 

If the conversation took place before the date, I could understand your concern. But once she has arrived?

 

Additional Comments:

I'm a little confused by your description. Sounds like she actually did arrive for the appointment and that was when she let you know what was and wasn't allowed. Is that correct? Certainly once she is in the privacy of your hotel room she should be able to be frank about what her limits are. Communication is key to a good encounter. If you are able to engage in private acts in privacy, do you think you are not allowed to talk about them? It seems a a very odd expectation to me.

 

But perhaps I have misunderstood the situation.

 

If the conversation took place before the date, I could understand your concern. But once she has arrived?

[JessyCeleste 14078]

Yeah, Im going to echo what many of the other ladies have already said. I look completely different heading to an outcall than I do when you come to me. I just look like Im visiting a friend. The heels and sexy attire is in my bag for only you to see.

On sort of a side note, I've never really liked the term 'donation'. I don't collect donations, I collect a fee for my time, like any other professional entertainer would. A donation is not only negotiable, its voluntary... I choose to donate to the SPCA but if I fail to, I haven't violated anyone... This is not the case at all with an SP and I feel the word can lead to a sense of entitlement to mess with it. I know its the word commonly used by the majority but I've never understood why. At least 'contribution' would be better and wouldn't devalue me or what I do nor create a sense that its optional. I prefer fee or rate.Once its clear that the money isn't for a specific service but for my time, we are good, so I don't see why we should minimize the value, solidity and status of our rates. This isn't directed at you as I of course realize you are using established lingo.

However, as you said, the money is for our time. If I didn't spend time with you and it is because you cancelled, yes I will expect to keep it as I do not misrepresent myself and have many who have vouched for me. However, even then, I wouldn't just leave. If the gent wasn't being alarming in anyway I would discuss this with him and explain my stance so that we could reach an agreement. I would NEVER just run off unless I felt threatened.

If I had to cancel once I got there and it isn't because anything is wrong or has been misrepresented, (IE I got an emergency call while on the way) I wouldn't expect a cent as this isn't the gents fault. He's already been inconvenienced, I can't fathom why he should pay. If anything Id apologize for wasting his time and offer a discount should he wish to give me a second chance.

Now if I did misrepresent myself IE photoshopped my pix and claimed to be 18 or a spinner or whatever is clearly BS once Im seen, Id know my guilt when the gent calls me on it and I couldn't bring myself to even ask for travel fee let alone run off with the full payment. But it goes with the personality type right? Someone who lies in their ads isn't an honest or caring person, so they are the type to feel entitled to running off. The issue is, how to know the honest SPs from the dishonest.

I would recommend only seeing reputable SPs while you are new and only give the new SPs a try once you have a little more experience and knowledge of what red flags to watch for. Just as their are predatory 'hobbyists' out there who lie in wait for brand new SPs they can take advantage of, sadly there are also predatory SPs (or those claiming to be SPs) lying in wait for new and vulnerable hobbyists to take advantage of.

I wouldn't say to only ever see established ones because how would new comers ever gain a rep unless they are given a chance... but while you are new, let the vets review them before you see them.. same for SPs, at first, only see reputable hobbyists until you know the ropes and have a knowledge of the dark side &its scams.

I'm very sorry that this happened. While this is a recommendation board, there IS indeed a section for dangerous encounters, bait and switch and I believe lacking discretion is an included aspect in that section. This sounds like all 3. There are also other websites and forums you can go to to warn others. It isn't bad-mouthing, its simply telling others of your experience so that they don't have the same befall them. Its up to you if you would like to share but I do encourage you to. The more its reported, the less that person can get away with it.

Im basing my assessment on what you said. I've only heard one side of course and Im not hear to judge what really happened. But this sort of thing does happen so Im basing it on what was said.

A lack of discretion is not appreciated on either side. Everything in this industry is about mutual respect and reciprocation. Having a girl in crazy spiked heels & a stripper-outfit climbing the steps to your home for neighbours to see is no way less exasperating and potentially damaging than it is to have a gent walk through the hallway with a bank envelope in his hand shouting Hi Jessy! (which is not the name those in the hallways know me by) nice to MEET you!" *facepalm*. We both need to consider not only our own discretion, but the discretion of the other. Everything needs to be reciprocal.

This is another way C-36 has endangered people. Many scamsters now feel they can get away with it having a 'go ahead, call the cops' attitude which..they have a point! How can a gent report a theft or even an attack without also incriminating himself?

Again, I'm sorry that this happened and it is CERTAINLY not the norm/common practice. Hope next time goes better for you, and if you pick someone reputable until you've learned the ropes, it will be a world of difference.

xo

[Guest M***s]

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[JessyCeleste 14078]

Hello folks,

 

It is the direct association of the "fee" with the specific activities she is looking to provide that was worrying.

 

Yeah that's highly disconcerting!!! A threat too? Nice! *rolls eyes* I'm so sorry that happened to you. You did the right thing notifying mod. The vast majority of threats are idle but I don't blame you for heeding it. What a horrible excuse for a human!

[Guest M***s]

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[drlove 37204]

Was this a lady from Lyla, or Backpage?

[Guest M***s]

All of you who have contributed to this thread have been very helpful and I thank you for your understanding and advice.

 

Apparently, warning others was wrong, I'm not entirely sure why it was wrong because that was never explained to me. I suspect I will no longer be posting here very often, my contributions to the community so far have been thrown back at me consistently and I've grown tired of it.

 

I pity the sap that visits with the girl I have described here, but it is no longer my responsibility to deal with the problem. I asked for help, didn't receive it in a timely manner, and had that thrown back at me when I attempted to warn others, seemingly well within the rules. That makes it clear to me that the responsibility for this now lies with those who would prefer to silence me rather than offering advice.

 

Best Regards,

 

MK

[Phaedrus 209521]

Apparently, warning others was wrong, I'm not entirely sure why it was wrong because that was never explained to me. I suspect I will no longer be posting here very often, my contributions to the community so far have been thrown back at me consistently and I've grown tired of it.

 

There are good reasons why negative posts aren't permitted here. You'd be amazed by how many turn out to be written by a client who had a bad experience because he was an asshole, or who thinks making someone else looks bad somehow makes him look good, or even by another provider posing as a client to try and trash a rival's business. Yes, that's frustrating when you get a bad experience and a warning to others would be appropriate - I've been in that situation myself - but those are the rules here, and they aren't going to change.

 

There are plenty of other boards around where you can post warnings and negative reviews if you like. You're entirely at liberty to join those and contribute there; working out how to tell the difference between a genuine warning and someone with an axe to grind is your problem.

 

Nowhere is perfect. Choose your poison.

[Guest M***s]

I understand that Phaedrus, this goes far beyond the difference between a negative review and a warning.

 

Clearly warnings are allowed here in the proper section of the forum.

It is not difficult to understand the difference between a negative review and a warning related to bait and switch, cash and dash, or dangerous encounters.

 

It is clear from what I have written here, that my experience was all three (I have removed my posts because it is simply not worth the risk to my personal safety seeing as my warning has been removed by mod)

Of course I could be lying, but that does not make the information I have provided any less valid.

I did not slander anyone in my warning, I simply shared the relevant parts of my experience. She was not as she appeared in the photos, certainly not anywhere near her stated age, she stole a large portion of my money, and she threatened my safety.

 

I can not say how many people need to state their experiences with an sp before action can be taken, that is the decision of the moderator to make.

 

What I did not appreciate here was not the fact that I may have stepped over a boundary, nor the fact that I am a new member and my word shouldn't be considered equivalent to gold.

 

I take issue with the fact that I directly asked for advice as to how to proceed in multiple messages to mod.

I did not receive a response in a timely manner (~28 hours) and felt it would be best to post a warning in the applicable category based on the advice received by other forum members.

 

I informed mod that I had done this and further asked for guidance if I had done something wrong.

 

I simply received yet another infraction immediately after posting the warning and no guidance whatsoever pointing out what exactly I did wrong.

I received much the same treatment (albeit 2 infractions) when I politely asked other members if there were other good sites out there similar to Lyla.

 

I do not have time for childish games of this sort and I do not take risking my safety to warn others lightly, it is clear that mod has some sort of axe to grind and I will no longer take part in it.

As I have said, the responsibility now lies with mod to protect other members from this person.

 

Best regards, and this will be my final words from this account. I will heed your advice Phaedrus, there are other websites with a more liberal point of view, and hopefully moderators that do not shy away from providing advice.