Tell me it's normal

[ricknotdeadyet 230]

Tell me it's normal... to fall for your first sp. I know I should perhaps broaden my experiences but the few times I've seen her she's been all I need. Just another stupid old man I guess.

[bucky501 923]

Not stupid.

 

Happened to me a few years ago.

When we finds a person we enjoy , we spend more time with just them

The connection

 

Not unheard of. Young or old!!

[Guest]

Gratz, you are a real human with feelings and a heart. It happens you know. I always tell my clients to experience other companions. It not only keeps things fresh for the client but I know my client doesn't feel pressured to come see me.

 

I'd say enjoy this feeling. As long as you respect the ladies boundaries and do not expect anything other than a client and companion relationship; all is good.

[Mikeyboy 27133]

Tell me it's normal... to fall for your first sp. I know I should perhaps broaden my experiences but the few times I've seen her she's been all I need. Just another stupid old man I guess.

 

It's only normal if you are human. ;)

 

We experience incredible closeness and intimacy with some of these ladies. It is only natural to develop feelings. In fact, the ladies who's company I have enjoyed most are the ones that connect with you beyond the physical. Just try to keep it all in context in your mind. Enjoy your time with her, but see others as well. Enjoy the fantasy that makes these relationships so special.

 

Just make sure to respect the boundaries of the relationship. If you start getting 'creepy', you may end up putting an end to a good thing. Most of the ladies are pretty good at separating their private from professional lives and will do what it takes to guard that division. Otherwise enjoy yourself. It sounds like you have found a gem.

[Grass_Hopper 18263]

You don't have to feel ashamed of falling for your first SP.

 

Be careful, tho. Is your service provider aware of what you feel for her? If so, what does she thinks about it?

 

Maybe a little chat with her, sharing how you feel for her, and see how she feels about it would be your next step...

 

We are sure courtiseanes, but also great councellors...

 

P.S.: To echo what Peachy said, respecting her bounderies is mandatory. You wouldn't want to scare her off, or put her in an akward situation...

[Nicolette Vaughn 294340]

Mi I have men fall in love with me all the time but they are falling in love, not with me but the fantasy or the idea of me. While there are qualities that I bring to the table as an SP are the same as my private life, being an SP is just an extension of me. Not completely who I am.

 

Dont get creepy or become a stalker and you will be fine. Let her know how you feel but never expect anything in return. It's a real big turn off for someone to say this and then feel put upon.

 

My turn off is what we call "Captain save-a-ho". This is what we do for a living and by most accounts speaking for myself or other ladies I know, we are not damsels in distress looking for someone to save them. Many men like to try to fall into that role and when I witness that, I let them go as a client and run for the hills. While this is mostly isolated incident on the whole, some men do overstep their boundaries and ruin a good thing.

 

When clients fall for SPs, it means she is offering the best experience but never have real life expectations . Behind closed doors, fantasy never mirrors reality. All you can do is enjoy the moment.

 

Like Meg said below, if you knew the real me... Not so much nice fantasy anymore. Hehe. Enjoy me as an SP, not the real me! Ask one of my sugar daddies..lol.

[Mikeyboy 27133]

My turn off is what we call "Captain save-a-ho". This is what we do for a living and by most accounts speaking for myself or other ladies I know, we are not damsels in distress looking for someone to save them....

 

You mean 'Pretty Woman' was all a big lie????????? Unbelievable!! ;)

[Hector17 9215]

Very normal for your "fantasy feelings" to collide with reality. I believe they are genuine at their root, and can be the footings of what may develop into a really nice relationship with a beautiful young lady as friendship, enjoying laughter, activities, and trust with no judgements. They are "fantasy feelings" though, and do need to be handled appropriately so they remain harmless, fun and continue to make you feel good.I have fallen in "luv" with several of the beautiful ladies here, and continue to be in that state lol....life is good !!

[Helena D'Orville 33237]

As said previously by everybody, as far as you do not cross any boundary, all is fine. Because think of this: if you enjoy so much this lady's company, wanting more could ruin everything to the point that you could not see her anymore, whether it being your decision, hers, or both yours. Sometimes it does happen, and it is sad. I call it "the painful paradox" when we, ladies, have to stop a lady-gentleman relationship because we have been good at it! In a way, it does not make sense, right? But we are human, and this is a very special business, so sometimes territories can seem blurry. So the strong advice is to stay on the fun and plesant side of it ;-)

[Guest st*****ens**ors]

To feel a connection with someone who has spent intimate time with you is very natural; it's also a basic function of brain chemistry.

 

If you're looking for love, and your life circumstances make that possible, I'd suggest that you're better off dating. My sense is that most men here for any length of time don't have that as an easy option.

 

Honesty is always best however. If you tell the provider about your feelings she'll probably have concerns about boundaries which you should quickly and definitively address.

 

And if you're the exception that proves the rule, you can play a Richard Gere sonata on the nearest piano. I think there's a thread or two in the archives about actual relationships developing between clients and providers. They're a little like Bigfoot, glimpsed at a distance, through mist, but never to be entirely ruled out

 

Best wishes.

[ricknotdeadyet 230]

Thanks - she certainly is a gem but I guess they all are :)

And I certainly hope I don't come off as creepy and clingy - I realize what her end of the deal is.

[MGSP 1593]

Don't ever forget that you're buying a DREAM. If you're feeling that way about your SP, it's because she skillfully and brilliantly fulfilled her part of the deal. Be thankful for that and graceful enough not to ruin a good thing.

 

Enjoy your relationship to the fullest, let your SP know how much you ''appreciate'' her, but don't ever cross the line between fantasy life and real life. Nobody wins when that happens.

[Guest discr33t]

Show her how much you care.

Set up a retainer that gives her a bit more security. Write a wonderfull recommendation for her so she will collect more interest and possible clients.

[mrgreen760 37785]

Pretty normal I'd say, especially early on. Good providers can make one feel like they are the centre of the universe which can be confusing.

 

Sort of like people who have affairs and ultimately end up together often find the stolen moments and special times are very different than a 24-7 365 routine and the fantasy quickly wears off and they flare out.

 

Balance is the key.

 

Peace

MG

[Tempted Monk 5057]

Tell me it's normal... to fall for your first sp. I know I should perhaps broaden my experiences but the few times I've seen her she's been all I need. Just another stupid old man I guess.

 

It is not just normal - it is the best what can happen to you. Yes, maybe it is "just" a dream but if you found the woman of your dream - value this, enjoy your time together, make her feel your goddess even if it is only short hour or two.

When two diverse person meet together and share some act of intimacy, the myriad of different outcomes is possible including good memories, friendship, and yes emotional involvement as well.

It is all very personal. Who can give the rule which outcome should be avoided, what is right and what is wrong? Personally, I think that even illusion of feelings is better than nothing. And can we really define which feelings are real and which are just illusion...

[piano8950 32577]

Tell me it's normal... to fall for your first sp

 

I never felt as if I was falling in love with her. But I have a bit of a soft spot for her. I understand that this is a service, a rather intimate one at that, but I received a kindness and care that was beyond what I had imagined from someone who I hadn't met a day prior. In my situation, I did feel quite vulnerable when I saw my first SP, and she was amazing, and did wonders for my self esteem.

 

I didn't 'fall' for her, but I wouldn't fault anyone, or call someone weird or off if they did. As long as that person reminds themselves of the guidelines, and avoid putting the SP in an awkward spot.

 

----

 

There was one SP which I did feel as if there was something; this was much later on. We lay on her bed, talking. I felt a sort of connection. I enjoyed my time with her, but I quickly decided that it would be best if I didn't see her again. I didn't want to put her and myself into an uncomfortable position.

[ricknotdeadyet 230]

Thanks all for your replies. They've been helpful and some spot-on. Love might be one of the emotions I'm feeling and perhaps also a fantasy of rescuing the poor girl - my logical half understands this and is able to deal with these feelings. I think my emotional half also understands so I'm ok with these feelings.

Being fresh out of a 28-year marriage my goal was to rediscover my sexuality and what it is to be a man and I think she's been a great help, so there's feelings of gratitude mixed in there too.

I think it's all good so far.